Fading Away
by Shad0whuntress
Summary: Me for my little sister's freedom. That was the only bargain he would accept. I'm now a prisoner on Neverland, where he is trying to mold me into a weapon. I promised my sister I would escape, but I have to do it fast. Because if I can't escape, I won't be able to do anything but fade away.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I don't own Ouat, or any of the characters of the show that appear.  
**

When I get out of school (finally), I'm loaded.

Two essays, science questions, and a history test all due Monday. Roxanne and I make arrangements to call, study, and do the science questions together tommorrow. But still, two essays! What's the point of a weekend if they're going to overload us with homework?

T_hank God it's Friday, or I wouldn't be able to survive._

As soon as I'm home, the phone starts ringing.

I know that the only person who would know I'm home at this exact moment is Mom. Because she's called so often that she knows I'm always home at this time. Always to ask me the same question that she has asked me every day, every week for the past year. Seriously, she called before I even put my stuff down. This is getting out of hand.

Rolling my eyes, I pick the phone off the hook, and press the answer button.

"Hey, Mom!" I say cheerfully, keeping my exasperation out of my voice.

"Jess? Oh, thank God, at least someone is picking up the phone!"

She sounds tired. Not a good sign. Somehow, I know how I'm spending my Friday night.

"Don't tell me," I say, sighing with resignation. "Another rough client?"

"Very rough, but very important," she replies wearily. "Would you do me a huge favor, sweetheart, and-."

"Pick up Abby, make her dinner, get her homework done, and put her to bed by nine," I finish.

_Just as I've done every day for this entire week. And the week before that. And the one before that._

Not that I don't love Abby, but this is getting insane. Then again, it was insane when Dad left, too.

"Would you? Oh, thank you, sweetheart."

"No problem," I reply, trying not to let resentment slip into my voice. "See you tonight."

If she's back before I'm asleep.

I hang up, and get back into my car. Honestly, this is getting out of hand. On a weekend like this, it's been fine. But what happens when I want to sleepover at Roxanne's, or see a movie with Dom? Too bad, because Mom's occupied with some big, important client.

_It's not her fault,_ I try to remind myself. _She's going through a lot. Dad leaving out of the blue took a toll on all of us. She's just thrown herself in the work to distract her from the pain. Being a civil divorce lawyer can't be easy along with being a single mom now. The last thing she needs is a whiny seventeen year old's problems added to the pile. _

Still, it doesn't make it right that she's distanced herself from Abby and I, leaving me to practically be the parent to Abby.

I try to stay focused on my driving as I turn onto an access road. I can deal with my parent problems later.

As I'm driving to Abby's grade school, I get a prickly feeling, like someone watching me. But as I look around the road, none but the other drivers are giving me as much as a glance.

I shrug the feeling aside, and pull into the parking lot of Abby's school.

I see her waiting on a bench, with her Hello Kitty backpack beside her. She sees me get out of the car, and immediately stands up and grins. She looks adorable, with her light brown hair pulled back in pigtails, and her blue eyes dancing. I have the same color hair and eyes, but my hair is always pulled back in a simple ponytail.

She waits until I walk to the bench to hug me. She's only seven, but she is already concerned about driving safety. It's her goal to be valedictorian of her driver's-ed class.

"Hey, Jess," she says happily.

I hug her back. I don't care what stares I get. This is my baby sister, it's not like I'm forbidden to love her. Besides, I've learned with Abby to always be the last to let go in a hug. I never know how much she may need it. But, today, it seems like a good day. She's smiling, anyways.

Somehow, even with Mom spending yet another Friday night in the office, and my anger at her and Dad, I can smile some too. I never understood how, but Abby has always had that effect on me. She's a bright little ray of sunshine on a cloudy day, my sister.

"How was school?" I ask as we make our way to the car.

"Fun," she replies. "We learned about camouflage in science, and Thomas Jefferson in history. We also painted pictures in art."

She climbs in the backseat as we drive away.

"What pictures?" I ask, genuinely curious. Back when I was in Second Grade, all we did was make Froot Loops Bracelets. Mine always had the bad habit of being eaten before they could be taken home to show off.

"Penguins on ice," she replies. "But mine came out horrible."

She says it so casually I know there's no point in arguing. Abby is convinced she is the worst artist, but best reader in her class. That may have something to do with how much I read to her.

After we get home, we spend a few minutes eating our favorite after school snack, apple slices and peanut butter, and she begs me to read her more Narnia.

I don't see why not. Thirty minutes of _The Silver Chair _won't hurt either of us.

I pull the book out of my bookcase while she fixes me some water with ice, so I can read without my throat hurting.

When I was reading her _T__he Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe,_ my voice gave out during the battle, and she had to wait a full twenty-four hours to see if Aslan killed the White Witch or not.

I sit down across the table from her, and begin reading.

"The instant the prisoner was free, he crossed the room in a single bound, seized his own sword (which had been taken from him and laid on the table) and drew it. 'You first!' he cried and fell upon the silver chair..."

Abby's eyes widen with delight as she listens to the next chapter of Jill, Eustace, Puddleglum, and Rilian. And, before I know it, I'm totally absorbed in the book as well.

A half hour becomes an hour, and that becomes an hour and a half. Luckily, it's Friday, or else I'd be panicking over homework. Finally, I call a stopping point, so I can make us dinner.

As we wait for the water to boil for the mac-and-cheese. We go back to Narnia, and I have to end the story on a cliffhanger, with Jill being dragged out the hole, so I can drain the pasta.

After dinner, I do dishes while Abby goes to take a bath.

When I'm done, I spend some time with my own book. It's already dark out, and I'm itching to write some more.

_"For a moment, the young thief's heart plunged with terror as the net rose, trapping her. Was this some trap, set by her stepmother? How did the Queen find her?_

_However, with a hearty laugh, the Queen didn't emerge from hiding, but the Prince. _

_'I told you I would find you," he declared triumphantly. "No matter where you go, I will always find you.'_

_'Is this the only way you can catch a woman? By entrapping her?' the thief shot back. _

_'It's the only way to catch thieving scum," replied the Prince. _

_The thief laughed at the man's taunts. _

_'Aren't you a real-'"_

Suddenly, I'm cut off by a shriek.

I stop, and turn to look upstairs, where Abby is supposed to be getting ready for bed. Alarms are going off in my head, and I know something is wrong.

"JESS!"

I get up and run up the stairs, to my sister's room.

"Abby!" I shout, finding the door closed.

I turn the handle, but it's locked. That's not possible. Abby's door doesn't have a lock!

"Abby, open the door!" I order.

Instead, all I hear is her whimpering.

Anger and fear course through me with adrenaline. Something is threatening my sister. Something bad.

Without stopping to think, I lift my foot, and kick the door open.

I run in, and see Abby whimpering in the corner.

I stop dead in my tracks, and gasp.

Hovering over her is a shadow. A disembodied shadow, with glowing eyes.

_That's impossible. That can't be here. Something like that, it can't be real. _

I blink, and shake my head a little. But it's still there.

It's still here, but if it has noticed me, it hasn't done anything. It just stares at Abby, and slowly stretches out it's hand. Almost as if it's offering her it's hand.

_Oh, God, what does this thing want to do with my sister?!_

No, I can't let her get hurt. I can't let it do anything to her. I don't know how, but just by being near this thing I can sense it is dark and twisted. Evil. Whatever it wants with Abby, it can't be good.

_But what will it do? What is it even doing here? How is something like that even real?_

The shadow is still offering it's hand to Abby.

Focus. I have to stay focused. The shadow isn't here for me, it's here for Abby. It's going to take her unless I do something.

_If I don't-._

_No, I can't think of that now!_

Abby seems to sense that it's dangerous as well. Rather than taking the shadow's hand, she tries to back away into her corner with her hands behind her back.

Part of me tells me that I need to run away and get help, but I know it won't come in time. Right now, I may be the only person that keeps Abby from being taken.

God, what is this thing?!

I push my shock back, and my eyes meet Abby. She's terrified. If I'm going to get her out out of this, I can't be scared. I won't let my little sister get hurt.

I feel every part of my body shake as I look back at the shadow, but I fight to remain calm. Being scared will not help. Won't it?

"Okay, Abby," I say, keeping my eyes fixed on the thing. At the sound of my voice, it looks up at me. I can feel its eyes looking into me, piercing my mind and soul and analyzing them like a science experiment.

Panic sears through me, and for a moment, my words get stuck in my throat. This is something from fairy tales. How can it be real?

No, I have to remain calm!

"Abby, I want you to keep your eyes on that, but walk towards me very slowly," I say, trying to keep my voice from trembling. But what if that's the wrong thing to do? What if it's like a dog that sees looking it in the eyes as a challenge?

Abby does what I say, and the shadow turns back to her, and looks at her.

She's whimpering, and I feel just as scared. I can't show her that, though. I take care of her. It's my job to be the calm one. I can't let her know that I'm just as afraid of thing.

Yet as she backs away slowly, towards me, the shadow doesn't react at all. Its eyes just follow her.

She is only ten steps from me...eight...five...three…

The shadow suddenly launches itself at my sister, and grabs her wrist.

She screams and tries to pull away, but the shadow floats to the window, and it opens its own.

"NO!"

Instinctively, I leap forward, and grab Abby's other arm, pulling her back.

The shadow, whatever it is, is strong.

It drags us to the window, and flies out, taking Abby with it. She somehow hovers beside it, and I almost lose my grip in shock.

Despite all the questions and fear running through me, one clear thought runs through my head: _I won't let it take her._

"Jess!" cries Abby, as I pull her to me, back into her room.

"Let go of her!" I yell at the thing, yanking at my sister's arm.

I don't care how long I have to pull, how much I may hurt. _I can't-I won't-let it take her!_

"YOU'RE NOT TAKING HER!" I shout, pulling my struggling sister into the room.

The shadow looks down at me, and I feel the piercing gaze again. But I grit my teeth, and refuse to let go. I refuse to let it take her. Not Abby. Not my sister.

"Don't let go," pleads Abby. I won't. I refuse to let go of her hand, if it's the last thing I can do. I won't let this thing take her. I don't know how something like this exists, but if it's as evil as I sense it is, it will hurt her. I cannot let that happen to my little sister.

Suddenly, the shadow's other hand reaches out, and slams into my chest, with enough force to stop a race car.

I'm thrown back across the room, and into the wall of the room.

"JESS!"

My breath is knocked out of my lungs, and everything is spinning.

I slide down the floor, and everything goes black.

The last thing I'm aware of is my baby sister's screams.

**Reviews are greatly appreciated! **


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: I do not own OUAT, or any of the characters from the show that are in this story. Oh, and thank you for bringing up such a painful subject. While you're at it, why not give me a nice paper cut and pour lemon juice on it? **

_Something is very, very wrong._

Colors are swirling around me, and my head is spinning.

_This shouldn't be happening. It can't be happening._

It would be great if I could actually remember what is happening.

Something...important. Really important.

I try to get ahold of myself, but it's next to impossible. My head is killing me. If it would just stop spinning, maybe I could open my eyes.

But it feels like I've forgotten how to open my eyes. Or move my hands.

I can't even tell if my senses are working. I don't hear anything, I don't feel anything.

It's as if I'm lost in this blur, and I can't find anything. I'd move my hands if I could find them and remember how to use them. I'd open my eyes if I could find my eyelids, and remember how to see.

Maybe I'm dead? That would explain why I was worried. But I always thought death would be much more-I don't know-dramatic. Like the light at the end of the tunnel.

No, I'm not dead. I think my head's slowing down, and I think I hear...something.

Yeah, I'm starting feel something under my fingers. I'm not sure what, but it feels smooth and damp under my fingertips. And I can smell something too. I think I'm smelling something that goes with what I'm touching. The scent is familiar, but I can't remember where I've smelled it before.

_Dirt! That's what it is._

I feel a small surge of pride for figuring out that riddle, when I face a bigger one: why do I feel dirt?

And what am I feeling around my body?

Wrapped around, all with different textures...oh, right, clothing.

I can feel my clothes on me, my jeans, boots, tank top, and jean jacket.

_That's right._

I think my head has stopped spinning, but the spinning is replaced with a sudden, painful headache.

Groaning, I open my eyes, and try to start moving. I can see I'm lying on the ground. When did I lie down on the dirt?

It's hard. I can't get up without a wave of dizziness overwhelming me, but eventually, I get myself into a sitting position. The killer headache isn't helping either.

For what feels like hours, I stare blankly at my surroundings, not taking in anything. I finally make one conclusion: I'm in some sort of jungle.

One clear thought flashes in my head: _there are no jungles near home._

It's enough to jolt my senses a little. How did I end up here? Am I just dreaming?

If that's the case, then shouldn't I try waking up?

Slowly, I try pinching myself, hard. The pain is very real, but if anything, it helps everything come more into focus. I try slapping myself with similar results.

It's as if I can't wake up.

Panic surges through me, as I try to stand. Another dizzy spell attacks me, and I sit back down. But it does nothing to stop me from whipping my head around, trying to believe that it's not real.

_This is just a dream. A really bad dream. This can't be real!_

_It's just another dream,_ I tell myself, trying to calm down. _Remember, you were in the middle of writing..._

That's right, I was writing. Mom was staying late, and Abby was getting ready for bed. I was writing, and…

Suddenly, it all comes back to me, like a wave crashing on the shore.

That shadow thing. It took Abby. It took Abby and slammed me against the wall when I tried to stop it.

_So how did I end up in a jungle?_

I am really in a jungle. I don't know how I'm certain. Maybe it's the feeling that there is someone, or something, present in this place. Something neither good nor bad, but wild and powerful. Besides, I usually don't have this much awareness in my dreams.

I don't know how I got here, either. Maybe the shadow took me when it knocked me out. I don't know.

But I do know that it took Abby as well, and if it brought me here, then Abby's here also. I have to find her.

Strange plants brush past by legs as I run, but I take no notice. I'm aware that I have absolutely no idea where I am, but I don't care. My gut is telling me that Abby is here also. So, if I have to tear the jungle apart tree by tree, so help me, I will.

For what feels like hours, I wander aimlessly, shouting her name. Nothing. My shouts just fade into the darkness.

I don't know how long I search, but all I can think about is Abby, in the hands of that thing. Whatever it is, whatever its plans, when I find it, I'm going to tear it into two and shove the upper half up its own...

You know, I probably shouldn't finish that.

I suddenly become aware of a light, in the distance. It looks like a firelight.

Instinctively, I head towards it as fast as I can. The fire can have two options. Either Abby's there, and I can get her out, or she's not there and whoever built the fire can help me reach her.

I start running, knowing that whatever it is, I need to hurry and find my sister. It takes me longer than I would like, but eventually, I reach the clearing with the fire.

It seems to be some sort of camp, with a bunch of boys, dressed Robin Hood style, some as young as ten, others no older than eighteen. Some are sword fighting, others are throwing knives, or firing arrows, while a few are climbing the tall trees with difficulty. They're all carrying some sort of weapon; arrows, knives, swords, clubs.

On the other side of the clearing tied to a tree, is Abby.

I let out a gasp, and resist the urge to run out and get her.

If the boys have her tied up, then they won't let her go if I ask nicely. I look from a distance though, trying to see if she's hurt.

Her hair is dry, which is odd, considering that she only took a bath a few hours ago. She is shivering like she's cold, and looks scared to death. But overall, she seems alright.

Her eyes look up, as if she feels someone watching her, and she sees me.

Her eyes widen, and I put a finger over my lips, motioning her to stay quiet. She nods, and I signal her to wait. I slowly back away into the shadows, and edge around the clearing. Once I'm behind her, I see her watching me with terrified eyes. The boys are too involved in their games to notice. I creep over to her, as silently as possible, and motion her to stay quiet.

Silently, I look at the ropes that tie her to the tree. I find a knot and struggle with it for a moment. But it's really complex. I see stray weapons lying scattered around us, including a knife, not too far away. Should I go for it, and risk being seen, or should I try to undo the knot on my own?

Making a split second decision, I go for the knife. In a single bound, I grab it, and in another, I'm back by Abby's side, and cutting the ropes as fast as possible.

"Well, look at this."

I freeze, and look at the ropes. Halfway cut. If we ran, she probably could break them while running. Probably the best plan if worse comes to worse. I look up and stand.

All the boys have stopped, and are watching, and I instinctively stand between them and Abby.

The speaker is a boy, probably no older than eighteen, with shaggy, dirty blonde hair, green-grey eyes, and a smirk that makes me want to slap him across the face.

But there's something else.

A sort of twisted feeling washes over me as I look at him. It's like looking at something dark and evil, and it stares you back at the face.

He looks me up and down, and I inwardly shudder at the feeling. It feels the same as the shadow looking at me.

I don't show anything that would show the creeps he's giving me, but match his smirk with a glare.

"So, you're the brave, older sister who trying to save little Abby," he says, smirk still on his face. He has a British accent that would probably would half the girls in school swooning, but to me it just sounds annoying. He's clearly the leader.

I clench my teeth at the way he refers to her. Something in his voice when he said her name, it wasn't like he was talking about another human being, much less, my baby sister.

"I have to say, I'm a little disappointed," he continues. "The way she goes on about you, I would have thought the two of you would be gone within an hour."

How could Abby have "gone on" about me? She's only been here for a little while. He makes it sound like she's been here for hours.

"Sorry to disappoint," I reply, sarcastically, pushing the thought aside. My heart is pounding, and it's only the other boys' weapons that are keeping me from pummeling this guy.

His smirk, if possible, seems to get bigger.

I have to clench my hands to fists to resist slapping him. I mentally remind myself that I have a knife that I can use on them.

"Like you said, it took me a long time," I say, trying to end this quickly. "So, if you'd be so kind as to let my sister go, we'll be leaving, and we won't be bothering you again."

The boy raises an eyebrow, but his smirk is still in place. Well, so much for asking nicely.

"How do you know your sister wants to leave?" he asks, tauntingly.

"The fact that she's tied to a tree is a bit of a giveaway," I reply flatly. "I'd appreciate it if you'd let me cut her loose."

The look on his face tells me he won't do it without throttling him first.

He laughs at this, which only gets me angrier. My sister is tied to a tree like a dog, and this arrogant bastard is laughing at me like I'm funny.

Unable to control myself anymore, I punch him in the jaw.

The laughter stops immediately, and I can feel the tension rise, like the air has dropped ten degrees.

The boy touches the place where I hit him, and I see his lip bleeding.

"Oh," he says, the smirk returning. "You've got fire."

"And I like to give people third degree burns," I snap. "Which is exactly what I'll do to you if you don't let her go."

Some of the boys are fingering their weapons. Now that the line has been crossed, and I attacked their leader, they can fight me. And I only have a knife that I don't know how to use.

_Smart, Jess, real smart._

The boy, however holds up his hand, as if there is no need. I hate the way he looks at me. Its like I'm an interesting, unknown specimen that he wants to learn about.

"I can see why Abby put so much trust in you," he says, his ever-present smirk taunting.

I don't know what he's playing at, so I let him continue.

"And you must really love her to come into Neverland."

This makes me pause.

"Neverland?" I repeat. I'm pretty sure the guy has lost it, but I had my suspicions when I got a look at what he and his little fraternity were wearing.

He grins in answer.

I can tell by the look on his face that he's proud to have caught me off guard.

"You're a little old to be coming in by a dream, " he says, sounding curious. "How old are you?"

I bite back my tongue. I will not play whatever game he's playing.

"She's seventeen," cries Abby behind me. I cringe as she says it. She sounds terrified, and I want to get her out of here, now.

The boy cocks his eyebrow in surprise.

"We don't usually get dream visitors that old," he says, almost admiringly. "You must have been intent on finding your sister when you fell asleep."

"I was knocked out as your shadow thing was taking her," I reply sarcastically. "She was really on my mind."

Wait a second…

The shadow thing, Neverland, leader of a group of immature guys, green clothes.

I groan and rub the bridge of my nose.

"You think you're Peter Pan, don't you?" I ask.

The boy's grin gets bigger. I ought to punch him again.

"I _am_ Peter Pan," he replies, smiling like he's just got handed the thousand bucks he needed to start a nuclear war. Which would take more than a thousand bucks, but the metaphor is still catchy.

"And these," he says, gesturing to the group standing around us, "are the Lost Boys."

The guy is insane; I knew it!

Well, I've had enough of his stupid game, arrogant smirk, and delusions of grandeur.

"I don't care if you're Luke Skywalker," I say, my voice dripping with venom. "Cut. Abby. Loose."

"Not sure who this Luke Skywalker person is, but he sounds important," he replies. "And as for releasing Abby…"

He steps closer to us.

I retreat a step, and hold my knife between him and me.

But instead, he steps around me, and crouches down beside Abby.

I grip the knife, ready to stick him, when he looks up at me. There is a horrible glimmer in his eyes, and the twisted feeling I had becomes stronger.

"Why would I want to do that?" he asks. "I've never had a pet before, but always wanted one."

As he finishes, he reaches out, and strokes her hair, as if she were a pet cat.

I realize what was in his voice when he talked about Abby. It was like talking about a new puppy that he just got.

My sister whimpers, and shies away from his touch.

Rage surges through me, and I launch myself at the bastard, snarling. I don't care if all I have is a knife, or that he has a group of boys who are all armed. No one touches my baby sister like that!

Ever.

He stands up suddenly, and holds out his hand.

I stop and a strange feeling washes over me. I'm suddenly tired, but not enough to fall back asleep. Something is wrong.

I feel like the world is fading, but coming back into focus at the same time.

The knife suddenly slips through my hand, and I gasp as I see myself. I'm becoming transparent, like a ghost.

I lose control of my legs, and fall to the ground on all fours.

"JESS!" cries Abby, struggling against the ropes.

A tall boy with pale hair and a pale face, marred by a scar, calmly holds her back.

"Abby!" I shout, trying to reach her. My way is blocked by Pan, though. His smirk is even more taunting as he looks down at me, and I know that whatever is happening to me is his doing. The eager glint in his eyes tells me that much.

"What...are...you...doing?" I pant, trying to fight the sudden sleepiness.

"Helping you wake up," he replies calmly. "You are here in a dream, Jess. And you need to wake up. We only need your sister."

Now, I see myself becoming more solid, but everything around me is fading to black.

Abby is squirming like a snake in the Lost Boy's grip, and I catch a glimpse at her terrified, desperate eyes.

Real, pure terror, strikes me like lightning. Somehow, I know that if I wake up, I'll never see her again. I can't abandon her. I can't!

"Please," I plead, looking up at Pan. "Let her go. I'll do anything."

His eyes light up, and I can practically feel the darkness radiating off him and touching me. The look in his eyes...he's wanted me to say that the moment I came. He's waking me up to push me into saying it.

"Anything?" he repeats.

I nod, desperate.

The jungle is slowly fading to black, and I can start to feel the carpet of Abby's bedroom beneath my fingers.

I'm laying down now, and fighting hard to focus on the jungle.

"Please," I repeat, not caring if that I've stooped to begging. "I'll give you anything you want."

I feel tears pooling in my eyes, and I pray that he'll listen before I wake up.

"Promise?" he asks, his eyes glinting with an eager malice.

"Promise," I reply, looking at my sister. She and her holder fade to black with the rest.

Though if he asks for a million dollars…

I'll rob a bloody bank if I have too. I need to save Abby.

The jungle is slowly looking more and more like Abby's room.

I'm vaguely aware of the leader crouching over me, and hissing in my ear.

"Because the only deal I'll accept, _Jess_," he murmurs. "the only way I'm going to let her go, is if when the shadow returns with her, you go back with the shadow."

Oh, god! Oh, god!

That's his deal.

Abby's freedom for mine.

I feel another form of terror as I look into those evil, eager eyes.

I can't even see the rest of Neverland anymore. Or the Lost Boys. Or Abby. Just Pan.

I won't lose her to him. I won't abandon her to be Pan's pet.

"Deal," I breathe.

**A/N: I'll let all you lovely readers in on a little secret: my computer runs on Spurs victories, and reviews. The Spurs are keeping my computer powered right now, but once the games are over, my computer won't be able to run. And if my computer can't run, I can't post more chapters. So, please, review and keep my computer running!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: I do not own OUAT, or any of the characters from the show that are in this story. Unless claiming I own the show means I get to meet Colin O'Donoghue. Then, by all means, I own OUAT!  
**

For a moment, my eyes are closed, as Pan fades away. Then I open them.

I'm back in Abby's room. It's as if I had never left. I sit up, and look wildly around, sure that I'm going to see the jungle or the camp somewhere in the room.

But Pan, the jungle, the Lost Boys, and the camp are all gone.

I allow myself to exhale, and stand. Immediately, the pain in my head doubles, and I use the wall for support. I slowly reach up, and find a warm, sticky substance in my hair. Blood, from where I hit my head.

I feel dizzy again, and have to sit back down. The room is kind of chilly with the window open, but that's the most I can register.

However, the shock has yet to fade. Had that all been a dream? I just woke up. It's quite possible it was a dream, and my imagination was just going wild.

There's no way I could have been in Neverland of all places, with Peter Pan, and the Lost Boys. That's impossible. Besides, it doesn't make any sense. Peter Pan is supposed to be a good _kid_, not a manipulative _teenager_.

_Of course, this version of him is kinda cute,_ I think to myself.

I shake my head telling myself to snap out of it. It seems like it should have been a dream. It has to be a dream.

_But if that's the case,_ I think, _then where's Abby? And how did you end up against the wall?_

The pain in my head echoes, and I screw my eyes shut, trying to concentrate. It's impossible. There's no way all of that could have happened, and in only a few minutes. So, why does it make so much sense?

Abby clearly isn't here, and I didn't hit my head that hard by accident. It seems impossible, yet it is the only thing that makes sense.

Did the Lost Boys really kidnap Abby? And did I just make a bargain to go in exchange for her freedom?

There's no way...but still.

I look out the window, and see two figures heading towards the window.

Instinctively, I know it's Abby and the shadow. My heart drops. It did happen. Oh, God, it really did happen. I really went to Neverland, and I really traded my freedom for Abby's.

Panic spreads through me, and I somehow find myself standing.

_I don't want to_, I think, starting to feel hysterical. _Oh, God, I don't want to do this. I don't want to go! _

Maybe, if I hide, the shadow will leave Abby and leave us alone. Or maybe if I tried to fight it, it would go away.

_No,_ says a firm voice in my head. _Even if it seems like it shouldn't be happening, you made that deal. If you break it, he'll just take Abby back, and you won't see her again. You wanted to save Abby when you woke up, so grit your teeth, and suck it up._

I breath out, trying to calm down. I have to let it take me. I don't know what Pan did to Abby when she was in Neverland, even if it seems like a few minutes, but it obviously terrified her. I won't let her go through that again.

I know need to be here when they reach here, so that the shadow will know that I'm keeping the bargain, but part of me wants to run downstairs, and call Mom. And Roxanne and Dom. To tell them what's happened, that I love them, and that I'm going to be alright.

I hope.

I'll have to do that after Abby is safe. Once she's in her room, I'll say goodbye to her and the rest of them.

A moment later, the shadow, and Abby land in the room.

The shadow still freaks me out, and I back away, as it gently sets Abby down.

I get one look at her tear-stained face, and try to hold back my own. God, why is this happening?

"Jess, you can't go!" she sobs, as she runs into my arms.

She wraps her arms tightly around me, and I hug her back with all that I'm worth.

"You can't leave!" she continues. "I-I don't want t-to lose you!"

I don't want to lose her either. I don't want to let go of my sister.

I just want to freeze time, in this moment, and stay here, holding my sister.

"I know, Abby," I murmur, feeling tears leaking down my face. "And I don't want to leave you either. But I need you to be brave."

I take a moment to look into her eyes.

"I need you to be brave like you were in Neverland," I tell her.

"I wasn't brave," she replies, looking heartbroken. "You were."

I want to tell her that I'm not. That she was so brave, refusing to scream when we were in that jungle. Even when she was scared, she would not break down in front of Pan. As her older sister, I always tried to be the one who put on the strong face, so that Abby wouldn't have to. I never knew that she could do it.

But as I open my mouth to tell her that she was brave, and that I'm proud of her, something grabs my upper arm, and starts pulling me away.

The shadow. Its touch is like sticking your arm in a bucket of ice water. Yet, as soon as it touches me, the pain in my head evaporates.

It makes me stand, and starts to drag me away from Abby, who is still clinging tightly to me.

"Wait!" I shout at it, as it pulls me towards the window. "I didn't get to say good-bye!"

"Jess!" cries Abby, as we approach the window.

"I didn't-," I start, but the shadow ignores my protests, as it flies through the window, taking me with it. Abby is the only thing holding us back.

Desperate, I turn to her.

"I love you, Abby!" I cry. "I love you!"

"Please, don't take her!" she shouts at the shadow. Her voice is so full of pain, I feel weak.

"I will come back, Abby!" I whisper. "I swear, I will find a way to escape! I _will_ come back! Until then, just know that I love you!"

She only looks at me, tears pouring from her eyes.

"I love you too, Jess."

I don't want to leave her. Dang it, I don't want to do this!

_I'm doing this for her_, I remind myself. _I won't let Pan hurt her. _

"Please, Jess," she whispers. "Please, don't let go."

That's the second time she's asked this.

The first time, I swore I wouldn't. This time, I have too. I can't let the shadow take her away again.

"I love you, Abby," I murmur.

And I let go.

"NO!" she screams, as the shadow and I fly away. "NO! JESS! JESS!"

"I love you, Abby!" I shout again.

I get one last look at her face. One last look at my angelic, heartbroken, baby sister's face.

Then, the distance becomes too great, and all I can make out is our house. My house. My home.

Then, it too is too far away to see.

I turn, as the shadow flies me through the city, the place I grew up. Mom's probably in one of those buildings, unaware that I'm being taken away like this.

_Maybe if she stuck around a little more, she'd notice,_ I think bitterly, but I'm distracted when the shadow flies at full speed at a skyscraper. I feel my stomach plummet, and a shriek escapes me as we almost smash into it. The shadow pulls out at the last second, and my boot scrapes the rooftop. I think my heart stopped for a second.

_What is this thing playing at?_ I wonder. _That was_ way _too close!_

It flies me over rooftops, and skyscrapers, most a little too close for my liking. If it weren't for my death grip on it, and if it wasn't moving me at the last second, I probably be smashing into buildings like an urban George of the Jungle.

After we come way too close to hitting a twelve story office building, I realize what it's doing.

Its making me cling on to it even tighter, making me rely on it a little more, as it takes me away. Already, its making me trust Pan and Neverland.

It still has taken me a while to register that I've met with Peter Pan, and am heading to Neverland. And I thought the night that Roxanne and I went through an entire tub of ice cream, while watching a Star Wars Marathon, wearing Princess Leia wigs had been a weird night.

Finally, the shadow starts to head towards the sky.

Specifically, towards two really bright stars. Oh, yeah. Second star to the right, and straight on till morning.

As we fly, I watch the city disappear below us, and my stomach plunges. I've never been afraid of heights, but even from this high up...I tighten my grip on the shadow.

Which means that I've already begun to trust it. Actually, never mind. I loosen my grip. Better to drop a thousand feet to your death than trust this thing. It's not the fall that'll hurt, it's the landing that'll kill me, anyway.

The stars slowly start to become closer, and the one on the right starts to look more and more like an island.

When I get the courage to look down again, I see that we're actually above water.

I look back, but the city is gone.

It's like that painting in _The Voyage of the Dawn Treader_. You go in, but once you're in, you can't see the way you came.

The island becomes bigger, and a sound reaches me, one that I wasn't expecting. It's children, crying.

I gasp, and start to struggle against the shadow's grip.

The fear I felt when Pan made his deal comes back to me. What kind of place is this, where children cry? And so many, at that, if I can hear it from here.

I look down, and see a ship below.

A really old ship, with sails and everything. It reminds me of the old pirate movies.

"HELP!" I scream down at it.

The shadow looks at me, and it's grip on my arm tightens. It flies faster towards the island.

I start struggling against it even harder, but it ignores me.

We start to fly closer to the trees, just as we did when it first took me, and we were flying over the city.

It starts to slow down, so we must be coming up to wherever Pan is.

My feet start to brush the top branches, and the shadow seems less intent on not having me hit anything.

Suddenly, it let's go.

I scream as I fall towards the ground.

For a second, I'm falling through the air, the next, I hit the ground, and all air is knocked out of my lungs.

I lay still for a moment, trying to take the air back in, and figure everything out.

Surprisingly, I'm not hurt that much. A little bruised maybe, but other than that…

"Welcome to Neverland, Jess."

I look up, to see the pale haired, scarred Lost Boy who had held Abby back only minutes ago, leaning lazily against a tree, holding a large club.

I get up, refusing to look weak, even in front of this douche bag.

"Pan will be very pleased that you arrived so soon," he says, with a slight southern twang in his voice.

I consider running, but the club tells me that's not a smart move.

"He dragged me away before I got the chance to say good-bye to my family. I'm not too surprised that I got here early," I reply. I try to say it with an icy tone, but my voice raises, and I end up sounding slightly hysterical.

Scarface laughs at this.

"As Pan will tell you when you reach camp," he says. "The Lost Boys are your family now."

_Never. These twisted maniacs, even if they are fairy tale characters, will not be my family_.

Ever.

My family is Abby and Mom, not these psychos.

"You really expect me to believe that?" I ask, not bothering to hide my disgust.

He shrugs, and walks over to me.

"Come on," he says in a monotone voice. "Pan is waiting."

Well the brat can wait a little longer. Heck, he can wait all he wants, but I'm not going to give in that easily.

"Fine, but can I pee first?" I ask, still allowing my disgust and anger to enter my voice. If I pretend to be nonchalant and innocent, he'll see through it in a second.

Scarface smirks.

"How stupid do you think I am?" he asks.

_Does he really want me to answer that? _

I roll my eyes, and take a rebellious stance. I need to make this as believable as possible.

"I got taken away by a creepy shadow thing-which shouldn't be real, by the way- just minutes after waking up from a blow to the head that probably gave me a concussion," I reply, talking a mile a minute. He'll either get really annoyed and just let me go, or he'll just get confused. I can work with either one.

"Then I got dragged away by a shadow-which still shouldn't exist- got taken to Neverland, which also shouldn't exist, by the way, and am talking to a scar faced Lost Boy, who also shouldn't exist. All in all, it's amazing that I haven't pissed myself yet."

Scarface rolls his eyes.

Well, at least I've got him annoyed. Though with that club, annoying him may not be the best thing to do, now that I think about it.

"Do it behind there," he orders, pointing at a nearby tree.

"Thank you," I reply shortly, and step behind the tree.

I count to three, then turn and take off. I've maybe taken five steps when he grabs me from behind, pulling me back. I turn, ready to punch him, when I see his calm smirk. He obviously expects to take me down in a fist fight. He probably will.

_Sheesh, what is it with these guys and smirking?_

Pushing the question back, I give him a pointed look, and move towards a different tactic.

"I don't know about you," I say sarcastically, "but it takes me more than three seconds to go."

He snorts, and I throw away the running-while-pretending-to-pee plan.

I take a split second to analyze him, and I notice a long, eighteen inch, knife in his belt. Good, I can use that. He looks like he knows how to use the club though, and he's bigger than me. Yeah, he'll definitely be able to take me down in a fist fight.

"Of course, you are a boy, so it could be different for you," I continue, shrugging.

I'm just making it up as I go along. But, it seems this comment has the desired effect. He gives me a confused look.

"What does that mean?" he asks, clearly not believing me.

"Well, girls have one distinct advantage that guys lack," I explain, as if it were totally obvious. "Or, I guess, guys have a distinct disadvantage that girls lack."

"Which is?" he asks.

Okay, let it be said that he walked into this one the way a bird hits a glass door at 70 miles an hour.

"These!" I say, as I knee him in the nuts.

He gasps, and sinks down.

Not wasting a second, I grab his club, and yank it away.

_Jeez, this thing is heavy!_

Hoisting it up, I swing and hit him on the small of his back, which will at least knock all the air out of his lungs.

With a small grunt, I swing back and hit him in the head with the club. He collapses immediately.

That should knock him out, maybe even give him a concussion, if I'm lucky. Dropping the club, I start to search Scarface's body for something I can use.

The club is _way_ too heavy to take with me, but at least I can take the knife.

After I take it, I take his cloak and hood. I noticed all the boys in the camp were wearing hoods, and I can hide my hair and clothes under it. Denim jackets and tank-tops aren't exactly Robin Hood style.

After that, I run.

I don't recognize this part of the island from when I was looking for Abby, but then again, I wasn't exactly paying attention.

_Abby. I already miss her. Hopefully she's okay. _

I can't help but wonder what she did after the shadow took me. Hopefully called Mom, or 911, at the very least. I don't think either will believe her, but they'll know she's alone.

_Mom may even put her client on hold,_ I think, sarcastically. _As long as Abby called her first, and not 911._

This reminds of why I have to get back home. Mom has thrown herself too deeply into her work. She won't start taking care of Abby at the drop of a hat. Or the disappearance of a daughter.

_Maybe she never should have stopped taking care of Abby. Maybe, that would make taking care of Abby when I'm gone much easier. _

Which is why I need to get back, fast. At least, that way, Abby won't be neglected for too long.

I know that Pan had meant that I come and live with the Lost Boys when we made the deal, but we never said anything about how long I stay in Neverland, or if I stay with the Lost Boys. I'm going to milk those loopholes for all their worth.

I run through the jungle, keeping my hand on the knife, just in case. Something tells me once someone finds Scarface, or when he wakes up, there'll be a search for me. There may even be one now.

I just hope the shadow isn't involved. After flying with that thing, I don't want to be within fifty feet of it.

After a while, I pause to catch my breath. I can only take a few minutes at most. I don't want to stay in one place too long.

I look up, in a gap in the trees, and see the moon, which seems to be rising. Meaning, I've headed east for a while. Useless, but nice to know.

Feeling like I've got my breath back, I take off again, this time making sure to keep quiet. They've probably realized that something is wrong at least, and I don't want them catching me because I'm loud.

I consider climbing a tree, but that would leave me vulnerable to the shadow. Not a great idea.

At best, I can run try to find rocky ground, because its harder to track people on rock than it is on dirt.

And, since I don't know how long I'll be here, I'll need to find a water source soon. And a food source.

Well, at least I have a knife, which will be helpful for the last one.

Lost in thought, my foot trips over a tree root, and I fall.

It isn't until I get up that I realize that I've tuned out the crying I heard when I got close to Neverland.

Why, though? Why are there children crying? And who are they?

Surely not Pan's little minions.

I stop suddenly, when I see a light approaching. It's about twenty yards away, and it looks like lantern or candle light.

Probably the Lost Boys.

I immediately slip behind a tree, and remain perfectly still.

I can hear the boys coming closer and closer.

From what I can tell by their voices, at least two, maybe three.

They're too far away for me to make out what they're saying, but at least I know how many. And unfortunately, it's too many to take out on my own.

One, that would be fine. Two, if I got lucky. Three...pushing it.

Then again, I was unarmed with Scarface. Maybe I'll be able to take down these guys without having to draw my stolen knife.

Biting my lip, I decide not to risk it. I can't rely on my wits so much that I get cocky.

But they are coming closer.

I will have to do something soon.

Sneaking away sounds good.

I start moving towards the shadows when one of the boys calls out, "Hey!"

I freeze for a second, then make my posture casual.

"Anything?" the boy calls.

Oh, yeah, with my hood and my back towards him, they wouldn't recognize me. Until they see my jeans, anyway.

"Nothing," I call back, making my voice as gruff as possible.

"Well, keep looking," says the boy.

I nod, thanking all the lucky stars in the sky. Except the second one to the right, maybe.

It isn't until I've almost reached into the shadows that one boy calls to me, "Hey, where's your lantern?"

I shrug as casually as possible, but I know that he's figured it out.

As soon as I'm completely out of the light, I take off like the devil himself were after me. Which may very well be true.

Hey! Hey, it's her!" shouts the boy, as I run.

_Shoot!_

I'm running back the way I came, not allowing myself to look back, or to do anything else but focus on running.

If I can find some good foliage to hide in…

I hear them running after me, and by the sound of it, more have joined. Great. I move to the side of my path and into the foliage. I don't hide though. I keep running.

But only for a minute, so that I can be far enough in. I crouch down, and don't even breath. My heart seems to be pounding way too loudly. I hear them pass, but stay very, very still.

_Think, Jess, think._

They know I'm wearing a hood, and that I don't have a lantern. And that I'm alone. Obviously I can't ditch the hood, and I have to stay alone. But if I can find a lantern…

Leaving my hiding place, I run the way I was originally going, before I bumped into the Lost Boys. I continue for a while, this time refusing to stop and catch my breath. Definitely not with the Lost Boys looking for me.

I do find my water source soon enough. A wide river that looks pretty deep.

_Let me get sick and die, I don't care. It's better than staying with the Lost Boys. _

Actually, I am pretty thirsty, and this water seems clean. I take another drink, and splash some on my face.

"Are you thirsty?"

I stop, and my hands ball into fists at the familiar accent. I turn around slowly to see Pan leaning against a tree trunk, looking amused. The same feeling of something dark and twisted washes over me, and I see him flicking his wrist casually at me.

Suddenly, I fall backwards into the water, and I vaguely hear Pan's laugh. I grit my teeth under the water. He pushed me in, I know it. But I refuse to resurface.

I don't care if I drown, or if I swim away. It's better than being with Pan.

Only seconds later, I feel strong hands grab me by my torso and pull me out of the water. I immediately struggle, not because I can't escape, but because the grip has the same iciness the shadow had. And this close, I feel the same darkness that I feel when facing the shadow or Pan.

I look down as I'm pulled out of the water, and recognize the cuffs on the wrists. It isn't the shadow that pulled me out. It is Pan.

Pan turns me around to face him, and the fear I've refused to show since I found Abby finally makes its appearance.

My struggles start to increase. I squirm, claw at his face, bite at his hand. Anything to get away from him. He only smirks and grips my wrists so tightly I can feel them bruise. I try to pull away, but his grip only tightens.

"I think," he says. "that I'm going to have a lot of fun with you."

Surprisingly, it's because of his smirk and his words that I'm able to calm down.

_I need to be calm. If I'm going to escape-which I will-I need to keep my head._

So instead of struggling harder and panicking, I instead adopt a look of cold, controlled anger.

"Let. Go. Of. Me," I say slowly and clearly, through clenched teeth.

He raises an eyebrow at me in surprise.

"Are you sure you want me to do that?" he asks. "I mean, I know you survived your fall with the shadow, but there's no telling if you'd survive this fall."

_What does he…oh no._

I look down, and my eyes widen.

Pan and I are flying at least a hundred feet off the ground.

"HOLY CRAP!" I yell, and I find myself gripping Pan as tightly as he is holding me.

Pan laughs at my shock, and I immediately loosen my hold.

The sneaky bastard did that on _purpose._

"Watch your language, Vin, or I might have to wash out your mouth," he says teasingly.

This makes me pause.

"Vin?" I repeat, looking at him in confusion.

He grins.

"You're mine now," he explains. "As soon as the shadow took you, you belonged to me. Seems only fit that I rename you. I think 'Vin' fits you nicely."

I feel anger rise in me, as I meet his eyes. He is smirking, but something tells me he is dead serious.

"I don't belong to anyone," I reply, doing everything to keep my voice calm. "And if you think that you can take my name from me, I'll sell you a bridge. On the moon."

Actually, if he thinks he can do that, I'll do something lot more painful than selling him a bridge. And it'll involve pliers.

Pan simply smirks at my insults, and I'd smack him across the face if we weren't flying high enough for me to break my neck.

"Oh, Vin, you say the nicest things," he chuckles.

"Jess!" I snap. "It's Jess, Pan!"

He ignores me, as we continue to fly.

"I have to say though, I wasn't too impressed with how long it took you to find the little girl," he says. "I thought you would've been quicker."

"You already told me that, and her name is Abby," I reply. "And considering that I woke up in a random jungle, after she was abducted by a creepy shadow thing, it's pretty impressive that I was able to find her at all."

Pan smirks at this, or at least his smirk comes back again. Or maybe it just becomes more noticeable.

"I was fairly impressed, though," he continues, as if I never interrupted him at all. "with what you pulled with Felix. I knew you had potential, when you punched me, and you definitely showed it with how you dealt with him."

Felix...he probably means Scarface.

"I'll do the same to you when we've landed," I hiss. "And I hope you get a permanent bruise from that punch I gave you."

"Well, you can forget the last one," he replies without further explanation.

I can tell he wants me to ask, which is precisely why I don't. I can guess that he used magic.

I involuntarily shiver at the breeze that blows as we fly. Pan can heal himself with magic, but apparently he's fine with me dripping wet.

We arrive above a clearing, and he flies down. We land in the camp I saw earlier.

As soon as my feet are on the ground, I pull out of Pan's grip, and shove him away.

I look around, and see the boys are still playing their games, as if nothing has changed since I was here in the dream.

But a heartbeat later, everything stops, as Pan steps on top of a rock right next to him, and grabs my wrist.

"My brothers," he announces. "We here in Neverland have enjoyed its benefits, for eternity. But we all know that recently, it has been harder for us to channel the power of Neverland. As the sand in the glass of Skull Rock slowly runs through our hands, as we wait for the arrival of the Heart of the Truest Believer, the magic of Neverland has waned. You all know that it has been harder for us to create objects just by thinking of them."

I don't know what the heck he's talking about, and, frankly, I don't really care.

I pull at his grip, but he only tightens it around my wrist. Honestly, if he keeps doing this, my wrist is just going to end up as one big bruise.

"But tonight, that has all changed," he continues, sounding proud and excited. "Tonight, my brothers, we no longer have to worry about this loss. For earlier this evening, you saw that a bargain was struck. A bargain we've been waiting anticipating for many years. Tonight, in exchange for her sister's return, we have received our first Lost Girl. And not only our first Lost Girl, but the girl who will save us until we have the Heart of the Truest Believer."

He holds my wrist high in the air, so that all the Lost Boys are looking at me.

"My brothers, let us welcome our newest member, and our new sister: Vin!"

As the Lost Boys start to cheer excitedly, something tells me that I'm in more danger than their letting on.

Actually, I'm probably in more danger than I've been in my entire life.

**A/N: YEAH! GO SPURS! **

*Ahem*

If you guys have read the first two chapters before this update, you may have noticed that I edited the first and second chapters somewhat. I've added a few more personal touches to Jess's character, and I've thrown out the classroom scene completely. I realized that it just slowed things down, and it was a little unrealistic. The main point of that had been to introduce Roxanne and Dom's characters, who may not be seen as much, but they do have an impact on Jess (they are her best friends after all). I've also changed the story she's writing in the first chapter, if you want to take a look. It may look familiar. ;)

A special thanks to **Foreverisanawfullylongtime, Randombutloved11, Tatertwig45, VesperLogan12, WhisperedxNothingsx,** and **fruitylooper** for putting _Fading Away_ on story alert, and to **Foreverisanawfullylongtime, Randombutloved11, Tatertwig45, and WhisperedxNothingsx** for favoriting it. Also, thank you **VesperLogan12, sufingbandit,** and **Foreverisanawfullylongtime** for your reviews.

You guys and Tim Duncan are what keeps my computer running!


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: The fact that this is on fanfiction should tell everyone that I don't own OUAT.**

* * *

_I have to get out of here. Pan has something planned for me; he's renaming me like I'm some sort of possession, and the Lost Boys are just going along with it. I need to get out of here. _

I start to pull against Pan's grip again, but he holds on firmly.

"You're not getting out of it that easily, darling," he whispers, looking very smug.

"You sick, twisted son of a-," I start, but Pan jumps down and clamps a hand over my mouth before I can finish the insult.

"Now, now, Vin, what did we say about language?" he asks mockingly.

In answer, I twist my mouth away from his hand, and bite down on it.

_He tastes disgusting._

Pan pulls his hand away, but he and the rest of the Lost Boys laugh as I jerk my hand out of his grip (finally!).

Spitting out the bits of flesh in my mouth and wiping my tongue with my wet sleeve, I glare at Pan with a look of unrepressed hatred.

"It's Jess," I reply, angrily. "And if you think that you can keep me here with your little boy club-."

Pan just laughs even harder. I'm unable to repress a shiver at his laugh. His laugh and expression remind me of a cat cornering a mouse.

"Oh, Vin," he says. "It was the _deal_. Abby goes back home, while you come to Neverland, and become a Lost Girl."

I don't want to give away that loopholes I found earlier. I did not say I would be a Lost Girl, and I didn't say how long I'd be on Neverland. But, if I do tell him, I know he's going to see to prevent me from using the loopholes to my advantage.

_Like I'm ever going to become a Lost Girl, anyway._

"We may have made a deal, Pan," I reply instead. "But deals can be changed. Promises, however, are always kept. And I promised Abby that I'd get back to her."

Pan chuckles with some of the other Lost Boys.

I notice behind him, Scarface-or Felix, whatever he's called-sitting by the fire, a nasty smirk on his face.

"Want to know a couple of the great things about Neverland, Vin?" asks Pan.

"Jess," I correct immediately.

"There are no apologies in Neverland," he continues, as if I had remained silent. "or hurt. But what's even better, is that promises can be broken in Neverland."

I cock my head at what he said before.

_No hurt, huh? So why have I heard children crying ever since I came here?_

I don't voice this thought, though. Instead, I just start smirking as much as him.

"Not with family," I reply. "No matter where you are, family always finds you, or you always find them. No broken promises."

Pan just grins, and spreads his arms, gesturing to the camp around us.

"The Lost Boys are _your family_ now, Vin," he says, as if he's welcoming me to the Lost Boys.

_Yeah, Felix mentioned that he might say that. As if these guys are ever going to be any family of mine. _

"It's Jess," I correct.

_Honestly, if we keep correcting each other like this, it's going to get old really fast._

"And, no, my family is Abby, and my friends," I continue, crossing my arms.

"And my mom," I add as an afterthought. "My family is not a group of immature brats who haven't even started growing facial hair."

I take a stage sniff, and raise my eyebrows.

"Or learned to bathe, apparently."

Pan snorts, and I can tell he's enjoying the banter.

"Oh, Vin," he says. "I _know_ I'm going to have fun with you."

The way he says that makes me shudder. I really don't want to know what his definition of fun is. Something tells me that our definitions are very different. And that his definition is what I'd describe as gross, and/or dangerous.

I shrug as if it doesn't matter to me. I can't let him see that his words are getting to me.

"Enjoy it while you can," I say, simply. "I'm not going to be here for long."

Actually, I hope he doesn't enjoy it. That will probably mean him having fun at my expense. Something I know I don't want.

Pan simply grins.

"We'll have to see about that, won't we," he sneers, stepping closer to me. Instinctively, I back away.

Pan raises an eyebrow at my retreat. Cursing myself mentally, I force myself to stay still as he approaches.

_Don't let him know you're scared of him. Don't let him see that he's getting under your skin. _

"I will break you in the end, Vin," he murmurs in my ear, almost fondly.

I feel that twisted, dark feeling again, except it's stronger, now that he's so close. It's enough to make me feel nauseous. He grabs my wrist, and I can't stop myself from flinching. I look him in the eyes, and try to calm myself. But if he has my wrist, then he probably feels me shaking.

"And when I do break you, you will be the greatest Lost One who ever to set foot in Neverland."

_Calm. Don't let it show. Don't let him know that he's scaring you._

"It's Jess," I say cooly.

Without hesitation, I punch him with my free hand. Or at least, I try to punch him. He catches my fist, and I'm only able to catch a glimpse at his permanent smirk as he flips me over onto the ground.

For the second time-no, third-the air gets knocked out of my lungs, and I'm cursing like a sailor.

"Oh, Vin," Pan laughs, bending over me. "We _really_ will have to work on your language issues."

I'm lying on my back, and immediately try to get up.

Pan, however, lifts a foot, and presses me down. For a second, he stands, as if victorious, over me. As if he's won. I try to roll out from under him, but he simply pushes his foot down even harder.

"I think we'll start with an early bedtime," he says tauntingly, as he holds me down.

As if on cue, two boys come forward, and pull me to my feet, the second Pan gets off of me. I start to struggle, when suddenly my hands are tied in front of me. I look up at Pan, knowing that this is his work. His smirk confirms it.

_I hate him!_

I hate him so much. But I can't let him see how much he freaks me out.

"Enjoy your precious time 'breaking' me, Pan," I sneer, imitating his. "I promised Abby I would come back. That I would escape Neverland. And I always keep my promises."

Pan only snorts at this.

"Vin, I've been here for centuries," he replies. "And half of the Lost Boys here have said that. And look at them now."

As he says this, the other Lost Boys drag me towards a tree. It isn't until I see the steps hidden beneath the roots that I realize that its hollow.

"If the Lost Boys are so broken that they're happy, then why do I hear crying?" I shout, as the boys drag me into the tree.

Either Pan doesn't reply, or I don't hear it.

As the boys take me into the tree, I turn and see what looks like a small barrack in a hollow tree. Or maybe a large camp cabin, with hammocks instead of beds.

I see several boys lying there, most of them very young.

One of my holders-who I realize is Felix, leads me to a hammock, while the other starts blowing out the lanterns that give light to the tree, except for one in the corner.

I roll into the hammock without Felix's help, and use my feet to kick off my boots, in a seemingly careless way.

"Don't get too confident," Felix drawls in his monotone voice. "Peter Pan never fails."

"Well, he hasn't been up against me yet," I reply.

I need to act confident. If I act like I'm not scared, they won't know if they're winning or not. I can use that to my advantage. I need to act like I can get out of this. I can't let even a Lost Boy know that I'm really scared right now.

I shiver slightly, in my wet clothes.

"Anyway to turn up the heat in here?" I ask.

"If Pan wants you to be cold, then you'll be cold," says Felix. "Maybe you won't curse so much, now."

Part of me wonders whether Pan actually doesn't want me cursing, or if it's just his way of exerting control over me.

In reply to Felix, I mumble something unflattering about his mother, and turn on my side, closing my eyes.

It's only when I know that he and the other boy are gone, that I open my eyes, and allow my emotions to show.

I allow myself to cry.

When I was little, I cried a lot. This got Mom and Dad up to take care of me, when I would cry in the middle of the night. After I put together the pieces of why they were so grouchy the next morning, I learned to cry silently.

This became very handy when Dad left. And when I was overloaded with pressure, because Mom wasn't home, and I didn't want Abby to see.

It's handy now.

Confident that no one can hear me, I cry.

I didn't get to say goodbye to my family, and I don't know how long I'm going to be here. I know I'm not getting any older, but what about the rest of the world? Will it grow up while I'm trapped here?

And I know I swore to Abby I would escape, and that I acted confident of that in front of Pan. But the truth is, I'm scared that they will find some way to trap me permanently. Pan clearly has a plan for me, and I want to escape before he puts that plan to use.

After a few minutes of silently crying, I'm aware of something else: the crying is much, much louder. I lay still and listen.

The crying is in this room. The children who are crying are here.

That makes me feel worse. And it makes me feel even more afraid.

_What kind of horrible place is this?_

Pan won't even take care of the children who are in Neverland. He just abandons them to cry and deal with their problems on their own. I know what that feels like. It's what Mom was doing with me.

As I cry silently, I try to cover my ears with my hands, but they are tied. All I can do is listen to the cries as I wait for the sleep that never comes.

Finally, I can't bear it any longer. I turn around, and see a small boy curled up in the hammock beside me.

He's facing me, and in the dim light, I can see his eyes are full of unshed tears.

We stare at each other for a moment, and I see the tears leak out of his eyes. Suddenly, I feel my heart go out to this kid, who is obviously just as much Pan's prisoner as I am.

He looks about eight, maybe younger.

I immediately think of Abby, and where she is right now. I can't do anything to help her, except get back to her. But, at this moment, I _can_ help this kid.

I sit up a little, and smile kindly at him.

"Hey," I whisper. "Are you alright?"

_Well, duh, he's not alright! He's crying isn't he?_

But the kid only shakes his head, and starts to sob.

"What's wrong?" I ask.

He looks at me with wide eyes, as if he's never seen anything like me before.

"It's okay, you can tell me," I assure him in a soft, soothing voice. I did this with Abby when Dad left, and it seemed to work. Mom was never around to do it with me, so I can't be really sure myself.

But, something tells me that this kid is miserable, and he just needs to tell someone about it. He just needs a friend.

"I-I," he starts, but he chokes back into sobs.

I wait patiently, and don't prod him. He doesn't need pressure.

"I miss my mama," he finishes, and immediately breaks down even more.

I feel my heart tug, wanting to help this poor kid. Because I'm in the same boat at the moment.

"I miss my mom too," I whisper.

The boy looks at me, and wipes his eyes.

"You do?" he asks. I can see his big eyes looking at me, and I smile.

I nod.

"And my sister, and my best friends," I continue.

The little boy nods, as if in understanding.

"I didn't have no brothers or sisters," he whispers. "but I did have friends."

There is a loud yelp from outside the tree, and it sounds like the Lost Boys are having a great time hurting themselves.

My new friend whimpers, and looks around in the dark.

"They're just boys being silly," I assure him.

He shakes his head.

"It's not that," he whispers, sounding close to tears. "Its just that...that…"

"What?" I murmur.

"I hate the dark," he breathes, and looks wildly around, as if someone else heard.

I smile, and say, "Well that's alright. A lot of people are."

He ignores this, and seems to get a far away look in his eyes.

"My mama used to lie with me until I fell asleep," he whispers, his shoulders shaking with suppressed sobs. "She said she'd keep any monsters away, while I was asleep."

I know that now there is only one thing for me to do.

_Dang it, I can't do this!_

If I'm going to escape, I can't get attached. But I'm not going to abandon this kid when he clearly needs someone.

"Come on," I say, moving over. "You can lay with me."

His eyes light up, as if I've offered him free run of the candy store.

"Really?" he asks.

"Sure," I say. "I mean, my hands are tied, so it may be a little awkward, but-."

The boy doesn't allow me to finish. He's already in the hammock, nestled against me.

"What's your name?" he asks.

"Jess," I reply softly, sifting my tied hands, so he can be more comfortable. "Yours?"

"Toodles," he replies, just as he starts drifting off.

I want to protest that Toodles isn't a name, but it's too late. The little guy is already asleep.

And, feeling like something has actually gone alright tonight, I relax, and sleep finally finds me.

* * *

"Well, isn't that just the sweetest thing?"

I groan, and open my eyes, recognizing the voice.

Pan, Felix, and a couple other Lost Boys are grinning maliciously at me, and I shut my eyes again.

"Go away," I say sleepily.

I feel something stir against me, and I open my eyes to see Toodles lying by me, looking at me with wide eyes.

I can't help but smile a little.

"Not you, the idiot in green," I assure him, and close my eyes.

Pan laughs at this, and I hear him order Toodles to get up.

I hear Toodles whimper, but he does as he's told.

Recognizing an oncoming battle, I open my eyes, and glare up at Pan.

"Do you mind?" I ask. "I'd like my beauty sleep, if it's alright with you."

I can almost smirk in time with him.

"Time to get up, Vin," he says. "Time to train."

I think about protesting that my name is Jess, but instead, I'm going to try a different strategy.

I ignore him.

I close my eyes, and roll on my side, facing away from him.

"Come on, Vin," he coos in a baby voice. "Wakey, wakey."

I still ignore him. And that's going to continue until he starts calling me Jess.

Suddenly, I feel hands pull at the edge of the hammock, and I realize what they're doing a second too late.

The hammock flips over, and I fall to the floor.

Well, they got me awake.

Time for them to regret it.

I slowly stand up, calmly and casually, and look directly at Pan.

"Can you please cut my hands loose?" I ask cooly, but politely. Just because he thinks he can get away with being rude does not mean that I'm going to lose my dignity.

Pan clearly thinks he's won, because he's grinning as he unsheathes his dagger and cuts me loose.

But, as soon as I'm free, I sit down on the ground, cross my arms, and glare up at him, daring him to try to move me. With my hands free, he's guaranteed trouble.

He lifts his eyebrow, as if surprised.

_Seriously, is that eyebrow having spasms?_

"Still fighting, then, Vin?" he asks, sounding mockingly exasperated. I can tell by the glint in his eyes that he is enjoying this.

I give him a sweet smile.

"Who?" I ask, in a purely innocent voice.

His lips quirk as he understands my strategy.

When he called me Vin and I protested, I looked like the weak one. This way, he has to call me Jess to get me to respond. So, he has to be the one to cave in.

Rather than acknowledge this, though, he simply grabs me by the upper arm, and pulls me to my feet.

I can resist, but I know that it won't work. Not when he's holding me with his death group. I figured that out last night.

We walk outside, and I see the boys doing exactly what they were doing last night. It's as if they never went to sleep.

Pan lets go of my arm, and tosses me something. I catch an apple.

I haven't had anything to eat since last night, and I'm starved, but I still look at it suspiciously.

I wouldn't be too surprised if Pan is trying to pull some 'Snow White' stunt.

Pan catches my glance, and grins. Not a reassuring one, but one that suggests he's hiding a secret.

"Don't worry, Vin," he says. "It's not for eating."

I raise my eyebrows, and almost respond, when I remind myself that I'm ignoring him when he calls me 'Vin'.

So, instead, I shrug and carelessly toss it over my shoulder. Whatever his game is, I'm not playing it.

I see Toodles sitting not too far away, watching the scene nervously.

I smile at him reassuringly, and start to walk over to him. Or more, away from Pan.

I hear Pan snarl, and grab my arm, as he forces the apple back into my hands.

"We're going to play a little game," he says. "called Target Practice."

I glance back down at the apple, and my stomach plummets as I understand the full meaning of what he's saying. I feel panic rise inside, and it cuts off whatever banter I was thinking of.

_I haven't even been here for twenty-four hours, and he's going to_ kill _me. _

He takes an arrow and starts dipping it in a small bowl.

I bite my lip, as I realize it's poison. I've read enough to know about poison arrows. Great, they're going to be shooting at me with poisoned arrows. At least it will kill me faster.

"I once heard a story," Pan says, as he loads the crossbow. "'about a man who shot an apple off his son's head. Let's see if it's possible."

He calls over Felix, and I feel panic rising in me.

"Is he a good shot?" I ask, trying (unsuccessfully) to keep the fear out of my voice.

_Calm down_, I tell myself. _He needs you for something, remember? So, he's not going to hurt you too badly._

"Doesn't matter," he replies, grinning that secretive smile again.

_Like hell, it doesn't!_

"He's not the one doing the shooting."

Felix takes the apple out of my hand, and grins eagerly.

He places the apple on his head, and steps back, as Pan places the bow in my hands.

My mind clicks in the pieces, and I stare at Pan.

"Are you serious?" I ask, trying to figure out what game he's playing. "What if I miss?"

Meaning:_ "What will happen when I fire this thing at you?"_

"You won't miss," he replies encouragingly, grinning. "Trust yourself, Vin. It's exhilarating."

That's probably the same thing he says about flying. And after flying with him last night, I've resolved to travel by train and car for the rest of my life.

The boys start to chant, "Shoot, shoot, shoot!"

Even Pan and Felix are doing it.

I hold my arrow towards Felix, my mind racing.

I probably will miss. But I don't want to kill Felix, even if I hate him. I just don't want to kill someone. But, Pan most likely has a plan for me to hit the apple, or else the bow wouldn't be in my hands. I have never fired a bow before though. How does he know I won't miss?

Speaking of Pan...

I glance at him, and I realize he's watching me, his other hand twitching as he chants.

_Why would it twitch...oh..._

He expects me to shoot at him. And he has something planned if I do.

I don't want to shoot at Felix at the risk of hitting him. But as much as I want to fire at Pan, he has something planned if I do.

_I refuse to be his pawn. _

Instead of firing, I let the crossbow fall to my side.

"Sorry," I say, dropping it beside me, purposely keeping my voice casual. "don't really feel like shooting today."

_Or tomorrow, or the day after that, or any day after._

Pan meets my eyes, and starts to glare.

"Come on, Vin," he scoffs, "where's the fun in that?"

The fact that I've got him irritated by not letting myself be part of his game makes it pretty fun, actually. He's riled up, and I'm alright.

_Point to Jess._

I hand him back the bow.

"I don't cave into peer pressure, Pan," I reply. "And I don't like being toyed with. So, no, putting a bow in my hands, giving me a target, and telling me to shoot won't work."

He doesn't take the bow, so I set it down, shrugging.

I see Toodles watching me in amazement, and I grin.

Pan catches my smile, and smirks himself.

"So, you aren't going to be doing any shooting?" he surmises.

_Duh. _

"Maybe if you start calling me Jess, we can come to some sort of agreement," I reply, casually walking around camp.

My eyes find the bowl that they dipped the arrow in. A plan forms in my mind as I hear Pan walking up to me.

"Shame," he says. "It's quite a thrill, shooting your first arrow. I try to give all my boys that pleasure."

Oh, so now he's trying to convince me to shooting. If he's trying that, he's desperate. Really desperate.

"Well, as I showed Felix last night, I'm not a boy," I reply, smiling innocently.

I glance at Felix, who is glaring at me. Guess he didn't like that little move I pulled on him.

I could continue this banter, but I want to clear out of here fast.

Pan opens his mouth to reply, and I seize the moment.

I grab the bowl, and splash it at him in the face.

For a split second, I stop, taking in the moment. He always acts like he is somehow in control of the situation. Even when it seems like he isn't winning, he still acts like he is. This is the first time I've seen him not in control of the situation.

He steps back, sputtering and coughing, and the other boys let out cries of horror and shock. I don't know what the poison was, but apparently its bad enough to get even Pan out of his manipulative demeanor for a moment.

Knowing I have only seconds before they turn on me, I snap back into reality, and I take off out of camp as fast as my feet can carry me.

Praying they'll be too distracted with Pan, I rush back into the jungle, with no clear idea of where I'm headed.

_Well, this is certainly déjà vu. Me running through the forest, followed by lots of the Lost Boys, who are trying to hunt me down. _

Only last time, they wanted me alive. Now, seeing how I most likely killed their leader, they'll probably want to gut me like a fish.

I'm pulled from my thoughts, when something jerks me to the side, into the foliage.

I turn, ready to fight, when a hand clamps over my mouth, and another holds me against the tree.

I look down to see a boy, probably no older than fourteen.

He wears the same cloak as the rest of the Lost Boys, but I've never seen him before.

Then again, I haven't really marked all the faces of Pan's group.

I'm about to struggle when our eyes meet. I see something in them that I haven't seen in any of the other Lost Boys: fear, sadness, anxiety, and hardness. Much different from the impatient glee I've seen with the other boys.

_He's not one of them. Maybe I can trust him. _

For a moment, we both remain silent, as I hear the Lost Boys run past our hiding place.

I don't know how many, but several, by the sound of it.

We don't move a muscle, until the sounds of my pursuers has faded. But still, when I turn back to the boy, he still whispers.

"Who are you?" he asks, removing his hand over my mouth.

I meet his eyes again, and decide that for the moment, I should probably trust him.

"Jess Lancaster," I reply, also whispering. "And you are?"

"Baelfire," he replies. "But everyone calls me Bae."

* * *

**A/N: dunh, dunh, DUUUNNNHHH**

Yes, Bae has appeared, and, yes, he will play a large part in this story. I actually really enjoy writing him as a kid on Neverland, because he is not yet Neal, as we see him in OUAT, but he's no longer the little kid we see in the flashbacks. He made that transition from the kid to the adult in Neverland, and it's interesting to write that change, since we don't really know how it happened.

A special thanks to **Dreamer-Girl96, Uncommon Fairy,** and **DreamYourOwnDestiny **for putting this story on alert, and to **Yuki Uzumaki Uchiha Namikaze** and **Uncommon Fairy** for favoriting it. Also, a special thanks to my amazing beta readers, **Uncommon Fairy,** and **Can't-Escape-My-Fandoms** for pointing out what parts of Fading Away needed fixed up.

Please, read, review, favorite, follow, or whatever you guys want! My computer is running low without the Spurs playing anymore. **:)**


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer: I don't own OUAT. If I did, we'd see a lot more of Jefferson, and Graham would living and breathing. **

* * *

_Baelfire. _

The name rings a bell, but I can't remember where I heard it. But, at the moment, I can't be distracted by that. Escaping the Lost Boys before they kill me is a bigger priority, right now.

I nod at Bae, and look past the foliage, to make sure that there aren't more Lost Boys leaving camp to look for me. If I did succeed in killing Pan, then this may become a manhunt very quickly.

_Just what I need_, I think sarcastically._ I have to get out of here, and now the entire island may be swarming with Lost Boys trying to kill me. Perfect. _

For a few minutes, Bae and I wait in silence. Finally, it seems that no other Lost Boys are coming out to find me. Bae let's go of me, and steps back.

"Are you the girl they were looking for last night?" he asks, looking over his shoulder, as if waiting for more Lost Boys to appear.

"Yeah," I reply, remembering last night all too clearly.

_I only learned that a fairytale land is real, made a deal with its insane ruler to trade my freedom for Abby's, got chased by psychotic, armed kids, and learned that Peter Pan wants to break me. Makes last night a little unforgettable._

"What did you do?" he asks, looking confused.

"Last night I was just trying to get away from them," I reply with a shrug. "Just now, I may or may not have thrown a bowl of poison at Pan."

His eyes widen, and he gives me a look of half-admiration, and half-shock. I feel my lips twitch into a smile at his expression. If a bunch of Lost Boys weren't chasing me right now, I'd be laughing.

"Why does he want you?" he asks me, after he gets over his shock.

_Dang, this kid asks a lot of questions._

"I don't know," I reply, honestly. "Last night he said something about me saving the Lost Boys. He also said something about breaking me. I'm still not sure what he wants exactly, though."

_And if he wants me to save the Lost Boys, then what was the point of kidnapping Abby? Why take her when the shadow could have easily taken me?_

I hear voices in the distance, pulling me from my thoughts. Bae and I share a look. We don't know if the voices are coming towards or away from us. Either way, we can't stay here, that's for sure.

"Come on," he says, taking my hand and leading me deeper into the jungle.

"Hold on," I hiss, pulling my hand out of his grip. It's time for some questions of my own.

"How do I know I can trust you?"

I trusted him for the moment, because he clearly didn't want the Lost Boys to find him either. But this version of Neverland is definitely different from the story I know. For all I know, he could be leading me into a trap.

_He is different from the Lost Boys, though. I don't think that he's any friend of Pan. He may also be trying to get out of here as much as I am._

"Because Pan wants me too," he replies.

I raise my eyebrows, showing I don't believe his story.

"Look," he says. "I've been trying to escape Pan since I was brought here. I've hidden from him for years. If you don't want them to find you, you're going to need my help."

I weigh my options.

I can either trust this kid, and get caught by Pan, or trust him and be safe for a while.

Well, if I run, Pan will probably find me again. If he survived the poison.

_Well, if he didn't, then the Lost Boys will probably track me down anyway and kill me if I go on. I'm pretty sure this kid knows how to avoid both the Lost Boys and Pan._

"Ok, lead on," I say, nodding.

Bae nods, and leads me through the unfamiliar jungle.

We don't say a word, but just run, until we reach a large pile of rock and vines.

Bae runs over to a vine, and starts to pull.

One rock at the base of the pile moves, slowly being lifted up, so that I can see the entrance of a cave.

Bae silently motions that I enter, and I run in. Bae follows, and the rock falls shut behind us, concealing the entrance.

Bae walks to a corner, and I hear a familiar sound.

As he lights a torch, I realize it was a match striking.

I look around to see a cave, filled with drawings. A small table with bowls and jugs sit in the corner, and a bed is made up in a small alcove.

"Thanks," I say, finally sitting down.

"Don't mention it," he replies.

He sits down next to me, and I finally get a good look at him.

Brown hair and eyes, and a nice face.

_If he ever gets out of Neverland, he'll grow up nicely._

We sit in silence for a while, unsure of what to say or do.

_Besides, I have to catch my breath._

Finally, he breaks the silence.

"Did the shadow take you?" he asks.

I nod, still trying to catch my breath. Even in gym, I've never had to run this long and hard. If we did run, it was usually laps around a nice, smooth track. Not anything like Neverland.

Well, at least it's good for the endurance. I have a feeling I'm going to need it.

"That's strange," Bae says. "Pan doesn't want girls. Not permanently, anyway."

"How do you know?" I ask. "You said that you've hidden from Pan for years."

_Then again, didn't Pan say I was the first Lost Girl? Would that would mean that I'm the first girl who Pan wants to keep? Or I'm really the first girl who Pan brought to Neverland?_

Why would he take girls, anyway? He doesn't exactly seem like the womanizing type. Creepy psychopath who kidnaps girls and tries to mess with them…

_Okay, I can see that._

"I _have_ been hiding," Bae replies to my question. "But before I got taken, I lived with a family, the Darlings. The shadow took their daughter, Wendy, but brought her back after a night, because she was a girl."

My eyes widen in surprise. Did he just say what I think he said?

"Whoa, wait a second," I say, holding up a hand. "Wendy Darling? As in _the _Wendy Darling?"

Bae nods, looking confused.

"You know her?" he asks, and he actually looks hopeful. I feel my heart sink. The poor guy probably thinks that I have news of the Darling family.

"I know _of_ her," I reply. He still looks confused, so I explain further.

"There's this story in my world that I read, about Peter Pan, and Wendy, and her brothers."

"John and Michael?" he asks, nodding.

"Yeah," I reply. "Anyway, the story is a lot different from the real thing. For one, Pan wants his shadow to get reconnected to him, he's actually a pretty nice guy, and Wendy and her brothers willingly go and come back from Neverland. Can't say there's any Balefire in the story, though."

Bae shrugs.

"I was from another world," he says. "Before I met the Darlings. Guess it didn't make sense to put me in."

"Another world?" I repeat, tucking me knees to my chin.

I don't know what to think about this kid, but seeing how I'm in Neverland, and just threw poison at Peter Pan, another world seems perfectly plausible.

Bae nods, but his eyes are bitter. Again, I see that his eyes are not youthful, and mischievous, like the other Lost Boys. They're old, almost tired, yet filled with a fear, as if he'll run at the least suspicious sign.

"So, how did you meet the Darlings?" I ask.

It's not that I want to pry. But something about Bae tells me that he needs to talk about it. If he's been hanging out here for years, like he said, then he probably needs someone to tell.

_Heck, I'll probably tell him everything that happened last night when he's done._

Bae bites his lip, and looks at the far end of the wall.

"My papa wanted to protect me," he murmured, his tone a mix of anxiety yet defense. As if he's trying to make an excuse for what happened.

"He...he had seen the ogre wars," Bae continues, starting to pale. "He knew they were dangerous. So, he got the power of the Dark One through a dagger."

Wait.

The Dark One? The Ogre Wars? A dagger?

Instead of feeling shocked, or confused, it all sounds familiar. I should be looking at this kid like he's crazy, but for some reason, I feel like I know what he's talking about.

_I know this. I can't remember where right now, but I know what he's talking about. How do I know that?_

I nod, silently acknowledging Bae to continue. I'll remember where I heard it later. Right now, I should listen to him. He starts to talk more rapidly, and I can tell the memories still hurt him.

"But the power corrupted him. Twisted him. So, I tried to take us to a land without magic. A place we could be safe. But, when the portal opened, he...he…"

He cuts off, and buries his face in his hands. I guess I was right; he hasn't told anyone this in a while.

Immediately, I feel a sense of empathy and understanding.

Bae's father abandoned him. Just like Dad abandoned me, Abby, and Mom.

"I'm sorry," I say, gently. He still keeps his face in his hands, and I put an arm comfortingly around him.

"If it's any consolation," I continue, "I know how you feel."

That gets Bae looking up, and I smile with understanding.

"My dad abandoned me, my mom, and my little sister," I explain. "All for some slut who 'really got him.'"

I can't keep the bitterness out of my voice, as I say the last part. I remember every detail of the day Dad left.

I was working on algebra, when he came in and kissed me on the cheek. He had told me to be brave, and to that it wasn't my fault. I wasn't sure what he meant, so I followed him to the door. He had put a suitcase in our car, with some redhead I'd never seen before in the passenger seat. The only thing he left was an envelope filled with divorce papers.

I remember running to the car, having figured out what was going on, but he just ignored me, like I wasn't his kid anymore, and drove away. I never saw him after that, and seeing as I'm on Neverland, I'll probably never see him again.

But, I don't tell any of this to Bae. He's just looking at me curiously.

"You have a little sister?" he asks, cocking his head to the side.

I nod, remembering Abby.

"Abby," I say, unable to stop a growing smile. "Sweetest kid you'll ever meet."

"Where is she?" asks Bae. "Is she in Neverland too?"

I pause, unsure how to answer.

_Well, Bae told me his story. It seems only fair that he knows some of mine. _

"No," I reply. "No, she's safe."

I wet my lips, and look at the cave ceiling, and suddenly wish it was my bedroom ceiling. And that the cave was my home. And I could see Abby, Roxanne, Dom, even Mom, again.

Then, before I know it, I'm telling Bae everything that happened. The shadow taking Abby, waking up in Neverland, Pan's deal, the shadow taking me after returning Abby, my running from Felix, Pan catching me, renaming me, and announcing that I was the first Lost Girl.

"...And after I refused to shoot the arrow, I saw the poison, took my chances, and threw it at him," I finish, about ten minutes later.

Bae is a good listener. He didn't interrupt or ask questions throughout the story, but still listened, and nodded at some points.

"So, why would he want you?" he asks, when I'm done. "I mean, why you specifically?"

"I don't know," I reply. "I'm not even sure why he had to kidnap Abby. It seems that it would be easier to just kidnap me and avoid the trouble."

_Unless, it wasn't me specifically? He _did_ say that he only needed Abby. But if he only needed her, and had her with him, why would he make the deal to let Abby go?_

"Maybe the shadow can't tell who it's taking," Bae offers. "I mean, the shadow took Wendy, when it easily could have taken John or Michael. Then, it was going to take Michael because he was a boy, but then it took me. Maybe Pan needed you, and the shadow accidentally took Abby instead."

That sounds plausible, but if that was the case, the shadow could have returned with Abby as soon as Pan realized the mistake. I was still knocked out; it would have been easy to take me.

"Well, whatever the reason," I say. "I just want to escape before his plan actually _starts._ I'd rather get out and not know, then never escape but know what he's planning."

"Do you have any plans?" Bae asks sitting up.

I shrug.

"I've been more focused on getting away from the Lost Boys than getting out of Neverland itself," I admit sheepishly. "I guess I'd try finding the shadow; make it take me back."

_Really, _I think to myself. _That's the best you got? The shadow took Abby and you without hesitation, and it seems to only follow Pan. You really think that it will just bring you back because you ask it to?_

"That won't work," Bay says, confirming what I was thinking. "I've tried using the shadow before. I've tried asking, trapping it, forcing it. Nothing really works."

I raise my eyebrows in surprise, and sit up a little, myself. The fact that he's been able to face the thing is an accomplishment in of itself.

"So, any suggestions on how to escape?" I ask. "You seem to be the expert."

Bae shrugs, like it's no big deal.

_The kid was brave enough to try to trap _the shadow_. If there's someone who would have any ideas how to escape, it's Bae. _

"Pan told me that no one gets off the island without his permission, but I've been trying for ages," he explains, modestly. " I've come kinda close a couple of times, but clearly haven't succeeded. But, if you want to help, or if you have any ideas..."

I smile, and stand up as he trails off. It seems I have a partner.

_Which I really need, since I've drawn a blank on how to escape for a while. Granted, I was more focused on escaping the Lost Boys, but still…_

I answer my mouth to reply, when Bae suddenly tenses.

Instinctively, I do so also, and listen.

Outside the cave, are footsteps.

"Vinnnn."

The call comes from a hatefully familiar monotone voice.

"Come out, come out, wherever you are," Felix calls.

I can hear similar calls around the cave, and my heart plunges to my stomach.

The Lost Boys have found our hideout.

I feel the panic rise within me, and I shove it aside.

_Okay, Jess,_ _think!_

_They're looking for me, but they aren't looking for Bae. So, logically, they don't know that Bae is with me. So, I can escape, and lead them away from Bae._

I turn to Bae, keeping my voice quiet. Even though the stone probably muffles everything, I still don't want to risk anything.

"Is there another way out of here?" I whisper.

Bae nods, and points to a corner of the cave. On closer inspection, I see some sort of large fox tunnel, that I could easily crawl through.

_Perfect._

"Stay here," I order, running to the tunnel.

I can easily crawl out, and with the right distraction, I can get their attention. Or at least lead them away from Bae.

I don't know why I'm so keen on making sure he's safe, but I get the feeling that the Lost Boys will punish anyone helping me.

I feel a fleeting hope that Pan is dead from the poison, but I can't focus on that.

Just as I start to crawl through, I hear Bae's "Wait!"

I get out of the tunnel, and look at him. His face is full of apprehension, reflecting my own.

"You're not giving yourself up!" he says insistently.

"Of course not," I reply, trying to be brief. I don't know how long we have until the Lost Boys figure out how to get into the cave.

"I'm leading them away."

"No," says Bae, stubbornly. "I won't let you put your life on the line for me."

_I really don't have time for this. _

"Look," I explain, an edge in my voice. "I'll lead them away from here, but find a way to lose them. I did it last time, and I can do it again. Then, I'll come back here. If they catch me, then you're still safe."

Bae takes a firm stance, and shakes his head.

_Oh, for crying out loud! _

I'm trying to keep this guy safe.

Well if he can be stubborn, so can I.

I punch him in the face. I feel kind of bad for it, but I'm low on time.

_Desperate times call for desperate measures._

The punch is enough to knock him down, and may knock him out. I don't know. I just scamper through the tunnel, and hope he's not stupid enough to try and follow. If he does, we're both dead.

I pause at the mouth of the tunnel, listening if there are any boys nearby.

Nothing.

As quietly as possible, I creep out of the tunnel, and stand. I see a couple of boys, not too far, immediately duck behind a tree. There are maybe four or five, Felix being one of them.

_Great._

Looking around, I find a rock about the size of my palm. That should work.

Picking it up, I stand, and throw it as far as I can.

The boys all immediately turn to where the rock landed.

"Yes, come on," I breathe. "Take the bait."

A few take off in the general direction, while Felix and the rest follow slowly, not looking convinced.

I exhale as they all disappear through the trees, and take off in the opposite direction.

Only this time, I try to be much quieter, and much stealthier. This time, they're out for blood.

_And to think that I used to think running was the most boring sport in the world. I'm kind of taking that back, now._

I run through the jungle, when I realize that I'm on rocky ground.

_Good, that'll make me harder to track, without footprints in the dirt._

Following the rock, I realize the foliage is becoming less dense, and the sunlight becomes more prominent.

My pace quickening, I burst out of the forest, and out to a cliff.

It has what looks like a fifty foot drop, which is nothing compared to the flight I took with the shadow and Pan last night. The cliff seems to overlook some sort of cove, with aquamarine water. The water is so clear, so perfect.

I want to dive in. I want to swim in it.

_Maybe I will..._

_Snap out of it, Jess!_  
Shaking my head, I look around, and smile at the fact that there aren't any Lost Boys nearby.

_Good._

I take in the sunlight, for just one more moment, and turn to disappear into the forest. I can't stay out in the open for too long.

That's when I hear a _zing,_ and a blade is held against my throat.

"Now, what's a nice lass like you doing in a bad place, like this?" asks someone with an Irish accent.

I close my eyes, and groan.

"You've got to be kidding me," I mutter.

* * *

**A/N:** So, who is holding Jess at a sword point? Where has she heard about Balefire and the Dark One? What does Pan want with Jess? Send reviews with your guesses!

Thank you **LoveFollowsMe,** **meguhanu,** and **merli99 **for putting this story on alert, and **merli99** and **Ashlyn Huang** for favoriting it. Also, thank you **Dreamer-Girl96,** **meguhanu**, and **surfingbandit** for your awesome reviews. And, of course, a special thanks to my amazing beta-readers, **Uncommon Fairy** and **Can't-Escape-My-Fandoms.** You guys are great!

Please review, favorite, follow, or whatever you want. You keep my computer running! **:) **


	6. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer: If I owned OUAT, I'd be bragging about it instead of putting in a disclaimer.**

* * *

I open my eyes, and look at the man holding a sword against my throat. He looks to be in his late twenties or early thirties, with dark hair, a scruffy beard, and a long, leather coat.

With him, are maybe five men, who are all dressed in a similar style: cotton trousers, boots, and dirty shirts, with vests or coats. One of his men, who is wearing a knitted, bright red hat, looks kind of twitchy.

I meet the eyes of the man who is holding me at sword point. His blue eyes are suspicious, but curious, like he isn't sure what to make of me.

"Answer the question, lass," he orders. His tone tells me that he's not joking around. He really wants me to tell him what I'm doing here.

_Oh, I'm just running away from the wild boys who are after my blood for killing their leader. You really shouldn't kill me. _

_Yeah, _I think sarcastically, _this guy will love that. _

Instinctively, I raise my hands, showing that I'm unarmed.

"I'm taking in the sights," I answer, my voice dripping with sarcasm. "Lots of lovely nature spots in Neverland."

He arches an eyebrow at this, obviously not believing me. Maybe my sarcastic tone gave it away.

"Is she one of his?" asks the twitchy one, nervously.

_'She' is right here, you know. _

I can only guess the guy means Pan. Normally, I'd launch into an explanation of how I'm definitely not Pan's. However, I've been running from Pan and the Lost Boys for a while. I'm tired, and dirty. I haven't had anything to eat in hours. I have one guy holding a sword at my throat, while the other is acting like I'm not here.

_I'm having a bad day; I can be annoyed._

"I'm not a Lost Boy, if that's what you mean," I say, not bothering to hide my annoyance . "The fact that I'm a girl should make that pretty obvious."

_Honestly, is it that hard to figure out? I thought they were called the Lost _Boys_ for a reason._

"Yet you're wearing a hood like Pan's minions," points out the one in leather, who is clearly the leader.

_That's what's bothering him? Seriously?_

"It's a disguise," I explain, exasperated. "Unless they look closely they only see another Lost Boy. I don't allow them to get close enough to look, so they ignore me for a bit. Long enough to get away."

I glance back down at the sword, and shoot a look at the one holding it.

"Now, will you put that thing away?" I snap.

The man actually smiles a little, and removes the sword from my neck.

As he sheathes it, I realize that his left hand is missing. Instead, there's a hook.

My eyes widen, as I realize who these guys are.

Captain Hook, arch nemesis of Peter Pan, who often tries to kill him and his Lost Boys.

_Oh. Crap._

"You alright, love?" asks Hook, noticing my look.

I open my mouth, but don't say anything.

_What do I do? Scram, and hope he won't follow? Try to bargain with him? Jump off the cliff?_

No, I've got to calm down. He believes me to not be one of Pan's club, or at least that I'm harmless. He _probably_ won't hurt me.

"Yeah," I reply, trying to keep my voice steady. It's not exactly working.

He'll want some explanation, but I can't reveal that I know about him. That will probably make him believe I'm in the league with Pan. It would make more sense than the idea that I read about him in a book.

"It's just that, well…"

I gesture to the hook.

Hook looks down, and nods in understanding.

"Don't worry, lass, I won't use it on you," he assures me, his tone slightly joking.

_That's not entirely what I meant, but good to know._

"So, if you're not one of Pan's, then who are you?" asks his twitchy friend.

I can only assume he's Mr. Smee, Hook's best friend and first mate.

"Jess," I reply. "Jess Lancaster."

"And how did you come to this island, Jess?" asks Hook.

"The shadow took my little sister," I explain. "It knocked me out when I tried to rescue her. I woke up in Neverland, somehow, in my dreams. Pan had her, but he offered a trade: me for my sister. I took it, and the shadow brought me here, last night. I've been trying to get out ever since."

I'm surprised at how nonchalant my tone is. One would think I'd be hysterical, or at least still shocked that Neverland alone is real.

I decide not to tell him about Bae, or how Pan has a plan for me. I don't want to see Bae hurt, and if he realizes that I have some value to Pan, he may take me hostage, or use me as a bargaining chip. That's the last thing I need.

The Hook nods at my story, but Smee looks unhappy.

"Captain, if Pan wants her, he may be willing to-," he starts, still acting like I'm not here. Hook cuts him off with a look.

_Wait, is he saying that Pan may be willing to trade a favor for me? _

I want to run and attack the guy for suggesting what I think he is, but if Hook agrees, it may be better to run back into the forest. Better to be on the run than a hostage of Captain Hook, and later put back into Pan's custody.

"Now, Smee, where's your sense of honor?" asks Hook, almost sounding disappointed. "Trading an innocent girl for a favor? Bad form."

I feel a tiny bit of hope, as I look at Hook. He seems to be more respectable than Pan, at least.

_And, he still has that sense of good form from the book. Thank God for that. _

"Y-You won't hand me over to Pan?" I ask, a smile creeping on my face.

He nods, and I feel relief sweep through me for the first time since I came on Neverland.

I know he won't hurt me, and won't use me as a hostage. I somehow know that I can trust him, for the moment.

"He's lying."

I whirl around, recognizing the voice all too well.

Pan is standing at the edge of the clearing, grinning.

_He just refused to die, could he? He _had_ to stick around to toy with me._

"What?" he asks, catching my expression. "Did you think I was dead?"

"I was hoping," I reply through clenched teeth.

"Oh, you're angry now, Vin," he says, sounding excited. "That's good. You're more fun when you're angry.'

"It's Jess, Pan," I correct, short of shouting. "Get that in your thick skull!"

He smirks at this, and I curse myself mentally.

_He's having fun with this. He likes manipulating me, and it's easier to do that when I'm angry. _

So, while I ball my hands into fists, I wipe my face of emotions, and settle for a cool glare.

I catch Hook's chuckle at my insult. I notice that Smee is looking like I'm about to run over his cat, while Hook just looks amused.

Pan turns his gaze to Hook, and I catch the cocky look in his eye.

That gets me angrier, but I hold my temper.

_I can't let him know that he's getting under my skin._

"So, Killian," he says, almost conversationally. "returning my property?"

I have to grit my teeth so hard, that I almost chip my tooth.

_His property?!_

_No, I have to hold my ground. He's trying to get me riled up, so he can manipulate me. _

_I'm no one's property, _I remind myself. _I am my own person. And no cocky bastard in green is going to take that away. _

To his credit, Hook remains perfectly calm. He even wears a self-satisfied grin. I'm not sure if that should worry me or not.

"From what I can tell, she's no one's property," he replies, in the same conversational tone. "In fact, she was extremely vocal about it."

Silently thanking him, I decide to go ahead and like Hook.

"Oh?" says Pan, raising an eyebrow. "And did Vin tell you that she has already settled in to the Lost Ones?"

"If that means throwing a bowl of poison at you, then no," I interject, getting my own small smirk. "How did that medicine taste?"

He gives me a slight glare, and I can't help but smirk even more. Okay, I'm starting to see why he likes it so much. It's fun to do it when you're in control.

_Yeah, so I may not be in control right now. But, still, it's fun._

"Like honey," he replies, smoothly. But I can see the look in his eyes.

_Liar. _

"You know, that's the first time I've not seen you not in control," I say, mocking his confident tone. "Is it possible that I actually surprised you?"

"Oh, I like you, lass," says Hook, giving me a look of respect. "Not every day someone surprises Pan, especially a girl."

"Being a girl gives me a distinct advantage," I reply, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"And yet, it doesn't prevent the captain from handing you over to me," says Pan, as if trying to steer the conversation back on topic.

_Yes, I've really got him riled up! Point to Jess._

"If that were the case, then why am I still here?" I ask, challengingly.

"Lass," says Hook, warningly.

I catch a glimpse at his face, and I feel a sinking feeling. It isn't guilty, but it it is wary.

"Don't goad him," says Hook, in the same warning tone. "He'll take it all the way."

At this Pan chuckles, and I see the glint in his eyes.

Instinctively, I step back towards Hook.

I must be insane. I think I'm safer with Captain Hook than with Peter Pan.

_Boy, did that Disney movie get things wrong._

I catch a flicker of movement behind the trees out of the corner of my eye. I look back at the area a little more closely, I see a group of boys, hidden in the trees. A lot of boys.

_So Pan has brought reinforcements. And there's only seven of us, if you count Smee. There's no way we can take them. _

For a split second, Pan sees where I'm looking. His eyes meet mine, and I can tell the knows about the other boys. Now, he's going to use them.

I'm about to yell a warning, but Pan is too fast. He gives a shout, "Come on, boys" and the boys emerge from the trees, with wild warrior cries.

Hook draws his sword, and I jump back towards him, but the Lost Boys aren't focused on me or Hook. They instead surround the other pirates, and hold swords, knives, and spears to their throats.

Pan looks on with a dark, smug look.

"Right, then, Killian," he says, almost cheerfully, as he turns to look at Hook. "I think the situation is pretty clear. Hand Vin over, and you'll get your men back."

_Something's up about this. _

Pan has us surrounded. He even has a couple of Lost Boys standing beside him, watching lazily (and, yes, one of them is Felix). He could easily take me away by force. So why is he insisting that Hook hand me over?

Hook looks warily at his men, and then back at me. I realize that he doesn't want to do it. But he has to. What man wouldn't hand over a girl he just met minutes ago, to save his crew?

"Very bad form, Pan," he mutters, trying to make light of the situation.

"I'll do whatever it takes to get back what belongs to me," replies Pan, grinning.

"Why not take me by force then?" I ask, voicing my thoughts. "You could easily drag me off, so why are you making Hook hand me over?"

Hook looks slightly surprised, as does Pan.

"What?" I ask, taking in their glances.

"Hook?" repeats Pan, raising an eyebrow. "Is that what you call him?"

I'm confused. Isn't that what everyone calls him? Captain Hook, of The Jolly Roger?

"Why not?" I ask, shrugging my shoulders.

"It's not bad, Captain," says Pan, glancing at Hook. "I think it suits."

_Wait, wait, wait._

_Is he saying that nobody has called the most well-known pirate in fiction by the name everyone knows him by? That I just gave _Captain Hook _his nickname? _

I feel a little proud, but more amused that after all this time, when there was a _book_ written with the name Captain Hook, he hasn't been called that yet.

_Right, getting off topic._

"You still haven't answered my question," I point out.

Pan smiles, setting up an intentionally fake façade of trustworthiness.

"You need to learn, Vin," he explains, his voice almost affectionate, "on Neverland, the only people you can trust, are me and the Lost Boys. Your family."

_Oh, so that's his game. _

Another mind game to make me think that I can trust no one but him. To make me give in, by believing I can only trust the Lost Boys. To make me eventually believe that, for the right price, everyone here will betray me.

"Well,_ Hook_?" asks Pan, purposely emphasizing the pirate's new nickname.

_That name will go down in pirate history. And I just gave it too him._

I glance at him apologetically, in case he doesn't like the nickname, but he seems fine with it. If anything, he seems to be squirming with indecision. Because he doesn't want to do it.

Suddenly, I smile, for several reasons.

For one, I know that Hook doesn't want to hand me over. He needs to because of Pan's hostages he will, but he's still reluctant. He doesn't want to betray me.

And if he doesn't want to betray me, I can trust him.

Second, now I also know that Pan doesn't know about Bae. If he did, he'd be trying to convince me that I couldn't trust him either.

And, finally, because Pan made a mistake. In his attempts to get me to trust him, he has given me an ally. He meant for Hook to betray me, but I now know that I can trust Hook, and not Pan. He slipped up without knowing it.

He made the first mistake, not me.

For all of his and the Lost Boy's talk about Peter Pan being invincible, he made the first mistake in this fight.

He isn't invincible at all. He can be beaten.

Which means, I can win against him. I can escape Neverland.

I won't let Hook go through the guilt of handing me over. I give a quick glance at the cliff we're standing on, and subtly step closer to the edge.

"It's not a bad game," I say cheerfully, excited my new realizations. "You are trying to get me to have trust issues.

"The problem is: I know that Hook is trustworthy now. But, that's more of a problem for you. I now trust Hook much more than I trust you."

I see realization creep into Pan's face, and excitement becomes elation.

_I've beat him at this one. Point to Jess. _

My gut tells me to get out of here before he tries to capture me or kill Hook's men. But I can' help but make one last comment.

"I also want you to know that you and your minions are pretty pathetic when it comes to chasing me. I've escaped you guys no less than _twice_ in twenty-four hours, and I'm about to do it again, you warthog faced buffoon. Have a nice day!"

Giving him one last grin and a mock bow, I turn around, run, and jump off the cliff towards the crystalline water.

Several things happen at once as I fall.

For one, I'm flying through the air for seconds, giving out something between a whoop of joy, and a cry of shock at what I just did.

It's not that I'm scared of falling. There was a nadatorium with a high dive where I learned to swim, and this cliff is taller, but it's the same as going off the dive.

It's more that I just jumped _off the cliff_ that surprises me.

Another thing that happens is I hear Pan crying, "NO!" as I fall. I'm not sure what to make of that. But if I've done something that he doesn't want, then I'm alright with it, whatever it is.

And, lastly, I hear Hook's laughter ringing out, which makes me feel even better.

_I've done something that Pan doesn't want. Great!_

I'm pulled from all these thoughts when I hit the water. For a second, I sink towards the bottom, but then I slow, and easily swim to the surface.

I gasp, taking in the air as I break the surface, and look up.

Hook and Pan are standing at the edge, their gazes fixed on me.

"She has spirit. I can see why you like her," says Hook, teasingly.

I hear Pan snarl, and I take that as my cue to dive under the water again.

I don't want him flying down and pulling me out when I'm near the surface.

The water is so clear that I can open my eyes, and see where I'm going as I swim.

I make my way towards the side, where I can climb onto dry ground and run.

I feel some resistance around my upper arms as I swim, and realize that my jacket is slowing me down in the water.

I pause to shrug it off.

It's so buggy in Neverland, I probably won't even need it.

I continue to swim, but hear no sign of Pan pursuing me.

_Have I done it? Have I escaped him again? _

I honestly think the exit had been a little cocky, but I was making it up as I went along. Plus, I realized that Pan had made a big mistake, and that was making me giddy.

I resurface for a brief second for air, when I feel something move under me.

Before I can look down, and register what, I feel a clammy hand grab my ankle, and jerk me under the water.

I immediately struggle, one foot squirming, the other kicking at the hand that holds me. I look down as I'm doing this, and let out a yelp of surprise that comes out as a bubble.

I'm being pulled down by a mermaid. A real, living, blonde mermaid, with a shimmering aquamarine tail, and a triumphant grin on her face.

The grin gets me to snap out of my shock, and I resume my kicks and struggles.

_I've just escaped Peter Pan himself, and befriended Captain Hook, before taking a fifty foot plunge off a cliff. I will not go out drowned by a psycho mermaid!  
_She grabs my other foot as I'm kicking, and pulls me down further, ignoring my struggling.

I feel my lungs burning, needing oxygen, and it's all I can do not to exhale. I do that, and I'm done for.

My kicking has subsided a little, as we go deeper, and I'm simply struggling to hold in what little air I have left, but the mermaid still keeps a death grip on my ankles.

_Why? Why is she so intent on drowning me? _

That's probably my last clear, and conscious thought I'll ever have.

_No, I can't drown. I've come...too far...need to...Abby…_

Everything seems to fade to black, and I know it's the end.

Something has changed, and I can't register what. All I feel is me slipping away, into the airless, cold, dark.

Suddenly, I'm aware of one thing that's around me: _air._

I gasp, taking in as much of it as I can.

I have no idea where I am, or what's going on, but am simply intent on filling my empty lungs. I'm vaguely aware that I'm on solid ground, and I roll over, coughing and gasping.

A hand is over my chest, firmly pushing and relaxing on my ribcage, helping me get my breathing pattern back to normal.

For a few minutes, I'm fighting a battle to refill my lungs.

Finally, I feel my lungs working properly again, and take long, slow breaths.

_Inhale, exhale. Inhale, exhale. _

I lay my head down on what feels like solid rock, and close my eyes, allowing myself to give in to the exhaustion that has flooded through me.

"That's it, Vin," a voice murmurs. "Rest."

Before I pass out, I register whose voice it is, but I'm asleep before I can even feel fear.

* * *

**A/N: So the storm clouds gather...**

Yes, Hook has made his appearance, and like Bae, he will be playing a big role in the story. But, unlike Bae, I don't enjoy writing Hook because of the character development. I love writing Hook because-well, he's Hook. He's awesome.

Thank you **FurySaidtoaMouse**, **AngelofDeath1231**, **Kuroppoi Kitsune**, **julseykins,** **nobodyinamerica**, and **stygge-ulven **for putting Fading Away on story alert, and thank you **AngelofDeath1231, julseykins,** and **nobodyinamerica **for favoriting it. Also, a special thanks to **meguhanu, julseykins, Uncommon Fairy,** and **Brenna** for your awesome reviews. And, of course, a special thanks to my amazing Betas, **Uncommon Fairy,** and **Can't-Escape-My-Fandoms.**

Please review, follow, favorite, or whatever you want. You guys are keeping my computer running! **:)**


	7. Chapter 7

**Disclaimer: Yes, I own OUAT! Just try to prove me wrong!**

* * *

Peter watched over Vin for a moment before he stood, telling himself to stay calm. Rash anger would make him lose control. Calm, controlled anger gave him an edge over his opponents. It gave him an advantage in the game.

Still, that had been too close. Far too close.

He doubted Vin knew that she was diving into Mermaid Lagoon when she jumped off the cliff, or she wouldn't have jumped.

_Unless_, he thought. _I've pushed her too hard. If she is already trying to kill herself…_

No, he hadn't pushed her that far yet. She had only been in Neverland for less than a day, and he had no doubt in her resolve to return to her little sister.

Part of him hoped that her resolve would last. He had not had this good of a game in breaking a Lost One for ages. And it was always the ones with the most spirit that were the most loyal. Felix had taken him almost two years to break. Rufio broke only slightly sooner than his brother. That was centuries ago. Now, he never doubted either brother's loyalty for a moment.

But, no matter how much fun he had, he needed to tread carefully with Vin. He had plenty of time left to break her, but he had to make sure that he also had her unwavering loyalty, should the time ever come.

If his plan worked, that is.

But, he'd be lying if he didn't admit that he enjoyed this game they were playing. When he had kidnapped the little girl, he was hoping that Vin would not be like Wendy. Wendy had been in awe for about half an hour, then realized that Neverland wasn't the perfect dreamland she had imagined. It was, in many ways, the complete opposite.

She had cried, whined, and struggled. She got boring very quickly. She hadn't changed when she came returned to Neverland.

After she came back, Peter had resolved not to bring any girls to the island. They talked too much. He wouldn't have kidnapped the little girl, or brought Vin to the island if he didn't have too. As soon as he saw the little girl in tears, he thought he was bringing another Wendy to the island.

Vin, however, had proven to be stubborn, and relatively good at hiding her fear. He could see her fear of him in her eyes, but she was good at covering it, otherwise

And her ploy with the bowl of Dream Shade? Wonderful!

And throwing herself off a cliff?

Well, may have been stupid, but at least she had spirit.

Had he met her the first time he was a boy-when he as a blacksmith's apprentice-he would have been smitten by her.

But he didn't love in Neverland. He had friends in the Lost Boys, but he didn't love them. Love of any kind, especially any romantic love, would make him grow up. Love made one mature, develop. Grow up.

Besides, it would bring back the feelings he had once had for Esme', his wife, and their son, Rumple-

_No, he wouldn't think about Rumple! He had given him up. When he did, he had become a boy. A boy can't have a child as old as Rumple. And Peter was still a boy. Therefore, Rumple couldn't be his son._

He had told himself this almost religiously for three hundred years. It was now a habit. It still didn't take away the pang of guilt he had taught himself to ignore, though.

Pulling himself out of his thoughts, he looked back at Vin. She seemed to be alright, but she was out like a candle.

He stood, and unsheathed his dagger.

If Vin died before the time came, then all of this would be for naught. And he really didn't want it to end so fast. He loved playing with her.

But the mermaids needed to know exactly what happened when they messed with his toys.

He dove underneath the water, leaving Vin on the shore.

He doubted she'd wake and run before he was done, but if she did, it would just add to the game.

He swam through the lagoon, towards the underwater cave beneath the cliff.

When he first came to Neverland, a mermaid had kissed him when he flirted with her. A kiss from a mermaid ensured that the receiver of the kiss would never drown. Maybe he should have one kiss Vin, in case she pulled anymore stunts like this.

Swimming into the cave, he saw dozens of mermaids, swimming around him, within the cave.

He turned to one on the edge, a dark-haired one with silver-blue eyes.

_"Where is she?"_

The words came out as bubbles. Luckily, the mermaids could understand any talk underwater. And they knew who he was referring too.

She looked at him fearfully, and pointed a trembling hand towards the back of the cave.

He followed her point, and saw the mermaid who had almost drowned his toy. Her gaze met his, and he smirked at the fear creeping onto her face. He swam towards her, ready to pursue if she fled, but she seemed to be frozen with fear. It was pathetic, really.

"Please," she begged, her voice somehow understandable underwater. "I thought that she and you were...were...I couldn't let anyone be with you, Peter!"

He paused, and would have burst out laughing if he weren't so intent on seeing her punished.

She had thought that he and Vin were in love? Hardly. That would ruin the entire point of giving up his son.

_He wouldn't think about Rumple!_

He ignored the pang of guilt, and focused on his task. Without saying anything, he stabbed her in the stomach. Nowhere that would kill instantly, but in a place that would either kill her painfully and slowly, or let her live in constant agony if her sisters somehow saved her.

He really didn't care if she lived or not. His message was made clear. Vin would be safe from the mermaids, in the future.

Swimming out of the cave, and resurfacing, he saw that Vin's body wasn't there.

Smirking at this new part of the game, he swam to the shore, and looked on the sand for tracks.

Two sets of footprints, one set that was all over the place, as if someone had been stumbling around, while the other supported them.

Vin.

Well, she was definitely resilient, he'd give her that.

* * *

When I open my eyes, I'm not sure where I am. My eyes are open, but it still feels like I am asleep.

For a few minutes, I lay there, staring uncomprehendingly at the ceiling above me. Ever so slowly, my senses come back to me, as I take in everything.

I'm wrapped in a warm blanket tightly, like a cocoon. My bed isn't that soft, but it's not a hammock.

_Good. If it was, that would me I'd be back in Pan's camp. _

There's light, but no sunlight at all. Just candlelight.

_How long have I been out?_

Slowly, the memories come back to me. I had met Captain Hook, and had jumped off the cliff. I was being drowned by a mermaid, when someone pulled me out.

_Pan._

I immediately sit up, and whip my head around. I may not be in the Lost Boy's tree, so why is Pan keeping me here?

"You're awake," says a relieved voice.

I look and find a familiar boy standing up from a coconut shell, letting out a sigh of relief.

"Bae?" I ask, uncomprehendingly.

_I left him in the cave. What are we doing here?_

I pause, and take in the rest of my surroundings. We're in his cave.

_So how did I end up here?_

"How," I start, but Bae gets up, and starts to explain.

"After you ran, I waited until they were gone," he says. "When they were, I followed your tracks to the cliffs above Mermaid Lagoon. I saw the pirate attack you, and I was going to go out and help, but he lowered his blade, so I figured you were all right.

"I didn't want to be seen by him, but then Pan came, and you jumped off the cliff. I knew what was down in the lagoon, so I followed you. I saw Pan pull you out of the water, but then he dived in himself. So I took you back here."

_Well, isn't he quite the hero?_

I notice the makings of a bruise on his cheek, where I punched him, and I feel a pang of guilt.

"Sorry, about that," I say, gesturing to his cheek.

He touches it gingerly, and shrugs.

"You were trying to look after me," he replies.

His look becomes more serious.

"Just...don't ever pull a stunt like that again," he orders.

I raise my eyebrows, and give him a surprised, yet challenging look.

"And how are you going to stop me?" I ask, smiling teasingly.

"Pan wants you for something," Bae insists. "He wouldn't bring you here, unless he did. And whatever Pan wants, it can't be good. You can't be risking your life and run, because then Pan will catch you, and he will put his plan for you into action."

I feel a little touched that this kid cares so much, but I can't help but wonder why he cares so much.

_Probably because he can't stand Pan winning. _

I can't stand the idea either, and I've been here for less than twenty-four hours.

_I think._

"How long was I asleep?" I ask, slowly climbing out of the small alcove that makes up his bed.

Just this small action make me dizzy, and I mentally tell myself to take it even slower.

"Maybe four or five hours?" Bae replies, shrugging. "It's hard to say. Time stands still in Neverland. You forget about it after a while."

"I know you don't age," I point out. "But can't you count how many days you've been here?"

Bae glances at a side of the wall that I hadn't noticed before.

It's covered with tally marks, with at least a year's worth.

"You _have_ been keeping track," I note, looking at the wall.

"I _did_," corrects Bae. "But after a while, you just give up keeping count. And its kind of impossible to know exactly how many days have passed."

I give him a questioning look, and he continues.

"Pan controls what time of day it is. Time stands still, so you can't really count hours, or minutes. So, sometimes he'll make it night for what feels like weeks, while other times, he'll make it seem like a regular day and night, or sometimes he'll just throw in a few hours of one."

I nod, seeing why it would be impossible to count time. I'm not aging, I'm literally living in the exact second I was taken to Neverland. Time will move around Neverland, but we stay still.

A horrible thought occurs to me. Abby, Mom, and Roxanne all aging, growing old, and dying without me near them. While I stay seventeen, they grow up and die.

I try to focus on something else, something more cheerful, but all I can think about is Abby, growing into a beautiful woman, and then an old one. And I'm not there with her.

"Are you okay?" asks Bae.

"Fine," I lie, still staring off into space.

Bae clearly doesn't buy it, but shrugs, and stands up.

"Want something to eat?" he asks. "Because I'm starved, and-."

Suddenly, I tense, at a familiar feeling.

Like something is looking me up and down, analyzing me. And a twisted feeling, like darkness radiating from something.

The shadow.

"Bae," I murmur, trying to sound casual. I can't let it know that I know that it's here. "We have to get out of here."

Bae turns to me, looking surprised, when he suddenly tenses to.

"Don't look behind you," he mutters. "Just come towards the torch-light."

_It's right behind me then. Come to take me back to Pan._

My memory flashes of last night, how I told Abby to come to me, and the shadow still took her. Breathing slowly, I move at snail's pace towards the torchlight. Suddenly, before I can say or do anything, the shadow launches itself, not at me, but at _Bae_.

There's a horrible ripping sound, and Bae cries out in agony.

He's trying to jerk away from the shadow, as it pulls at something. I realize it's another shadow, but this one has the same shape as Bae.

Adrenaline pumps through me, and I grab the torch from the wall.

"Get away from him!" I cry, swinging the torch at the shadow.

It lets out a strange, horrible wail, and recoils from the fire.

"Back! BACK!" I shout, thrusting the torch closer at it.

The shadow let's go of what it was holding onto, and backs away.

_Finally._

It feels good to be in control of something. For a minute, I'm not the helpless one. The thought scares me a little, but I shove it aside.

"Tell Pan that if he wants to get me," I snarl at the shadow. "He should find me himself, not send his minions after me!"

Bae's panting beside me, and I look down at him, making sure that the torch is between the shadow and I.

"Are you alright?" I ask, nervous.

I'm not sure what the shadow was doing, but it sounded painful.

"Yeah," he replies, even though he looks anything but fine.

I turn to look back at the shadow, ready to either charge it with the torch, or tell it to scram, when it points to the torch. The flame flares up, at least five feet high, and I drop the torch in shock. As soon as I drop it, the flame goes out, plunging me, Bae, and the shadow into darkness.

"Bae?" I call, feeling down beside me.

"Here," he replies, grabbing my arm. "We need to get to the tunnel, Jess!"

I start to nod when I remember that he can't see me.

"Okay," I reply, and we stumble through the dark.

I look around my surroundings, trying to find the shadow's glowing eyes. If it comes near, I don't know how we're going to be able to fight it. The hairs on the back of my neck stand on end, and I sense that something is very, very wrong.

I realize that, that something is behind me.

I turn, expecting to see the glowing eyes of the shadow, but I see none.

Instead, an all too familiar voice hiss in my ear, "I'm right here, Vin."

I cry out, and instinctively shove my elbow back. It falls through the empty air, and I hear a dark chuckle.

"Jess?" calls Bae, uncertainly.

"Missed me, Vin."

Pan's voice comes from beside me, and I raise my free hand to swat at him. Again, I miss.

"I'm here, Vin."

Behind me.

"No, I lied, I'm here."

In front of me.

"Right here, Vin."

From the other side of the cave.

I feel panic seep through me, and my breath quickens at his taunts. He's found me. And he's coming to take me.

"Stop it, Pan!" shouts Bae. "Leave her alone."

I feel a bit of relief that Bae can hear him too, and it's not just me.

"Vi-in," calls Pan, in a soft, sing-song voice. "Come and find me, Vin."

I try to ignore his voice, and I feel the cave wall.

"Bae, I've found the wall," I mutter, excitedly. "We can follow it out."

"Not unless I find you first."

Pan's voice is literally a hair's breadth away from me.

I nearly scream, turn around, and try to hit him.

But he's gone. And I've lost my handhold on Bae.

"Bae?" I call, urgently. "Bae, where are you?"

"Here." Bae's voice comes from the darkness, somewhere in front of me.

I stumble forwards blindly, towards his voice, and feel someone in front of me.

"Bae?" I hiss, uncertainly.

"Right here," replies the person.

Feeling another hint of relief, I reach out, and take hold of him. Immediately, I let go, at the icy hand I grabbed.

"Found me, Vin," says Pan, sounding like he's about to laugh.

I feel his hand grab me, and I scream, as he pulls me towards him.

"Don't be scared, Vin," says Pan's taunting voice. "I'm not going to hurt you. You're too valuable."

With that, the darkness that surrounds me vanishes, and I find myself looking at Pan's smirking face, in the middle of the Lost Boy's camp.

* * *

**A/N**:

So, there you have it! We saw Pan's point of view. Just so y'all know, there will be more times we see the story from other character's points of view. Those times will always told in the third person, to avoid confusion with Jess's perspective. Jess's point of view is always going to be in the first person. Just as a heads up!

Thank you **23a, ****CMalwaysHP, Goofy-Goober3D, **and **NeedtoRead10** for putting this story on alert, and **scorpiongirl92** for your awesome review! And, as always, a special thanks to my beta-readers, **Uncommon Fairy,** and **Can't-Escape-My-Fandoms. **You guys are amazing!

Please review, follow, favorite, or whatever y'all want! Opinions of Pan's point of view are especially appreciated; it is not easy to write a dark character like him! **:****)**


	8. Chapter 8

**Disclaimer: Due to unforseen circumstances, today's disclaimer has been cancelled. **

* * *

I take a moment to get ahold of my surroundings, then another to control my feelings.

I'm not sure what Pan was playing at in the cave, or how we got to the camp, but I can't let that affect me. Pan wants me to fear him; his little game in the cave proved that much to me.

But he needs me alive for something, or else he wouldn't have saved me from the mermaids. And, he wants me to trust him, and him alone, which means he needs me to be willing to do whatever it is he needs me for.

So, he may try to scare me, but for now, I know he won't hurt me. Therefore, I don't have to be afraid of him.

_But still, how he acted in the cave…._

He managed to effectively make me feel insecure, by acting like a ghost in a horror movie. He was able to play me like a well tuned piano, and that's enough to get my skin crawling at the very least.

At the most, it makes me wonder if I actually have a chance of escape.

_No, I have to. I have to be able to escape. I promised Abby I'd come back, and I will._

I exhale, and give Pan a condescending look.

"Let go of me," I say calmly.

We've played this game last night, but this time, I intend to win.

"You've already tried that, Vin," replies Pan. "I don't think it will work a second time."

I want to hit him, to punch him, kick him. Anything to get my hand out of his cold grip.

But I refuse to react like that. It will only show him how successful he is in getting under my skin.

So, I simply shrug, like it doesn't bother me.

"Why did you save me from the mermaid?" I ask, switching topics.

If I fight him over letting go of me, I know we'll just launch into some banter that he'll love, and I won't get free until he makes me feel scared or insecure again.

_I won't let that happen. _

"I need you, Vin, because you are a very special person," Pan answers. "Someone that we here in Neverland have needed for quite some time, without even knowing."

And, now he's launching into a mysterious, ominous reason. I wonder if he is just like this naturally, or he enjoys being a dramatic.

I know from his look that he is just dying for me to ask what I am that is so important, so I don't.

_He gets under my skin, I get under his. _

Besides, I resolved to not answer to Vin, anyway.

Pan notices my refusal to respond, and continues before the silence becomes too obvious.

"A Dreamer," he continues. "You, Vin, have the heart of a Dreamer. And not just any Dreamer. You are-by far-the most powerful one that I have ever seen."

I don't know what a Dreamer is , but apparently, it's pretty important. Still, though, I mask my confusion, and keep myself from asking.

_I'm not playing his game. No matter how much he baits me, I'm not playing it. Not until he calls me Jess._

I can tell Pan is getting annoyed by my silence, so I give him a completely innocent smile, that he obviously doesn't buy.

The boys in camp, who were playing some game of throwing knives on the ground, are now watching the two of us intently.

"Oh, I'm sorry, am I supposed to be awed by that statement?" I ask, after a brief silence.

The look Pan gives me makes me want to shrink back, but cheer at the same time.

I'm annoying him. And it's fun. But at the same time, I know that I'm starting to push him. The last thing I need is for Pan to lose his temper. I don't want to be the one receiving his anger if that happens.

However, I need to know what he needs me for. If I can find out, I can use it to my advantage. And, figuring out what the heck a Dreamer is would be a big help.

But I'm not going to give him the pleasure of seeing how confused I am.

_No, I do this on my own terms._

"Fine," I say, rolling my eyes, with a fake, exasperated sigh. "What's a Dreamer?"

This makes him look weak. It gives the appearance that I know what he's talking about, and his dramatics have failed to impress me. As if he's acting dramatic for no reason.

I sense his grip weaken as he's about to explain, and I pull out of his grip. Last time, even though I tried to hide it, he probably knew I was scared of him from how much my hand was shaking. I really don't need that.

Even though I'm out of his grip, I don't try to run. I think its pretty clear that I can't run while I'm in the camp. The Lost Boys will either stop me or catch me.

"There are several types of people, Vin," he explains, trying to regain his bravado. "Two are practically born for Neverland: Believers and Dreamers."

He starts to circle me like a vulture, and I turn, making sure to keep my eyes on him. I don't want him to pull anything.

"You see, in Neverland," he continues. "All you have to do is think of something to have it. You have to think of it, and you have to believe you have it. Dreamers and Believers get it off easily. Believers can do the second part in the blink of an eye. All they have to do is believe. They can get almost anything, so long as they put their mind to it.

"But Dreamers, they are just as powerful on Neverland, if not more so. They can think up the most unbelievable things, down to the finest detail, and they will have it. They just have to believe that Neverland's magic will get it for them. And you, Vin, are most definitely a Dreamer."

I try to keep emotion off my face, but I can't help but wonder what he means by all of that.

_So I'm a "Dreamer" apparently. So what?_

"How do you know that?" I ask, crossing my arms. My tone makes it sound like I'm testing him, instead of asking because I don't know.

I catch the look in his eyes, and I know that he sees through my act. He continues, though, as if it doesn't matter.

"Dreamers all have similar traits, Vin," he explains.

"They all have very, very powerful imaginations. They look at confusing situations, and figure them out like puzzles within minutes. Their dreams are clearer, and they remember their dreams for longer.

"I send the shadow to search for people who are potentially Dreamers. When it finds one, it steals the one person closest to the Dreamer, and knocks the Dreamer out. If they are truly a Dreamer, they will be so intent on finding their loved one, they will be able to enter Neverland."

I get a sinking feeling in my gut, as he describes it all so casually. He's been having his shadow stalk and kidnap people, and he acts like it's nothing. It's sick.

I give him a look of complete disgust, but he only smirks.

"If they are powerful enough to find Neverland," he continues. "They'll be able navigate Neverland, to find where their loved one is being held. And then..."

He cuts off to chuckle, as if remembering something fondly.

"Then I cast the spell to wake them up. If they wake up before I can offer the deal I offered you, then they are slightly less powerful as I need them to be."

So that's what happened. I'm not the first. I was just one of the ones that got through in time to save Abby.

"But you, Vin," he says, pointing at me. "You were resisting that spell, the moment I cast it. I cast it as soon as you found our camp, and started to free your sister. But you would just _not_ wake up. I had to put the spell on a second time for you to wake up."

"So?" I ask, feeling apprehension creeping in.

"So?" repeats Pan, as if in disbelief. "Vin, I can count on the fingers of one hand the amount of Dreamers who are able to find camp, alone. When you resisted that spell, you showed just how powerful you truly are."

I stare at him, and grip my hands into fists.

"And what would have happened if I had woken up before you made the deal? Or if I wasn't even a Dreamer?" I ask.

_Heck, why did he have to make the deal, anyway?_

There has to be some better method of testing a Dreamer's power besides kidnapping a loved one. The shadow could have easily carried me off without taking Abby.

"We always need more recruits," Pan replies, smiling. He gives me a piercing look, and the truth dawns on me, just before he says it.

"You wondered why you can hear children crying, Vin. Lets just say that their Dreamer wasn't able to stay asleep long enough."

I've tried to hold back my feelings, up until now.

Feelings of anger, shock, and revulsion fill me, and I'm not sure how to express them.

He kidnaps children, so that others can come, and try to get them. I'm the only one who actually succeeded. He has kept all the children that he stole, because the Dreamers weren't fast enough, or strong enough. Or they want even Dreamers at all.

_That's what would have happened to Abby if I hadn't made in time…if I hadn't been powerful enough…_

The thought of my innocent little sister, as a prisoner on this island, forced to stay with Pan. To be a pet for him to play with.

I think of all the children crying in the room last night. Of Toodles. Was he one of those children taken by Pan? He said he had no siblings, just his mother and his friends.

_Was one of his friends a Dreamer who wasn't fast enough? Or even worse, was it his mother? Was she a possible Dreamer who didn't reach her son in time, and is doomed to never see him again?_

I back away from Pan, my face and eyes conveying my feelings for what he has just told me.

"You...sick...insane...twisted...bastard!" I exclaim, struggling to find the right words.

He grins, as if reveling in what I'm calling him.

"Why do you need me?" I ask, trying to keep myself from shouting. "Why do you need a Dreamer, Pan? Why do you have to kidnap innocent kids?"

Pan chuckles darkly, and it's all I can do not to look away.

"Because, Vin," he says. "You are the most powerful Dreamer I have ever seen. Neverland will give you whatever you imagine. And whatever I tell you to imagine."

_So that's it. He wants to make me a weapon. A tool to make whatever he needs, whenever he wants. _

"No," I say, looking straight at him. "No, there's more to this. You're not telling me everything. Why did you need to make the deal with me? Why do you need a very powerful Dreamer?"

"I only take the best," Pan replies, airily. "If I'm going to have a Dreamer, I need one that I know will be powerful enough to give me what I have in mind. And trust me, Vin, the stuff to comes to my mind is very, very complex."

It feels more like a promise than a warning. He's promising me a life as a slave, creating whatever crazy things that come into his mind.

My mind is reeling, and I simply stand, almost dazed. I'm able to grasp at one clear thought.

"I will get away," I murmur, to myself.

Pan raises an eyebrow, and cocks his head.

"What was that, Vin?" he asks.

_Yes, it's true. I will escape. I have to. Not just for Abby's sake, but for my own. _

If Pan is truly planning to do what he says he's done, then I have to get out. If I don't, I'll become like the Lost Boys: bending towards Pan every whim, with unending loyalty.

Or worse, I'll lose my mind completely. Become a broken shell of who I am, tucked away in the corner of camp, until Pan needs me to do something.

_A mindless weapon for him. _

I look at Pan and meet his eyes.

"I will escape, Pan," I repeat, defiance welling in me. "I'm no tool for you to use when you need something. If what you say is true, then Neverland will give me whatever I need. I guarantee you, Pan, I will use every last ounce of magic, to get away. You won't be able to use me, Pan. I will get out."

Pan's face tells me he's unimpressed, but the look in his eyes tells me otherwise. It's a mixture of eagerness, and glee, but anger and fear at the same time.

"I'm sure," he replies, dryly, as if he doesn't believe me.

For a moment, we just stand there, glaring at each other, neither one willing to break their gaze first.

Finally, Pan looks away, and I inwardly cheer. I won this round.

_Point to Jess!_

"So, shall we get started?" asks Pan, as the boys slowly go back to their games.

"With what?" I ask, leaning casually against a tree, with my arms crossed, a position that looks both rebellious and uncaring.

"You want to learn how to use magic, don't you?" he replies. "If you're so intent on _escaping_?"

He emphasizes the word with so much sarcasm, it takes all my willpower to not stalk away.

_Actually, maybe I will. _

Let him think I just need to cool down, and really get away. Preferably someplace he can't reach me.

But, he does have a point.

If I am going to get away, I do need to know at least how to use magic. But I can't exactly concede this point to Pan, so I simply shrug, my expression a bored façade.

Pan smirks, and I know he sees the truth. Well, he can't prove it if he calls me out on it.

"Open your hand," he instructs, demonstrating.

I roll my eyes, as if to say _If I must,_ and hold out my hand in front of me.

"Now close your eyes, and imagine something," he continues, sounding like a parent instructing a small kid how to play a game. "What do you want to eat? I take it you're hungry."

My stomach growls, agreeing with that last part. It's true, I haven't eaten since I got here last night, and I'm starved.

_But I won't think of that. I do this on my own terms._

Instead, I imagine something else.

I imagine that it is sitting in my open hand.

I can practically feel the texture on my fingers, the weight slightly pushing down my hand, the smell of the paper…

By now, I've completely tuned out what he is saying. Instead, I focus on what he said before.

_Okay_, I think, _Neverland's magic gives you anything, so long as you believe in it. I believe that it is giving me this right now, and I believe that I'm holding it._

I hear the Lost Boys whooping loudly, and I open my eyes.

In my hand sits a copy of _The Silver Chair_.

I shouldn't be too surprised, as Pan told me this would happen. But it still doesn't take away the shock that the book suddenly appeared in my hand. Or that I made it.

Pan is watching me, looking somewhat proud, and the Lost Boys are watching with awe.

Hesitantly, I raise my other hand, and stroke the cover.

_Yes, the book is real. _

I open it to a random page, and recognize the part about meeting the Lady of the Green Kirtle. I read the page eagerly, and find that every word is the same.

_A perfect copy._

By reading the page, I think of Abby. This book is like having a bit of her with me, reminding me of how I we spent time together, bonding over this book.

Tears sting my eyes, as I take in this precious treasure.

"A book?" scoffs one boy. "Out of all the things you could think of, you choose book?"

I don't reply, but simply sink down to the ground, absorbing the story, as I rapidly read. I take in the story, the beauty of the words, and the way they are written. It is a child's book, but reading it makes me feel grown up. Nobody did it like C.S. Lewis.

"Do you eat those?" asks another boy, referring to how Pan suggested food.

_I don't eat books; I devour them. _

I read, and take in the stories, the knowledge, the wisdom they offer. These boys can't even begin to understand the priceless value of this book.

"Well, Vin?" asks Pan, looking down at me.

I look up at him, tears of joy brimming in my eyes.

"Thank you for teaching me, Pan," I say, smiling.

Somehow, the anger and fear I had felt before is gone. I hate him, but I can't feel anything but good right now.

I stand up, and clutch the book as if it were my first-born son.

"Now I can fight you," I continue. "Now I can use all of Neverland's magic against you. But most of all, I can remember."

I look down at the book, and my smile grows.

"I can create things like this. Things that remind me of my family. Of why I'm going to escape you."

I glance at the Lost Boys, and I know that soon they're going to get back to their loud, and rowdy games. I'm not in the mood to fight them right now, but I can't run either.

So, instead, I walk away, to a corner of camp, that's away from all the noise.

I pause for a moment, and turn to meet Pan's dark look. He's seen it. He's seen that he's given me a tool, not something to win me over.

"And it's Jess," I add, before heading to my quiet corner.

Plopping down, I close my eyes, and imagine a bowl of ramen noodles, with a fork (I need to nail the important details). I open my eyes to the steaming bowl of pasta, and smile.

For the first time since the shadow took me, a sense of content runs through me, as I happily hum to myself, opening the book, and digging in to the ramen.

* * *

**A/N: **Hey guys! Me again (who else would be writing these?)

So, we now know why Pan wanted Jess specifically. Is there more to it than her being a powerful Dreamer? Absolutely! But, that won't come until later (hahaha, mine is an evil laugh)!

Also, over a thousand views in less than a month? Seriously? Thank you, Thank You, THANK YOU! You guys are all amazing, especially **Kitten825 **and **Shimmering. Water17** for putting this story on alert, **Kitten825** for favoriting it, and **Kitten825, scorpiongirl92, Female Whovian, **and **emanderson** for their awesome reviews! And, of course, a special thanks to my betas, **Uncommon Fairy **and **Can't-Escape-My-Fandoms**!

Please follow, favorite, or review, or whatever y'all want to do! Reviews about the Dreamer concept are greatly appreciated. Let me know it all: the good, the bad, and the ugly! **:)**


	9. Chapter 9

**Disclaimer: I do not own OUAT. Actually, I don't own much of anything, so if you're thinking of robbing me, just don't bother. **

* * *

The night drifts on rather uneventfully.

The Lost Boys play their games, but I don't participate.

I just sit in my corner, and read.

What's great is that even when I finish a book, I can just think of another without hesitation. I haven't moved since I sat down.

A small stack of books sit beside me, as I read, tuning out the Lost Boys. Everything from Lewis, to Tolkien, to Hugo, to Baum. I can't get enough.

Pan sometimes shoots me dark scowls, that I innocently look up at, only for him to turn into a smirk at the last second. At this, I shoot him a smirk of my own, and continue my reading. Pan was probably hoping to change me into a female version of the Lost Boys, with their games of throwing weapons, and fighting one another. Instead, he's got an intellectual, who prefers reading.

_The most powerful Dreamer, choosing to read instead of hangout with a bunch of killer boys who don't grow up. And he's surprised?_

At one point, Pan gets a smug look, and pulls out a set of pipes. I look up from _The Fellowship of the Ring_, watching as he blows into them.

His pipes must be broken, because I don't hear a sound. But his minions must be intent on pleasing him, because they all get up and start dancing.

_Pitiful._

I roll my eyes, and get back to reading about Frodo and Sam. I feel Pan's eyes on me, and I know he's scowling again. I guess he hoped to get me dancing to pipes that I couldn't hear.

But as I look up again, I'm not so sure. Even the boys who were crying last night are dancing.

_That's kind of strange. But, hey, it's none of my business if they want to dance around._

"You don't want to join the party?"

I see Pan coming over to sit beside me, clearly trying to start a conversation.

_So he missed our usual banter. I'm touched._

"I'm doing alright on my own, thanks," I reply coolly, clearly telling him I want to be left alone.

But he doesn't leave. He just watches, as if trying to figure me out.

_Well, if he wants a puzzle, I can get him a rubik's cube; he's not going to be able to solve me._

I ignore his stares, but it's much harder to concentrate with him staring at me.

Finally, I look up, adopting the air of a bored socialite.

"Is there something you want?" I ask. "Because I'm at a rather good part, and it's hard to concentrate with you reading over my shoulder."

Pan gives me a look of mock-surprise.

"I'm hurt, Vin," he replies, touching his heart as if I really hurt him. "I only wanted to give my congratulations."

I raise a questioning eyebrow, but say nothing. I don't answer to Vin.

"You won this round," he explains. "You proved you have a stubborn, defiant streak in you. You let me teach you how to use your powers as a Dreamer, but you did it on your own terms. Nicely played."

_Wait, is he…Is he _complimenting _me? _

I know he's probably only doing it to pull me into an argument, but I can't resist.

"How did those words taste coming out of your mouth?" I ask, my voice filled with disbelief.

"Like vinegar," he replies, a hint of bitterness exposed in his voice.

He hates that I won this round. Felix claimed that Peter Pan never fails, but he's still failing with me.

"But you didn't let me finish, Vin," he continues.

"Uh-huh, sure," I say sarcastically, opening my book.

If he keeps calling me Vin, then he shouldn't expect me to be part of this conversation.

"It's that stubborn streak that is going to make you so fun to break," he explains. "It's always the spirited ones who break the best."

I give a snort of derision, and look up from my book.

"I think we've seen just how successful your 'breaking me' has been," I reply. "And seriously, 'breaking me?' Doesn't that seem a little-I don't know-over dramatic? I mean, I know you think yourself the manipulative demon in stories, but don't you think that's over the top?"

Pan lets out a small chuckle that tells me that he doesn't think so at all.

"Okay, fine," I say, shrugging. "You want to go for the tacky drama queen angle, your choice."

I can tell by the look on his face that this isn't how the conversation was supposed to go.

I smirk, and get back to my reading.

"Jess?"

I look up at the cautious voice that I recognize as Toodles'.

I smile, and mark my page.

Toodles is standing in front of me, with a small group of the younger boys. A chubby kid, who looks to be about eight years old, a lanky boy with mischievous eyes, probably no older than ten, and a set of twins.

Toodles glances swiftly at Pan, a hint of fear in his eyes. Pan simply smirks, and I shoot him a look of disgust. He enjoys inspiring fear in these kids. Kids he kidnapped because their loved ones were not strong enough for Pan.

"Yes, Toodles?" I ask, turning back to him.

He shifts shyly from one foot to another, and seems to be finding the courage to say something. He probably doesn't want to ask in front of Pan.

I smile encouragingly, and look at the group standing around him.

"Who're these?" I ask, gesturing to the group.

"Um," he replies, glancing behind him. "This is Nibs, Slightly, and the Twins."

He gestures to the chubby boy, the lanky boy, and twins in that order.

I nod to them, and hold out my hand to shake. They just look at it, confused.

_I guess Pan only introduces with one of his "welcome-our-new-sibling/captive" speech. _

"Nice to meet you," I try instead, smiling to show that I'm not going to eat them. The way one of the Twins is looking me, you'd think I am.

"What did you want to say, Toodles?" I ask.

"Can...Can you…"

He squirms, and looks at Pan, fearfully.

"Careful, Toodles," says Pan cheerfully. "We don't want to encourage Vin to misbehave, now do we?"

I hear the veiled threat under his voice, and bite back a retort.

Toodles, however, looks even more nervous at Pan's threat.

"It's alright, Toodles," I reassure him. "I'm sure whatever you ask won't be bad."

Toodles, glances from Pan, to me, then back at Pan.

"Canyoureadtous?" he asks all at once.

Pan snorts at this, and I turn and smack him on the arm. The gesture is natural enough that he ignores it.

"I didn't catch that, Toodles," I say, turning back towards the boys.

"He asked if you can read to us," explains Slightly, looking a little annoyed.

I look at Toodles, who nods in confirmation.

"Of course,"I reply, shifting my stack of books away, and gesturing for them to sit down.

They sit around me, and watch me with curious eyes.

"What would you like me to read?" I ask.

"Read the book you imagined," Nibs suggests.

At the same time, Slightly speaks up, "Read a story about white rats!"

I can't help but grin at Slightly's strange request, and hold up my hands as the other three start to babble suggestions. Pan shifts, watching with vague interest.

"Alright, alright!" I say over their voices. "How about I read you boys the story of _The Princess Bride_, and we'll see how you like that one."

"But that sounds like a girl's story," sneers Slightly.

"Not really," I reply. "There are some kissing parts, I guess, but its more about sword fights, revenge, and monsters than it is about romance."

I haven't read the book in a while, but I honestly think the boys will enjoy it, so long as I take out the cursing.

_Then again, maybe I'll keep that in, just to annoy Pan._

The boys seem to be alright with my suggestion, so I imagine a copy of the book.

I start to read, starting with how the most beautiful women in the world lost their looks to sweets, disease, and wrinkles.

I have a feeling that the boys will get bored with the romantic parts pretty fast, so I only touch on the romantic parts, making sure to get the important information in.

In no time, Buttercup is kidnapped, and the story starts to get interesting.

As I start to read about the part about climbing the cliffs, the group grows, some of the older boys putting down their weapons to listen.

By the time I've gotten to the sword fight between Inigo Montoya and the Man in Black, the most of the boys are listening.

Even Felix stops to listen as I go on to the part about battle of wits between Vizzini and the Man in Black, and Pan cracks a smirk at Vizzini's fate.

Several times I consider taking a break, but I don't.

The boys become invested in the story, about the R.O.U.S.'s, the six-fingered man, and Miracle Max. They hush Nibs at the scene of Westley's torture for sneezing, and laugh at the appearance of Max's wife, Valerie.

Most are sitting on their ankles, hanging on my every word at the final duel between Inigo Montoya and Count Rugen, and Westley's description of "to-the-pain" I'm pretty sure Pan enjoys the description too much.

Finally, hours later, I finish the story, and close the book. I'm exhausted, and it hurts to talk too much.

But the boys are all fine. I wonder how long it is until morning, when I remember what Bae told me about Pan controlling time.

_Doesn't matter, I'm still going to sleep when I find the right place to lay down. Preferably more than thirty-nine and half feet away from Pan. _

"Buttercup was pretty dumb," remarks Slightly, as he gets up.

I shrug.

"It's more about the boys than it is about Buttercup," I reply. "I think the point of her is that no matter how much she tries, she can never forget the one she loved."

At this, Pan stirs a little, and I get the feeling that I know why. Because I just told him that I can never forget the ones I loved. Like the one I exchanged my own freedom for.

_And I won't. I have the books to remind me who I'm fighting for._

"So, did you boys like the book?" I ask, standing up and stretching.

There are eager nods, and cheers in reply.

And requests that I read another.

I shake my head; my voice hurts too much for another. Besides, I'm too tired to read another, as I explain this to the boys.

"Fine, but you have to read to us later," says Nibs with a sense of finality in his voice.

I bite my lip at this.

_Hopefully, with a little luck, I'll be back home by that time. _

"We'll see," I reply, avoiding giving a definite answer.

The thing is, I enjoyed reading to them. It was like reading to Abby. But it just feels like I shouldn't like it. Like I'm betraying my sister by reading to these boys.

"Well," I say, stretching. "Its been fun, but I'm tired, guys. I'm going to lay down for a while."

_A long while._

I don't think that I can stand another night with the crying children. But I don't want to exactly leave them, either.

Actually, right now, there is no crying. Probably because they are all gathered around me, listening to my book.

But if I go to sleep, they probably will to. And the crying will start.

Out of indecision, I simply start to walk towards the foliage. It's probably quieter there, anyway.

"Oh, Vin, do you think that it's that easy to leave camp like that?"

Pan's taunting voice makes me stop.

I turn, feeling a little rebellious.

_I. Want. To. Sleep._

"No," I reply testily. "I'm going to where it's quieter, so I can sleep without being woken up by your boy band's games."

Pan grins, and I can tell he's onto something.

"So, you are staying?" he asks.

_Oh. Shoot._

I just admitted that I'm not trying to run. This means, in his eyes, I'm getting more comfortable. That I'm less willing to get away.

"Don't let it go to your head," I reply, crossing my arms. All exhaustion has left me, and I'm pretty sure he sees that.

"It's just easier for me to slip away in the morning. Nice job at wearing me out, by the way."

_There, let him think I'm planning to escape in the morning (if he lets it become morning) and that I'm tired. I'll probably run away in as soon as I'm alone, now._

"But, Vin," he points out, a malicious gleam in his eyes. "The younger boys need their sister to make sure they're alright tonight. You don't want them crying, do you?"

I look over at the younger boys. Toodles, the Twins, Nibs, even Slightly (who is kind of conceited), are all looking at me with pleading eyes.

"Yes," said Pan, looking at me. "They need you to take care of them, Vin, like a good big sister."

I feel my stomach plunge.

_That's his play. That's what he wants me to do. _

He knows that I instinctively take care of others. I took care of Abby when Mom needed my help, and exchanged places with my little sister when she needed me. I comforted Toodles when he needed a friend, and without hesitation, I ran out of the cave to save Bae.

That's what he wants. He wants me to take care of the boys, as a friend and sister. That way, when I do, it will be harder for me to run. When I grow closer to them, I won't be able to escape without the guilt of knowing that I'm leaving the boys who need me behind. And then, my heart won't be in it. I may try to escape, but I won't really be trying. Because I won't be able to leave to boys who I will have grown to love.

It's like a sucker punch. Pan is using one of the things I do naturally as a weapon, so that I can allow myself to become a prisoner.

This is far too below the belt to ignore.

"Screw you!" I shout, grabbing a nearby knife, and throwing it at him.

To my surprise, he has to duck at the last second, leaving the knife stuck in the tree, too close to his face for him to pretend that he was expecting that.

Eyes are glued to the knife, and to me and Pan.

Pan looks back at me, and grins.

"Nice, Vin," he says. "I'll have to train you how to throw properly. You may have potential in knife throwing."

_I don't have time for his banter, or his taunts. _

"Leave me alone, Pan," I snarl.

"What?" he asks. "What do you think I'm doing?"

He walks up to me, and I imagine a gleaming knife in my hands.

_If he tries anything, I swear I will stab him so deeply he'll be dead in seconds._

"I'm offering you a family, Vin," he says, gesturing to the Lost Boys. "A place where you can be accepted. Isn't that what you want?"

"No," I reply, my voice dripping. "I don't want that. I have acceptance, back home. I don't want a family. I have one, back home. I don't want to be the "greatest Lost One" or the 'most powerful Dreamer.' I don't want any of that."

"What do you want, then?" asks Pan, coming closer. I hold up the knife, letting him know exactly what will happen if he comes any closer.

"I want to go back home," I reply. "I believe I've expressed this enough, but you seem to be forgetting it."

I feel a twinge of pride that my tone is more frustrated than vulnerable. It makes me seem stronger than I really am. Pan snorts at my reply.

"Back home?" he repeats. "Back to a life where you go to school, learning countless, meaningless lessons, never having a life with your friends because you're taking care of Abby every night."

_No, he does not get to say her name. He does not have the _right _to say it. _

"At least I'm happy there," I reply, in all honesty.

_As much as I've dreamed of adventure, I'll take my old life over this one any day._

"You could be happy here," Pan points out. "If you'd give it a chance."

I cock my head.

_The good-cop-bad-cop routine isn't working out for him, especially since he's the only one doing it._

"No," I reply. "Because I'm not going to take that chance. I made a promise, and I'm going to keep it."

"And if I stop you?" asks Pan.

In answer, I hurl the knife at him. I know he probably goaded me into saying that, but it doesn't matter.

I barely miss, but this time, he doesn't so much as flinch.

"You won't," I reply. "Weren't you paying attention to the book? Love always wins. And you are, if anything, incapable of love."

With that, I turn on my heel, and head into the foliage.

I think I have about ten seconds before they realize that I may be running.

I'm not. I'm through with running.

I'm escaping.

_Okay,_ I tell myself, _calm down and think._

_Right now, I'm practically letting steam come out of my ears, and that isn't good. I need to be calm. If I'm angry, my emotions will blind me, and I will just end up with the Lost Boys again._

I confine myself to walking, not running. Surprisingly, none of the boys have followed me.

_Strange._

I exhale, trying to get a grip on the situation.

What Pan is doing is unforgivable, so there is no way that I'm going back. But I also don't have anywhere to go. I can only walk, and try to figure out what to do.

I hear footsteps nearby, but I continue to walk. They're too far off, and if the Lost Boys want to deal with a temperamental teenage girl, then they better batten down the hatches.

Still, for security's sake, I close my eyes, and imagine another knife. However, as soon as I have it in my hand, I drop it.

_I can't find security in weapons. That's what Pan is trying to get me to do. I won't cave in to even the simplest things he does to my emotions. I need to be stronger than that._

The footsteps are closer, and I see a lantern light, not that far away. I consider just walking away, but my emotions get ahead of me.

_Can't Pan, for once, give me some privacy?!_

"Go away!" I shout. "Leave me alone!"

_Yeah, I really succeeded in getting my emotions down. Way to go, Jess._

_"Lass?"_

I stop at the familiar voice.

Pan can imitate voices; his little game in the dark taught me that. But if it isn't…

Hesitantly, I step towards the lantern light. It isn't Pan.

"Hook?" I ask, stepping into the light.

The pirate, holding a lantern by his hook, sees me. Relief crosses his face, and he smiles.

"I thought you were dead, lass," he says. "When you jumped, Pan looked so panicked-.'

He cuts off, finally getting a good look at me. I stop myself, thinking how I must look. I've been in water twice, running through the woods countless times, in Bae's caves, had my wrists bruised by Pan, and have only gotten a few hours of sleep at different times. I must look like a mess to him.

_Heck, I _am_ a mess._

"Lass?" he asks, uncertainly.

That's when I hear it. The sound I heard all last night. The children, crying. Because I'm the only one who cares enough to do anything about it. And I'm not doing anything.

All the pressure that has been building on me, all the haywire emotions that have been going through me finally take their toll.

Looking down at the ground, I start crying.

* * *

**A/N: **Poor Jess. One minute, she thinks she's winning; the next, she's hurt and upset (sigh).

Sorry this chapter is late. Independence Day weekend has kept me busy, tired, and separate from my laptop. Oh, well. Thank you **scorpiongirl92** for putting this story on alert, and **meguhanu, quiet101,** and **scorpiongirl92** for favoriting it. Also, thank you **meguhanu, Female whovian, scorpiongirl92,** and **Guest** for your reviews. And, of course, thank you **Uncommon Fairy** and **Can't-Escape-My-Fandoms** for being my betas. Y'all are amazing!

Please follow, favorite, review, or whatever you guys want. Free nerd points to anyone who can fit a Princess Bride quote in a review! **:)**


	10. Chapter 10

**Disclaimer: If you don't know what goes here, _I'm_ not telling you.**

* * *

All the pressure that has been building on me, all the haywire emotions that have been going through me finally take their toll.

Looking down at the ground, I start crying.

I cry because Pan has pulled such a low blow, using my nature against me. Because I'm miserable here, and I swore that I would escape, but I have no idea how. Because I'm cold, and dirty, and tired, and I don't know when I'm going to get out of this place. Because I'm relieved to find a friendly face. Because part of me wishes I could be comforting those kids, but I can't, because they will tear me away from home.

Hook lowers his lantern, and walks over to me, concern taking place of the relief that had been on his face.

"Hey, it's alright," he murmurs consolingly to me. He hesitates, and after a moment, wraps a comforting arm around me.

I'm really glad that I decided trust him, or else I would feel awkward about burying my face into his coat, and sobbing into him.

For his part, Hook doesn't pull away or makes the situation more tense. He just rubs his hand around me soothingly, and softly tell me that I'm alright. I don't know how long I cry, but I just know that its enough to take away the things I've bottled up.

When I finally calm down a little, I pull myself out, and look up, wiping my eyes.

Hook surveys me up and down, his eyes lingering on my bruised wrist.

"What happened, lass?" he asks, taking in my appearance.

I wipe my nose, and exhale.

_I've had my cry; I've got my emotions under control, somewhat. Now, I have to stay calm. Crying won't get me out. _

Hook gestures for me to walk with him. I start to explain everything that happened after I jumped off the cliff.

I keep Bae out of it, instead saying that I was able to find a cave nearby. I'm not sure why, but I have a feeling that Bae may want to meet Hook on his own before he trusts him.

I have trouble remaining calm as I explain Pan's ploy with the younger boys, but I'm able to control it. Just barely, though.

"...So I left camp," I finish. "I'm trying to find someway to escape, but I'm just so tired…"

I trail off, letting Hook figure out the rest. We keep walking in silence for a few minutes before Hook speaks up.

"You're going to have a mite trouble escaping, lass."

I stop, and look at him, ready to put up a fight. If he has a despairing speech about escape, I'm not in the mood. If it's something that makes Pan seem more powerful, I'm going to hit him.

"I've been on this island for years," he explain. "Me crew and I have searched for a way to leave. We haven't found anything, after years of looking."

I roll my eyes, and start to stalk forward. If he wants to talk about how it is impossible to escape Neverland, then he's just wasting my time.

_Well, actually, I have plenty of time, but my family doesn't._

"I'm not doubting your resolve, lass," Hook insists, as he hurries to catch up. "I'm just saying that you are going to have some trouble. Especially if Pan wants you to stay. He's going to fight for you to remain in Neverland."

"I don't care," I reply, turning to face him. "I need to get back to my family. If Pan wants to keep me here, he's going to have to throw everything he's got at me. I _am_ going to leave Neverland."

I continue to walk, but don't stalk away. Letting my emotions control me takes me away from my goal.

Finally, Hook walks next to me, but he doesn't say anything. Surprisingly, I'm okay with us just walking. It's nice to have the company.

After a few minutes, we come to a stream. I can't help but smile a bit in recognition. It's the same one Pan pushed me in when I first came. It means I'm in familiar territory.

"So, where's the rest of your crew?" I ask, as we walk along the side.

"Back on me ship," he replies. "The Jolly Roger."

I nod, but something strikes me as odd. I can't quite place my finger on it. I glance at my dim reflection in the water, and stop for a moment to get a better look. I look worse than I thought.

I'm pretty much smudged anywhere that isn't covered, and I'm only in my jeans and tank top, which have holes in different places. My hair is a matted mess, and I probably have bags under my eyes from lack of sleep. Not to mention that they are probably still red from my breakdown.

Hook catches what I'm looking at, and smiles sympathetically.

"I didn't want to say anything," he says, shrugging. "I know how girls hate to be told that they don't look good. You're pretty enough anyway, there didn't seem to be a point."

I roll my eyes at the flattery, but smile a little.

_Still though, I can stand to be cleaned up a little. Okay, fine, a lot._

Closing my eyes, I imagine a brush, just like my brush back home.

I hear Hook's gasp, and open my eyes, my brush in my hand.

I tug at my hair, trying to pull out the band that is holding it up. It must be really tangled in there, because after a few minutes of tugging, I only manage to nearly dislocate my shoulder.

"Here," says Hook, chuckling. "Let me try."

I turn around, and let him struggle for a little.

_It's strange how I'm trusting him this much. I'm not sure why. I know he was genuinely reluctant to hand me over to Pan, and that he promised he wouldn't hurt me. But that makes us-what-allies? At the most? _

"It's in there good," he says, after his turn of fruitless tugging. "You may have to cut it out, lass."

I reach up to my hair, trying to think of a solution besides that. I'm not in the mood for losing my hair.

I glance at the brush I was holding.

_Pan said that all you have to do in Neverland is think of something to have it. What if you think of something that's already there, just in a different place?_

I close my eyes, and imagine my rubber band disappearing from my hair, and reappearing on my wrist. I can feel its weak hold on my rat's nest hair fade, and I feel it appearing, ever so tightly on my wrist.

Opening my eyes, I see it there. I start to grin a little, and I part my hair, letting the brush do its work.

Hook sees what I've done, and arches an eyebrow.

"That's impressive, lass," he notes, as he and I continue to walk.

"Can't you do it?" I ask, as I brush out the first of lots of tangles.

Hook shakes his head.

"Trust me," he says. "If I did, me crew would have all the rum in the world, and we'd be eating like kings every night."

_I guess he's not a Dreamer. But, then again, Pan said everyone can do it in Neverland._

"All you have to do is think of something, and believe that the magic will get it for you," I explain.

"Aye, for children maybe," says Hook nodding. "But not for adults."

"Oh, so I'm a child now?" I ask playfully, knowing he didn't mean it like that.

"Just barely," replies Hook.

He pulls out his sword, and uses it to cut through the thick foliage in front of us. It's easier to walk through without it blocking your path.

_Or without a string of Lost Boys on your tail, for that matter. _

"So, where exactly are we headed?" I ask, following him as he cuts a particularly thick branch out of the way.

"Back to the Roger," he replies. "Unless you'd rather stay on the island."

I pause, thinking it over.

I would rather be on Hook's ship, but I don't want Pan taking his anger out on Hook when he finds that Hook has given me refuge. I also don't really want Mr. Smee insisting that they should hand me over.

That's when I realize what had struck me as odd earlier.

"Why are you alone?" I ask.

Hook hesitates for a second, but I catch it.

"If you've been on Neverland as long as you say you have," I press. "then you know it's probably smart to never be alone. Heck, I realized that when I first arrived. Why didn't you bring someone with you?"

Hook sighs and turns to face me. There's a hint of guilt on his face, and for the first time since I met him, I have to steel myself for what he is about to say.

_Has he betrayed the trust that I've given him?_

"Sometimes, Pan will call me to the island," he explains. "Sometimes, he will ask me to do something, in exchange for letting me and me crew roam the island. Tonight, well…"

He trails off, just as I did a while ago.

"He asked you to help him break me, didn't he?" I guess, reading between the lines.

_Why else would he be so relieved to see me, and so willing to comfort me when he saw I was hurt? _

I take his silence as a 'yes'.

"He told you to betray me," I continue. "And you didn't say no."

Hook looks away, and softly mutters, "I didn't say yes either."

To my surprise, I'm alright with it. He didn't agree immediately.

_He is considering saying no, which means he was willing to put his crew's lives at risk for me. I actually feel touched by this, not betrayed._

"Well," I say. "So long as it's not too bad."

Hook gives me a look of surprise.

"I don't understand, lass," he says, cutting the branch in front of us.

I shrug, feeling surprisingly light. My hair feels like it's got all the knots out, so I tie it back up.

"You didn't say yes immediately, which means that you don't want to betray me," I explain. "But, I don't want you to have your crew killed, either. So, yes, you can betray me, but seeing as I know, that kind of takes the blow away, which puts Pan a step behind us."

"Us?" repeats Hook, cocking an eyebrow.

Instead of replying to this, I give him an incredulous look. If I don't say something now, this will be bothering me forever.

"Okay, seriously," I say, pausing. "What is with it with the guys on Neverland and their eyebrows? Do you know how hard it is to concentrate on what you or Pan are saying while watching those things go up and down?"

The look on Hook's face is priceless. I wish I had a camera. Unable to resist, I start to laugh. After getting over his shock, Hook starts laughing as well.

It feels good, being able to laugh. And it must feel good to Hook as well, because as soon as he stops, he hears me laughing a little, and picks up where he left off. This causes me to laugh more also.

Finally, I'm wiping away tears from my eyes, and Hook has to use his hook on my shoulder to support himself.

"Oh, I needed that, lass," he says, when we are finally able to stop. "Thank you."

"I needed it just as much as you did," I reply, smiling. "Real laughter seems like a rare thing in Neverland."

He finally cuts the branch, and the foliage seems to be thinning.

In the back of mind, I sense something. I'm not sure what...but something.

As I take a step, I feel it more. Curious, I go forward through the foliage, the sense growing stronger with every step.

It's not the twisted feeling I get when I'm near Pan.

_It's good. Strong. Beautiful. Magical. _

I walk into a clearing, the sense practically radiating through me. I see a couple of tree stumps, that look like they have been cut down, rather badly at that.

Another tree still seems to be growing. Somehow, I know that whatever it is I'm sensing is at the top.

"Lass?" I hear Hook call.

I don't answer.

Instead, I walk to the tree, and hesitantly grab the first branch.

_Yes, the sense is stronger. It's definitely in this tree. _

I hoist myself up, and start to climb. I climbed a lot when I was little, so it isn't unfamiliar. The tree also has a lot of branches that make excellent handholds and footholds.

"Lass, what are you doing?" asks Hook, from down below.

"Don't you sense it?" I reply, continuing to climb.

"Sense what?" he asks.

_I guess he doesn't, then. _

"The magic," I answer. "It's really close. Don't you feel it?"

"No," replies Hook flatly. "Now come down before you break your neck."

_Aw, he's worried._

I feel something creep around my leg, twisting around my ankle. I look down, and see a rather creepy looking vine, winding its way around my calf.

"Bugger off," I tell it, kicking at it.

"What?" calls Hook.

"Nothing!" I reply, as the vine shies away.

_Good, I don't want to be distracted_.

I continue to climb, when I see it. Just an arm's length away is a blossom, open in the starlight.

It almost seems to be taking it in, giving it life. Like a night-time photosynthesis. Something inside the flower seems to be sparkling. Pollen, perhaps?

I reach out, and pinch some out of the flower.

As soon my fingers come in contact with the dust, I feel my foot slip on a patch of moss.

I reach for a handhold to steady myself, but find none. For a split second, I totter dangerously on the branch, and in another, I slip.

A shriek escapes me, and I hear Hook cry out something, as I fall. I think my life may flash before my eyes, but I can't tell, since they're closed.

_But, am I falling? _

I can feel the wind whipping around me, but I can't feel gravity working on me.

Hesitantly, I crack open an eye.

I'm not falling at all. If anything, I'm farther up than where I was when I slipped. I look down, to see Hook staring up at me. A green glow surrounds me, and my feet are kicking the empty air.

I'm not falling; I'm flying.

I'm not sure how I should react to this. I figured one could fly on Neverland. That's one of the biggest points of the story, after all. But the story also said that the dust that made you fly was from fairies, and you needed faith and trust.

_Then again, Pan is a decent person in the story, so I shouldn't expect the details to be correct._

I'm also pretty glad that I'm not falling to my death. That would be kind of nasty. On the other hand, I have absolutely no idea how to do more than hover, and I'm not sure how to do even that. And I have no idea how to land.

_Still, I'm actually flying. And, to be honest with myself, it feels pretty darn awesome._

So, I react as anyone would naturally react.

I throw back my head, let out a whoop of joy, followed by a round of necessary laughter.

Right, now that I've got that out of the way, how the heck do I get down?

Slowly, I find myself going down feet first.

_Okay, so I thought that I wanted to go down, and I went down. Lets try getting a hang of this so I'll know for next time._

_I want to go up._

Responding to my thoughts, I fly upwards, past where I was when I opened my eyes.

I can't help but grin, as I start learning how to slow down, to go left and right, to go faster…

"Are you done yet?"

I look down at Hook, who looks bored, but is watching me with warily. He's probably still concerned that I'm going to break my neck.

_Yeah, I kind of forgot about him while learning how to fly._

"You've got to try this!" I say in reply, as I allow myself to fly to another tree.

I catch a branch, and use it to propel myself upwards, like one might do with a swimming pool wall.

"Can't," Hook calls up. "Grown-up, remember? Now, are you coming down, or not?"

"Where's your ship?" I ask.

"About half a mile east of here," he answers. "Why?"

"Race you,"I challenge.

"This isn't a game, lass," he replies sharply.

I bite my lip when I realize he's right. This isn't a game. I'm flying like a flag up here, probably in sight of Pan and all the Lost Boys. I could be leading them straight to me and Hook.

Feeling slightly embarrassed for letting myself get carried away, I think how I want to land. Lightly.

In a couple of seconds, I'm on the ground, and the green glow fades. My skin now has what looks like glitter all over the place, but other than that, there's no sign of my flight.

"So, that was pixie dust?" I ask, brushing the sparkling dust off my arms.

"Aye," replies Hook.

I nod, but try to familiarize myself with the sense that the dust gave me. I have a feeling that I will need it later, and if I know the feeling, it'll be that much easier to find.

"Let's keep moving," Hook says, holding his lantern back up. "Preferably without climbing any trees this time."

"Only if I can't sense any magic around," I reply, half-joking.

If we do come across something that I sense has a good magic, then I'm going to try to find it.

Partly because I may be able to use it to escape, and partly out of curiosity. I certainly never sensed magic back home, which means that either there's no magic, or I can only sense magic in Neverland.

Either way, I'm curious to try out this new ability.

"I'm serious, lass," says Hook, as we continue walking. "If you hadn't touched that dust, you would've killed yourself."

_Technically, if I hadn't reached for the dust at all, I wouldn't have fallen, but I'm not going to bring that up. I'm not in the mood for a lecture. _

"Why are you so worried?" I ask instead. "I mean, you only met me less than twenty-four hours ago. It's not like you owe me anything."

"It would be bad form to leave a girl like you in Pan's grasp," replies Hook, shrugging.

_No, there's more to it than that. He's acting too casual. And just because it would be bad form doesn't mean he had to do it. _

"You still don't have to take me back to your ship," I point out. "If you just wanted to avoid bad form, then you could have always just have made sure I was alright, and moved on. But, you are obviously concerned about me, because you're taking me to your ship, at the potential risk of angering Pan. Why?"

Hook lets out an exasperated sigh, that tells me that he really wishes that I couldn't use logic that quickly.

_Hey, Pan said that Dreamers have logical trains of thought, and that I'm a powerful one. So, logically, that means I'm going to put things like Hook's concern over me together quickly. _

I decide it would be best not to push it by asking why again, but wait for him to answer.

"Like I said," he says, after a few minutes. "it would be bad form."

_Okay, I guess that he's not in the mood to tell me. _

Normally, I'd try pushing it, but seeing as Hook is my only ally right now, and he does seem genuinely concerned. So, I'm alright if he keeps his secret.

Besides, Pan could have ears all over the island. If it's important, best to keep it hidden. The less he knows about you, the less he can use against you.

We walk on in silence, until we come to a beach. A rowboat sits tied to the shore, and I can see Hook's ship not that far off.

"All aboard, miss," Hook says drily, as we climb in.

I take a seat in the back, as he unties the knot. I take a look at the boat.

It seems perfectly normal. Like any old rowboat you see in the movies. Something still seems odd about it.

As Hook pushes off, climbs in, and sits down, I realize what it is.

"Hook?" I ask. "How did you row over here with one hand?"

Hook doesn't reply. Instead, he turns his hook at an angle so that it holds on to one oar the same way his hand does. I cock my head, as he starts to row. He can turn his hook, apparently. Cool.

I wonder briefly how he got the hook. I mean, in the story, it got cut off by Pan, and tossed to a crocodile.

Obviously, though, the story is a lot different from the real thing. And even that part of the story seemed a little far-fetched.

_Then again, should I ask? I have kind of badgered him a lot…_

I sigh, as I suddenly hear what I've tried to block out all night. I can hear the children crying. Because I'm not there to help.

_Think about Abby,_ I tell myself. _She's probably crying now, because she knows you're trapped here. _

"What was that?" asks Hook, breaking the silence.

I look up, and realize I spoke out loud.

"Nothing," I reply.

Hook seems unfazed by the crying. I wonder if it has anything to do with how long he has been here. _Well, whatever he's doing, I hope he can teach me. Because I won't be able to stand night after night listening to the crying._

"Hook," I say. "How do you ignore the crying?"

"The what?" he replies.

"The crying," I repeat. "On the island."

Hook just turns to me and gives me an uneasy look.

"You can't hear it, can you?" I guess, heart sinking.

_I guess this is going to be one battle I have to fight on my own then. _

"I have no idea what you're talking about," he agrees, turning back to rowing.

I look back on the island.

"Some of the Lost Boys miss their families," I explain, thinking about the younger ones who wanted me to read to them. "When they go to bed, they start crying. I've been able to hear it since the shadow brought me."

_Hook probably thinks I'm insane. Maybe I am. Maybe these cries I've been hearing have just been in my head_.

Then again, I wouldn't know that any were crying when I first came. And I've been in that room, where all the children cry. So I know that they do cry.

_But, how can I hear it from here?_

I shake my head, unable to find an answer. Turning, I see we're pretty close to the ship.

"Well," says Hook, seeing where I'm looking. "There she is. The Jolly Roger."

I smile, noting the loving tone in his voice. This ship is pretty much his home, and he's proud of it.

"Oi!" calls Hook, "Where is my warm welcome? Am I going to have to tow our lovely guest up here myself, or are you going to make a good impression on her?"

There's a sound of scuffling, as Hook rows beside the boat. A rope ladder appears over the side, and Hook chuckles.

"After you, lass," he says, gesturing to the ladder.

"Are you going to keep your eyes where they belong?" I ask, playfully.

"A gentleman like me? Of course," replies Hook, spreading his hand and hook up innocently.

I smile, and start to climb up. A couple of ropes fall beside me, and Hook starts to tie the ends of the boat up. Probably to lift the boat back up onto the ship.

I'm midway up, when I stop.

I feel it again. That dark, twisted feeling that I always get around Pan.

_He's here. Or his shadow is. _

I freeze, trying to figure out what to do. He's here, and is probably going to wait to capture me again. I'm a little sick of this whole ring-around-the-rosy thing we have going on. I run, he finds me, captures me, I run again.

_However, he doesn't know that I'm aware of his presence. I can take him by surprise. _

_And if not…_

I look around at the ocean. There's no way I can make the swim back to shore. If I go aboard, Pan will have to leave. The trouble is getting him to leave without me.

"Lass?" asks Hook, noticing that I've stopped my climb. "Are you alright?"

"Yeah," I reply, lying through my teeth.

I really, really hate Pan right now. He always has to take me when things are at least feeling alright.

_Which is what he's trying to do,_ I realize. _He's trying to show me there's no security, except with him. _

_Like that'll ever happen._

I continue climbing, but imagine a knife as I do. He can try to take me.

Just let him try. I'm sick of this game, and I want to rest. If I have to fight him to get that respite, so be it.

I climb up, and hoist myself up on the deck.

I immediately look around, but I only see the same group of men that were there when I first met Hook. I see Smee, who is staring at me, and looking like he's seen the Ghost of Christmas Past. The sight is sort of ridiculous, and I can't help but smile at his squirming.

_The captain let me on the ship. He's going to have deal with it._

I don't see Pan or the shadow anywhere, though. But one of them is here; I can sense it.

Hook climbs aboard, as two of the crew members pull the raft back onto the ship.

"Well?" he asks, gesturing at the ship we stand on. "What do you think?"

I stop to actually look around.

The ship seems like any ship I've seen in the movies, but there is something else about it. There's something about it that feels like home. It's like going to a friend's house for a sleepover. It's not home, but it has a feeling that tells you that it is the home of someone else. And that makes it better.

"It's...wonderful," I say, taking in the feeling.

It's all the home I've got right now until I escape Neverland, so it feels great.

I still look around warily, waiting for Pan to jump out at me. Nothing.

"Let me show you around," says Hook, leading the way.

He starts a full tour, starting with some of the deck. We circle down to the lower levels, and then go back up, where he shows me the Crow's Nest, and the helm.

The wheel marks me as strange, not because it's the steering, but because of the wood beside it.

Carved into the wood is an arrow, in a circle, pointing north. An S and P label the left and right side. Starboard and Port. What's really strange about this carving, though, is that its been scratched out by something.

My fingers trace the jagged line, and I turn to Hook for an explanation. He simply shrugs and says it's always been like that.

Again, I can tell that he's lying.

I still can sense Pan, but I can sense him getting farther away. Maybe he's going back to the island.

Well, as long as its away from me, I can live with that.

As I open my mouth to explain this to Hook, Smee appears beside us.

"Er, Captain," he says, giving us a nervous glance. "A word?"

Hook looks from Smee to me, and I can tell he's put together what I have. Smee's probably worried that Pan is going to come and set a crocodile on the entire crew for giving me shelter.

"In a moment, Mr. Smee," replies Hook, turning to me.

"Tired?" he asks, catching my yawn.

I nod, not bothering to explain. It's been a long day. Being kidnapped, throwing poison at said kidnapper, meeting pirates, almost being drowned by mermaids, discovering magical powers, almost falling to my death and flying.

Yep; long, full day.

Hook gestures for me to follow, and leads me to one of the rooms we passed. He simply called them "quarters" but they look like they could be his. I'm kind of touched that he would let me use them.

"Thanks," I say, turning to him.

Not just for letting me use his room, but for everything. Giving me sanctuary from Pan, allowing me to stay at the risk of his men…

Hook just nods in acknowledgement.

"Well, someone has to be a gentleman on this cursed island," he replies.

I smile, but am only vaguely aware of what is happening as I bid him goodnight, and he promises to wake me if something is wrong. I just lay down, and close my eyes.

I'm so tired, I drift off instantly.

* * *

**A/N**: Well, at least Jess is feeling better.

Thank you **MarishkaTheUnderdog **and **dream lighting **for putting this story on alert, and to **dream lighting **and **savystories **for favoriting it. Also, thank you **FurySaidtoaMouse, meguhanu, Female whovian, storybrookering, Dreamer-Girl96, **and **Uncommon fairy **for your awesome reviews. And, as always, a special thanks to my amazing betas, **Can't-Escape-My-Fandoms **and **Uncommon fairy. **Kudos to **Female whovian, Dreamer-Girl96, **and **Uncommon fairy** for incorporating Princess Bride quotes into their reviews. Plato, Aristotle, Socrates? Morons, compared to y'all!

Also, a very happy birthday to my beta, **Uncommon fairy**! I couldn't have written this fic without you!

Please follow, favorite, review, or whatever y'all want to do! Opinions of Jess and Hook's relationship are greatly appreciated! **:) **


	11. Chapter 11

**Disclaimer: I still don't own OUAT. **

* * *

"Captain, _he_ was here," Smee said, as soon as Killian left the room.

Killian only paused for a moment, knowing exactly who "he" was.

"What did he say?" he asked, involuntarily looking back at his own quarters, where Jess lay, asleep.

"He said that the girl belonged to him, and that he wouldn't tolerate thieves in Neverland," Smee replied, also looking back at the quarters.

Killian immediately saw what his first mate was getting at.

He hadn't liked Bae's presence, either, because he was sure Pan would rip the entire crew's shadows off. He probably thought the same about Jess's presence on The Roger.

"Anything else?" he asked.

If Pan didn't give any outright threats, he could always argue that Pan didn't specifically say that he and his crew were thieves. Once or twice he was able to worm his way out of Pan's anger by playing on Pan's words. Pan, always appreciating a good game, would allow Killian to walk away.

"He said that betraying the girl will get you a reward," Smee explained. "And that if you try to keep her from him, he will have to take a crew member in turn."

There was that threat Killian had hoped to avoid. And it hit him where it hurt. His crew.

Since Liam's death on the island, Killian's crew had become his family. He had vowed never to return to Neverland, especially after hearing that the strange boy he and his brother had met was the infamous Pied Piper, who lured children away from their families to live on Neverland with him. After revealing this to the crew, all agreed again that none should ever set foot on Neverland's shores.

Then Milah was murdered.

Agony was not even close to what Killian had felt, when he saw the Dark One crush her heart without remorse. Killian was sure that he was going to die with Milah, as he watched the heart which he had loved for years, become ash in the crocodile's hand.

Her death had taken a toll on everyone. Milah was family to the crew, just as much as Killian. They all wanted to see the Dark One's corpse at their feet. He had heard the mutterings of crew members after her burial at sea, of deaths good enough for the crocodile. None had seemed good enough to Killian.

He knew only three things: the Dark One was immortal, he didn't know how to kill the Dark One, there was someone who may know how. If anyone knew how to kill the Dark One, it was the boy from Neverland.

So, he returned, but promising to himself that he would watch over the rest of his family in Neverland. He didn't know just how much danger he had put them in by returning to Neverland. And how much Pan would insist that they could not leave without his permission.

He lost several men-friends-to Pan, until he handed Bae over to him.

He had hoped, now armed with the knowledge of how to kill the Dark One, that he and the rest of his men would be able to leave Neverland. But every time they tried, Pan would kill more and more men. There were only seven members left, including himself and Smee. The dead's blood was on his hands.

Then he met the girl today. He had realized instantly that she was harmless, and that she was alone. He saw by the way she recoiled from Pan and the Lost Boys that she was as much a prisoner on Neverland as he was. That made her his ally. He knew that she would help him escape Neverland, because she wanted to get out herself.

But, when he saw her break down earlier, he had felt things he hadn't felt in a while. She was scared, hurt, and alone. Pan was toying with her head and feelings, and would not leave her alone.

When he and Pan talked before, he knew that Pan had plans for her, which meant Killian could use her as a bargaining chip at least.

But seeing her like that, he wanted to find Pan and hurt him so much, his grandfather would feel it. He didn't want to betray her to Pan, and was relieved that she had so willingly given him her trust.

_Maybe_, he thought, _by saving her,_ _I can wash away the blood of my crew. Maybe, I can redeem myself for not saving Milah. _

"Captain?" asked Smee, pulling him out of his thoughts.

"We're not handing her over," Killian said, firmly.

Smee looked stunned.

"Captain," he protested. "If we hand her over, Pan will help us. She has little value to us, and he obviously doesn't want her hurt. If we were to hand her over, we would be rewarded, and she wouldn't be in any danger."

Killian turned to him, almost angry.

_How could someone even think of handing anyone over to Pan, knowing that Pan would get under their skin like a knife through butter?_

"Not in danger," he repeated, incredulously. "Mr. Smee, there's only one place where she'd be in less danger, and that's at the Dark One's mercy. Would you hand her over to the crocodile, knowing what he would have in store for her?"

Smee looked away, and the other men looked at Killian warily.

"Gentlemen," said Killian. "What is the one principle we live by?"

"Good form," they all replied in unison, Mr. Smee shuffling guiltily.

Good. Despite all their time on Neverland, they hadn't lost what he had taught them.

"And is it good form to hand over a defenseless girl to the likes of Pan?" he asked.

The reply was not in unison, but muttered and hesitant.

_Unbelievable. Had they all considered giving Jess to Pan? Had their fear of him really affected them that much?_

"If my memory is correct," he continued, growing louder and more forceful."I'm still the captain, am I not? Well, I expect good form from all of you! The girl is not to be harmed in any way. You will not touch her, you will not say a single rude word to her, you will not even look at her if your mind becomes dirty. And you will not betray her to Pan. Doing so will be betraying me as well.

"Do I make meself clear?!"

The answer was a definite "Aye, Captain!"

Killian nodded, but couldn't fight the sense of déjà vu.

Hadn't he said something along those lines, before he handed Bae over? Wasn't he guilty of what they had just considered doing? How was he any different, if not more guilty?

_That was different,_ he told himself. _She's a girl. She isn't the Dark One's spawn. As far as I can tell, she isn't planning on stealing a cutlass and waving it at me for finding that sketch of Milah._

"Captain!"

Killian turned at the urgency in Smee's voice.

He saw at what Smee was pointing at, and felt his heart sink.

A light, on the sea, coming towards them.

To be sure, he pulled his spyglass out of his belt, and looked. Yes, it was the Lost Ones.

"They're coming for her, aren't they, Captain?" asked Smee, looking more frightened than usual.

They were. And if Killian didn't hand over Jess, they would not hesitate to kill any of them. And he wouldn't be able to kill the crocodile if he was dead.

"Wake her up," he ordered.

Smee, looking relieved, ran to the Captain's quarters, where Jess was. He probably thought they were going to betray her after all.

He didn't want to, but the Lost Boys may have gotten him, this time.

This was going to be interesting.

For a hint of courage, he took a swig of rum.

* * *

I wake up to Smee shaking me by the shoulder.

"Wake up," he hisses. "You have to get up."

I open my eyes, sit up, and yawn. I still feel very tired, and I don't think I slept that long.

That probably means something is wrong. I can tell by the urgency in Smee's voice.

"What is it?" I ask, climbing out of bed.

Almost instinctively, I search for the twisted feeling of Pan or his shadow, but get nothing.

"Come and see," he replies, leading me to the deck.

That isn't comforting at all.

Hook wouldn't wake me up for nothing, and I can't sense Pan…

I see the pirate standing on the left (_no, port_) side of the ship, and looking at something through his spyglass.

"What is it?" I ask again, hoping that Hook will give me a clearer answer than Smee.

"The Lost Ones," replies Hook, handing me his spyglass. "Guess they found you."

I look through, at the approaching light.

Sure enough, there's a raft of about seven or so Lost Boys, all armed to the teeth. At the head-surprise, surprise-is Felix.

I sigh, lowering the spyglass.

"What are you going to do?" I ask, turning to Hook.

Forget what he's going to do, what am I going to do?!

_I'm not just going to let Pan's legion of dorks take me back to his camp. He also is planning something else. He was here when Hook and I arrived, and could have taken me then. Why didn't he?_

"Pan wants me to hand you over," replies Hook. "It looks like this is his way of seeing if I'll come through."

_Right, Pan wants Hook to betray me so that I won't trust him. Funny thing is, since I know about it, it turns the plan around in Pan's face. I know that I can trust him._

"So hand me over," I reply, without hesitation.

Hook raises an eyebrow at me, and even Smee looks surprised.

"Look," I say, firmly. "Pan wants me to not trust you. I know that I can, but he doesn't know that. Hand me over, and Pan will have his 'betrayal' and I can just escape him and come back."

"Except he'll know the minute you're back," points out Smee.

I'm about to protest this, when I realize that the guy is right. It was no coincidence that Pan found me in Bae's cave. Or that he was here when I first arrived. But he couldn't have known that Hook would take me under his wing. He couldn't have known to come here.

_Maybe he tracked Bae and I, but he couldn't have tracked Hook and I that fast. It took him and the Lost Boys hours to do that, when I first arrived. And both times I was with Bae._

"So I'll hide out for a few days," I reply, shrugging.

"Lass, have you tried hiding from Pan?" asks Hook, looking at me like I'm crazy.

"Yeah, and I've done alright," I reply.

I look back at the lights that are getting closer.

"Look, I can take care of myself," I insist. "Pan wants me alive, and as much as he'll try to mess with my mind, even if he catches me, he won't hurt me. But if you don't hand me over, he will probably kill everyone on this ship, and take me anyway."

I look at Hook, hoping that he'll see that this is the only way that we can all hopefully get out alright. I may be in the hands of the Lost Boys, but at least I can try to escape them. If Pan was here, it would all be over, but I can probably take down a couple of Lost Boys.

_I hope._

Hook gives a sigh of resignation.

"Alright," he says. "Hide yourself below, and I'll tell them that you're here and all theirs."

"Ha," I say, though somewhat weakly. I really don't like the idea of being back in Pan's hands, but at least we're a step ahead of him, now.

"Lass," says Hook. "Are you sure that-"

"Yes," I say, cutting him off. "Pan will spare you if you comply, but he will kill you if you come between him and his weapon."

With that, I run below decks, to a small, hidden cellar Hook had shown me earlier.

I hide behind a sack of something smelly, and hold my breath. My heart seems to be pounding way too loudly.

_Please,_ I think. _Let this work. Let them buy it. _

I can vaguely make out voices, but can distinguish who is speaking, or what they're saying.

Come on, Hook. Don't back out to protect me. You won't win. You know that as much as I.

I hear footsteps above me, and bite my finger to keep myself from crying out.

_Yes, Hook came through. Now, I just have to escape Pan's minions. Pan's highly trained, psycho, ruthless minions, who probably think of me as the weapon they need to retrieve for Pan._

_Piece of cake, right?_

The trapdoor above me opens, and my mind whirls.

_I've got to get away, but after I'm off the ship. I need them to think that Hook has betrayed my trust. However, if we reach the island, Pan will probably have all sorts of lovely surprises in store. My best chance is to get away on the water._

_I'd have to-  
_

I'm pulled from my thoughts by two pairs of strong arms grabbing me around my forearms, and hoisting me to my feet.

Immediately, I start struggling, kicking, and screaming, as if I'm really afraid.

"No!" I shriek. "No, let me go!"The boys say nothing, but half carry, half drag me up to the deck. Their faces are hooded, but I can just tell by the hardness in their grips that these are a couple of the rougher ones.

"Found her," one grunts, as I'm pulled out to the deck, where the other Lost Boys wait.

"Hook," I say, acting like the panicked girl that I cannot be, if I want to live. "Hook, help me!"

Hook, not missing a beat, glances at me, somewhat guiltily, then turns to Felix.

"He'll be pleased?" he asks, purposefully avoiding looking at me. He's good at this.

"So long as you don't get between him and the girl," replies Felix, his monotone drawl the same as ever.

"Hook?" I ask, keeping up the act. "Hook, what are you doing?"

"Never knew Pan had a thing for girls," remarks Hook, ignoring me.

"If he needs them for his plans, he'll kill for them," retorts Felix, as the Lost Boys drag me to the side of the boat.

"I trusted you!" I shout, squirming against my holders' grips. "I trusted you to help me!"

"Sorry, lass," replies Hook. "But a man has to consider his priorities. And living is on the top of my list."

Before I'm dragged over the side of the ship, I give Hook a small, unnoticeable wink.

"Gently, Rufio," calls Felix, as they put me in the middle of the raft. "Pan wouldn't like it if his Dreamer got hurt."

I continue trying to struggle, but one of the Lost Boys shoves a sack over my face, effectively blocking my sight.

_Now that's just unfair_.

They don't bind me, but I can feel my burly guards sitting on either side of me. Any attempt to remove the sack won't go unnoticed. And by removing the sack, they'll know that I'm going to try to escape.

I could try escaping with the sack over me, but I won't be able to tell how close we are to shore, so I can know when to try to escape and swim.

I hear and feel the other boys climbing into the boat, and roaring away from the ship. I feel the back of my neck prickling, as if someone is watching me. Probably Hook, looking over the side of his ship.

I wait for a couple of minutes, before trying a different tactic: talking.

"Is this really necessary?" I ask to no one in particular. If I could see, I would direct the question at Felix, but being blindfolded confuses a person.

"Pan's orders," says the guy on my right. At least, I think its my right. I can't tell under here.

"Right, because blinding me will be really effective in convincing me that I want to stay with the Lost Boys," I reply, sarcastically.

Plus, it's hot under here. If I'm not sweating by now, I probably will in a minute.

"It's not supposed to convince you, Vin," says Felix's voice from...in front of me?

"Pan is mad at you. You ran away and left your younger brothers alone. Don't you hear them crying?"

_Yes, I hear them. I've heard them all night. But I'm not going to let Pan or his minions know how much it hurts. That is at least one pleasure I can prevent them from having._

"Like Pan cares about any of you," I say, bitingly. "To him, you guys are more weapons and tools than I am to him."

"Pan is our family!" Felix replies fervently.

_Whoa!_

_The guy _does_ have emotions._

"Oh please," I sneer. "Pan cares about no one but himself, and he is using you guys to get what he wants. He justifies it by calling it a family."

"Pan found those who were unloved, and unwanted," Felix says, almost passionately. "He gave them a family, and a home in Neverland."

He really believes it, doesn't he? He truly believes that Pan is his family.

"Oh?" I reply. "Is that what he said when he kidnapped Abby? 'Yeah, this little girl is unloved and unwanted, and totally wants to be here. We'll just tie her to a tree until her older sister gets here, because she is even more unloved and unwanted, and she'll practically beg to be one of us.'"

"Pan needs you," argues Felix. "He needs you to make sure that we don't lose our magic until he gets the heart of the truest believer."

_Okay, he lost me at the part of not losing magic. How does that even work? I can tell just by being here that Neverland is full of magic. Sure, using it may come more easily to me than to most, but Neverland is certainly not losing any magic._

"Right," I reply, sarcastically. "Because that totally justifies two kidnappings, manipulation, and who knows what else."

"At least Pan doesn't abandon us, like you did the younger ones," retorts Felix.

"If Pan weren't so insistent that he needed a Dreamer, those kids would be safe with their families, not crying because they're scared," I point out. "Besides, how can you argue that Pan cares for all of you if he allows the children to cry at night, instead of trying to help them himself?"

"Don't-," starts Felix.

I feel him stand up in the boat, causing it to shake under us.

_Now!_

I immediately imagine the sack off my head and over Felix's. Its easier than I would expect. I've focused on the picture of him standing up this entire conversation, and the darkness is just as good, if not better than having my eyes closed.

I've also been imagining the dim light of the stars, and the rafts light hitting my eyes, and the cool night air hitting my face. All I had to do was hold off until he was angry enough.

Within a second, the sack is not over me, but over Felix, the same way my hairband was out of my hair and on my wrist.

I've already steeled myself for the light and air, and waste no time.

Felix stumbles to the side in surprise, severely rocking the boat.

I dive to the side with him, and our sudden combined weight causes the raft to capsize.

All of us are plunged into the salty water, and I immediately duck under the boys, and break to the surface of the water.

The island isn't too far, but whether I can make it or not by swimming is an entirely different matter.

Either way, I duck back under the water, and start to swim.

I had the element of surprise on my side when I tossed the boat over. If I can escape now in the confusion...

I seem to be going into water a lot lately. Then again, I can't tell how much time has passed since I've been in Neverland.

At least two days.

I come up for air again, and check to see how the boys are doing.

They have the boat turned back up, and Felix is trying to direct them back into the boat. Two or three try to climb in from different sides, but slip.

One, whom I recognize as one of the guys who got me, tries to climb in with a few others from one side, but the boat just capsizes again.

I would laugh if it wasn't so important that I not be found.

I go back under, and start to swim. The salt water makes me more buoyant, so its harder to cut through the water by paddling and kicking, but at least the current helps carry me.

Once I get to shore, I'm going to be on the run. I don't want to endanger Bae, and I can't go back to the Jolly Roger for a few days at the least.

It will be hard, especially if Pan starts trying to track me. I really need to find out what exactly he did to be able to find me.

I feel something rush under me, and I immediately know what it is. Another mermaid.

I imagine a knife in my hand, and can feel it forming when one grabs me around the waist.

I open my eyes, and know the knife is in my hand.

_Let them try to kill me, I will dice them to little pieces of sushi._

I can't make out the features of the mermaid in the dim light, but I don't have too. I just need to know where to stab.

I kick out, and twist like an eel in her grip, before reaching out to stab.

Something grabs my arm from behind, and forces it back before I can stab my holder.

_Two of them. Crap._

I squirm in the two grips, when I feel another grab my other arm.

_No! I've come too far to drown like a rat!_

"Calm down."

I hear the voice on my right side. It sounds eerily melodic, and I have know idea how I can hear it underwater, but right at this moment, I don't care a bowl of sugar.

Suddenly, I feel the one who holds my waist grip my face tightly.

I continue to struggle and kick, when she kisses me on the mouth.

* * *

**A/N**: Uh-oh, something's getting fishy! Theories of what the mermaids are doing, anyone?

Just as a heads up, I'm starting to update every five days instead of every three days. Just so y'all know.

A special thanks to **Lovely-Daisy, Mehan-Smith, **and **Azulish** for putting this story on alert, and to **SunnySideUp25 ** for favoriting it. Also, thank you **Female whovian, **and **scorpiongirl92** for your awesome reviews. And, a big thanks to my betas **Uncommon fairy **and **Can't-Escape-My-Fandoms**! You guys are amazing, you keep my computer running!

Please follow, favorite, or review, or whatever y'all want! Opinion's of Hook's point of view are especially appreciated; he is such an awesome character! **:)**


	12. Chapter 12

**Disclaimer: I own OUAT, and Peter Pan. My lawyers are still slugging it out over Captain Hook, though. _  
_**

* * *

The shock is enough to make me stop for a split second.

_Did she just _kiss_ me? The creature that is trying to drown me? __That is wrong on _so_ many levels!_

Then I realize that I'm not being held anymore. And that my lungs, which should be burning for oxygen, are fine.

"What?" I murmur.

The word passes out as bubbles. And as soon as I've spoken, I inhale instinctively. The water turns to air as soon as it passes my lips.

The mermaids are still around me, as if waiting for me to react.

I look at them, and cock my head to the side. I can tell they disarmed me in the fight, and I imagine the knife back in my hand. Just in case.

"Did you do this?" I ask. Again, the words come out as bubbles.

"Our kisses prevent people from drowning," replies one, with long, flowing hair. "If you wanted to get back to shore, you would need our kiss."

_Apparently they can understand bubble talk_.

"So why kiss me?" I ask. "Didn't you try to kill me earlier."

"That was only Anemone," replies another mermaid on the side. "She believed that you and Pan were lovers, and attempted to kill you in a fit of jealousy."

_Okay, there are so many things wrong with that statement._

"Pan and I are NOT lovers," I say forcefully (which only makes bigger bubbles). "And if that's a new tactic he's trying-"

"Of course not," replies the last mermaid. "But our foolish little sister did not realize this. Nor did she realize the price of making Pan angry."

I pause.

_I know Pan saved me from drowning, and Bae told me that he went back underwater after saving me. Did he…_

_Did he kill her?_

"What happened to her?" I ask, unsure of how to react.

On the one hand, I'm alright by the idea that she won't be drowning any more people, but the thought that Pan killed her for me is terrifying.

"We don't know," replies the second mermaid. "He stabbed her, but our magic can only go so far. She may or may not make it."

_So Pan would nearly kill someone who almost killed me. What would he have done to Hook if Hook didn't "betray" me?_

"I'm sorry," I say.

_I'll let them interpret that as they will. Whether they take it as sorry for being the reason their sister could be dying, or that I'm sorry that their sister is suffering is up to them. I don't know myself._

"Don't be," replies the third mermaid, that has a...silver tail, I think. Tricky thing, moonlight. "Anemone disobeyed Pan. She paid the price. She isn't the first."

"If anything," the second one murmurs. "Pan was pleased."

"Pleased?" I repeat, unsure if I understood them. "Pan was pleased that I was almost drowned?"

"He was pleased that his toy was putting up such a fight," replies the long-haired one. "He says he has never had such fun with a Lost One in years."

I feel indignation slam into me full force.

"His _what_?" I ask.

If what they say is true, the mermaids aren't going to be the ones I cut to bits.

"His toy," the second repeats, sounding confused. "Were you not aware of this?"

"I am no one's toy!" I reply, practically feeling the steam pouring out of my ears.

_When I get my hands on him…_

"Yes, you are," insist the long-haired one. "You were brought to Neverland, were you not? You belong to him, the ruler of Neverland now. Normally, you would simply be a Lost One, but you resist. By resisting, you ask him to play. When he plays, you become his toy to play with, until you accept who you are."

"When hell freezes over," I mutter, waspishly.

"He says he enjoys this toy more than most," the silver tailed one says. "He says the longer you fight, the more fun it is-"

"To break me," I finish. "Yes, I've heard it."

_So, that's all it is? Holding me prisoner, trying to mess with my head. It's all a game to him. I am nothing but another trophy to add to his collection to him. The most powerful Dreamer in the world, to make him whatever he needs._

"Right," I murmur. "Well, I've taken up a lot of your time. Thank you for telling me this."

I start to swim away, back towards shore, while making the knife I summoned disappear.

"I wouldn't fight, toy," calls out one mermaid, as I swim. "The more you do, the more determined he becomes."

I know I shouldn't lose it, but this revelation is making me snappish.

"The next one to call me 'toy' is shark bait," I shout back, before swimming on.

Now that I don't have to come up for air, it makes the swimming easier. I let myself go up, just to see where I'm going, then I go back under.

As I swim, I start to think of what the mermaids said.

So, Pan thinks I'm his toy, which means that this is all a cruel game. What was that Felix said? Peter Pan never fails.

_Well, Pan better get used to taking back what he says, because he is going to fail with me. He's not going to make me one of his brainless minions._

But, at the same time, he needs me alive, and will kill those who try to kill me.

This means that he needs me for something beyond just using my powers as a Dreamer. The reason he abducts the loved ones of Dreamers, the reason he forces them to make a deal with him, his plans for me, I'm sure they're all connected.

_Well, for all I care, Pan can shove his plans where the sun doesn't shine. I'm not going to allow myself back in his hands anymore._

If he thinks that I'm his toy, then I'm going to teach him the difference.

Toys are objects you pick up and play with.

People, however, fight back and run when they are reduced to objects.

_So, I will run until I'm off Neverland. Until Pan realizes it's not a toy he's dealing with, I'm never going to stop fighting and running._

With this thought in mind, I reach the shore.

Immediately, I run into some foliage, and imagine clothes that are better fit for trekking through Neverland's jungle. Simple black sweatpants, a comfortable t-shirt, a light jacket (just in case), clean socks, and hiking boots.

I change into these, and imagine that my old clothes are dry and clean.

Folding them up, I imagine a backpack, and put my clothes in, along with the essentials I imagine.

A water bottle, band-aids, granola bars and trail mix.

I can imagine things like a tent and a sleeping bag later. I'd rather not be lugging those through the jungle.

I'm going to have to be on the move at all times, until I know it is safe to definitely return to Bae or Hook. I may be able to visit, especially if I find more pixie dust, but for now, I have to be on my own.

I toss the backpack over my shoulders, and turn at my wet, sandy footprints.

As a final safety measure, I make them disappear. However Pan is tracking me, I don't want it to be that easy.

With that done, I go farther into the jungle.

_Time to disappear._

* * *

I'm not sure how long I wander.

Definitely for several hours, possibly for a whole day. Come to think of it, how long have I been in Neverland?

I stop periodically to rest, relieve myself, eat a granola bar or some trail mix, and to try to figure out where I am.

None of this place looks familiar, and I don't think for a moment that I've seen all Neverland.

I try to keep alert, listening for Lost Boys who may be searching for me, or tracks that tell me that they are nearby.

A few times, I try to use my new sixth sense to find out if there is magic nearby, but find nothing.

Part of me wonders how exactly I'm going to get back.

I can try using the shadow, but I wouldn't trust that thing if my life depended on it. Bae said he had a couple of ideas that almost worked, so I can try seeing him sometime, and ask what they were. They may end up failing, but at least I'll have a general idea of what to try.

A couple of times, I sense Pan or the shadow, not too far away. I immediately backtrack, and go the opposite direction.

My tracks have disappeared behind me since I set out, but until I find out how Pan is finding me, I'm not taking any risks.

After walking for what feels like miles, my need to sleep finally catches up on me.

I haven't really got to sleep. Just rest.

I try to find a place that would give me the tactical advantage should the Lost Boys show up. Someplace where I won't be easily seen, and can easily get away when the time comes.

But after a few more minutes, I'm ready to faint.

I need sleep _now._ Real sleep, not just a few minutes here and there.

But I can't go to sleep here. I'll be seen.

_Then make something that won't be seen, stupid!_

I stop at the thought.

_That's right. I am supposedly the most powerful Dreamer yet. Theoretically, couldn't I make something that can't be seen?_

_It's worth a shot, because I'm about to die of exhaustion._

I imagine a tent, like one used in a camping trip. A flashlight inside, and a sleeping bag and pillow. But it cannot be seen on the outside. It, and everyone and everything inside are invisible.

I open my eyes hesitantly, and can't see anything.

_Did it work?_

I hesitantly reach out, and feel the canvas under my fingertips.

As a precaution, I imagine a circle in the ground, with about a twenty-foot radius.

If anyone unwanted crosses, I will be woken up.

Satisfied with the results, I unzip the tent (finding the zipper takes forever), and see the inside behind.

I climb in, and zip the tent shut, making me and the inside invisible.

With that, I settle down, close my eyes, and get some much-needed sleep.

Whether I sleep well is an entirely different matter. No sooner do I fall asleep then dreams come.

* * *

_A woman with long raven hair walking beside a light-haired man make their way through a forest. Both are silent, as if lost in their own thoughts, yet they keep trying to subtly glance at the other when they think they are not looking. Eventually, they walk down a path, and stop at the sight of a palace in the distance. _

_The man turns, and hands the woman a small bag. The sound of coins jingling breaks the silence. _

_"You'll probably want this," he says. _

_She blinks, as if remembering the bag for the first time. _

_"Right, the gold," she says, almost reminding herself. "Thank you. And, um, you can't get married without this."_

_She hands him a pouch, that she was carrying, which he accepts. Reaching in, he takes out a simple, yet pretty, silver ring set with a green Peridot. Both he and the woman look at it, as if taking in all that it implies. _

_"I know," says the man, misinterpreting the woman's look. "Not your style." _

_The woman shrugs, and takes the ring. _

_"Only one way to find out," she replies, slipping the ring on her finger. It's a perfect fit. For a moment, both the man and woman stare at the ring, then meet each other's eyes. _

_Eventually, the woman looks away, and pulls the ring off. _

_"Yeah, not me at all," she says, sounding like she's trying to convince herself more than him. _

_With that, she hands him back the ring._

* * *

I wake with a start. Blinking, I sit up, and look around. _What?_

That's when I feel it.

I sense magic again. But not twisted magic, like Pan's. Good magic, like the pixie dust. Except its moving.

Moving, not far from me. Almost twenty feet.

I suddenly sense it crossing the line I made before I went to sleep.

_But I made it so that I would feel if anyone unwanted crossed. So how am I feeling this good magic move, and yet it's unwanted?_

I debate whether I should follow or not. On the one hand, anyone unwanted would generally mean that I'd want to stay away. On the other, I can't believe this good feeling I'm getting can be unwanted.

_Well, it may help me against Pan..._

I grab my backpack, and climb out of the tent.

I imagine it disappearing, and reach out to be sure. My hand touches nothing but empty air. The tent is gone.

I turn, and start to pursue the sense. I'm not sure why I'm so intent on following, especially if it may be bad.

Then again, if it is bad, I can always turn and run.

Whatever it is, it isn't going that fast. Just walking.

I feel it, maybe ten feet ahead.

Looking up in the shadows, I see a small figure.

Definitely not a Lost Boy, but not one of Hook's men either.

They carry themselves in a way that says they are always on the look out for danger.

As I get closer, I see it is actually a woman, maybe in her late twenties.

She is wearing a green dress and leggings, and her blonde hair is tied up in a bun. She has a knife strapped to her belt, which tells me that startling her may not be the best idea if she knows how to use it.

She is carrying a basket of plants in her arms, and doesn't seem to be aware of me.

I decide it would be best to follow from a distance. It may not be the best idea to draw attention to myself if she turns out to be bad.

Just slowly, quietly follow her.

Right at that moment, my foot loudly snaps a twig.

_Oh, dang it._

The woman immediately drops her basket, pulls out her knife, and turns to see me.

_Double dang._

"Who are you?" she demands, in an accent I don't recognize.

"Easy," I say, holding up my arms in front of me. "I'm Jess Lancaster. I'm not trying to hurt you."

"Then why are you following me?" she asks.

_Yeah, that is what I was doing, wasn't it? Probably looks very suspicious._

"I know what this looks like," I say, trying to be reassuring. "I can't explain it, but I sensed you coming by. I sensed that you had magic. Good magic. I was curious and I followed you."

The woman squints at me, as if she may or may not believe me.

"I don't have magic," she says. "But I make sure that I'm never around where the Lost Boys are."

"I'm not one of Pan's people," I assure her. "Trust me, I'm trying to get away from him."

"Why?" she asks.

"Because I'm a Dreamer," I reply. "I'm apparently pretty powerful in Neverland. He wants me to work for him so he can use me as a slave. But, ever since I was brought to Neverland, I've been able to sense magic, and whether it is good or bad. And I sensed yours was good."

She still is looking at me suspiciously. I'm wondering whether I should just screw it and leave, but part of me wants this woman to trust me.

"I swear, I'm telling the truth," I insist.

She sighs, and lowers the blade. I can tell that she thinks it's against her better judgment.

"I don't have magic," she repeats, in a bitter voice. "It got taken from me."

_I don't think so. It's not like I only feel a trickle or anything. This woman has plenty of magic inside of her._

When I tell her this, she only shakes her head.

"What you feel is probably a trace of what I once had," she says, sadly.

"How did you get your magic taken from you?" I ask, trying not to be rude. I don't want to pry, but I just want to know how she's so sure.

I haven't had this ability for very long. I may not be sensing magic, but a trace, like she said.

The woman glances at me, before sighing.

"I helped someone who didn't deserve it," she replied. "I put everything on the line to help, but in the end, I lost everything."

Her shoulders roll as she's saying this.

The movement is like unfurling...wings on your back.

_The green clothes...movements like wings...once had magic...no way!_

"You're TINKERBELL?!" I say, unable to believe it.

She stops, and still looks at me suspiciously.

"How do you know my name?" she asks.

I'm practically bouncing. Forget Wendy and Tiger Lilly, Tinkerbell was always my favorite in the book. I've given up on the cheesy Disney movie since I realized Hook doesn't have a perm.

"Um, there's this story, in my world," I explain, trying not to make it sound crazy.

_What am I saying? I'm talking to Tinkerbell! It's already crazy._

"Peter Pan, the Lost Boys, Captain Hook," I continue. "They're all in it. So are you. And you're pretty awesome in the story."

She looks confused, but mildly flattered.

"Wait," I say. "You don't have magic? That can't be true."

_Now that I know who she is, I can't deny it. There is definitely magic inside her. Maybe she doesn't know it, but she has it. Tinkerbell without magic is like lightning without thunder: impossible._

"Yes," she replies. "I don't know what exactly this story of yours said about me, but its wrong."

She looks at the ground, almost in defeat.

"I'm just a stupid former fairy who tried to do some good in the world and got her wings taken away for it."

"But I can sense it," I insist. "You have magic. Lots of it. You just don't realize it."

She sighs, and rolls her eyes.

"Even with magic, I couldn't use it," she argues. "Fairies can only use magic if they have a wand or dust."

_Dust? Why would she need dust? Oh, yeah. Faith, trust, and pixie... wait…_

"Dust?" I repeat. "As in pixie dust?"

"Yes," she replies, gathering up her basket. "And I don't have any. So even if I have magic, like you say, I can't use it."

Her tone tells me that she wants this conversation to end, but I refuse to let her give up so easily. As long as I'm trapped, I may as well help someone who Pan won't use against me.

"What if I told you that I knew where to get some dust?" I ask, as she's about to turn to leave.

She pauses. Yes, I have her attention.

"If you do," she says, "and you bring me some, I will be grateful. If I still have magic, that is. But I've spent years on this island, without finding any dust. I'm not getting any hopes up."

_No. It's not supposed to be like this. The Peter Pan good guy, Hook bad guy swap I'm okay with, but Tinkerbell giving up? Seriously, what diluted person told J. M. Barrie about Peter Pan?_

She turns to me, and probably catches my expression.

"I'm sorry to disappoint you," she says sincerely.

"It's not your fault," I reply. "I guess I'm upset that I was misinformed."

She smiles sympathetically.

"You seem like a nice girl, Jess," she says. "Trust me, you don't want to be on Neverland. If you came here because you thought it would be like your story, then get off, and just read that story."

"I'm trying," I reply. "You wouldn't happen to have any ideas, would you?"

She shakes her head.

"I'm sorry," she says, "but I came to Neverland to be left alone. Because people who usually enter Neverland don't come out."

"Helpful," I reply, half-heartedly.

We bid each other a polite good-bye, and I watch her leave.

She has magic. I can feel it. She just needs something to show her.

And I know where to go to get that.

Without a second thought on whether it's a good idea or not, I start to search for the tree with the pixie dust.

I'm not sure why I'm so intent on helping her. Maybe because I can't help the Lost Boys, and this is my way of making up for that.

I try to follow my sixth sense to determine where the tree is. It takes me a while, but I finally feel it again, faintly. It means that there's a long walk ahead of me.

For at least an hour, I hike through the jungle, through the foliage. Yes, the feeling is stronger.

The place looks familiar. Hook and I were walking past here earlier.

Eager, I run forward, to the tree. The feeling of the good magic is strong.

So much, that I nearly miss it.

The dark, twisted feeling of Pan and his shadow.

He must have seen me tense, because I hear his voice.

"You know, I've never had to be on the run much, so I wouldn't know. But, to me, going back to a place that I've already been to, seems a little stupid, wouldn't you say?"

I turn to face him, behind me. Pan is casually leaning against a tree, grinning impishly at me.

I'm only able to get one clear thought across: _Holy. Crap._

* * *

**A/N: **Yes, a cliffhanger. I'm mean like that.

Thank you **horsez913, Female whovian, SoleFaith, lovefromitaly, wireless-bird, Iisafreakingninja, .Purple, **and **MidnightRose29** for putting _Fading Away _on story alert, and thank you **Female whovian, Iisafreakingninja,** and** MidnightRose29 **for favoriting it. Also, thank you to **Female whovian, Dreamer-Girl96, SoleFaith, scorpiongirl92, meguhanu,** and **BlueRose1880 **for your awesome reviews. And, of course, thank you **Uncommon fairy, **and **Can't-Escape-My-Fandoms, **my amazing betas. Also, I want to give a big shout out to ouattranscripts, whose website helped me so much with the dream scene. Y'all are amazing. Thank you very much!

Please follow, favorite, review, or whatever y'all want! Thoughts on the dream, Tinkerbell, and the mermaids are especially appreciated! **:) **


	13. Chapter 13

**Disclaimer: Do we have to do this? Seriously? It's so depressing...**

**A/N**: I know I don't usually put these at the beginning, I just wanted to let y'all know: the part with Pan's POV is a little dark. Just to give y'all a heads-up. If you do read the scene though, I'd recommend listening to **Where is the Edge** by Within Temptation with it. Anyway, on with the story!

* * *

"You know, I've never had to be on the run much, so I wouldn't know. But, to me, going back to a place that I've already been to, seems a little stupid, wouldn't you say?"

I turn to face him, behind me. Pan is casually leaning against a tree, grinning impishly at me.

I'm only able to get one clear thought across: _Holy. Crap._

"Well, you would know a lot about stupidity, wouldn't you?" I retort, pushing my fear aside.

Honestly, I'm stalling. The problem is that I can't imagine a knife without closing my eyes (I'll have to work on that), but closing my eyes means not watching him. I can't afford to risk that.

He chuckles at my reply, and straightens.

"How are you finding me?" I ask, bluntly.

I'm not in the mood for banter, and I need to know.

He doesn't even seem taken aback.

"Right to the point then, Vin?" he asks.

He pauses, almost as if waiting for me to protest that my real name is Jess, but I'm not going to play his game.

"Let's make it a game," he continues. "A puzzle to solve."

I snort at this.

"Right," I mutter, "because that's all life is to you, isn't it? Just one big game. And we're all your toys."

"Now you're getting it," he says, smiling.

He doesn't even try to deny it. And yet, the Lost Boys will remain faithful to him.

_This guy seriously needs to get a life. _

It doesn't seem like he's telling me how he's finding me. He wants me to figure it out. To see if I'm really the brilliant Dreamer he says I am.

"Alright," I say, crossing my arms. "Let's see. You found me when I was with Bae. But that was hours after you saved me from the mermaid. Bae said that I had been out for a while, so you would have found me long before if you were having me followed. But it only took you ten minutes at the most to find me, but that was _after_ I woke up."

I look up to Pan, who is watching, still smiling. He gestures for me to continue.

"So, I have to be awake for you to find me," I continue, my arms uncrossed. "You also went to the Jolly Roger before I got on board, and left when I arrived. That means you knew where I was headed, which means that you knew that I was with Hook. And he had been on the island to talk to you. But, you didn't know that our paths would cross. The way I was going was too random."

I think I may be onto something, so I continue, pacing across the clearing.

"You could have grabbed me while I was with Hook. But you didn't. Instead you were on the Jolly Roger, probably to make sure that I was there. Then you sent in the Lost Boys to get me. Hook betrayed me, which is what you wanted, because you tried to get him to do it earlier. This time he actually came through."

That should be enough for him to believe that Hook's "betrayal" was genuine. I can't let him know that Hook and I are actually a step ahead of him.

"But, you didn't know I was with Hook, for a while. And when you did, you waited until I was onboard."

_Why? Why would he wait onboard, and then send the Lost Boys to find me? Why would he leave when I knew he was there?_

_Why would Pan let me get close to Hook, when he was trying to get me to trust no one but him?_

_Wait…_

I stop, dead in my tracks, and realization creeps in.

"That's it!" I exclaim. "You always wait until I feel safe and secure. I was with Bae, and I felt safe in his hideout. Both times, you or your minions found me. You waited until I felt at home on the Roger. You left so I would feel safe. And you are trying to convince me that the only place safe is in your camp. But, you only come when I feel secure, not before! Which means that you can't find me until I feel safe!"

I stop, and turn to him, grinning in triumph._ Point to Jess._

"Am I right?!" I ask, knowing that I am.

Pan gives me a mocking round of applause.

"Very, very good, Vin," he says, half sarcastically, half gleefully. "I knew you could do it."

"You were the one who left all the evidence," I point out. "My only question is how you are able to come and go so fast."

"What?" he asks.

He suddenly vanishes from where he was standing, and appears inches away from me.

"Like that?"

I back away, trying to keep distance between us. Last couple times he was this close, he brought me to the camp, and I threw two or three knives at him. The more distance, the better.

"What, Vin?" he asks, seeing me back up. "Are you scared? Going to run?"

I shake my head.

"I'm done with running, Pan," I reply. "Because running makes it look like you're winning. That you are really getting to me. But you're not."

_I figured out his puzzle. And it was him who made the first mistake. I can beat him, and I plan to. _

_And after he called me his toy, I am not going to allow him to think of me that way anymore. Toys let you play with them. People fight._

"How about this?" I say, telling myself to stand firm. "Instead of us chasing each other like cats and dogs, why don't we stop and fight each other?"

He pauses, and arches his trademarked eyebrow.

"Fight each other?" he repeats. "Seems a little unlike you, Vin."

"No magic," I insist. "Just you and I. No killing. You win, and I go back to your camp without a struggle."

I can just escape later, if he does win. He needs to know that I won't stand for him treating me like an object.

"And if I win, I get to walk away, until next time," I finish.

Pan seems to consider this, while I set my backpack down. The look on his face is a mixture of surprise and thoughtfulness. Evidently, this is a surprise to him. It's a surprise to me.

What feels like years ago, I was worried about writing two essays, answering study questions, and studying for a killer history test. Now, I am challenging a fairy-tale character to fight one-on-one, so that he will let me leave.

_Is this really what it's like for characters in all the stories? Not happily ever after, but always on the run, always trying to escape the psychopaths?_

"Alright," he agrees.

He looks at me, curiously, and cocks his head.

"This very unlike you, Vin," he notes.

"You'll find that I am willing to go through many lengths to get out of this place, Pan," I reply.

He smirks at this.

"Unfortunately, Vin, I-"

I cut him off by barreling into him, slamming him down on the ground. I have the element of surprise, and I'm now on top.

My first thought: _get his knife._

But he recovers quickly. He grabs my upper arm, and turns us over, so that he's now on top. His adjusts his grip, so that my wrists are pinned down.

I knee him in the groin, and wrap my legs around his torso. He is slightly off, with my kneeing him, and I use it to turn us over.

I slam my knuckles into his windpipe, and try to grab the knife. His hand grabs my wrist as I try to draw it, and he uses me to pull himself up, and pull me down.

Quick as a snake, he painfully twists my arm behind me, and forces me to bend down even more. I go limp, and purposely bend down further, taking him with me. Then, I jerk up, so my head rams into his nose.

It's enough for his grip to slacken, and I turn and hit the nose with the tightened palm of my hand. That should be enough to get his eyes watering.

I don't dare go for the knife, but try to get him down.

I kick him in the shin, and use my foot to sweep around and try to take out his feet from under him.

He avoids the second kick, and makes a grab at me.

I duck under, but he immediately turns, and wraps his arm around my neck, forcing me against him.

I stamp on his foot, and twist my body against his. Grabbing his upper arm, and using the momentum, I'm able to throw him off, to the ground.

I push away, when I notice it, slithering like a snake towards me. A vine from the pixie dust tree.

_Wait a second…_

I bend down, and place my hands on my knees, and pant. I'm out of breath, and the struggle is harder than I thought.

Pan sees his chance, and charges me.

I wait until he is about to grab me, when I duck under him, twist around, and shove him into the tree.

Instantly, the vine wraps itself tightly around him, pinning him to the tree, with his back towards me.

I step back, and inhale, grinning.

I won the fight. _Point to Jess._

"Oh, very clever, Vin," he says, shifting his head to the side, so it's not smushed against the tree. "Using the tree against me? Nice use of what's around you."

"I know," I reply.

I take a second to savor the moment of my victory and his loss.

Then, I stride over to him, and remove his knife.

"A souvenir of our little fight," I say, calmly. Actually, the truth is I don't want to get too addicted to using Neverland's magic, and it'll be nice to have a weapon to hold onto.

"As you rightfully earned," concedes Pan.

_Oh, how did that taste coming out? _I wonder.

I smile, and pick up my backpack, slinging it over my shoulder. I know I didn't get pixie dust for Tinkerbell, but I can do that later. I'm not climbing anything with Pan tied to it.

"Alright, Vin," says Pan. "You win. Now cut me loose."

I stop, and turn to him. _He must be crazy._

"I'm not stupid, Pan," I tell him, as I turn to walk away.

"No," he replies. "You've earned the right to run. Fine. But cut me loose, first."

"Why?" I ask. "So you can just grab me as soon as you're free? Just go back on our deal? I don't think so, Pan."

"Vin, I promise," insists Pan, his voice taking an urgent tone. "I will let you go. Just help me get free first."

The vines tighten around him, and I see that he is struggling.

"Forgive me if I don't trust you," I reply dryly, turning to walk away.

"Vin, please!" he shouts. "Please, help me!"

I pause on the brink of decision.

_He sounds genuinely scared. And he is actually asking me to help him. But, I know him. He wouldn't beg to save his own mother's life. _

_He will only betray me when I help him. This is my chance to get away. I need to take it now. _

I keep walking.

"Vin!" he cries after me, panic now fully in his voice.

"I promise, I'll let you go, if you just help me this once. I won't bother you again, I swear!"

I pause again. _The desperation in his voice…_

_No. I can't trust his promises. Didn't he tell me himself that promises can be broken in Neverland?_

_He's lying. He is only trying to play on my nature, like he is with the Lost Boys. _

I walk on, almost out of the clearing.

"VIN!" he calls, practically screaming. "I'LL LET YOU GO HOME! I'LL RESTORE YOU TO ABBY! I'LL GIVE YOU ANYTHING YOU WANT, BUT PLEASE, LET ME GO!"

I clench my hands into fists.

_How dare he? How dare he use Abby against me? How dare he use my need to escape to get me to do his bidding?_

"You're lying," I reply, my voice surprisingly cool.

I turn to him, and I see the panic on his face. I don't buy it for a second. It's all an act.

"If you truly meant it," I continue, icily, "you would have called me by my real name. I'm Jess, Pan, not Vin."

With that, I turn and walk away.

I hear him rapidly breathing, as if in apprehension, and struggling against the vines, and it sounds like the vine is wrapping itself around him even tighter.

"JESS, PLEASE!" he shrieks.

Of course he's going to try that, now that I've told him.

_But the fear in his voice...the panic._

_No. I can't do it. I won't do it. _

I will not allow him to use my nature against me, because I won a fight fairly. That's probably more than he can ever say for himself.

As I walk away, I hear him whimpering. Whimpering! I think Pan would stab himself before he went so low.

The whimper become cries, but I block them out.

_He is only tricking me. He's only trying to prove he can read me like an open book. That I'm his toy. I'm not in control._

Like the cries of the children, I block out Pan's cries, and walk on.

I can't go after Tink without the dust, so I may as well try to find Bae. I need his thoughts on how to escape.

* * *

Peter had always made it a principle to avoid The Tree.

After he abandoned Rumple, the shadow had told him that the tree had also changed. It now fed on the regret of anyone who touched it.

For a while, he wasn't able to fly, without risking to touch it. Then the vine would emerge, and try to feed off his regret.

When he made the Lost Boys, he would send them to get pixie dust, as The Tree didn't feed off of anyone with little to no regret.

And as much as he denied it, he knew that he was filled to the brim with it.

So, when Vin shoved him into The Tree, he panicked.

Because for The Tree to feed on your regret, it had to draw it out. You had to face every last regret you had ever had.

He had _begged_ her. He, Peter Pan, the king of Neverland, and leader of the Lost Boys, went so low, as to beg a _girl_ to help him.

_Surely_, he had thought, _she would see that it needs to be done. That she has to get me away from The Tree. She knows I would let her go on afterwards._

He had felt The Tree, starting to bring forth the pain. The regret.

And she had walked away.

Then, it began.

The Tree started with his childhood.

Every time he failed to do a chore to his father's satisfaction, every time his mother gave him a disappointed look for getting into trouble, every time his older brother told him that he wasn't doing something right.

Every time he had done something, and had wished he hadn't. It all came to life in his eyes, and came at him full force. All the times he had stolen from someone, and had felt that twinge of remorse that he learned to ignore, came forward, and hit him as if the only thing he had ever felt was regret.

He felt tears streaming down his face, as The Tree forced the memories forward, and devoured them.

Then it moved on to when he was older.

His master, the blacksmith, always shouting when he failed at a task. When his work was not good enough to sell. When he slept late, when he ate too much, when he seemed too unimportant to be seen when his master was making a big sale. When he had stolen his master's most prized possessions and sold them for revenge, and ignored the twinge again. And even worse, when he learned that his master was trying to sell the goods for a good price, so that the money could save his ailing nephew, who was like a son to him.

_A son that he, Malcolm, could never be._

Peter cried out, rather in remorse, pain, or sorrow, he did not know.

He was no longer aware of the vine tightly wrapped around him, nor of The Tree. He just felt the pain, the regret, more magnified than it ever was when it happened.

It ate at his soul, and threatened to devour more.

Then, The Tree moved on to later.

Every scam of Follow-the-Lady, that had robbed some man of his coin, he felt sorrow. Whenever he came home to Esme' and saw her shame and disappointment that the husband she was forced to marry could not make an honest living for her or for Rumple. Every betrayed look on Rumple's face when he saw that his father was nothing more than a coward and thief.

Then…

_No,_ thought Peter, fear flooding him. _No, please, not that! _

Coming home to find Rumple crying on the floor, with his mother dead in bed. She had been so sick, so tired, and he hadn't even noticed anything was out of the ordinary.

_Esme'! Esme', I'm so sorry!_

Esme' had died in front of her son, without her husband to help her move on. She had apparently sent someone to find him, but they couldn't. He moved around too much.

_I'm sorry…_

Peter was vaguely aware of voices around him, but he was too ripped apart to understand what was going on. He could only understand what The Tree was forcing him to experience.

But The Tree was now moving on to the main course.

The regret of leaving his son with some strange women, whom he had only heard to take children on without question. Playing Follow-the-Lady, when he promised to find honest work for his son. Because the scam was so much easier than work. Then, seeing the disappointment on his son's face. Knowing that he was a failure of a father.

Peter cried out in fear, knowing what was next.

The remorse in trying to force his son to climb The Tree. And climbing down.

And letting the shadow take his own son.

He had chosen to give up his only flesh and blood to become young again. The pain it gave him was like ripping out every internal organ, and replacing it with ice.

_Empty, cold, and harsh. _

_I am so, so sorry, Rumple. So sorry…_

He had traded his own son for youth.

The Tree moved on to desert.

He had abducted children and brainwashed them. He was willing to take his own grandchild if he had too. He was forcing them to fight, and kill, and calling it a family. Even now, he was trying to convince an innocent girl to give up the family she had willingly sacrificed herself for, and start a new one with him.

He had thought it would end then and there, but it did just the opposite.

The Tree, not finding anymore regret in his past, went after his ability to regret with a ravenous hunger.

He was filling regret over nothing, sorrow over emptiness. He was nothing more than a shell, emptied of the few things that made him human still. It gnawed at his soul, and swallowed it whole. His entire being became regret, and it was ripping him apart. Remorse for what he had done, what he was doing, and what he could do. Regret for what he was.

_A failure, a liar, a thief, and a coward._

He was a horrible son, a terrible apprentice, a failure of a father, and the loosest definition of a person.

Then, there was nothing.

He felt the vine unravel itself, and let him collapse.

"Pan?"

He was vaguely aware of Felix's voice, along with Rufio, and Marcus.

He realized there were still tears running down his face. He wiped them away before the boys could see, and with an effort, stood up.

"What happened?" he asked, feeling exhaustion replacing the pain.

"We tried to cut you loose, but the vine would not give in," replied Felix. "But, you were crying, moaning, and yelling that you were sorry."

Pan grit his teeth.

He had cried. He had acted like a weakling. It was a good thing it was these boys who were die-hard loyal to him, not the ones who taunted anyone who acted weak.

If they had seen, everything would have fallen apart.

"How did you-," started Rufio, in his deep voice.

"Vin," replied Pan.

_Yes, it had been Vin who did this. It had been her fault he had made a fool of himself. _

_But, was that a problem, really?_

Hesitantly, he thought about Rumple.

He had traded him for youth. He had let his own son go...and he no longer felt remorse.

He thought how he hadn't been there for Esme': _no sorrow. _

Trading his master's goods for revenge: _no regret. _

He felt no regret at all, for any of his deeds. Or for what he was doing.

The Tree had taken away his ability to regret.

Now, all he had was...desire, curiosity, pleasure, anger, glee, and ambition.

He had no remorse. And now that he thought about it, he really didn't need it. Remorse blinded him, made him weak, slowed him down.

And now, he was free of it.

"I begged her, Felix," he said, smiling coldly. "I _begged._ Like a dog. And she walked away."

Felix brandished his club, and looked murderous.

"Where is she?" he snarled. The others did the same.

"Now, now, boys," said Pan, soothingly. "Let's be fair. She didn't know what it would do. She didn't understand what she was doing. If she did, she would have freed me."

How had he gone on all these years with remorse? Now that he was free of it, he saw what a burden it was.

_I should have done this ages ago,_ he thought.

"But she did prove something to me," he muttered, his voice now taking a dangerously low tone. "She proved that she was willing to do anything to get out of her captivity. What's more, she showed me that it's time to stop playing nice."

He had given her a chance. She could have joined of her own free will. She could have tried letting herself in. He had tried being nice. He had offered her a family, a chance to be happy. He may have even let her keep her name. But, no, she insisted that she had to get back to her sister. _Her mistake._

"The game is going to change, boys," he said. "We've been playing nothing but nice with her. Let's show our Lost Girl what happens when you push Peter Pan too far."

* * *

**A/N: **Dunh, DUNH, **DUUUNNNHHH! **

Whoo! So this chapter was super hard to write. I honestly wasn't planning for this chapter to happen, but it sort of all came together when I had a bad case of writer's block. Putting this scene down on paper was a very tough job. Feedback is really appreciated, because Pan-in my opinion-was one of the show's best villains and I want to do him justice.

Anyway, a special thanks to **SkyeShield **and **flagurl1j** for putting this story on alert, and **SkyeShield** for favoriting it. Also, thank you **meguhanu, SoleFaith, Female whovian, SkyeShield, ThePhantomismyLove, Skye, **and all the wonderful guests for your awesome reviews. And, as always, a special thanks to my great betas, **Uncommon fairy** and **Can't-Escape-My-Fandoms. **Y'all are amazing; thank you so much!

Please follow, favorite, review, or whatever y'all want. Feedback on Pan's view and his method of finding Jess is especially appreciated. **:) **


	14. Chapter 14

**Disclaimer: Unless I'm adopted, and am actually the heir of ABC, then I don't own OUAT**

* * *

Understandably, it takes me much longer to find Bae's cave again than it did to find the pixie dust tree. This is probably because Bae does not have any magic. He mentioned his father gaining power through a dagger, but I guess that power isn't hereditary.

I am easily lost by the first quarter of a mile, but I refuse to backtrack, and go to the tree, where Pan will beg me to cut him loose. If he's still tied to the tree that is. He may have already freed himself, and is probably contemplating a new way of "breaking" me.

The truth is, I almost went back. I almost helped him.

But I only knew what would happen: he would smirk, grab me, and tell me that he's closer, because he knew my weak spot.

_Not happening. _

I continue to walk, looking for any familiar places.

I don't find any, but I don't stop. I just beat Pan. He's not going to take that lightly.

Especially because a _girl_ beat him.

_Yeah, I'd like to see Wendy Darling try to beat the famous Peter Pan in a fist fight and win. _

The thought cheers me up, somewhat, but I can't get cocky. That'll just get me caught.

Finally, after what feels like several miles of walking, I stop. I'm lost more than ever, and I really need to find Bae. Wandering isn't helping, so I need something more definite. A trail of some sort.

I close my eyes, but think better of it, and open them. If I can imagine things with my eyes open, it will be much more useful in another fight. I would never be able to run out of weapons, and my attackers could get a few nasty surprises when they weren't looking.

So, I imagine, with my eyes open, a trail that can lead me to Bae. Or at least, where his cave is.

I can meet him there, if he's out.

_Except, I can't feel safe there. I can't feel secure. That'll only draw Pan to me, and that's the last thing I need. _

Still though, I imagine a trail of dim, green light, that only I can see, leading me to Bae. Fading wherever I step. But always leading me to Bae. To my surprise, it works.

The trail I was imagining appears before me, and goes on into the forest. Feeling relieved, proud of myself, but still wary, I follow the trail as quickly as possible.

It leads me through some really interesting foliage. Thick trees, that look like redwood. Overhanging moss, which add a sense of intrigue and mystery to the forest. Chutes of bamboo that look like they've been made into fences.

But one thing strikes me as odd: I hear the occasional bird, and maybe a wild animal in the distance. But I never see them. I can't find a single insect, which is really strange for an island like this. It's almost as if the island has life, but it does not want to be found.

My thoughts turn as my trail leads me to Bae's cave.

Excitement runs through me, and I start to run forward.

"Bae!" I call out to my friend. "Bae, it's me!"

Immediately, the door to the cave moves up, and Bae is standing at the entrance, holding a candle in a coconut.

"Jess?" he calls out, uncertainly.

"It's me," I reply. "Don't worry, Pan isn't here. I can't sense him anywhere."

He seems confused by this, and I honestly don't blame him.

"I'll explain inside," I say. "I've just had to trek through what feels like half of Neverland to get here. Plus, there's some stuff I have to talk to you about."

Bae takes it in, nods, and lets me through the door.

His cave remains the same as ever, but I stay a little on edge.

_No feeling of security. It will only get me caught, and put Bae in danger. _

As soon as he's lowered the cave door, Bae walks over to me and hugs me.

This catches me off guard, but I hug him back. It's good to see him, and I am glad Pan didn't hurt him after he took me.

"I didn't know what Pan was going to do to you," he tells me. "I heard you scream, and I called out for you when you let go, but I when I lit the torch, you and Pan weren't here."

I nod, and we part.

"What happened?" he asks, taking in how my appearance has changed since we met.

I'm wearing different clothes, and I'm clean from my swim with the mermaids.

I sigh, and sit down, massaging my feet. I haven't walked that far since a hiking trip Dad took me on when I was twelve.

"You may want to get comfy," I warn. "It's a long story."

He takes a seat, and nods.

"I found out what Pan wants with me," I explain.

"What?" asks Bae, sitting on his heels.

"Apparently I'm a Dreamer," I explain. "I can imagine things on Neverland, and they become real. Look."

I hold out my hand and imagine a candy bar.

I think I'm getting better at it, because it appears in seconds. I look up, expecting Bae to be awed like Hook, or maybe just surprised, like I was when I imagined the first time.

Instead, his face is a mixture of surprise, and distrust.

"What's wrong?" I ask.

I hold out the candy to him, but he just stares at it as if it's a live grenade.

"Go on, take it," I urge him. "I don't really want it."

Bae shakes his head.

I pull my hand back, but not saying anything.

I wanted him to enjoy it. To have something good while we're trapped on this nightmare of an island. But instead, he just looks at me like I've grown a tail.

"I'm sorry," he says. "But I don't trust magic. It's what destroyed my family."

"But wasn't that dark magic?" I ask, remembering his story. "Because I've been able to sense magic since I arrived on Neverland, and trust me, this isn't dark."

"Dark or good, it makes no difference," he replies bitterly. "And Neverland's magic is not good."

"How do you know?" I ask, almost defensively.

_How does he know? Okay, he hates magic. Fine. But how does he know that my new-found abilities, which have helped me a lot, are bad?_

"Wendy thought that Neverland's magic was good," Bae replies, darkly. "Then she came back, and realized that magic was going to destroy her family."

He looks me in the eye, and once again, I'm taken aback by the age in his eyes. I keep forgetting that he's not a boy. Not really. He may not have grown up, but he's at least as old as Hook underneath. It's easier to forget that with him than with Pan.

"That's why I was brought to Neverland, Jess," he continues, not losing his dark tone. "So that they wouldn't lose their family."

I hesitate, considering.

Bae never told me how he got to Neverland, or why.

"You have good reason to hate magic," I concede. "It tore apart two of your families. I don't blame you."

I sigh, hoping he won't lash out at me for what I'm about to say.

"But, Bae, I've been able to sense magic since I arrived on Neverland," I explain. "I felt the dark magic in the shadow and in Pan. I felt the good magic in the pixie dust and in Tinkerbell. And, according to Pan, I am very powerful. And my gut is telling me that this magic is going to be the key to getting us off Neverland. So, if you want, I won't use it around you. But Pan wants me because I'm powerful. He will keep trying to take me. When he does, I _will_ be using magic to defend myself."

Bae considers this, and after a minute of silence, nods.

"I don't see how magic is bad if it's used in self-defense," he agrees.

Then, he cocks his head.

"When did you meet Tinkerbell?" he asks.

I smile, and continue with my story.

But when I reach the part about Hook, Bae cuts me off.

"You met the pirate captain again?" he repeats.

I nod, again confused.

"Yeah, he took me back onto his ship," I answer. "I had to leave when the Lost Boys came for me, but I'm planning to go back when it's safe."

"Don't trust him, Jess," Bae says-no, more demands.

"What?" I ask. "Why not?"

Bae runs his hand through his hair, and looks frustrated.

"Bae, what is it?" I ask, almost afraid of his answer.

"Before my father got the dagger," he explains. "My mother disappeared when I was a child. Papa told me that she had been killed by a pirate."

He turns to me, and I see his hatred, his anger, and pain written all over his face.

"When I got taken to Neverland by the shadow," he continues. "It dropped me into the water. Hook got me out, and hid me from the Lost Boys. For a while, I trusted him. Then, I found a drawing of a woman in Hook's cabin. Jess, that woman was _my mother_."

He waits to let the message sink in.

_No, that's not possible. Hook is a good man. There is no way that he would be the pirate that killed Bae's mother. There's got to be some other explanation. _

_There _needs _to be some other explanation. Because, if Bae is right, then I will lose one of the few friends I have in Neverland. _

"What did you do?" I ask, carefully.

Bae shrugs, as if it doesn't matter. But I can tell that it does.

"I grabbed a sword and told him to face me," he replies. "But then, he disarmed me. He told me that he hadn't killed her, but papa did."

He looks up at me, with tears in his eyes.

"He said that my mother abandoned me, for him. That my father found them, and ripped her heart out. And that he was after my father for revenge. And, Jess, I told him. I told him how to kill my father, because I thought I could trust him. And then, when I tried to leave, he handed me over to the Lost Boys. The pirate betrayed me."

He says the last words with so much hatred and contempt.

Now I see why Bae hates Hook so much.

And, honestly, I don't blame him.

It's one thing to think that a member of your family is killed.

But I know what its like to have a parent betray you.

My own father abandoned me and Abby. And I hate him for it. I hate him for leaving us, when we knew we needed him.

But, even more, I hate the girl he ran off with. I never even found out her name, but I was alright with that. To me, she's just a nameless entity, someone I can hate, because she chose to fall in love with my dad, and make him run off with her, rather than let him stay with her family.

And to Bae, Hook is the same, but more so. Because he betrayed Bae to Pan.

_But, why didn't he betray me, then? _

"I'm sorry, Bae," I murmur. "I had no idea."

"I know," replies Bae, looking at the other side of the cave. "And I don't blame you. But, Jess, if you want to be safe, don't trust Hook. He is so focused on killing my father, he will do anything to stay alive. Even betray people."

I take in his words, and almost feel as betrayed as Bae does.

_But he didn't betray me. He and I arranged it._

_Then again,_ a voice in the back of my mind says, _is that true? _

Pan wanted Hook to betray me, and he did. And this way, I can come back over and over, and every time, Hook will be able to hand me over to Pan, and make it look like we've planned it all.

It's all I can do to stop myself from marching over to Hook right now and confronting him.

I need to focus on the task ahead. The task that Hook distracted me from. I need to get off Neverland.

And so does Bae. After all the shelter and help he has given me, after all he's been through, it would be wrong to just leave him.

"Bae," I say. "I know that you've been hurt. And I understand that pain."

He looks at me, and I can see past the age, past the hurt, in his eyes. And I see the same boy he appears to be.

"But, Bae," I continue. "I promise, no matter what, we will get off this island. And when that does happen, I won't be able to offer you much. But I will be able to offer you a family, if you want it. My mom, Abby, and me. When we get off, I promise, my family will look after you. I won't abandon you."

Bae suddenly sits up, and smiles. I think that is the first time I've seen him smile.

"You promise?" he asks.

I nod.

"I know it won't be much-" I start, but he cuts me off.

"Jess, I've gone for so long without a family. If you want me to be part of yours, then... I truly accept it."

With that he gives me another unexpected, but totally understandable, hug.

_I have no idea how long he has gone on, alone. If he knew the Darlings, he must be a century old, at the least. And if he's been alone all that time…_

_I've probably just handed him the holy grail. _

Suddenly, I feel it.

Just vaguely, because it is so far away. But getting closer.

Pan, or his shadow.

Probably the latter, since Pan could just zap himself into the cave.

_Guess I got too comfortable here. _"Bae," I say, standing up. "I need to get out of here."

He gives me a confused look.

"The shadow," I explain. "Pan or it always can find me when I feel safe. One of Pan's mind games on me. Point is, Pan or the shadow are on their way, and I need to leave before they find me."

I have a feeling that if they do catch me, Pan is going to want payback for the fight. I can't have Bae being in the middle of that.

_I don't want to be part of that either. _

"You have to go? Now?" asks Bae, looking crestfallen.

"Hey," I say, gently taking his upper arms, and looking in his eyes. "When I come back, it will be to find an escape. We are going to escape together, Bae. And they say Pan never fails? Well he's going to fail to stop us. Okay?"

He nods, smiling a little, looking reassured.

"I'll be back soon," I say, as I make my way to the tunnel exit. "I promise."

With that, I crawl into the tunnel, and a few minutes later, climb out into the open area.

My first thought: _get away_.

I have lost whatever sense of security I may have had in the cave, so I don't think Pan or the shadow can find me.

But, I still need to go, if either know I'm in this area.

As I start to speed walk, I can almost hear my muscles screaming in protest, at the prospect of more walking.

_Well, if I gain anything from this nightmare, at least I'll be in shape by the end of it. Honestly, I don't think anyone has walked this much since the Fellowship inLord of the Rings._

When I'm far enough away (_hopefully_), I slow down, and start to consider what Bae told me about Hook.

It all makes sense.

Pan being able to find me on Hook's ship, Hook somehow always being reluctant to hand me over, yet he always does because the situation is dire and I don't want him to be hurt.

Really, Hook has played me this entire time.

_So why does it feel wrong? Why do I not feel like I've been betrayed?_

I think of Bae, and what he said about Hook and his mother.

I should be angry at Hook for what he did. Whenever I hear about a parent who has left their kid for someone else, I always feel angry at them and their lover.

But I don't feel that way about Hook. I feel like there's another side that needs to be told.

_Why?_ part of me asks.

_Bae told you his part. He told you exactly what happened with Hook. How Hook betrayed him, took his mother away. You want Bae to be your brother, so why don't you trust his word?_

I'm not sure.

I should be ranting about why I hate and am going to kill Hook, but I don't want to.

_Maybe_, I think, _it's because if I don't, it will mean Pan was right. Pan wants to make it so I won't ever trust Hook. Just him._

_So, why would he set up a con to make Hook seem trustworthy, when that's exactly the opposite of what he wants?_

The situation is way too confusing to solve on my own.

I think, if anything, I need to talk to Hook. Because, at the moment, there is no way I could feel secure on _The Roger_. If Pan finds me, it means that Hook is really a back-stabbing coward. If not, then it means I can trust him.

_And, I can find out what exactly happened between Bae and Hook._

It's not much, but at least it's a plan.

It may end up with me getting captured, it may not, but at least I'll know whether I can trust Hook or not.

I head towards the beach.

As I walk, I think about all that has happened.

I have befriended Bae, and I want to help him get out. To be part of a family.

But, still, that doesn't change one very big issue: I'm not out of Neverland yet. I haven't escaped. I'm still very much Pan's prisoner, and everyone back home is probably worried sick. Abby, Mom, Roxanne, they will be looking for me, but they can't find me.

And all I want to do is get out of here. Go home.

_Dang it, I'm starting to cry._

Wiping my eyes, I arrive at the beach, and I can see The Roger at a distance.

Well, here's another issue: _how do I get there?_

I could get some pixie dust, sure, but I don't want to risk Pan finding me. I could ask the mermaids for a lift, but I wouldn't trust those things as far as I could throw them. And I wouldn't be able to throw them very far.

I stand on the beach, trying to figure out this new problem.

_If only I had a boat…_

I pause, then slap myself on the forehead.

_I am a total idiot._

Reaching out my hand, I imagine a rowboat.

It takes a minute or so, because I haven't imagined anything this large before, but eventually a satisfactory rowboat with oars sits on the shore in front of me.

Smiling slightly, I push it out and climb in.

It takes me a little while to figure out the oars, but before long, I'm paddling the boat towards the Roger, and possibly my inevitable capture.

_Well, what's life without risks?_

It takes me awhile to row to the ship, but at least my legs are getting a rest.

When I finally do reach the ship, there's a ladder already waiting for me.

Instinctively, I try to sense if Pan or the shadow is present. Finding neither, I climb aboard.

Hook is waiting for me on the deck, looking relieved.

_Don't be so quick to trust him,_ I remind myself. _He may turn on you like he did to Bae._

"Lass!" Hook exclaims, as if he was holding his breath and did not know it.

Without warning, he encompasses me in a relieved hug.

Tonight must be my night for unexpected hugs.

"Oh, thank the gods!" he mutters. "I thought they truly had you."

While I'm tempted to return the hug, I don't. I need to be careful with Hook. If he truly is working for Pan, I cannot allow myself to get close to him.

Hook seems to realize that something is wrong, because he steps away, and looks me up and down, as if checking for injuries.

I avoid his concerned gaze, and gently pull away.

"I'm fine," I assure him, brushing his hand and hook away.

Hook meets my eyes, and catches my wary look, before I avoid his gaze again.

_Don't get close,_ I tell myself.

"Lass," Hook says in a questioning voice, "what is it?"

_How should I approach this? _

_Just tell him upfront what happened and confront him? Act cold and distant and let him guess?_

"C-Can I trust you, Hook?" I ask, cursing myself for letting my voice tremble.

He gives me a look that tells me he is taken aback by my question.

"Of course you can, lass," he replies, sounding sincere. "What makes you say otherwise?"

I cannot tell him about Bae, in case my friend is right about him. If he is, Hook could betray Bae to Pan.

"Logic," I answer, half-lying. "It makes too much sense. You being able to find me those times, each one with Pan finding me. You, always reluctant to hand me over. For all I know, you are working for Pan, and just pretending to be my friend to help capture me when-whenever I run."

I stumble at the last part, but do my best not to show how it hurts.

I look at him, and his expression is a mix between confusion, and...hurt.

I want to trust him so badly. I want to believe that he is really my friend.

_He and Bae are the only ones who I trust. Who I want to trust. And if he, one of my only friends on Neverland is a traitor…_

_I'm not sure if I'm going to be able to trust anyone again. Except, perhaps, Bae._

"There's more to this, isn't there, lass?" he asks.

He's perceptive.

_Yes, there is, but I can't tell him about Bae._

"Lass, what did Pan say about me that-"

"It wasn't Pan," I interject, immediately cursing myself for speaking.

_It's true though. I would not believe what Bae has told me if it had come from Pan. _

_But now, he knows that I've talked to someone else on the island. _

I don't want to reveal that I've met Bae...but I just need to know.

_I have to know if he is like my father. If he convinced Bae's mother to run off with him. If he used and betrayed Bae. And if he's doing the same with me._

"Is it true?" I murmur.

I see his questioning look, and I know I have to explain.

_Forgive me, Bae. _

"Did you run away with…with a boy's mother, and betray the boy to Pan?" I ask, hoping he will think that it was another Lost Boy who told me, or someone else.

Hook's eyes grow wide as he realizes what I'm talking about. Who I'm talking about.

"You...you mean Baelfire?" he asks.

I try to figure out what he's feeling with his voice, but all I can hear is pain and sorrow.

I nod, not daring to meet his eyes.

"Did-did he tell you that, or did another Lost One?" he asks.

I don't answer immediately, but he takes my hesitation as confirmation.

"Is he alright?" he asks, almost eagerly. "Is he safe?"

His questions catch me off guard, and I only look at him, stunned.

Bae has given me the impression that Hook does not care for him. Yet, right now, it would seem the opposite.

"I don't understand," I murmur. "You care about him?"

"Ever since they took him," he replies.

His expression, his voice, his eyes….

I don't doubt of his honesty. _But, even so..._

"How did they take him?" I ask.

At this, he turns away.

_Yes, there it is. The truth_.

"He was right about you," I whisper, accusation entering my voice. "You really did betray him."

Hook sighs, and I see the guilt spread across his features.

"I didn't want to," he mutters. "I was going to keep him safe here, on the Roger. But then-"

"Then he found out about his mother," I interject, crossing my arms. "Yes, he told me about that."

Hook looks back at me, and I can see longing in his eyes. He wants to tell me his side of the story. He wants me to understand why he did what he has done.

_I may still be in danger,_ I tell myself. _He may turn on me and call over Pan. _

_But_ I _want to know myself._ I _want to understand, and I want to _trust _him. _

I'm staying to let him explain, but if I get one inkling of Pan or the shadow nearby, I'm out of here.

"Milah was a...a wonderful person," he starts. "She was full of life, of spirit, of fire."

He stops, and glances at me, a hint of a smile crossing his features.

"Kind of like you, actually," he adds.

I try to control myself, but I feel a small smile coming onto my face also.

"Anyhow," he continues. "She was married to the town coward. It had been an arranged marriage, and had happened before he left for war. No parent would shame their daughter by marrying her to a coward like that."

"Sometimes they can't do anything about it," I mutter, thinking of how my grandparents told Mom that my dad was not going to make a good husband, yet she married him anyway.

Hook shrugs, but goes on.

"The only reason she stayed with him was for Baelfire. He was the only one who she cared about. But then, we met, and she was starting to feel like a caged animal. She wanted to get out of her marriage so badly, that she couldn't stand it anymore. She begged me to take her away."

"And leave her son?!" I exclaim, feeling anger boiling within me.

It sounds like what the girl who took my dad away did. Looked for someone attractive, helped them "escape" a supposedly unhappy life, and helped them to abandon their children who needed them.

"She didn't want too!" snaps Hook.

I flinch, startled at his reply. I know I haven't known Hook very long, but he has never snapped at me like that before.

It is kind of my fault, pushing him like that, but it still hurts. Hook must also see the hurt, because he immediately apologizes. I assure him it's alright, and ask him to continue.

_If I want to trust him, I need to know the entire story. _

He sighs, but continues the story.

"She didn't want to leave Balefire," he explains. "She wanted to take him with her. But time was running out, and her husband found out that she was missing before she could return to Bae. We weren't sure what would happen if her husband found her, trying to take Bae from him."

He looks on, as if lost in memories.

"We stayed together for years," he murmurs. "One adventure after another. I had so much to show her, so much to teach her about the sea. But we always tried to find Bae, someway, somehow.

We tried sailing into port, but were prevented because of the Ogre Wars. We tried the next year, but were again blocked. The next year, Milah…"

He cuts off, and raises a hand to his mouth, repressing a sound. Like a sob. In his eyes, I see tears pooling.

"Hook?" I ask, gently touching his shoulder.

He starts, as if remembering I'm here.

He turns to me, and I see a tear escaping his eye, and running down his cheek.

"She got pregnant," he murmurs. "With our child. We agreed when we found out that we had to find Bae again. He had to know his little brother or sister. But, on the way there, we got caught up in a storm. I told her to stay below decks, but she thought she heard me screaming. She ran out to the deck. A wave came, knocked her down. She made it, but the baby…"

He doesn't need to continue.

_It was a miscarriage. The baby didn't make it. _

"Oh, Hook," I whisper, feeling my heart plunge. "I'm so sorry."

He shakes his head, acknowledging that it's alright, but I see the pain in his eyes.

"After that," he goes on, even though he doesn't have to, "Milah withdrew into herself for a while. I tried to find Bae, but she insisted that she could not face him. That she was not meant to be a mother. For about a year, she refused to leave the cabin, but just stayed, in silence.

"But, she came back to me, and insisted again that we needed to find her son again. Yet, when we went back to find him, we found out that her husband, Rumpelstiltskin, was now the Dark One. And Bae was a prisoner in his own home. We tried to find the lad, and rescue him, but there was no way to get around the Dark One's magic. Then we learned that Bae had escaped, to a realm without magic. We could not follow.

"Then, a few years later, we found a bean, that could make a portal between realms. What's more, the Dark One was looking for , he found me, and remembered me. He asked me about Milah, and I told him she was dead, to protect her. But, then he made me fight him, and she followed us. She stopped him, and gave him the bean.

And then…"

Again, he stops, and the look he gives me is one of agony.

"He ripped out her heart," I finish, remembering Bae's tale. "And crushed it in front of you."

Hook nods, and I know, in my heart, that his story is true.

"Then you came into Neverland, to find a way to kill him," I continue, connecting the pieces. "But instead, you met Bae."

_And betrayed him. He betrayed the son of the woman he loved. _

"Bae insisted that he had to leave," he says. "And I knew as soon as he reached Neverland, the Lost Ones would be on him. And on me. But I was no good at helping him or killing the Dark One, dead. So, I handed him over."

He looks me in the eyes, with such intensity that no man can act.

"I regretted it the moment I did it," he says. "But I swore to myself that I would rescue Milah's boy as soon as I found a way off this island. And, Jess, I want to do the same with you. I want to help both of you off the island, away from Pan, and the Lost Ones."

He says this, and I know that I can trust him.

He truly means what he is saying. He wants to help Bae, and he wants to help me.

_Even if Bae does not trust him, I do. And that can make all the difference here. _

_But I shouldn't have had to worry about trusting him. I shouldn't have even met him. I shouldn't be here._

"It's not about getting off the island," I murmur. "I just want to go home."

Hook gently wraps me in another hug, and this time I respond to it.

"I know, lass," he whispers, soothingly. "I know."

For a second, I let him comfort me. I treasure this shred of affection that is so rare in Neverland, even though I always seem able to find it with Hook.

For a moment, I let myself feel safe.

Big mistake.

I immediately feel the dark, twisted feeling, and I sense it coming closer.

"I have to go," I say, pulling out of his embrace.

He gives me a look of surprise.

"Pan or the shadow," I explain hastily. "I can sense them coming. I need to go before they find me and realize that I still trust you."

To my surprise, he understands immediately, and leads me back to my raft.

"Go to the west side of the island," he advises me, as I start to descend into my boat. "It may take longer, but not many Lost Ones patrol that corner. You should be able to find shelter there. Don't go east, though. They like that area for some reason."

I nod, and climb into my boat.

I look up at him one more time.

"Thank you," I say, as I row away.

"Thank me when you are safe," he orders.

I give him a mock salute, and start to row in the direction he advised.

As I go, I my sixth sense tells me that the shadow or Pan are not following me. Good, that means I'm getting away.

By the time I reach the western area, my arms are as sore as my legs. I try to tell myself that sore muscles are a good thing, but the idea of failing in a fight because of them blots out any positive thought.

_Which is a shame. I could use a happy thought or two. _

I push the boat out to sea, just so no one can use it. Maybe it will even capsize, and Pan will think I went down with it.

With a sense of déjà vu, I prepare to disappear into the jungle, find a decent hiding place, and wait out the next few days, until I feel like I can make a trip to Bae's cave or The Roger. Probably not the Pixie Dust tree, though. If Pan caught me once, he can do it again.

Until then, though, I need to start to think of someway off the island. I've dodged Pan for so long, I've been distracted from the real goal: _getting back home. _

_Which may actually have been Pan's plan, distracting me from the true goal. If it was, then it's pretty -._

"Hello?"

I freeze at the sound of the voice.

I thought Hook said this area was pretty isolated of Lost Boys.

"Hello?"

There it is again. A child's voice calling out, as if lost.

But why would a young child be in this area? Did maybe one of the younger boys escape?

"Somebody? Anybody? Hello?"

_Wait. _

I feel my blood freeze as I recognize the voice.

_No, no that's not possible. It has to be Pan, tricking me. _

But I can't sense him or the shadow nearby.

"Jess? Somebody? Is anyone here?"

_No. NO!_

I take off running towards the voice, the knife I took from Pan, drawn.

_She can't be here. There's no way she could be here!_

_If Pan took her and brought her here…_

I rush out of the cover of the jungle, and back out on the beach, where the voice is coming from.

A small figure, standing on the beach, in pale purple pajamas hears me and turns around in shock.

She sees me, recognizes me, and her eyes widen.

"Jess?" she murmurs, as if she doesn't believe what she sees.

I know exactly how she feels.

"Abby?"

* * *

**A/N**: How's _that _for a cliffhanger?

Wow. So this chapter took me forever to write. It's a lot longer than the last few, but it was certainly fun.

On Hook's story of him and Milah: I always wondered what would happen if Hook and Milah had a child. Considering how much Hook loved her, I felt like they would have at least considered children. We know they wanted Bae to join them, but I think they would have wanted kids of their own as well. Milah's baby was my interpretation of why they didn't have any.

A special thanks to **BarbieHale, ThePhantomismyLove, redcatlover22, ughstilinski, **and **ImpossibleSenseinNonsense** for putting this story on alert, and to **Violet daughter of Percabeth** and **ughstilinski **for favoriting it. Also, thank you **SkyeShield, ThePhantomismyLove, Female whovian, flagurl1j, scorpiongirl92, FurySaidtoaMouse, Dreamer-Girl96, **and **meguhanu **for your great reviews! And, of course, thanks to my super beta-readers, **Can't-Escape-My-Fandoms, **and** Uncommon fairy**. Y'all are wonderful, and you keep my computer running!

Please follow, favorite, review, or whatever y'all want! Thoughts on Bae and Hook are especially appreciated. **:)**


	15. Chapter 15

**Disclaimer: Me? Invent OUAT? Funny. **

* * *

I act on my first instinct. I drop my knife, and run to her. I have her in a hug in less than five seconds.

"Jess," she whispers, sounding in amazement, as she hugs me back. "Is it really you?"

I simply nod, and reply, "Yeah, Abby. It's me."

I set her down, and suddenly, I feel a spike of fear inside me.

"Abby, how did you get here?" I ask warily.  
_If Pan brought her here, so he could use her against me, I will kill him_ _with my own two hands. Slowly, and painfully._

"Mom told me to go to sleep," she replies. "I told her I didn't want to, but she told me I needed to rest. I was thinking of you as I was laying down and starting to fall asleep, and then I was here."

She doesn't show any of the fear that she had when she was taken by the shadow. He could have taken her while she was asleep, but I doubt that it could do that without waking her up.

"How is that possible?" I murmur to myself.

"You did it to," she points out. "When you came to rescue me, remember?"

_That's right._

I did come to Neverland in a dream, and it was if I was physically present. But that was because I was a Dreamer. Then again, Abby is my sister. She could also be a Dreamer as well.

A distant howl sets my mind back on track.

I can think about this later. Right now, I have to keep Abby safe.

"Okay," I tell her, taking my hand. "We got to get out of here, Abby. Someone told me the Lost Boys don't come here that often, but we still should hide."

I lead her into the jungle, picking up my knife as we go. I have no idea where we're going, but it seems this area is alright. At the very least, Hook was correct; there isn't a Lost Boy in sight, or to be heard.

I hear her moan and I turn around.

"What is it?" I ask.

She looks down at the ground, and at her bare feet. At least she knows to be quiet.

"Is the ground hurting your feet?" I ask, softly.

I sigh, kind of wishing she could just endure it. It would make this whole thing easier. But, I say nothing. I just imagine a pair of shoes on her feet.

She gasps when they appear.

"Jess-," she starts in an awed whisper.

"No time," I mutter, hoping she understands the seriousness of the situation. If Pan finds her, I know he will use her against me. And if she is a Dreamer, then he will want her even more. I cannot let him get his hands on her.

He already took her once, and he was perfectly fine with keeping her his prisoner if I wasn't as powerful as he needed.

The thought scares me, actually. I would have lost my sister if I hadn't been born a little bit stronger as a Dreamer. Which makes me wonder, again, what exactly Pan plans are for me, if he needed an extremely powerful Dreamer.

I continue to lead her through the foliage, even though my muscles are practically screaming for me to stop.

_I can't stop. If I do, Pan may try to take her._

I lose track of time again, and after a while I hear Abby panting.

_Oh, right. She isn't used to walking this much, and she hasn't done well with hikes before this._

"Jess," Abby whispers, after a long time of walking in silence. "Can we stop?"

I look around, listening for the sound of any Lost Boys, or any other signs of disturbance.

Nothing.

"Sure," I reply, and she sits down on a fallen log. I sit beside her.

As much as I'm afraid for her, I have to admit, I'm glad she's here. I thought I would have to go through this entire place, without seeing her again. And after so long of just focusing on getting away, so I could find her and Roxanne, and even Mom again, it feels good to know that she is actually safe in bed. Pan could still hurt her in her dream, so I have to look out for her. But in the end, she still is safe.

"How's Mom?" I ask her.

All this time, I've thought about escaping and getting back to them, but I never really considered how Mom is feeling.

_She probably threw herself further into her work,_ I think bitterly. _It's easier for her to do that than be there for those who need her. _

"I told her what happened," replies Abby, seriously. "She doesn't believe me. She told me to stop making up stories and tell her what really happened. When I told her it _was_ what happened, she called the police, and had them come look for you. I keep on telling them what happened, Jess, but nobody believes me."

_Of course they wouldn't. Who would?_

A girl getting carried off to a magical land by an evil shadow is much harder to believe than the idea that the girl ran away or got kidnapped by some pervert at the very least. They'll probably say that Abby witnessed something traumatizing, and her mind misinterpreted it, or whatever psychological junk they use these days to say "she's wrong."

"And Mom?" I ask. "Is she okay?"

Abby nods.

"She's worried, but she's alright," she says. "But I heard her tell the police that she thinks Dad may have taken you."

_Not a bad theory, except for the fact that I doubt that Dad even remembers my name, much less love me enough to kidnap me._

"Jess, how were you able to make my shoes?" asks Abby.

I smile and I look at her.

"Apparently, I'm a Dreamer," I explain. "Which means that I can think of anything here in Neverland, and it will appear."

Abby's eyes light up.

"You have magic?" she asks. "Like a fairy?"

I'm tempted to bring up Tinkerbell, but I don't. I don't want her to realize that the Tinkerbell she likes from Peter Pan is really a broken ex-fairy, with no wings and untapped potential.

"Yeah," I say. "Like a fairy."

"Cool!" she says.

I smile, but hope she doesn't get any hopeful ideas. Abby with the ability to create whatever she wants..._oh, dear._ She's as sweet as can be right now, but at times when she feels greedy, she can be a real brat.

Actually, for the longest time, she _was_ a brat. She was spoiled, and whiny, and I would always have to sleepover at Roxanne's place, because if she stayed at our house, Abby would insist on staying up late with us, and hanging out with Rox. And if we tried to get her to leave us alone, she'd rant about how we never let her do anything.

But after Dad left, I knew I couldn't let Abby deal with it alone. She was only six, for crying out loud. So, I started reading Narnia to her, and it took off from there.

"Yeah, it is kind of cool," I agree. "And useful. I don't think I've been hungry since I found out what I can do."

She giggles, and we stand up and start to walk on again.

"So, what did the police do?" I ask, idly curious.

"They were at the house all night, which was why I couldn't sleep," explains Abby.

I stop dead in my tracks.

"What?" I whisper.

_That's impossible._

"How long has it been since I was taken?" I ask her, fearing the answer.

"The clock said three when Mom sent me to bed," she replies, looking confused.

I blink, taken aback by this information.

Pan said that time stands still in Neverland, and Bae said it works differently. But I never expected it to be like this.

I know I've been here for at least three days. Maybe four. But less than _twelve_ hours?

"Jess? Are you okay?" asks Abby.

I nod, and we keep on walking.

"It just feels like it's been much longer," I reply.

_Much, much longer._

"How did you escape Pan?" she asks

Yeah, she'd want to know about that wouldn't she?

I smile and begin.

"Well, the shadow took me to the island, and dropped me on the ground. A boy named Felix tried to take me to Pan, but I knocked him out when I pretended to be going to the bathroom."

She laughs, and I smile at the memory.

As I continue the story, I realize that I may not feel secure, or safe. But I feel what Pan never intended me to feel: happy. My sister is here. I can be with her. And then, when she wakes up, I can find a way back to her.

So, I have hope. Therefore, I can be happy.

She listens as if I'm telling her a fairy tale, or reading her a book. She doesn't realize how Pan has been toying with me, mentally and emotionally. She just sees the story in which I'm the young heroine fighting an evil villain and winning. Not as the situation truly is.

But, I don't have the heart to tell her otherwise. I don't need her to worry about me even more. It's bad enough that she and Mom are worried about me because I'm gone. I don't want them to worry that I may be falling in Pan's games.

When I finally finish, we stop to rest again.

"So, Captain Hook, Tinkerbell, Wendy, they're all real?" asks Abby.

I smile and nod.

"Pretty amazing, isn't it?"

She grins back, and nods.

Then she looks up at me, this time more shyly.

"Jess," she says hesitantly, and for a moment I'm reminded of the moment when the Lost Boys asked me to read to them.

"Could we read more of _The Silver Chair_?"

I don't respond immediately. On the one hand, I may get too comfortable, and Pan could find me again, and Abby as well. But, then again, I may not see my sister for awhile. I may escape before she visits again, but I don't know if I will.

And I can't let Pan control me. Last time I checked, I control my decisions, not Pan. If he wants to come and take me, then that's his problem. I will not let my fear of him scare me off.

_Then again_, a voice in the back of my mind says, _is it that you're afraid of him, or afraid that you will have to face the younger Lost Boys again? The ones who want you to be their sister?_

"Alright," I reply.

Like I did the first time I imagined something, I imagine a copy of the book.

She curls up next to me, and I continue the story.

With a little luck, we may be able to finish the book tonight.

Or, tonight for her. For me, it could be days or hours, or just seconds before the next dawn.

_Not that that sort of time matters. My baby sister is back with me._

The only time that matters is how much I have with her until she wakes up.

* * *

Peter felt a surge of glee and grinned.

No, he couldn't get too eager. The first part of the plan had only worked. If he celebrated at the beginning, he could get cocky and lose his edge. And he couldn't have that. Not when he was the one controlling the situation. Even if Vin thought that she was.

He stood in front of the fire, surrounded by the Lost Boys who had cut him free from the Tree. The other Lost Boys were gathered around a couple of trees, watching two scale the trees.

"And you're sure?" he asked the scout, Mat. "You are absolutely sure you saw Vin and her little sister?"

Mat nodded eagerly. Really pleasing Peter was a reward itself in many of the Lost Boys' minds, but Peter always made sure that they got something else for their good work. If Mat was right, Peter was going to have to give him a new bow.

If the information is correct, Peter thought absently, it's worth it.

"They didn't see me," said Mat. "But I saw them. Her and the little girl. You told us to report back if we found her, so I came straight back."

He had a proud grin on his face as he finished. Peter nodded, and gave him a genuine smile.

"Go and enjoy yourself, Mat," he said, waving his hand towards the other boys. "Expect a surprise later."

Mat ran off, in forgetting to thank Peter in his excitement. Not that it really bothered Peter. He had bigger things to think about.

"Is the girl going to be a problem?" asked Felix, interrupting his thoughts.

"Not at all," Peter replied. "She's going to be our little helper."

He could see the confusion on the his boys' faces.

"Think," he said. "What is the one think Vin is fighting to get back too? Her sister. Well, now she has her sister. She'll have hope again. She will try even harder to get back."

"And you'll step in and separate them indefinitely," finished Felix, starting to catch on to what Peter was doing.

"It will be a blow to Vin that she will never see coming," Peter said, grinning at the thought. "And the only way to heal from it will be to _move on_. Too forget about her sister. To come to us."

The boys nodded, now fully understanding the plan.

"But how did the girl even get here?" asked Marcus.

"Simple," Pan replied. "I _let_ her in. Vin had subconciously made a barrier that kept her sister out of Neverland when she was brought here. I simply lowered it. The child's power as a Dreamer did the rest."

"How is it possible, though?" asked Rufio. "Two Dreamers in one family."

"Yes, the odds were unlikely," admitted Peter. "But not surprising. Dreamers are the descendents of fairies, remember. I suspect that a fairy from the Enchanted Forest had a bastard child who she sent into the land without magic. Over the centuries, the child's magic would be passed down, and become Dreamer's magic."

That was his theory, anyway. It would explain how Vin was able to see events in the Enchanted Forest; her blood was connected to that realm, and with her power, she could easily dream about the forest rather than Neverland. The only thing was she saw it as dreams. Dreams that she was recorded, thinking they were a story for her to write.

"The little girl is her sister. Naturally, she'd be a Dreamer as well. Vin has been helping the girl's imagination grow for a while by reading to her. Also, the girl is extremely innocent. She'd be able to reach the western shore without a problem."

That may be his only obstacle. Neverland was a motherload of magic. It was divided North, East, South, and West, like any other place, but it attracted people differently.

The Eastern area seemed to attract the most courageous, which was why the Lost Boys would set up camp there often. The Southern area attracted those boys who believed that the Lost Boys were a family.

No one was quite sure what the Northern attracted, just that none of the boys were as drawn to it as any of the other corners.

But the Western area, that attracted the innocent. Peter never went there, even when he gave up Rumple. None of the other Lost Boys did either. Only the younger boys were truly drawn to that part of the island. The ones who would most likely ally with Vin in escaping.

Peter would have to change that.

He sighed, and walked away from the camp. As expected, the other boys followed.

"So, how are we playing this?" asked Marcus. "By using the little girl as leverage?"

"Then Vin would fight us even more," Peter replied. "Don't you see? We've been trying to convince Vin that the best place for her is with us. But she refuses to see it, because she wants to be with her family. We can't use that family against her. We can only use the fact that Abby is in the land without magic, and Vin is in Neverland. The funny thing is: when they _are_ separated, Vin will have done it all herself."

The boys were silent, probably considering what he was saying.

He used the silence to think of his past. He had been doing it for a while, testing out the power of the Tree. It had done its work well. He could look back on every aspect of his life, and not feel any regret. Now, he felt nothing if he did something he hadn't wanted to do. It was great.

It could be the way to break Vin; use her regret against her.

She had, after all, abandoned the younger Lost Boys to their fears. She had left him tied to the Tree. She was bound to be full of remorse.

But, no. That would be pushing her too far. He wanted her to give him loyalty, not have her wallow in grief and guilt.

"What do you mean she's going to do it all herself?" asked Rufio. "I thought that the whole point we were trying to catch her was so _you_ could convince her to join ud."

Peter shook his head. The Tree had taught him so much besides taking his regret.

"Even when I was at my most desperate moment," he said, "she abandoned me. Even if I begged her to stay, she wouldn't join us. She may linger, but when the time was right, she'd run again. No, all Vin needs is a little push here and there. Then she will collapse on herself, and be ours."

He was already mapping it out in his head. The little girl who Vin thought to be a setback for him, was truly an advantage.

It would take time. A lot of time. But it could be done. He had time.

And in the mean time, there was something he had to do with the younger boys. He knew that if any found Vin, she'd convince them to come with her. He couldn't have that. He needed some other leverage to bring them on his side.

He could use that to occupy his time until the little girl was gone.

"But the question is if she'll give in in time," pointed out Rufio. "If she doesn't give in before the sand runs out…"

"Then we take it by force," finished Peter. "It won't be as potent, but it will work. Trust me, I have no intention of dying. If Vin won't play her part, we will make her play it."

But it would not come to that. He knew it would not.

He had plenty of time in the hourglass. Vin would not be able to hold out that long. She would crumble, and he would use the pieces as needed.

"I'm confused," insisted Marcus. "I thought it was a The Heart of the Truest Belie-."

"Honestly, pay attention," snapped Felix, rolling his eyes. "Yes, he needs The Heart of the Truest Believer, but we don't know how long it will be until he finds it. If he doesn't find the heart in time, a Dreamer's heart can be a temporary replacement."

Well, at least Peter knew which of his boys were paying attention when he told them these things. He supposed he couldn't blame Marcus. Some of his boys had thick skulls, but he was pretty sure that Marcus didn't have a skull at all.

"Won't that kill her, though?" pointed out Marcus. "Why bother with all of this if we're just going to kill her?"

"She may not have to die, in the end," Peter replied, speaking slowly so the idiot would not miss a word. "If we have The Heart of the Truest Believer within our grasp, we can use her heart to buy us time, then take the heart we truly need before she dies. If we can, she lives."

It was the truth. When it came down to it, Vin was no more than a weapon until the time came. And when the time came, she was nothing but a fail-safe. But, it would be a shame to see so much power go to waste, especially if it was in Peter's control. That was why he hoped to have the heart he really needed.

Besides, he liked playing with her. It was fun.

"For now, we wait," he ordered. "Until the time comes, we hold back."

With his final commands given, he went back to the camp, heading to the group of younger boys.

He wasn't afraid. He would get Vin's heart when the time came. Peter Pan never failed, and he would not fail with her.

* * *

Abby stirs as if something is wrong.

She sits up, and looks around.

"Hey, are you okay?" I ask, allowing the book to disappear. We finished it a while ago, and were just rereading our favorite parts.

"I...I think I hear Mom," she replies, looking around warily. "But, she can't be here, can she?"

_No, she can't. From what I can tell, Hook and his crew are the only adults in Neverland. Unless you count Tinkerbell, who is magical._

Abby shakes her head, as if trying to get something out of it.

Then, I catch it. A shimmer to her.

Slowly, she is fading. Because she is leaving Neverland, and waking up.

"I think Mom's trying to wake you up," I tell her, touching her gently. My hand slips through her, as she becomes more transparent.

She looks up at me, almost in horror.

"But I don't want to go," she insists. "I don't want to leave. I just found you, Jess!"

"I know," I tell her, trying to remain calm.

_I don't want her to go either. I just found my sister, and I'm about to lose her again? It's unfair._

"But don't worry," I say, trying to reassure her. "I'll either be here when you come back tomorrow night, or I'll be back with you by the time you're going to bed."

She smiles a little, and tries to hug me, but her arms just pass through me.

"I'm coming back, Jess," she says. "I promise."

"I know you will," I reply. "I love you, Abby."

"I love you too."

With that, she's gone.

I stand up, and stretch. I don't know how long we were here, but it certainly was long enough for me to let my guard down, and feel safe. To feel secure. And yet neither Pan nor the shadow have appeared. Perhaps that's a good thing. Maybe Pan has learned to leave me alone for a little while.

I think of Abby's promise to return. I know she'll keep her promise. It's about time I kept mine, and found a way to get off Neverland.

Without a second thought, I make a trail to find Bae's cave. I don't care if I feel safe or not now. I control my fate, not Pan. If I want to feel a little bit safe while he hunts me down, then I will do so.

Smiling to myself, I follow the trail. I see the sky, in the east, starting to glow red with a new dawn. A new day.

I have found my sister again. And I'm going to find her again.

And not even Peter Pan is going to stop me.

** END OF PART ONE**

* * *

**A/N: **Hey y'all! Me again.

This chapter had so many feels to it, I just wanted to get up and hug _my_ sisters after writing it. If you want to do the same, I suggest you do. The look of confusion is kind of amusing.

Anyway, thank you **GleekGirl13, LittleMissKaizoku, thelostglader, Regalgal1524, **and **trickst37-97** for putting this story on alert, and **GleekGirl13, Regalgal1524, **and **thelostglader** for favoriting it. Also, a special thanks to **Dreamer-Girl96, Regalgal1524, **and **meguhanu **for your awesome reviews. And, thank you to my great betas, **Uncommon fairy, **and **Can't-Escape-My-Fandoms. **Y'all are amazing! Y'all are wonderful!

Also, I think it is important to wish Batman a happy 75th birthday. He is the one who reminds us you don't need powers to be a superhero. Just lots of excessive training, billions of dollars, and a lot of cool toys.

Please follow, favorite, review, or whatever y'all want! My computer appreciates it! **:)**


	16. Chapter 16

**Disclaimer: I don't own-oh, forget it!**

* * *

Even though it feels like it has been months since I was taken, it has been only a little more than three weeks. At least, that's what Abby said at her last visit.

And, surprisingly, it has been alright.

Pan has left me alone, even when I feel secure, or safe. I don't know why. Probably because he's planning something. I'm wary of this, but I still embrace this time when I can feel safe without Peter Pan trying to interfere with my life.

In the time I've been here, I've made a general map of Neverland, and have discovered that the Lost Boys usually keep to the East and maybe Southern parts of the island. They rarely travel to the North or West.

So, I stay in the North and Western parts.

About every third day or so, I visit Bae or Hook, and sometimes even Tinkerbell. I was even able get Tinkerbell some Pixie Dust, but she refused to believe that it could work. I was disappointed, because I knew she still had magic somewhere within her, but she kept the dust, just in case, which is a small comfort.

But I still haven't forgotten my promise to Abby. Bae and I work together in the time I visit to find ways off the island. I think at some points, we've stretched my ability to imagine to a breaking point.

It didn't take us long to realize that the bigger or more complex something was, the more likely it was to fall apart.

Staircases that we can climb and come back down in our realm fall to pieces when we are up the third step or so. Bridges from Neverland to home shatter at our touch. Boats to carry us home are splinters before we even get in.

After several failed trials, we agree to stick to the simple things in finding a way home.

Bae suggests finding someway to make the shadow take us home, but we have no idea how to trap the thing, much less make it take us home. He and I are both working on thinking of a way, but so far, nothing.

My days alone are also alright, even if a little lonely.

I spend my time, when I'm not brainstorming how to escape, finding a decent place to camp. The areas I stay in are actually quite beautiful, and unlike the rest of the island, lacks the sense of danger just around the corner. It just feels safe and beautiful.

Maybe this is the area that the children visit in their sleep.

I _have_ seen a couple other children, wandering around Neverland in their dreams. Most of them are young, about Abby's age. Part of me wants to approach them, but another part of me tells me that it is best that I keep my distance.

Sometimes, at night, I'll watch over those children when they are in Neverland, just to be sure that they are not hurt, or that Pan doesn't try to take them.

If no children come, then I usually spend my time reading, or imagining a notebook, with my story written in it, so that I can pick up where I left off, and write some more. It does help to pass the time, and I feel like the story is actually progressing. Snow White has taken the potion to make her forget Charming, and now she's full of hate. Maybe, by the time I get out of here, I'll be done.

But, still, every night I put everything down, and go to the Western shore to look for Abby. She appears maybe every three or four days, sometimes even two days, but at least she comes. When she does, we spend whatever time we can together.

Sometimes we read, sometimes I show her a particularly nice spot I've found, sometimes I even take her to Bae's cave.

Those visits are always a treat for her.

She loves Bae, especially after I told her that Bae would stay with us after we escaped. Bae also loves her, and will tell her stories of his time with the Darlings, or when he first arrived on Neverland. But never about his first home, with his father. I think it's still too painful for him.

I still haven't told him about my trust of Hook. I'm not sure how he'll take it, and I'm not sure how to tell him.

_Yeah, Bae, I've just decided to go ahead and trust Hook, who betrayed you and ran away with your mom, even though you told me not too._

Yeah, that will go over great.

Luckily, tonight, I don't have to worry about telling him. Abby should be coming tonight or tomorrow night, and I want her to meet Hook. I don't know why. I guess that if she's going to see all Neverland while I'm here, it seems only right to show her everyone from the Peter Pan story.

I've rested all day, so I can stay awake for tonight. On these nights, I want to be fully awake to spend time with Abby.

She is really taken by the beauty of Neverland, even if she can get a little bossy at times about where to go. But, as I constantly remind her, I'm the one who knows where to go. If we let her lead, we'll probably end up caught by Pan. Or chopped to pieces by some unknown cannibal.

When I told her the last part, her face curled up and she told me I was disgusting. It was hilarious.

Feeling it's about time, I sit up, and slip on my hiking boots. It is a bit of a walk down to the beach from my camp, but there's good cover, and it's slightly higher, so I have the upper ground.

I pick up the backpack in the corner of the tent, and zip the "door" open. Keeping a grip on the zipper, I climb out, turn around, and zip the tent shut.

It is the same invisible tent that I used a while ago, and that I'm still using today.

Hoisting the backpack over my shoulders, I start to make my way down to the beach. For some reason, I feel pretty cheerful. I thought that it couldn't be possible here in Neverland, but I'm actually happy. Maybe at the prospect of Abby meeting Hook, or maybe the idea of how we're going to get to _The Jolly Roger_. I smile at that last part.

_Yeah, I have a few surprises for her tonight. _

By the time I reach the beach, she's already at our meeting place, where we first found each other, sitting on the sand. She sees me, stands up and grins.

"What are we doing tonight?" she asks eagerly, walking over to me.

"You'll see," I reply, purposely being mysterious.

Taking her hand, I lead her into the forest. Though I can use my abilities to find the Pixie Dust tree, I make a trail of light, just to impress her.

"It's going to be a long walk," I warn her. "But that's going to be all the walking we're going to do tonight."

"Why?" she asks, trying to get me to tell her where I'm taking her.

"If I told you, it wouldn't be a surprise," I point out, as we follow the trail.

"I'll still act surprised," she offers, sounding like she's trying to be generous.

I roll my eyes, and shake my head.

"So," I say, changing the subject. "How are things at home?"

"Fine," Abby replies nonchalantly. "I think Mom called Dad today."

I almost stop, but decide it would probably be better to just talk about it as we walk.

"Why would she do that?" I ask, keeping my anger for them both out of my voice.

Abby shrugs as we walk.

"She said that she needed help around home, because you were gone," she says. "And that you were their daughter, and you needed his help more than anything right now."

I sigh, but decide not to say anything. Dad left when all three of us still needed him. I doubt that he would come because I suddenly disappeared. In fact, he and his girlfriend are probably dancing around, glad that he has one less responsibility to feel guilty about.

And Mom?

Rather than stay and help Abby get through this, she called the guy _who left us_ to take care of Abby. She couldn't even stop to think that maybe Abby needs her, and it's time _she _took responsibility, instead of tossing her daughter on someone else, as if she's a burden. Not only that, she uses _me_ to try to get Dad to come and take care of Abby.

I sigh, shaking my head.

_I can't change anything tonight. Tonight, I can't do anything but spend time with Abby. _

She starts telling me about how they're learning about Abraham Lincoln in school, and how she's wants to sign up for the school soccer team. I listen and talk about it, just occupying time until we reach the Pixie Dust Tree.

When we reach it, I tell her to wait while I climb it.

I'm still wary that Pan will show up, so I stay on alert for that twisted sense while I climb, and dream up a phial around my neck for the pixie dust. I reach a flower and fill the vial with dust. A lot more than usual, because I need enough for two for the way there and back.

I climb back down, and find her waiting, grinning.

"What is that, Jess?" she asks, pointing to the phial around my neck.

"Pixie Dust," I reply. "It makes you fly."

Her reaction is somewhat expected.

She starts squealing with excitement, and jumping up and down.

"We going to fly?!" she cries, excitement written all over her face.

I nod, and uncork the dust.

I sprinkle a pinch on both of us, and tell her to think happy thoughts.

Immediately, the dust around us glows green, and we start to float up.

I cork the phial as she opens her eyes, and they grow as big as moons.

"No way," she murmurs, a grin that could compete with the Cheshire cat appearing on her face.

I take her hand, and will that we go upwards, above the trees. We immediately fly upwards, over the trees, and through the clouds.

She laughs in amazement, and I can't help but join her, exhilaration coursing through me. I've only flown once or twice, but each time, it has been one of the most incredible things I've ever experienced.

My eyes scan the island below us, and I spot _The Roger_ in the distance.

"See that ship, way over there?" I ask, pointing.

She nods, and looks at me curiously.

"That's where we're going," I tell her.

She lets out another squeal of excitement.

_I don't know if she's figured out that we're going to see Captain Hook, or believes that we're just visiting a random ship. Either way, she's loving this. That is exactly what I was hoping for. _

"Come on," I say, willing ourselves to fly towards the ship.

I take in the feeling, the wind whipping in my hair, the entire island moving below us. It's as if, for a moment, I don't have a care in the world.

_Except, perhaps, Abby_.

I hear her laughter as we fly, and I know she feels as exhilarated as I do.

It feels like it's over too soon when we land on the deck of _The Jolly Roger. _

I turn around, and see Hook, looking at us with a mixture of surprise and amusement.

"Lass?" he calls, moving away from the helm, towards us. "What are you doing here?"

"Taking in the sights," I reply, dusting the leftover glittery dust off my arm. "Lovely nature spots here in Neverland."

Hook rolls his eyes, and I can see he's fighting back a grin.

_Yeah, he's glad to see me too. _

He comes over to me, and we give each other a hug, like we do every time I visit.

"Hey, Hook," I say, smiling.

We part, and his eyes fall on Abby, who is watching us curiously.

_Oh, right, I forgot about her for a second. Shame on me. _

"Hook, this is Abby," I say, gesturing for her to come over to us. "Abby, this is Captain Hook."

If Abby's eyes got big because we flew, her eyes may as well take up her entire face at my introduction.

"You're Captain _Hook!?_" she shrieks, looking ready to jump up and down again.

Hook looks somewhere between flattered and even more amused.

"Seems my reputation precedes me," he replies, before giving Abby a sweeping bow.

"Captain of _The Jolly Roger _at your service, my lady," he adds, before taking Abby's hand, and kissing it. I giggle at her expression, which is a combination of awe and adoration.

_Great, my sister's first crush is a pirate who is at least a hundred years old. _

Then Hook, with a smug smile, takes _my_ hand, and kisses it as well, effectively cutting off my giggles. My stunned expression is enough to get Abby laughing.

"And yours as well, my lady," he finishes.

I roll my eyes, but don't yank my hand away. Hook does his best to be a gentleman here in Neverland. That's not exactly the easiest of things. It wouldn't be nice to make it harder.

_Besides, I liked his kiss on my hand. _

"To what do I owe this great pleasure and honor?" he asks, graciously letting my hand drop. It's amazing how he does this without losing his charm for a second.

"Jess wanted to show me this ship," Abby replies, talking a mile a minute. "And so she got us pixie dust, and we flew here, and it was the most amazing thing-"

"Slow down, Abby," I tell her, laughing. "You're going to run out of air at that rate."

She stops, and blushes, but Hook shakes his head with laughter.

"It's quite alright," he assures her. "Sounds like an adventure."

"Oh, it was!" Abby continues, as if she never stopped. "Jess climbed this tree, and got the dust from the flowers there, and we flew over here, and can I climb that?"

She stops, suddenly, pointing to the rope ladder up to the Crow's Nest.

Hook lets out another laugh, and meets my eyes for permission. I nod, knowing that Abby is more than capable of climbing. Sometimes, before Dad left, he would take us rock climbing at the local gym. Abby loved it.

"Absolutely," he says, waving for her to go up.

"Great!" she says, forgetting to thank him, as she scrambles over to the ladder, and starts to climb up.

I see Smee practically biting his nails with worry as he watches Abby climb. Whether from nervousness for Abby, or about us being on the ship, I don't know. I've gotten so used to it though, his twitchy, paranoid behaviour.

Hook and I lean against the stern of the ship, watching my sister climb.

"You do realize that she's going to be infatuated with you?" I remark, casually crossing my arms over my chest.

"Oh, I'm succeeding, then?" he asks teasingly.

I playfully nudge him, and he nudges me back.

She's already half way up, and isn't even panting. We watch her progress for a minute, in silence, before Hook speaks up again.

"Why bring her here?" he asks.

I give him a questioning look, and raise an eyebrow, silently asking what he means.

"I know that you told me she came to Neverland in her dreams," he explains, still looking a little confused. "And that you were showing her the nicer parts of Neverland. But why bring her here of all places?"

I'm still confused on why he's asking me this.

"Because you're my friend," I reply, uncertain of what sort of answer he's looking for. "I already introduced her to Bae, but it didn't feel right without introducing her to the person who has pretty much looked after me since I arrived here."

I catch his expression, and unless I'm mistaken, I see tears in his eyes. I look away. I didn't mean for that to happen.

"I'm touched, lass," he murmurs.

I smile slightly, refusing to call him an idiot.

_I think anyone could see that I've bonded with Hook in ways that I hadn't expected. Has he not seen it? Or perhaps, I'm just seeing something that's not there. _

"Truth is, lass," he says. "After the baby, and Bae, I never expected to have a child in my life."

He gives me a glance, and I have a feeling that he's going to say something as equally touching.

"But, I believe that if Milah and I were ever lucky enough to have a daughter, I imagine she would be just like you."

_Alright, forget equally touching. He _wins_. _

I feel my heart fluttering, and tears pool my own eyes.

"Really?" I ask, wiping my eyes with the back of my hand, trying to be nonchalant about it.

"Yes," he replies, smiling down at me.

I choke back a small sob, and smile back at him. To know, that after Dad left, Hook thinks of me in this way is beyond touching.

_It's…overwhelmingly moving._

"Which is probably the reason I've never had a daughter," he says, ruining the tender moment.

I playfully hit him, on the arm, but can't help but feel amazed at what he has told me.

_To know that he thinks of me like this…I don't know how to describe it. It's wonderful, and flattering, and...everything just suddenly seems alright._

"Jess, look how high I am!" calls Abby, oblivious to the conversation below her.

I crane my neck up, seeing her waving down at me from the Crow's Nest.

"Great job, Abby!" I call back, waving to her down below.

"I can see the whole island from here!" she says, sounding awed. "It's beautiful."

"I know," I reply, as she looks out at the island.

Hook gives me a strange look, as I say the last part.

"What?" I ask, defensively.

"Nothing," he replies. "Just that in all my time here in Neverland, I never thought of it as beautiful."

I shrug.

"Maybe you just have to look at it differently," I say. "I think that Neverland is actually beautiful. It's just seems scary and ugly at times because of Pan and his shadow. If neither were here, I think Neverland would be beautiful to everyone."

At this, I feel as if somewhere, in the distance, something stirs at my words. Almost as if a part of the island reacting to what I said.

The feeling is gone as soon as it came.

I shake it off, before turning back to Abby, as she begins to descend. Probably nothing.

"That was amazing," she says, as I help her down.

"It is quite serene," agrees Hook, smiling fondly at her.

"So, you're really Captain Hook?" asks Abby, grinning.

"Aye," replies Hook, still smiling.

"And did Peter Pan really cut off your hand?" she asks.

"Abby, don't-" I start, not wanting Hook to take a trip down memory lane because Abby doesn't know better.

"It's alright, lass," he assures me.

He turns to Abby, still smiling, but this time it seems more forced.

"No, my hand was cut off by a man with the skin of a crocodile," he says. "But I will find him, and avenge my hand."

While I'm grateful that he doesn't ruin her childhood by telling her the truth, I can't help but notice how his bravado covers the true story.

"Were you a pirate before you came to Neverland?" asks Abby, still not realizing the truth beneath the story.

"Aye," he replies again. "But with the help of a magic bean, me crew and I sailed to this accursed island to plot our vengeance."

She grins, walks off to see the rest of the ship.

We watch her go, and I smile again, at seeing her happy.

"You're good with her," I note, glancing at him. "I'm surprised you and the Lost Boys don't get along more."

He shakes his head, and shrugs.

"It was a choice between Bae, and you, or the Lost Ones," he replies. "I still would make that decision again."

This is probably not the best time to point out that he also betrayed Bae to the Lost Boys to save his skin.

"I know," I say instead, leaning against the mast.

Abby is now squealing and jumping up and down as Mr. Smee introduces himself. He, and the rest of the crew, all seem to have taken a liking to her. I'm not surprised. Most adults do.

"I hear that you and Bae are planning to escape," Hook says after a moment of silence.

_He's just now realizing this? Wasn't this my goal before Hook and I even met?_

"Yeah," I reply, nodding. "It's tough, but we're working on it."

Hook nods, and looks away.

"What is it?" I ask, not able to read his expression.

He shrugs.

"I guess I was hoping you and Bae would linger, perhaps," he says. "Or stay with the crew."

He sighs, and glances at Abby, who is now admiring the helm in awe.

"But, I guess it's too late for that to happen," he says. "I can't deny you the chance to be with your sister. She is, after all, what keeps you going."

I smile, touched. Standing on tiptoe, I kiss him on the cheek.

"I would never consider forgetting you, and all that you've done for me," I assure him. "You have no idea how much it has helped me throughout...this."

I wave my hand at the island, letting him figure out my meaning.

"Jess, I wanna fly again," Abby says, suddenly appearing by my side. "Can we?"

I look at the phial holding the dust, and I sigh. I kind of wanted to stay and talk to Hook a little more. But then again, this time with Abby is limited. Who knows when I'll see her again? I can always come back and see Hook tomorrow.

"There's only enough for one trip back, Abby," I warn her. "If we go, that will be all for tonight."

Abby shrugs.

"We'll just come back tomorrow night," she says, firmly. "And we can bring Bae. I think he would love it."

I share a look with Hook, but neither of us say anything. I'm pretty sure Bae would eat poison toads before he used magic, muchless saw Hook again.

"We'll see," I say instead.

I turn to Hook, and give him another hug.

"Thanks for everything," I say sincerely, knowing that he understands what I mean.

"It was a pleasure, lass," he assures me, before Abby nearly tackles him in a bear hug.

"Bye, Captain Hook," she says, keeping a death grip on him when I try to pry her off.

"Okay, Abby," I say, when she still refuses to yield. "I think Hook needs to get back to work with his…pirating."

Hook raises his eyebrows and mouths "pirating?" to me. I stick out my tongue, and gently pull her off.

"It was lovely meeting you, Abby," Hook says, turning on his old charm again.

"Just one question," Abby says rapidly. "Do you have any kids?"

The question catches Hook off guard. His jaw drops, and his reply is a stream of stutters, as he figures out how to answer her.

"Good, then you're available," Abby says again, sounding satisfied.

"Abby!" I exclaim, with slight indignation and shock, while Hook's jaw drops even more, and the other pirates roar with laughter.

I turn around and apologize to Hook, while he shakes his head, looking bemused.

Deciding it's probably best to leave now, I uncork the phial, and allow the rest of the dust to cover us, and together, Abby and I fly off the Roger.

I'm about to lecture her about talking to Hook the way she did, but whatever I'm planning to say is lost when we start to fly over Neverland.

I expect that Abby wants to fly over the island a bit longer than a simple flight from the ship to land. I'm perfectly fine with that, though. I savour the feeling of flying, and I can't erase the grin that keeps coming onto my face. I love doing this. It's not just flying, it's being free.

_I really need to do this more often. _

I see Abby laughing as we fly, and decide to take advantage of our high view. I point down to a familiar lagoon, and shout over the wind, "That's where I met the mermaids for the first time."

"Can we go see it?" she asks, looking hopeful.

_I don't want to risk it. _

It is closer to the Lost Boy's camps. And I don't know if the mermaids would take kindly to Abby. They only kissed me to save me from drowning, and I'm pretty sure that was because Pan ordered them to. What would they do to Abby once they learned who she was?

"Maybe later," I say, not wanting to crush her hopes.

_Maybe I'll show her them later. From a distance. Safe, but still impressive. _

We continue to fly, as I point out some familiar spots. She doesn't get excited as she did about the mermaids, but she still listens.

I don't think she realizes just how intense it was for me. I think to her, it is only a fairytale, with her big sister as the heroine. She doesn't know that I was really in danger of drowning in the lagoon. And the only reason I'm still breathing is because Pan needs me for something. Something that I won't like.

But, I've thought it over.

He wants me to be loyal to him, and to the Lost Boys; so much, that he is trying to make it so I don't feel safe with anyone but them. He wants me to care about the boys as well, especially the younger ones. He also needs a Dreamer with a powerful heart, he mentioned, and was willing to make the deal of their loved one's freedom for their own.

So, if I'm correct, he needs me to make some sort of sacrifice for the sake of the Lost Boys. Something that will hurt to give up. Because he needed to make sure that the Dreamer would make the deal, and he wants me to care about the Lost Boys.

Every night, I'm still tormented by the crying of the Lost Boys. I've learned to tune it out, especially when Abby is here, but the guilt has yet to lessen.

I've talked to Bae about taking the younger boys with us, but I'm not sure what we would do after we got out with them. I don't think Mom's single salary could support us all, and I don't want the kids to end up in the system. That could be even worse than leaving them with Pan.

I feel myself slowly sinking downwards, and I see Abby is doing the same. The dust must be running low.

I direct us towards the beach where I found her, and together we make a careful landing. The glow arounds us fade, leaving the sparkly after-dust. It's going to take forever to get that out of my clothes and hair, but the grin on Abby's face makes it all worth it.

"Well, what did you think?" I ask. "Fun night?"

"Fun?" she repeats. "Jess, this has to be the best night ever!"

With that, she envelopes me in a tight hug. I laugh, but feel my grin get even bigger.

_The best night ever. It makes me feel that all the grief I've gone through all this time is suddenly worth it. I've just given my sister this night. She loved it. And since she loved it, so did I. _

"Now that is just _adorable_," a familiar voice drawls from the forest.

Panic surges through me, and I turn around, drawing the knife I got from the last fight with Pan. I take a defensive stance between Abby and the forest, and curse myself.

_I let my guard down. Why did I let my guard down?! _

I got too comfortable, didn't stay alert, and did not notice the dark, twisted feeling of Pan. _I am such an idiot!_

"I don't think I've seen anything that sweet since….since…" Pan's voice trails off, and I slowly step back, gently pushing Abby back also.

I feel the edge of an incoming wave touch the bottom of my shoe, but I couldn't care less at the moment. I will not, for the life of me, let Pan touch Abby ever again.

"Since twenty-two days ago, actually," Pan finishes, with a small chuckle.

Suddenly, I sense that darkness close, and I turn around to see him only an arm's length from us.

_Darn it, I hate how he teleports!_

He glances at me, before looking down at Abby. She whimpers, and holds my other hand when his eyes fall on her.

"That is how many days it's been in your world, right, Abby?" he asks her.

I hear in his voice the same emotion he had when he had her. Like he is speaking to a pet, not to a little girl. Specifically, _my_ little sister.

She takes a small step behind me, and I hold the knife between us and Pan.

"Leave her alone," I hiss, venom dripping from every word. "It's me you're trying to break, remember? She's not part of this."

Pan seems amused by this, and smirks.

Maybe it's just me, but something seems different about him. Before, he was dark, and scary, but now, he seems even more so. It's as if something that may have redeemed him, some attribute that could have made him good, is just...gone. Like it has been completely been removed. No, more as if some part of him was removed, but he never needed it in the first place.

"Ah, come on, Vin," he says, almost tauntingly. "I just want to see my little pet again. Is that so wrong?"

With a cruel smirk, he looks down at Abby again.

"Hello, Abby," he says, as she moans. "How have you been since your sister made the trade? You must like it here a lot, since you keep returning when you fall asleep…"

_He knew. Somehow he knew that Abby was coming to Neverland, ever since the beginning. _

"Stop it, Pan," I say, backing us away from him.

Pan feints a step forward, and seems amused when we step back even more. This fills me with anger. _I've tried for so long to escape this sadist and his games. I know I can resist them when he tries to play with me. _

_But I won't let him use Abby as a part of this sick, twisted plan of his. He already took her once, and I'm not sure what he did to her in that time, but judging by how she's acting now, I'd say it was very bad. _

"You already promised her freedom, remember?" I point out. "That was how it got started, wasn't it? Me for Abby's freedom?"  
Pan shrugs noncommittally.

"As you said when you first came here, Vin," he replies. "Deals can be broken."

"Besides," he continues, looking at Abby again. "You've proven yourself to be a powerful Dreamer, and so has your sister. Just imagine what I can do with two Dreamers in my grasp."

He smirks at the idea, and I don't know why I'm ramming the knife into him his chest right now. _Probably for Abby's sake. I don't think she'd want to see something like that. Also, I don't want her to see me doing it. _

"A pet and a weapon," he muses. "Yes, this is going to be very, very fun."

He sees my expression, and grins. Abby moans again, and I see a tear running down her cheek. I cannot let him hurt her. She's so innocent, so young. I will not let him take her again. But the look in his eyes...it's almost as if he is enjoying Abby's fear. Reveling in it. _It's sick._

"I'm going to have to get a leash, of course," he continues. "Take you on long walks, Abby. Maybe, if you're good, I'll even get you a collar, and food and water bowls."

"Shut. Up."  
I'm even surprised how low, how dangerous my voice is. I have come too far to see him torture my sister like this. I have let it go on for far too long as it is.

"Oh, don't worry, Vin," he says, his eyes meeting mine. I can't help but notice the darkness inside him has almost _increased _since I last saw him. "I still have plans for you. I won't need you to be a weapon all the time, of course. We'll have to find something for you to do when you're not creating something for me. Possibly furniture. Have you ever considered how you would do as a table?"

_Right, that's it!_

Snarling, I charge at him, ready to stab him, not caring if Abby sees or not. At the moment, making sure he hurts neither of us is the bigger problem.

"NOW!" he cries.

A split second later, I find myself thrown to the ground by what feels like three of the biggest Lost Boys. I get a face full of sand, and for a moment, all I can see and feel is sand. Then, I hear Abby scream my name, and I scramble to get up, forgetting all else.

Instead, I'm forced down by one of the boys, while one takes my knife. Two suddenly force me up, both holding me by my arms, pulling them in opposite directions behind me. I cry out at the sharp pain, and they both stop moving, keeping a death grip on my arms.

I'm finally able to see Abby. She has fallen on her back, and is trying to back away from Pan on her hands while still facing him. He deliberately approaches her slowly, looking smirking at her fear of him.

It's like a demon about to take an angel.

"Abby, wake up!" I shout, struggling against my holders.

One holds me back, while the other slaps me across the face. I somehow am able to ignore the pain, and watch with relief as Abby starts to become transparent.

_That's it, Abby. Get away from here. _

"You can't truly hurt her," I call to Pan, building a smirk of my own. "Not while she's here in a dream. She can always escape you, then."

Pan looks at me, and his expression is enough to make my stomach plummet.

"So what happens when she is here fully?" he asks me.

_Oh no. Oh, God, oh, God, _no_!_  
He reaches out, and touches Abby.

Without warning, she starts to become less transparent. More solid. Her look of horror and sudden scream is all the confirmation I need. He's pulling her in. Somehow, just as he can wake you up while you're in Neverland, he is dragging her from the real world to Neverland. And then, he can hurt her, and torture her all he wants. And I won't be able to stop him.

_No! _

_Dang it, I will not let this happen! I am supposedly the most powerful Dreamer in the world. I will not let him hurt my baby sister, now or ever again! I will grit my teeth, and focus, and_ I will use the powers that I have to my advantage!

Closing my eyes, I imagine a barrier. Something that blocks Pan from touching Abby, or the shadow for that matter. Something that keeps my little sister safe from the danger here, and will always keep her from the dangers in Neverland, until she is safe from Pan. Something that not even Peter Pan can get around, or anyone else.

Something that protects her from Pan, from his power, from the Lost Boys, and from _bloody Neverland itself!_

Suddenly, there is silence. A silence that is so sudden, so scary, it's almost brutal. Hesitantly, I open my eyes again. I'm still being held by the Lost Boys. I recognize a couple as Rufio and Felix. Pan is still standing in front of me.

But Abby is gone.

For a moment, relief sweeps through me. She's out of Neverland. She's escaped.

_She's safe._

Pan, however, is standing over me with a wide grin.

"I knew you were powerful, Vin," he says. "I just never knew you were _that_ powerful."

He turns to the Lost Boys holding me.

"I told you that we could use the little girl to our advantage," he says. "Vin has cast her out of Neverland forever. She won't ever return to Neverland."

He looks back down at me. I don't know why he's grinning.

_I just won, didn't I? I got her out._

"You won't see her again, Vin," he says.

_That's it. That's why he's so pleased with himself. _

_I may have saved my sister. I may have protected her, like I always do. But, I've also lost her._

For a second time, I've lost my baby sister.

"It doesn't matter," I whisper through gritted teeth. "I will get back to her."

I promised her that I would. I _have_ to get back to her.

"I'm sure you will," Pan replies, sounding like a parent who might say that their second grader is definitely going to be president when they grow up.

He looks at Rufio, and gives him a nod.

One of the boys suddenly grabs the back of my head, and pushes, forcing me to look downwards. Something sharp pierces my exposed neck, and immediately, everything goes blurry.

I look up at Pan again, but I can't tell if I'm looking at him or someone else.

"Why?" I ask, my voice slurred by whatever they've pricked me with.

He knows what I mean. _Why is he doing this? Why did he threaten Abby the way he did? Why does he need me in the first place?_

I feel someone jerk my head, as if someone is pulling on my hair. I can't tell. It's so hard to focus.

_I see a face…at least, I think it's a face. It's too blurry to tell...what?_

"Because, Vin," Pan hisses before everything goes black. "It's the game. You escape, I get you back. But, in the end, the girl took you away from the game. This is me putting you back in it."

* * *

**A/N:** Yes. I just did that!

Just as a head's up, the upcoming chapters are definitely going to be more intense than Part One. Not enough to change the rating to M, but still, more intense (in case you couldn't tell by the end of this chapter).

I want to give a special thanks to **meguhanu, Female whovian, **and **B** for your awesome reviews. Also, I want to thank my great betas, **Can't-Escape-My-Fandoms **and **Uncommon fairy**. Y'all are amazing, thank you so much!

Please follow, favorite, review, or whatever y'all want. Thoughts on Pan and his plans for Jess are especially appreciated.


	17. Chapter 17

**Disclaimer: Hm...something should go here...I forget. **

* * *

Everything comes to me in a haze.

I'm aware that I'm in some sort of enclosed room. And it's small.

Whatever they gave me must be wearing off, but at a snail's pace. A bright light shines in my eyes, and I slowly raise my hand to shield my eyes. Even this small action makes me tired. Right now, all I want to do is sleep. There doesn't seem to be anything else to do.

I curl up in a fetal position, with my back and knees both touching the walls. Closing my eyes, I try to drift off, to sleep, and let the drug wear off on its own.

Sleep doesn't come to me, so I try instead to just rest. To hear and sense what's around me, but not react. It seems to be the best thing at the moment.

After what feels like hours, I eventually become more aware of my surroundings. Still resting, I can feel my hands touching sticks, all spaced apart. It feels like the walls of my room are also made up of the same things. A small gust of wind blows, and the entire room shifts with it.

_Now, why would it do that?_

Puzzled, I try turning over, to get in a more comfortable position. Again, the room shifts.

_Wait…_

My eyes fly open, and I look through the wall I'm facing.

Except there is no wall. It is just a line of branches, spaced apart, like the rest of the room. I try to sit up, and again, the room shifts.

The ceiling, which is low enough that I can barely sit up without my head scraping against it, is also like the walls and floor of the room.

_No,_ I realize, _it's not a room at all._

_It's a cage._

Immediately, everything comes back to me like a tidal wave crashing down on me. Pan trying to take Abby, my getting her out, him drugging me.

I exhale, and immediately try to turn around, and see where I am. The cage wobbles with me. Looking around, I realize that they have not only put me in a cage, but they have also left it dangling from a tree. The cage gently swings at the slightest gust of wind, and at any sudden movement I make within it.

I touch the cords which bind the walls of the cage to the ceiling and floor. With a good knife, I can probably cut a wall free, but looking down, I doubt I could survive the fall.

My sixth sense tells me that my captor is here, but I can't pinpoint where.

"What are you playing at, Pan?" I shout, certain that he is listening. "Why am I here?"

There's no reply.

Rolling my eyes in frustration, I slowly move into a more comfortable position.

This makes no sense. He wants me to be loyal to him and the Lost Boys. He wants me to love them enough to make some sort of sacrifice. Putting me in a cage causes the exact opposite.

He was happy that Abby's gone, but he let me go on for ages, just living on my own. Why this sudden change? Why lock me in a cage?

Abby.

I exhale, trying to keep myself calm. But it seems like too much.

I've lost her, again. I know I made the decision, and that it was for her own good.

_So why does it hurt so much, knowing that I cast her out of Neverland, to protect her? I saved her from Pan. I won. Point to me. _

I should be celebrating, but I can't.

_Because I'm afraid. I'm afraid that I won't be able to escape at all. If Pan keeps me in this cage, I probably won't ever be able to escape. I can't escape when I'm trapped like this. I'm afraid that, after everything, after how far I've come, I'll fail. I'm afraid that I will never see her again. That last night was the last night I saw her._

My last moments with my baby sister may have been spent enduring Pan's verbal torture, and getting her out of Neverland.

And that thought is unbearable.

I need to get out. I need to escape. I can't let last night be my last night with my baby sister. But, I _can't_ get out.

"Let me out!" I shout. "You've made your point, now let me out!"

Silence.

"This is a bigger setback than you can believe," I warn Pan, knowing that he hears me. "It does nothing for you. It only makes me hate you even more."

Nothing.

I shout for a few more minutes, but there is never a reply. I cannot escape, and the only person who may let me out is ignoring me.

Without anything left, I start to break down into hysterical sobs. And I let it all out.

All the emotions I've held back, bundled up, or just ignored, all comes forward while I cry. For hours, I cry, rant, threaten, plead, beg, and even pray for just something. Something that can get me out of this cage.

But nothing comes. All my tears go unheard. Hours of fruitless sobs pass, and not even Pan shows his smirking face to gloat.

When I finally calm down, the sun has already set, and I'm starved. I wait for a little while, but no Lost Boy shows up with food. I guess Pan expects me to use my powers to feed myself.

Wiping my eyes, which are probably bloodshot by now, I try to calm myself again, and imagine some sort of food. But my mind's still so muddled, and my concentration so lacking, I end up with nothing.

Trying a trick I learned a while back, I imagine exhaling a murky, grey color, and inhaling a nice color. Like blue. Sky blue.

It works to calm me down, and I'm able to imagine a bowl of oatmeal. Knowing that there's no way to eat it with a spoon in a comfortable position, I just hold the bowl to my lips, and take in a mouthful, as if I'm drinking it.

Sip by sip, I finish it, and I imagine the bowl disappearing.

_Right, time to try escaping._

They took my knife, so I have to imagine a new one. I plan to cut away a wall of the cage, and imagine a mattress, or maybe a pile of cushions, to break my fall. But the knife is useless. No matter how much I hack at the cords, or cut through them, or even saw away at the wooden bars of the cage itself, the knife doesn't make so much as a nick in it. I try a knife with a serrated blade, but that does absolutely nothing but give me blisters. Pan must have some sort of magic that prevents the cage from opening.

Growling in frustration, I let the knives disappear.

Unable to find any other ideas, I just try to fall asleep. Despite my anxiety of being in the cage, it doesn't take long.

However, as soon as I drift off, I'm haunted by nightmares of Pan succeeding in taking Abby. Of him torturing and humiliating her, while I'm locked in my cage, until he needs me to make something.

I wake up crying, and with something warm and wet trickling down my legs and in my pants. I sigh, and sit up. Guess that takes care of one problem.

I try to rest, as I did earlier, but it does nothing to change how tired I am.

My cage hangs too low for me to see if there's smoke from the camp, or to see where I am on the island.

_Why am I not surprised?_

By the time dawn comes, I still haven't seen a soul, nor have heard anything else from Pan. I don't even know if he was here last night. I just know I heard his laughter, and he didn't respond.

I try shouting again, but once again, there's no reply.

It begins a cycle. I shout, but never have any reply. Sometimes, Pan's calls out something like "How do you like it, Vin? Comfy in there?"

I would almost believe it's a recording if I wasn't seeing someone out of the corner of my eye. In the trees, on the ground, somewhere in the foliage. My sixth sense tells me that Pan is here. But when I try to make eye contact, or at least get a full look, he always disappears.

Sometimes, I wonder out loud why he is doing it, but he never answers.

At night, I rest, but can never sleep. Sometimes, I'll drift off, but I'll either be haunted by nightmares, or will be woken up by a sudden gust of wind, that will rock the cage.

I don't know how long I'm in the cage. I try to imagine a watch, to keep the time, but the hour hand spins endlessly clockwise, while the minute hand spins at top speed counterclockwise. I guess Bae was right. There is no way of keeping track of time in Neverland.

Around the third day (_I think)_ I started to cry out for Bae, Hook, and Tinkerbell, but I may as well be shouting to Pan for all the answers I get.

By the end of that day, I realize how badly I smell. I'm tired, because I haven't had a real sleep since the nightmares. I'm dirty from the sweat, dried urine, dried tears, and somehow, dirt. Even up here, I still got a layer of dirt caking my skin. I'm cramped, and miserable. And alone.

_It wouldn't be so bad if I just had someone to _talk_ to_!

Right now, I would be fine enduring Pan's taunts, or even just the shadow floating by my cage, as long as I could talk to somebody.

Abby would be here, probably. She'd probably be on the beach, if I hadn't cast her out. Not that I regret it. I just miss her.

_Dang, my life is messed up._

The next day, I don't shout, because my voice has pretty much gone horse. Couldn't shout if I wanted to.

But I can cry.

I've been alone in this whole thing, and now, even my voice has abandoned me. I need to cry. I don't want to give in and cry, like I did the other night. But I just have too.

I've never been claustrophobic, but by that afternoon, when I'm done crying, I start to feel like I'm suffocating. After four, maybe five days in this cage, I can't help feeling like any second, I'm going to have a panic attack because the walls will suddenly close in around me.

_I have to get out of here,_ I think to myself, after the sun has set. _Somehow, someway, I need to get out of this cage. _

I don't have to wait too long. Only a couple of hours after realizing my newfound claustrophobia, something changes.

I feel the cage shifting, even though I've remained as still as possible over the past couple days. Whipping my head around to find the source of this disturbance, the cage starts to slowly, almost mechanically, descend. I look around, but I can't see anyone beside or below me. My fingers grasp the bars of the cage, because I'm sure any second the cage will suddenly drop, and the cage will be the only thing that keeps me from certain doom.

The cage never does drop, but simply lands softly on the ground. Immediately, several boys emerge around the cage, and start to work at the lock in front.

I can sense Pan now. He's here. Plus, I can make him out among the boys. The one lingering back, as the others do all the work.

I hear the lock open, and I'm torn between my desire to get out of the cage, and staying away from Pan, who locked me in here in the first place.

The door of the cage swings open, and I move away to the back, curling into a ball. The further away I am from Pan, the better.

He bends down at the doorway, and grins at me. I meet his grin with a glare.

"What do you want?" I ask, my voice hoarse.

"I want you to come out of your cage, Vin," he replies, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

_Yeah, so he can do what? Torture me like he would have done to Abby if I hadn't gotten her out? Or maybe he needs me to make something for him._

"Why?" I ask, after swallowing to keep my voice from hurting.

Pan shrugs.

"Well, if you don't want to come out, I suppose I can leave you here if that's what you want," he says, starting to swing the door closed.

My mouth reacts before my mind.

"No!"

He stops, and looks back in, a kind, sincere smile on his face. I _hate_ him. I hate him so much.

But I have to get out of this cage.

He holds out his hand to me, and for a moment, I hesitate. _But what other option do I have?_

I take his hand, hating that I'm shaking so much. I let him pull me out, the other Lost Boys cheering as I emerge. I see Felix and Rufio among them.

_Honestly, are those two brothers are something?_

I can see a vague resemblance, but I wouldn't be able to see it if I never noticed that they were always hanging around with the other.

Pan leads me away from the cage that he had imprisoned me, and the Lost Boys follow. It feels so good to move my legs and stretch.

"What are you doing?" I ask. "Why did you keep me in there?"

Pan smirks, as he leads me towards a clearing that I can only assume is the Lost Boy's camp.

"It was a test, Vin," he replies. "A test to prove something to me."

_Naturally, he won't tell me what that is._

"Did I pass?" I ask drily.

"We'll see," he answers. His voice is so nonchalant that I'm not sure if he's being serious or sarcastic.

I don't know what he is doing, but at this point, I feel that enduring his taunts and coming up with my own retorts are better than the cage.

We come to the clearing, where the Lost Boys are gathered. As usual, they are all scattered around, playing their strange games, or fighting.

"Jess!"

I turn at the familiar voice.

Toodles runs over, and throws his arms around my middle.

Immediately, I crouch down and hug him back. I hated my time in the cage so much, I even missed the younger Lost Boys, especially Toodles.

_Dang it, this is what he wants!_

_Was that what all of this was supposed to be? Locking me in the cage, and leaving me alone so that I even missed the Lost Boys. So much, that I may even begin to love them?_

I get a glance at Pan's smirk, and I know that this is exactly what he wanted. Anger surges through me, but I don't say anything. I don't pull out of the hug first either. Who knows how much my little friend needs a hug?

After a few seconds, however, Pan gently pulls Toodles back,

"Alright, Toodles," he says gently. "Vin has been away for a while. I'm glad to see her too. But she needs to get cleaned up."

With that, he pulls me up, and leads me to one of the many trees surrounding the clearing.

When he said that I need to get cleaned up…

He leads me down into the tree, which is hollow, of course. _Why would Pan for once have a tree that isn't hollow?_

I'm afraid of what I'll find inside it. Pan didn't let me out of the cage for nothing. Thoughts of the torture he would have inflicted on Abby enter my mind, when I stop dead in my tracks.

A bathtub. A bathtub filled with water.

I look at Pan, confused. He catches it, and shrugs.

"Well, I said you needed to wash up, and I meant it," he says, interpreting my look correctly. "You look horrible."

He would know, wouldn't he? He was the one who locked me up, and let me waste away. But, I'm puzzled by this.

He locks me in a cage for ages, knowing exactly where I am, and how I was doing in it. Then, all of sudden, out of the blue, he's nice to me? What is this?

"Don't worry," he says, turning out of the tree before I can press him. "I'll leave you be. Oh, and, Vin?"

He turns, and his smirk seems even more devious.

"Don't worry about the other boys peeking in," he says. "I posted Felix and Rufio to make sure that no one goes in without you being decent."

Meaning: _don't bother trying to escape, I've posted guards._

With a small wink, he turns and leaves the tree.

I turn to the tub, trying to figure out this enigma. Pan threatens me and Abby, drugs me, and locks me in a cage. And this is some sort of attempt to make it up to me? Or maybe he's showing how horrible he can be to me, to the point that I just want to get out, and now he's showing me how nice he can be?

Well, he has managed to confuse me at the least. I have no idea how to approach this.

Maybe, play along a little? Find out his game and turn it around on him by making it look like he's winning?

_Well_, I think to myself, _I could use a bath._

With a resolve that I've lacked since I've been in the cage, I take off my sticky, filthy clothes, and climb into the warm water. I have to admit to myself that I also really do want a bath.

Beside the tub are a set of bottles I never noticed until now. Soap, shampoo, and conditioner.

_Because that isn't weird at all?_

Warily, I start to scrub off the layers of dirt and sweat that I've gained in my prison. I massage the shampoo and conditioner into my greasy hair (separately, of course), and rinse it.

I hate to admit it, but the bath actually does feel good. But the fact that Pan made it, and it's part of his game makes it impossible to really enjoy.

After I climb out, and dry off, I find that he has left some clothes for me. _Oh, joy._

Looking at them, I see that they are more or less like a female version of the Lost Boy clothes. Even has a hood.

Rolling my eyes, I imagine my own clothes to use. The ones I was in my first night in Neverland: jeans, tank-top, denim jacket, and boots. After I change, I mentally steel myself to face Pan. I need to find out what is doing. What he's playing at. But he's only going to see it as a game. I need to be ready to play it with him.

I leave the tree, and see him playing his broken set of pipes. Yep, they're still broken. Absolutely no music. He stops when he sees me, and lowers his pipes.

Grinning, he walks over to me, not even bothered that I made my own clothes instead of wearing his.

"You're looking much better, Vin," he tells me, sounding sincere.

I feel much better, but I'm not going to give him the satisfaction by telling him this.

"Cut the crap, Pan," I snap at him. One nice gesture does make me forget what he's done to Abby and I. "What do you want?"

I half-expect him to lecture me on language like he did when on my first night here, but he instead gives me a surprised look.

"Why, Vin," he says, his voice filled with mock hurt, "I only want you to have that pleasure that all the Lost Ones have."

_What does he mean by that?_

"You never did fire that arrow," he points out.

_Oh, that's what this is about? Some stupid arrow?_

He locked me in a cage so that I could fire an arrow? _No, there's got to be more to this. Something that I'm missing._

But that's what it looks like. He calls Felix over, and has him place the apple on his head, like he did last time.

He has the arrow dipped in poison, and loaded in the crossbow. He hands it to me, smiling winningly at me.

"Go on, Vin," he says encouragingly. "Shoot."

"What are you playing at, Pan?" I ask, refusing to take the bow.

Instead of answering, Pan shrugs and withdraws the bow.

"I'm trying to be nice, Vin," he says casually. "If you don't want to shoot, maybe you should go back to your cage."

My heart drops at this.

_No. I refuse to go back to that cage. I_ can't _go through that again._

Hating myself, I snatch the bow from Pan.

"If I fire, you won't threaten me with the cage again, will you?" I ask, trying not to notice the other Lost Boys gathering around us.

Pan's eyes gleam triumphantly, as he nods.

_Oh, shoot. Now he knows my weakness. He now knows to make me do something, just lock me in my cage._

I turn to Felix, my hands trembling, as the Lost Boys, Pan, and Felix start chanting for me to shoot. Well, this is déjà vu for me.

I aim at the apple, my mind racing.

This is what Pan wants. He wants me to shoot at the apple. If I do, that means he controls me. I notice his hand at the ready, waiting for me to fire at him. No, if I do that, he will use that to his advantage. I can rule that option out.

_No, he threatened Abby. He's the reason I may never see her again until I escape. Then, he locks me in a cage, like I'm some sort of kenneled animal, and he now wants to control me by forcing me to play his game. Not happening!_

I'm my own person. I control what I do, not Pan._ I_ control my fate, not Pan. _I_ control my actions, not Pan.

And there is something I can do. Something Pan won't expect, that I can use to my advantage. Something to make him pay for what he's done for me.

In one heartbeat, I lower the bow so that it's not aimed at the apple but at Felix's heart.

Without hesitation, I let the arrow fly.

Immediately, Pan appears in front of Felix, and catches the arrow. It is only inches from his heart. Had I been even a half second faster, he would be dead.

The look on his face is a mix between shock, worry, and pride. Even he, with all his ways to try to manipulate me, did not expect me to do that.

The boys around us only look from me to Pan in a stunned silence, though anger tints on Rufio's face as well.

If I had been faster, or if he had been slower, Pan or Felix would be dead. I almost killed them. I was _going_ to kill them.

That last thought rings in my mind.

_I. Was. Going. To. Kill. Them._

Why? Not out of self-defense, or to get away. It was to prove to Pan that he didn't own me. I nearly took someone's life to prove a point.

My mind goes numb, and I look down at the bow that I used. The bow I almost used to kill.

_No, I have to get it away from me. Before I use it again. Before I try to kill again._

I drop the bow, and it takes all the self-control I have to not kick it.

What self-control? _I almost killed Felix!_

"Well done, Vin," Pan finally says, breaking the silence, tossing aside the arrow. "I don't think anyone has ever tried that."

I back away from him when he approaches.

I feel sweat sliding down my forehead, but that should be impossible. There's no way I could be sweating when it feels this cold.

"Are you alright, Vin?" he asks. "You look pale."

_I don't know _

I nearly killed, because I wanted to show Pan he didn't control me. It wasn't something I'd ever consider doing. I wouldn't even have fired the arrow if Pan hadn't threatened to put me back in the cage.

But killing to send messages? Playing along to overcome my opponent?

It's not something I would ever have done. I'm not acting like myself.

_I am acting like Pan._

* * *

**A/N: **Not as much action in this chapter, but a lot of angst.

Wow, so this chapter was very, very tough to write. Feedback on the cage, and Jess's thoughts would be very, very appreciated.

A special thanks to **BluemoonMusicGirl, Revengest, Cytryne, ToughLove726, Panneverfails9, minitiness, Mollieeeee, **and **xXFallen-Angel-Of-DarknessXx** for putting the story on alert, and **BluemoonMusicGirl, ****Cytryne, ****Panneverfails9, ****minitiness,** and **Mollieeeee **for favoriting it. Also, thank you **meguhanu, Dreamer-Girl96, minitiness, B, **and **fhjfk** for your awesome reviews! And, of course, thank you **Uncommon fairy, **and **Can't-Escape-My-Fandoms** for being my amazing betas! Thank you all so much for support, y'all are amazing!**********  
**

Please follow, favorite, review, or whatever y'all want! **:)**


	18. Chapter 18

**Disclaimer: I know something should go here, but I can't remember what...**

* * *

The revelation is almost sickening.

After all I've done to escape him, I'm acting like him. I don't want to be like him; I want to get away from him. I want to get out, but if I start to act like that, then how can I ever hope for that to happen? _Or was this even the beginning? What if I've been acting like this for a long time, and never realized?_

I shake my head, trying to clear it. I'm vaguely aware of someone leading me to the campfire, and helping me sit down. My body reacts before my mind, and I sit down and stare blankly into the flames. The other boys are now dancing around the fire, and around me, as Pan plays into his broken pipes.

_I don't know if I am acting like Pan. What if I am? If that's the case, then I need to get out._

But I can't. I'm back in Pan's camp, now. No matter how nice he pretends to be to me, he won't let me escape again. And he knows how to get to me: Abby or the cage. He just has to threaten me with either one, and I could either hurt someone to stop him, or hurt myself. Or both.

_And what if it isn't Felix next time? What if it's Hook, or Bae? Will I be able to control myself next time, or will I go through with it, and hurt someone?_

Or am I just making a mountain out of a molehill?

_Yes, I just killed, but am I acting like Pan?_

I had just come out of a cage. That was one of the worst experiences I've ever had in my life. I was scared, and angry. It's possible I just got too carried away. And if I'm ever in this situation again, I can remember this shock, and find some other way out of it.

_But, what if that's not the case? What if I am becoming like Pan: manipulative, cunning, ruthless? A killer?_

I don't know. I'm not sure anymore. I can't tell if I'm turning into a killer, or losing control, or staying sane. I don't know anymore.

_I'm lost._

As soon as I admit this to myself, something changes.

Suddenly, I can hear music. Hauntingly beautiful, hypnotizing music that sends a shiver down my spine. The music acts like an anesthetic. Immediately, everything seems vague, and unimportant. All that matters is just listening to this music. To get up, and dance to it, like the other boys are. I can't understand why I haven't joined them yet. To get lost in the music, until it ceases. Which, hopefully, will never happen.

I'm about to rise to my feet, and join the boys in the dance.

But something holds me back. I'm not sure what it is. But some thought stops me, and tells me that this isn't a good idea.

_Why?_ I think. _It can't be that bad, can it?_

_Yes it can_, a voice in the back of my mind argues. _It seems wrong. If you give into the music, you will forget everything. Escaping, running, and Abby._

That's all I need to convince me. If I give into the music, it will be all that matters. I will lose my awareness about everything else. Abby included.

_I can't forget her. So I can't give in._

But, the music is so hypnotic…

"Are you alright, Vin?"

I open my eyes to the voice, not even realizing that I had closed them.

I see Pan in front of me, a triumphant smirk on his face.

The music still continues, and now that I've opened my eyes, it's all I can do not to get up and dance to it.

_Maybe, if I talk, it will be easier._

"Wh-What was the point of all that?" I ask, my voice trembling. "Of locking me in the cage, of the bath, of having me fire the arrow?"

It's hard to even focus on finding the right words. It feels like I should let the music in. Give in to it.

_I need to stay. I need to focus. I need to hear the reason for what he has put me through._

"That night that you left me tied to the tree, Vin," he explains. "you told me that you would do anything to escape your captivity. I was testing to see if it was true."

_The liar._

I know there has to be more to it than this. He wouldn't leave me in that cage for days, and put me through that misery, and have me fire that arrow like that for a test.

"Of course," he continues, "I had to see what you would do to escape real captivity. And if you would do what you did tonight? Well, then I'll have been correct when I said you were going to be the greatest Lost One we ever recruited."

I shake my head, trying to make sense of this, ignoring his jab at me. And doing my best to ignore the music.

"But why go through all that trouble?" I ask. "You wouldn't put me through all that for just a test. You wouldn't put the life of your most faithful lieutenant on the line just to see how far I could go."

He shrugs, glancing at the boys as they dance. Even Felix and Rufio have joined. The sight would be funny if I too weren't so tempted to join them.

"You left me tied to a tree, Vin," he says casually. "Even when I begged, you still left me alone. I needed to raise the bar higher, to see what you would do if you were really desperate. And, besides, Felix's life wasn't really on the line."

He doesn't say it directly but I can read between the lines.

"This is about payback, isn't it?" I ask, feeling a little proud of myself for figuring it out. "Petty revenge for leaving you tied to that tree."

I can't help but smirk back at him, and take my own jab at him.

"Tell me, how did it feel to be beaten? By a girl, no less?" I ask, tauntingly.

His face contorts with anger, and I can see I've hit him in a pressure point. I'd be proud of myself if I didn't know that I was flirting with danger now. But, it does help distract me from the music

"Oh, that wasn't payback, Vin," he murmurs, his voice starting to become dangerous.

He raises his finger and points it at me. I focus on him, trying to push the music back.

"You left me tied to the tree, Vin," he continues. "and I begged you to release me. I promised to return you to your family, and I wasn't lying. I truly would have given you if you had freed me. But, instead, you left me. And I'm actually glad you did.

"You see, the tree feeds on your regret. And it feasted on mine. So much, that it even took away my _ability_ to regret. And now I see what a weakness it was. But it still doesn't change that you left me tied to that tree. So, no, putting you in the cage wasn't revenge. This is."

With that, he raises his pipes to his lips, and blows into them.

It's as if all resistance I've built to the music suddenly shatters. I hear the music even more, and it's even more hypnotic, and more tempting than before.

I have to get up. I have to dance, and give in.

_No! I can't._

I plant my feet firmly on the ground, and my hands grip the rock I'm sitting on. I close my eyes, trying to block out the music. But it just comes back with full force.

"Stop it," I whisper. "Just stop."

I hear Pan snort before he replies. I can almost see his smirk.

"Why, Vin?" he asks. "Don't you want to dance?"

"No," I hiss, gripping my seat even tighter. "No, I don't. Please, stop."

This is his payback. Trying to make me give in to the music. To make me submit all control to the music. But if he controls the music, then that means I'll be submitting all control to him.

"What do you want?" I ask, trying to find something, anything, to make it stop.

Pan suddenly grabs me under the chin, and I involuntarily open my eyes. The music hits me with full force, but I can't do anything to stop it.

"I want you to beg, like I did," he replies, looking completely serious. "I want you to offer me anything, like I did to you. I want you to know how it feels."

He means it. He's completely set on me begging him.

Part of me screams for me to forget it, and just give in to the music already. But if I do that, I'm giving into him.

Another part of me wants to do it. To beg for him to stop it. To offer him anything to make it stop. But how is that any different from what he's trying to prove? That to escape, I'll do anything. I'm not giving him that satisfaction.

"Rot. In. Hell," I snarl, mentally preparing myself for whatever he's going to do to me.

For a second, he and I stare at each other, refusing to break the other's gaze. His angry, cold eyes meet my stubborn ones, and I know that I've pushed him too far. He will see that I pay for not giving into him.

He releases my face, and I grip my hand holds even more firmly. I will not give him what he wants, but I have no doubt he will make me suffer for this.

I see him stand, and for a moment, I think he's going to play his pipes again. But he doesn't.

Instead, he looks out to the dancing boys.

"It seems that our Lost Girl is a little shy," he says. The other boys pause to listen.

"Shame on you boys, leaving a girl to sit alone, not offering to dance with her."

I start, realizing where he's going with this.

"Someone dance with Vin," he orders.

_No. No, he can't!_

If I start to dance, I know I won't be able to stop. I won't be able to resist. I'll give in, and be under his control.

Rufio steps forward, and offers me his hand, an evil grin on his face. He knows exactly what will happen, and he's enjoying this.

I shake my head desperately, practically clinging to my seat for dear life. The temptation to get up and dance to the music is so great. It's all I can do not to take his hand and join him.

With a careless shrug, Rufio reaches down and grabs me by the arm, forcing me to my feet.

"No!" I beg, no longer caring. "No, please!"

Pan, Felix, Rufio, and a few other boys simply grin at my desperation. Pan lifts his pipes to his lips and begins to play.

The boys start to dance again around us.

"Please," I murmur, looking Rufio in the eyes.

With a smirk, he pulls me into the dance.

I try to put up a fight as he starts to whirl me around. I try to resist to the temptation.

_Focus!_ I think. _Dang it, think of Abby! Think of Mom! Think of Roxanne! Think of anything, just focus!_

Rufio whirls me around the fire, and Pan plays the same haunting notes one more time. Just as they do this, I lose my footing for one, horrible second. And that's all the music needs.

That one second of distraction is all it takes.

Everything else fades away, and the music takes over me.

* * *

There were several things Peter enjoyed doing. But at the moment, nothing gave him more satisfaction than watching Vin dance.

She had succumbed to the music hours ago, but it was still so amusing, watching her prance around the fire with the rest of the boys, completely under his control.

If he got this much satisfaction just by having this much control over her, he couldn't wait until she was well and truly broken.

He didn't know how long it would be until that happened, but he knew it wouldn't be too long. She had taken her first real step tonight.

He truly hadn't expected what she did with the arrow. For a second, though he would never dare admit it out loud, he had been worried that he would not catch the arrow in time. That he, or Felix would be killed.

But, as he reminded himself, her firing the arrow was a good thing. It sped everything up. If she hadn't taken the shot, she would never have admitted to herself that she was lost. He had always known she was Lost, but now even she addressed it. When both players of a game agreed on something, then the better player can use it to his advantage. And not to get down on Vin, but he was the better player.

And, now that she admitted that she was lost, now that she could hear the music, she was without a doubt on her way to becoming a Lost Girl. And once any one of his group had started on that path, there was never any going back.

Still, he had time to kill before she snapped completely. And thus, he had time to make her pay for the humiliation she put him through at the Tree.

Whenever someone gave into the music, they danced for as long as he willed them. Usually, when his boys danced, he would have them stop so they wouldn't get exhausted. The intoxication of the music was so strong, that one could dance for days and days, and never notice how worn out their bodies were getting .

He didn't want his boys getting exhausted, so he would have them dance on and off, taking regular shifts to relax and rest. But he ensured that Vin was never dancing alone. There was always someone dancing beside her or with her. He didn't want the others to realize just how angry he was with her for the fight at the Tree. Especially, if the younger boys found out. He had a feeling they would turn to Vin if they saw him punishing her so blatantly.

She had started dancing on her own a while ago, but sometimes would dance with some of the others. Her face wore a somewhat dazed, somewhat pained expression, as if she had just been hit hard on the head. Like pain, drifting through numbness.

She was fighting. Inside, part of her was still trying to fight, and break free of his newfound hold on her. He wasn't about to let her go so easily. Every so often, he would pick up his pipes and play again, renewing the music's grasp on her. Sometimes he would dance around her as he did (it was very pleasing to see her pained expression turn into a completely dazed one), or he would just sit by his loyal followers and play to see their faces. They had been as angry for his humiliation at the Tree as he had been. They enjoyed seeing her dance as well.

Now, most of the other boys, well rested and rejuvenated, had joined her dance around the fire. It was so entertaining, watching how he could control so many just by playing a few simple notes.

Suddenly, someone leapt out from the foliage behind him, and before he could react, a hand pulled his head back by his hair, while another held a blade to his throat.

"Where is she?" hissed Baelfire.

Peter smirked at his grandson's feeble attempt to threaten him. It was pathetic really.

"Your love for Vin is almost touching, Baelfire," he replied. "But it's blinding you. Do you remember nothing that I taught you?"

With a simple flick of his wrist, magic sent the blade flying from Baelfire's hand, and into the middle of camp. Turning, he saw the fear in Baelfire's eyes, but also his determination. The boy was seriously intent on rescuing Vin. If he wasn't having so much fun playing with her, he might have handed her over to Baelfire, just to see how his grandson would react. But, for now, he didn't feel like sharing his toys.

"Where is she, Pan?" Balefire asked again, obviously trying not to sound afraid.

Well, he didn't have to worry about Vin at the moment. And he hadn't played with Balefire in a while. It would be kind of fun to mess with him.

"What makes you think I have her, Balefire?" Peter asked, filling his voice with mock innocence.

Balefire glared at him. He had forgotten how much Balefire hated being taunted. Peter may get a bigger kick out of this then he was expecting.

"She disappeared days ago," Baelfire replied. "She was supposed to see me two nights ago, but she never came. I've searched everywhere. I asked Tinkerbell, and I even had her ask the pirate. No one has seen her."

Well, the boy really did care about Vin if he went to Killian Jones. Baelfire hated that man almost as much as he hated Peter or his own father. Still, his hatred for the pirate captain was always something fun to rub in the boy's face.

"And what makes you think that our dear friend the pirate isn't lying?" he asked. "For all you know, he could have Vin, and isn't telling anyone."

"Because you want her," replied Balefire. "And if you want her and the pirate had her, all you would have to do is ask and he would hand her over. No, Jess is definitely here."

The boy clearly had thought this through. Maybe Peter had rubbed off on him after all. He was so proud of Balefire.

Feeling the need to give the boy a prize, and to torment him more, Pan smirked, and looked towards Vin as she danced. Baelfire followed his gaze, and his eyes widened with horror when he saw her dancing with the other Lost Ones.

Forgetting everything, Baelfire ran forward, and grabbed hold of Vin's arm.

"Jess?" he asked, trying to pull her out of the dance.

Vin immediately pulled back, and got back into the dance, as if nothing was out of the ordinary. Pan smirked at Baelfire's second fruitless attempt to stop her from dancing.

"You can't free her, Baelfire," he told his grandson, as the boy tried to drag Vin away a third time. "When your father could stop you from dancing all those years ago was because he was your blood and he was the Dark One. Trust me, Balefire, you are neither Vin's blood, nor do you have magic."

Baelfire backed away, watching her dance among the Lost Ones. For a moment, he looked like his father had when Peter had taken Baelfire.

Baelfire's face contorted with rage, and he stormed over to Peter.

"Let her go," he ordered.

Peter chuckled at the boy's concern for her.

"What, do you think I'm going to hurt her, Baelfire?" he asked. "I need her for something after all. You think I'm going to use damaged goods?"

Best not to bring up what he was doing to her at the moment, and let him think she was having fun.

"Besides, do you want me to pull her away from finally having fun? From finally fitting in with others?" he asked, knowing that the taunt would put Baelfire on edge. He had used the same argument when Baelfire first met him, and Rumple had tried to take Balefire back.

For a moment, he watched as Bae stared at Vin, leaping, spinning, and prancing around the fire, almost deer-like in her movements. He smiled to himself. Watching Baelfire's horror was almost as fun as watching Vin dance

"H-How long has she been dancing?" Baelfire asked, finally bringing up the right questions.

Pan shrugged, as if it didn't matter.

"Some time now," he replied, nonchalantly.

"And when were you going to let her stop?" asked Baelfire, no doubt remembering how Pan could make the Lost Boys dance for hours on end when he was at the camp.

"Maybe when she fainted with exhaustion," he replied, in all seriousness. "Maybe have her get up and dance a little after."

Baelfire looked ready to kill him. But the boy already knew better than to try. He had tried to kill Peter too many times to think he could succeed.

"If I were you, Baelfire," Pan said, getting tired of the game. "I'd leave this camp while you can. A lot of the boys still hold a grudge with you, for what you pulled with the indians. I'm sure many would love to see you pay when I let them stop."

Baelfire shook his head determinedly.

"I'm not leaving without her," he replied firmly.

He tried to pull Vin away again, only to be pushed aside. He landed hard by the fire. Turning his back to Peter, probably so that Peter wouldn't see his frustration. He had done that when he was first brought to Neverland.

Pan snorted at the pathetic effort Baelfire put into it.

"Maybe you should try using Felix's club on her, Baelfire," he taunted. "May have more effect."

Baelfire snorted, and turned to Peter, smiling cheerfully. Peter cocked his head, trying to understand what his grandson was grinning over. Hadn't he made it clear that there was no hope for Vin?

And if he was confident, why turn his back? Baelfire always faced his enemies.

"Nah, I think something else will," he replied.

_This was a trap._

Before Peter could react, something hard and metal smashed into the back of his head, breaking his concentration on the music. At the same time, Baelfire grabbed Vin, and yanked her away from the fire, as he threw something into the flames. No sooner had he pulled her away, the flames suddenly burst everywhere with a thick black smoke, that threw back the other boys.

The reaction was immediate.

Several of the boys were either injured, or confused and dazed from the sudden blast, and from the trance of the music broken so fast.

Vin immediately collapsed, panting with exhaustion. Baelfire was about to pull her up, when she started to vomit.

Peter tried to recover from the sudden injury, only to be hit on the back of the head again. Hard.

"I can't carry her," Baelfire was calling to whoever was behind Peter. They hit him one more time before rushing to help.

Before everything went black, Peter caught the silver gleam of a hook.

* * *

**A/N:** Yay! I've been waiting so long to release this chapter!

As y'all can see, hopefully, it's a real turning point in the fic, so I hope y'all liked it! It started out with this chapter and the last chapter written together, but it was just _way _too long, which is why this chapter is shorter than usual.

Anyways, a special thanks to **BlueSkies95, Ode to a Fangirl, fireman12468, flamegirl100, narisadar, **and **LyrisaLove** for putting this story on alert, and to **fireman12468, narisadar, **and **LyrisaLove **for favoriting _Fading Away_. Also, thank you **Dreamer-Girl96, Ode to a Fangirl, Female whovian, fireman12468, **and RandomGuest for your great reviews. And, as always, thank you to my awesome betas, **Uncommon fairy, **and **Can't-Escape-My-Fandoms**. I've been getting a lot of positive feedback for this fic, and it really means a lot to me! Thank you so much, guys!

Please follow, favorite, review, or whatever y'all want! Thoughts on the music is especially appreciated! **:) **


	19. Chapter 19

**Disclaimer: I still don't remember what goes here. My doctor says it's called selective amnesia...**

* * *

_Oh, God, what did he do to me?_

That's about all I can think of as I'm half-carried, half-dragged away from the camp. I'm not even sure who is taking me, but it's away from the camp. And if it's away from the camp, I'm good with it.

My legs feel like lead, and I feel like I'm about to faint. It's as if I just ran a marathon, without water, or practice. My body is soaked with sweat, and I can taste sick in my mouth.

I don't remember what happened after the music took over. I don't even remember dancing to it. One moment, the music took over me, as I was distracted. The next, I was on the ground, panting with exhaustion, ready to faint. Next thing I knew, I was being towed away from the camp by someone.

"Come on, lass," a familiar voice mutters. "Don't go swooning on me now."

_The person who's dragging me...I know him._

"Hook?" I mumble, as he drags me away. "What are you-"

"Not now, Jess," another voice hisses. "Wait until we're safe."

_I know that voice too. It's...Bae's voice. What is Bae doing here? With _Hook_?_

Everything seems so wrong, so confusing.

I just want to rest. _To sleep._

I start to drift on, when Hook shakes me a little.

"Not now, love," Hook tells me, as we retreat further from the camp. "Wait until we get you to _The Roger._"

"Or the cave," snaps Bae. "It's closer."

_I'm good with either as long as it's away from here._

"But she can be better protected on The Roger," argues Hook, as we move farther into the clearing.

"She's safer in the cave," Bae replies.

"How is she safer?" Hook asks angrily.

I blink at his tone. I've never heard Hook talk like that to anyone. And, even if he and Bae had a history, I wouldn't expect him to raise his voice to a kid.

"At least she's not with you!" Bae shouts.

_Alright this is getting out of hand. _

"Both of you, stop," I murmur. I want to go on, but I'm too tired.

I'll chew them out later. _After I rest. I am ready to fall asleep here and now._

I think I almost do, when Hook shakes me awake again.

"I know you're tired, lass," he mutters. "But at least stay awake until we get to some place safe."

_Tired? That's an understatement._

I vaguely hear shouts in the distance, and I know who it is. I guess the Lost Boys have recovered pretty quickly.

All three of us share a look, and I can see an agreement silently formed between Bae and Hook.

_Get her out of here first. Then we kill each other. _

I would roll my eyes at them if my eyes weren't threatening to close on me any minute.

They start to drag me further into the jungle, but not in the direction they were headed before. The area seems familiar, but I'm too tired to really know where we're going. But, if they are agreeing, they have some idea of where to go, and they're moving away from the Lost Boys, I'm fine with it.

It isn't until we reach a treehouse with a wooden ladder below that I realize where we are.

"Tink?" Hook calls, as we approach the bottom.

I see her look out from above the treehouse.

"Hook?" she calls down, sounding uncertain. "What are you doing here?"

"No time, love," Hook replies. "Short version: Pan's men are after us. Can you-"

Without a word, Tinkerbell nods, and frantically gestures that we come up.

I try to climb the ladder, as Bae and Hook make me go first. It's hard when all I want to do is just sleep.

As I start to reach the top, Tink helps guide me up, no doubt seeing that I need help. I get into the treehouse, and I see Bae enter just behind me. Hook comes last, and he and Bae start to pull up the ladder.

I just lay on the floor, wanting so badly to fall asleep.

"What's wrong with her?" Tinkerbell asks.

"Pan was able to make her dance," Bae replies. "By the time we got there, she had been dancing for hours."

_Hours? No, it couldn't have been…_

"Here, try this," says Tinkerbell, suddenly dropping next to me.

I see her raise a cup to my lips, and I instinctively drink whatever is inside. It tastes like water, but as soon as I swallow, I feel energy coursing through me.

I blink, my tiredness gone instantly. Whatever Tinkerbell gave me, it was powerful.

"Better?" asks Tinkerbell.

"Yeah," I reply, sitting up. "What was that?"

"Pixie Dust with water," she replies, standing up.

I start at that. It explains my energy burst, but she shouldn't have wasted her Pixie Dust on me.

"You…You didn't use all of it, did you?" I ask hesitantly.

Tinkerbell smiles before shaking her hand. She shows me the phial around her neck, still mostly full of Pixie Dust.

"Just a pinch," she assures me.

I nod, glad. I know she still has magic in her. Keeping the Pixie Dust tells me she believes it too, deep down.

I see Hook and Bae, both watching anxiously from the windows, and watching me.

"Are you alright, lass?" asks Hook.

I nod, standing up.

"Could you run if needed?" he asks, sounding serious.

_He thinks this could be it_, I realize. _He thinks we may be making our last stand here. _

I nod again.

"Let's get you to _The Roger_ then," he says.

"No," Bae and I say at the same time.

Hook looks at me, confused. He understands why Bae is insisting that I not go back with him, but he doesn't know why I'm not.

"Hook, Pan isn't playing anymore," I say insistently. "He...he got control over me. You've taken me away, and he's not going to like that. He's going to do everything he can to get me back."

I hate what I'm saying, but I know it's true.

_The look in Pan's eyes before he forced me to dance...locking me in the cage...he's not trying to convince me that I want to join his group anymore. He's forcing me. _

"If we go to _The Roger_, he's going to kill you, and your entire crew," I say.

_And then he'll take me. He'll lock me in the cage until God knows when, and let me rot. I can't go through that...I can't have Hook and his crew's blood on my hands. I couldn't stand almost having Felix's blood. I won't be able to stand having Hook's. _

_It would kill me. _

"The same goes for you, Bae," I murmur. "If either of you try to take me back, he's going to know."

My eyes meet Bae's, and he nods with understanding. He once was the one that Pan wanted. The one Pan hunted. He knows that he won't stop until I'm back at his camp, locked in a cage, or dancing to his pipes.

"Then we fight," Hook insists. "We take down as many Lost Boys as we can and-"

"And he'll kill us, capture Jess, and we've accomplished nothing but make him angrier," Bae says, cutting him off. "If anything, we need to get Jess to a safe place."

"I...I don't know if there's any place I can go," I admit, shaking my head.

The Western and Northern parts of Neverland are no longer safe. I don't think any place in Neverland that's safe. It's Pan's playground, he knows it like the back of his hand.

"There is one place," Tinkerbell says quietly.

I turn to her, not expecting her to be the one to speak up.

She hesitates for a moment, as if she isn't sure she should say what she's about to.

"Tink?" I ask.

I'm not sure if I want to hear her answer. On the one hand, any place away from Pan is fine with me, but if she thinks it's bad, I may not want to risk it.

"The Echo Caves," she finally says.

"No!"

I turn, startled, looking at Hook. He is glaring at Tinkerbell, and it says something that she's not cowering under his gaze.

"That place is deadly," he says forcefully. "If you think she can survive there-"

"It's only deadly if she tries to leave without revealing her secret!" Tink replies. "Which means that there is no way that Pan can take her. Even if he found someway to make her reveal her secret, he'd have to drag her out, but we know he doesn't set foot in the caves, because he'd have to tell his secret too!"

"And if she reveals her secret, then she's given Pan yet another advantage!" Hook shouts. "I lost half of me crew in that place. Do you think I'm going to just let her walk in and hide there?"

"Stop!" I shout over them.

They both stop shouting, which is a relief. But they're still glaring daggers at each other.

"What exactly are the Echo Caves?" I ask.

Both Hook and Tinkerbell open their mouths to speak, but I know that it will only break into another argument. And with the Lost Boys coming after us, we can't afford that.

"Bae, you explain," I say, pointing at my friend. If he sides with Hook, then I'll have to think of something else besides these caves.

He nods, and warily glances out the window before explaining.

"They're these caves," he starts.

"So I gathered," I mutter sarcastically.

Hook snorts, but Bae just rolls his eyes before continuing.

"They aren't normal, though," he explains. "Once you go in, you can't leave. Not until you reveal your deepest, darkest secret. The thing that you wouldn't dare tell anyone."

I blink, thinking over what he just said.

"What's the harm in that?" I ask. "They don't seem that bad to me."

"Pan hears everything that goes on in the caves, lass," says Hook, still obviously unhappy with the plan. "You reveal your secret, and Pan will know it."

_There's the catch. _

If there is one thing I don't want, it's Pan knowing my secrets. Right now, they are one of the few things I have left that he can't get too. I don't want him to know. To use them against me.

_Just as he used the cage against me to get me to shoot the arrow._

"And if you try to leave without telling your secret?" I ask quietly, already knowing the answer.

"The cave will collapse and kill you," Hook replies bitterly.

So I won't be able to leave until I'm willing to let Pan know my secrets. Meaning I won't be able to leave until I'm sure that I can escape Neverland. I don't know how long that will be. But I will have to be alone.

_It will be like being in the cage again. _

But at least I'll be able to leave when I want. In the cage, I couldn't leave until Pan let me out.

_And if I don't go to the caves, I will go straight back to the cage. I'm not doing that. _

"Take me to the caves."

Hook starts forward.

"Lass, you don't have to-"

"Yes, I do," I insist. "It's the only place Pan can't reach me."

"But-"

I shoot Hook a look.

"Hook, I'm not going back," I say forcefully. "If I have to stay there until I can really get out, then so be it."

Our eyes meet, and he sees that I'm not changing my decision.

_Please, Hook. Please understand. I can't let him get me again. I can't let him control me again. _

Finally, he sighs with resignation.

"Alright," he says. "But I'm taking you."

Bae opens his mouth to protest, but Hook holds up his hand.

"No, Baelfire," he says. "Pan saw you, but he didn't see me. They will be looking for you, but not me. I can get her to safety. You need to get to safety while you still have the chance."

"And leave her with you?" Bae retorts.

The two glare at each other, now letting their differences surface.

"Enough!" I snap.

_Pan could come and kill us all at any moment, and they choose to fight with each other?! This is ridiculous!_

"Bae," I say, turning to my friend. "Hook is right. If Pan knows you helped me, then you need to get away. Pan will be more on the look out for me than for you, but if he finds you he _will_ kill you."

I can see Bae still doesn't like it, and I bite back a sigh of frustration.

"You trusted Hook enough to help rescue me," I insist. "You just have to trust him to get me to safety.  
There is a pregnant pause, but Bae finally nods.

Hook and I put the ladder down, and Bae starts to climb.

He stops and looks at Hook.

"If you sell her to Pan," he says venomously. "I will cut off your other hand, _pirate._"

With that, he finishes his descent, and starts to run. From the window, I see him head away from the treehouse, but not in the direction of the Lost Boys either.

_Stay safe_.

For a minute, I wait for the Lost Boys to shout out something, to start turning after Bae. But they never do. All remains quiet.

"I've known Bae for years, Jess," says Tink. "He was able to evade Pan for a while, after he escaped Pan's camp. He'll be alright."

But Pan would have wanted him alive. Now, Bae is just going to be in the way of what he wants.

"Why did Pan stop searching for him?" I ask absently, trying to distract myself.

Tink shrugs.

"He just stopped one day. He never told me why."

Something about that seems wrong. I know Pan, and he wouldn't just give up. Especially if it was going after someone he wanted. Look at what he's done to get me.

I stand by the window, in silence, praying that Bae will run back, and say it's safer to stick with us. Or, at least, be safe from the Lost Boys.

_Don't die, Bae. I don't want you to die. Not for me. I already hate myself for giving into Pan. I couldn't forgive myself if he killed you because I let you do this. _

Finally, Hook clears his throat.

"Lass, if we want to get to the caves, we need to hurry."

I nod, and force myself to turn away from the window.

Part of me wants to be angry with Hook for having Bae go out there, but I can't bring myself too.

_I almost killed tonight because I was angry at Pan. Pan got control over me because I let that anger. He made me dance because _he _was angry with _me. _It was Hook and Bae's anger at each other that we were so slow getting away. _

_No more anger, no more hate. Not tonight_.

I hug Tink before going.

"Thanks, Tink," I murmur.

To my surprise, she hugs me back.

"Stay safe," she replies. "Both of you."

I never truly realized how much she cared. I considered her a friend, sort of. Pan may trust Tink enough to allow her into his camp, but in the end, I think I trust her also.

I nod, and descend from the treehouse as Hook thanks Tink for the shelter, before he follows me.

I don't hear the Lost Boys, but that only makes me more afraid for Bae.

Hook looks like he wants to say something, but he doesn't. It's a shame. I need a distraction.

_Then again, I'm practically putting myself in another cage. I'll have plenty of distractions if it's as bad as Hook makes it out to be. _

"This way, lass," Hook says quietly, leading me away from the treehouse.

I follow him in silence.

Part of me wants to talk, but the other wants to stay on edge. I don't want Pan or the shadow catching us by surprise and dragging me back.

_I can't go back. Not back to the cage. Not back to the music. Not back to...oh, God! _

I realize I say the last part out loud, and Hook gives me a small look.

It's all I need.

I feel like I've cried a lot recently, but I can't help it this time. I break down, and once again, I find myself in Hook's comforting embrace.

_I need to tell him. I don't care anymore, I need to tell someone! _

"He-He threatened Abby. I got her away, but he-he l-locked me in a c-cage, Hook," I choke out, between sobs. "He locked me in it to prove that I'd do anything to be free."

I feel Hook tense. I don't want him to get angry. He doesn't need to be going after Pan for what he did to me.

But I still need to tell him.

"H-He made me fire an-an arrow," I sob. "I did, but I shot to kill. I-I felt so shocked. So scared. So angry. A-And I felt lost. He-He was able to control me. To make me dance. Because I let him control me."

_There. I've said it. Now he knows. He knows that this helpless girl in his arms is really a monster underneath._

I hear him sigh.

_Yes, now he'll walk away. He'll abandon me. I don't blame him. _

"Lass-" he begins gently. _Gently! _

_I'm slowly turning into a horrible person, and he wants to be gentle. I don't deserve that!_

"Did you not hear me?" I shriek. "I. Tried. To. _Kill!_"

I pull away, and refuse to meet his eyes.

"I-I _wanted _to kill," I stammer. "I-I wanted them to pay. I was upset that I _didn't _kill. I-I thought i-it would be alright. I'm becoming a monster, Hook. I'm becoming Pan."

I would continue, but Hook immediately grabs me by the arm, and raises a hand to my chin, making me look into his eyes.

Instead of the anger and fear I expect to see, I only see a seriousness in his eyes.

"Lass, I'm only going to say this once," he says slowly. "You are _nothing_ like Peter Pan."

_How can he say that? After hearing what I've done? What I am?_

"No," he says, cutting me off when I open my mouth to protest. "I don't care what you did. By the sound of it, what you did is something I would have done. Except you immediately regretted it. Pan would do worse without a hint of regret."

_Especially since it isn't possible for him to regret now, _I think numbly, remembering what he told me before making me dance.

"Lass, you cannot let him believe that you are a monster," he continues. "If anything, you are the opposite. You are not Pan, nor a monster."

"Then what am I, Hook?" I ask. "One of Pan's people? A Lost Girl?"

Then, to my surprise, Hook pulls me into another hug. What surprises me even more is how good it feels. For a second, I don't feel alone. And it's wonderful.

"You," says Hook in a soothing voice. "Are a bright, beautiful, brave lass who has suffered more than any person should. And you still came out with your head held high. You have nerves of steel, and what Pan manipulated you into doing does not change who you are. Not in the least. If you were mine, I'd be proud to call you my daughter."

With that, he places a gentle kiss on my forehead.

Somehow, through some strange way, his words are able to comfort me. I think somewhere, deep down, he's right.

I tried to kill, but I was remorseful. And because of that, I won't ever try to kill again.

_I'm not a killer. I'm not a monster. I'm just a girl who wants to get home. _

But I can't do that if I wallow like I'm doing now. If I don't pick myself up, then Pan wins. Even if he never captures me, he'll have gotten to me. And I can't let him win.

Hook, sensing me calm down, clears his throat, and pulls back a little.

"Here," he says, reaching in his pocket. "I want you to have this, lass."

He pulls out a chain with a small pendant dangling from it. Looking closely, I see that the pendant is shaped like a butterfly. A beautiful butterfly made of silver, its wings encrusted with pale blue and purple stones.

"It was Milah's," he murmurs. "But, I think she would have wanted you to have it. If she was here, she'd probably insist on it."

My heart melts at what he says. I know how much he loved Milah. For him to give it up. To give this to _me_…

"Oh, Hook," I whisper. "Thank you."

He slowly places the necklace in my hand, and closes my fingers around it.

I have to blink back a tear, as I slip the necklace on. The stones sparkle in the moonlight, and I can't help but marvel at it for a moment.

"Right," says Hook, finally. "We need to keep moving."

I nod, and allow him to lead me away.

It's amazing, but Hook has done the thing I never thought possible: he has made me feel better.

He has reminded me of who I am, and has pulled me back up when I was falling. What's funny is that this isn't the first time he's done it. Somehow, Hook has always been able to do that when I feel down, or scared, or alone. He's openly admitted that he thinks of me as a daughter, and to be honest with myself, I've started to think of him as a sort of father now.

Maybe because he's been there for me when I needed someone. Because he's protected me when I needed help. He cares about me.

Come to think of it, he's more of a father to me than my dad. Dad left me and Abby, and he definitely wasn't there when I needed him. Neither him _or _Mom.

But Hook?

Hook and Bae may have their differences, but they were willing to put them aside to rescue me. At the risk of having Pan come after them.

_All because I ran out onto that one cliff._

I laugh to myself at the last thought.

"What?" asks Hook, looking behind to me.

"Nothing," I reply, shrugging. "Just...well, it's funny. If I never ran out onto that cliff, none of this would ever have happened."

Hook chuckles, nodding in agreement.

"I know what you mean, lass," he says. "Sometimes I wonder what would have happened if I hadn't gone into the one pub Milah was at. Or if we hadn't gotten our hands on that bean, I wouldn't be here in the first place."

I pause at the last part, frowning.

"What do you mean?" I ask. "What bean?"

Hook looks at me in surprise.

"I never told you?" he asks.

I shake my head, confused.

_What could a bean do to get him all the way here to Neverland?_

"Well," he says. "The Dark One wanted to get his hands on a magic bean, that can make you travel between realms. Only, Milah and I, we got it first. We offered to exchange it for letting us be. But instead…"

He pauses, and I know what he is leading up too. He always pauses when he talks about Milah's death.

"He killed her, and took my hand," he finishes. "Not knowing that the bean was in my other hand. I knew I wouldn't live long enough to find a way to kill the crocodile, so I used the bean to get to Neverland."

I blink, unable to believe my ears. I don't think Hook realizes just what he said.

"So this bean," I start, daring to hope. "It could take you to my world. Or back to yours."

"Aye," replies Hook casually.

_Oh, yeah. He has _no_ idea what he has just told me._

Hook notices my pause, and looks at me with concern.

"Lass? You alright?" he asks warily.

For the first time in a long time, a real smile creeps onto my face.

"Hook," I say, meeting his eyes. "I know how to get out of here."

* * *

**A/N: **Dunh, **Dunh, DUUUNNHHH!**

So, this chapter took me forever to write. Really. I was sitting in front of my document page for months, trying to decide how to approach this. So, I hope y'all liked it.

A special thanks to **katezivaemmajanefan** and **Terra1993 **for putting this story on alert, and to **TheRavenSlayer13 **and **Terra1993 **for favoriting it. Also, thank you, **LyrisaLove, Revengest, Female whovian, Ode to a Fangirl, TheRavenSlayer13, meguhanu, narisadar**, and the white angel for your lovely reviews. And, of course, thank you **Uncommon fairy **and **Can't-Escape-My-Fandoms**, my amazing betas! Y'all are awesome!

Okay, before we go any further, who is excited for the new season of Doctor Who? I'm on pins and needles! But, knowing my luck, I'm probably going to be trying to watch it all night, my wifi will crash, and I won't be able to watch it until tomorrow. Ah, well, I'm still keeping my fingers crossed.

Please follow, favorite, review, or whatever y'all want. Ideas on how Jess's escape plan is going to go, anyone? **:)**


	20. Chapter 20

**Disclaimer: I remember now! I don't own...I don't own...darn it!**

* * *

Three days.

That's how long I've been in the Echo Caves. How long I told Hook to wait for me. How long _I've _had to wait to leave the caves. Just long enough to get the Lost Boys tired out by looking for me and finding nothing.

It's strange. When I was alone on the island, but I was free, time seemed to pass normally. When I was in the cage, time flew by, until I couldn't even keep track of the days. Now the days seem to drag on at a snail's pace.

It's certainly no picnic, but the Caves are better than the cage. At least here, I'm not contained. I'm free to move about. I have my privacy.

I also have something to do.

In the cage, it was too cramped to do anything. Here, I practice my magic.

I'm going to be getting out of Neverland soon. I may as well see just how far my powers can go.

However, I always have to stay focused on the bean.

After Hook told me about the bean, it wasn't hard to imagine one. Unlike the things I imagined with Bae, it doesn't collapse on itself, because of its small size. But, it still has a lot of power, and I constantly have to use magic to make sure it doesn't shrivel up and die on me. I tried at first having two beans, one for me and Bae, and one for Hook.

But the amount of effort it took to keep the two alive was tiring me out. I've decided that Bae and I are going to have to use one bean to go with Hook, and he and I will have to find a bean in the Enchanted Forest. Hook was able to find one, so there must be some growing somewhere. Bae and I will find one, and use it.

It may not seem like much, but it is a plan. And I know it will work.

It _has_ to work.

I'm going home. I'm escaping this godforsaken island, and getting back home.

_Home. _

I can't suppress a small smile.

Before, I knew I had to get back, but I had no idea how. Now, I know. And I _am_ getting back home.

_Back to Abby. Back to Roxanne. Heck, I'm even looking forward to seeing Mom again. _

I stand, pacing the Caves.

The sun set about half an hour ago, and I'm waiting for the signal that Hook is leaving the ship, and heading for the island.

This is going to be a very long night. I need to be ready.

I know the Lost Boys are still going to be looking for me. I need to get out of the Echo Caves, find Bae, get us over to Hook's ship,

The problem is that as soon as I reveal my secret, Pan is going to know exactly where I am, and that I'm leaving. And that by leaving, I have some plan to escape.

I'll need to run as hard as I did on my first night here. As fast and as hard as I can, like the devil himself were after me.

In the distance, I hear the sound of a cannon. The signal Hook and I worked out to let me know he's coming. It's time to go.

Time to run one last time.

Taking a deep breath, I turn, looking back into the caves. I know Pan can hear. I may as well say it.

"I know you're listening," I say out loud. "So I'm not going to bother pretending. My deepest secret is something I think we've both known for a long time: I'm scared. I'm scared that somehow, you'll break me. Somehow, I'll become Vin. I'm scared of failing, and being separated from Abby forever. I'm scared that you'll win."

_There. I said it. I told him my biggest secret. It's the last thing Peter Pan is ever going to get from me._

Time to see if I was telling the truth.

I turn around, and walk to the edge of the cave.

I take a small step outside. Nothing happens.

Breathing a sigh of relief, I walk outside the cave.

_I'm free. Point to me._

With a grin, I break out into a run towards Bae's cave.

* * *

Peter turned, startled when he heard the cannon. It had been years-centuries-since he had heard _The Jolly Roger's_ cannon go off.

Around the camp, the Lost Boys stopped playing their games, and looked in the direction where they knew the ship to be anchored.

It had taken Peter a while to calm the boys down. They hadn't liked that Baelfire and Hook had snuck into their camp, injured their leader, and had taken Vin. He had to remind the boys that even if they went after the pirate, or Baelfire, it would not bring them closer to Vin. Vin would have realized that if they separated, they would be safer.

No doubt the pirate was telling Vin it was safe to come out of hiding now.

Which of course was a lie. Pan had the boys looking for her, but he didn't have to worry about Vin running anymore.

She had heard the music. She had given in. A part of her still fought, but she was already on her way of giving into him. No matter what the pirate, or Baelfire may try, Vin had admitted to herself that she was lost. She had taken her first step away from Hook and his grandson, and towards him.

Even if she came out of hiding, all he had to do was play his pipes, and she would come running to him.

_I know you're listening. So I'm not going to bother pretending._

Peter started. It was Vin's voice, but he had heard it in his head. How was that possible?

_Unless...no, the captain wouldn't dare hide her in the Echo Caves…_

_But then again, _he thought_, if she was desperate enough, I wouldn't put it past her to hide there._

Vin's voice came into his head again.

_My deepest secret is something I think we've both known for a long time: I'm scared. I'm scared that somehow, you'll break me. Somehow, I'll become Vin. I'm scared of failing, and being separated from Abby forever. I'm scared that you'll win._

Peter blinked.

He knew that Vin was scared and determined, but he never suspected that she was that terrified of breaking and failing. It seemed that by forcing her to send the little girl away, she had become even more determined to get back home. And now he knew. Now he could use it against her in the game.

But something about this seemed wrong. Vin was hiding in the Echo Caves, and had to tell her secret to get out. Peter knew her secret now. But she _knew_ Peter would be listening. She _knew _he would hear.

Vin never let him know how scared she was, so why reveal it now? All just to leave the caves, which were really her only sanctuary?

_Because she believes she can run away and get away, _he realized. _She's found some way to escape Neverland. And the cannon was a signal that it was time. _

Peter felt his heart plunge.

Vin had tried so many things with her magic. Was it possible that she could have found something to get her back to the Land Without Magic?

_Yes,_ he thought. _Her fear and anger towards me are fuelling her determination. It could help her find a way to escape. A way to get away from him, taking her powerful heart with her._

Peter felt that twinge of fear that he felt when Vin fired the arrow.

_No, she can't escape! I need her heart. I need her magic. I need her to_ break_! I need to control her again._

He sprang to his feet. Vin wasn't getting away. Not if he had any say in it.

"Boys!" he shouted.

Immediately, all focused their attention on him. They were already wary of the cannon; they had waited to see what their leader had to say on it.

"Our Lost Girl seems to be making an escape attempt," he said.

This caused anxious glances and mutters among the boys. Even those who didn't know Vin's true purpose thought that she was going to help save magic somehow.

"The pirate wants to take Vin with him," he continued. "He wants to take our Lost Girl-our sister-away from us. Are we going to let that happen?"

This time, the boys responded with a rousing "No!"

Peter grinned. Vin could run all she wanted, but as long as the boys wanted her to stay, she couldn't leave. Not when she truly belonged to the Lost Ones. Not when she belonged to him.

"Then go out and find her," he ordered. "She is fleeing the Echo Caves as we speak. Find her, and bring her back here! She should be carrying something that will help her leave Neverland. Take it from her and bring it to me. Extra points if you bring her back unharmed."

The effect was immediate. The boys dropped what they had been doing, grabbed their weapons, and took off. Even if those boys who weren't as concerned about Vin and Neverland would go if Peter treated it as a game.

He just hoped they would catch her before the pirate found her.

Then again, there was something he could do about that too.

"Rufio!" he called.

His loyal boy came over. He was one of the few Pan could trust to do what he had in mind. He would have given the job to Felix, but he knew the boy was eager to repay Vin for trying to kill him.

"I have a special job for you."

A grin of anticipation broke out on Rufio's face.

"Vin won't leave without the captain," he explained. "She and him have become dangerously close. Too close. And, I say that the captain has worn out his warm welcome.

I want you to find Captain Jones. And kill him."

* * *

I've run for maybe ten minutes when I hear the Lost Boys yelling in the distance. For a brief, vital moment, I pause and listen.

Yeah, they're getting closer. I guess Pan figured out that I'm running.

_Right. Time to find Bae. _

I imagine a trail leading me to Bae's cave, but invisible to the Lost Boys. Again, a glowing, green trail leads me further into the jungle. Before going, I check the bean, making sure it hasn't started to shrivel. It seems to be alright.

I take off down the trail, towards Bae.

This would be a lot better if I couldn't hear the Lost Boys getting louder. They may be going in the opposite direction of me.

_Great. I'm running towards Bae, and towards the psychos who want to kill me. Just great. _

I try to run a little faster, but it isn't long before I see torch-light in the distance. Without slowing down, I imagine a Lost Boy's cloak and hood over my shoulders and covering my face.

As I start to hear the shouts in the distance, I force myself to slow down to a convincing speed. To be safe, I duck behind a tree, making sure I'm not running straight in the middle of the group.

Remembering the first time I was running from the Lost Boys, I imagine a lantern, and force myself to walk. My heart seems to be trying to escape my chest as I walk past the torches. About twenty feet away from me, I see one of the boys with his hood down.

He barely even glances at me, too intent on looking for a girl, not a Lost Boy. Suddenly, his eyes snap back to me, and I see realization creep onto his face.

_Shoot!_

Once, I would have turned and run, but I've got better at my magic. I imagine tree roots springing from the ground, and tying him up. Especially around the mouth.

"Hey-emph!"

The boy's shout is cut off by the tree roots wrapping themselves around him, and pulling him to the ground. By the sound of it, my root gag is effective.

With a small, satisfied smirk, I continue on, still trying to look natural.

I don't get too far though, when I feel another pair of eyes on me, and hear a shout from behind me.

"That's her! The one carrying the lantern. It's her!"

Without hesitation, I start to run, throwing away my lantern. But it's too late. I can hear the Lost Boys right behind me. It takes all my willpower not to look back.

_Looking back will only slow me down. I need to keep moving. _

If there is one good thing I've gotten out of Neverland, it's that I'm better at running. And right now, it is really helping me. I may not be fast enough to escape Pan, but I can escape these guys.

Out of the corner of my eye, I see a boy, with his hood down, closing in on me. I imagine a tree root lifting in front of him, just high enough for him to trip. The next second, I see him fall flat on his face, with a small cry. I try to keep my on my path to Bae's cave, but still zigzag through the trees, trying to throw the boys off. Or, at least wear them out.

I hear one coming behind me, and without bothering to look, I imagine a tree appearing right in front of him. I'm rewarded with the sound of someone slamming themselves into a tree.

As tempting as it is, I can't look back.

_I have to keep going. I can't-_

My thoughts are cut off when comes out from under me, and pulls me up. I cry out in surprise, as I realize I've been caught in a net.

_Just like Snow White when Charming catches her in my story. _

I shake my head telling myself to snap out of it. Remembering my story won't get me out of this.

I imagine a knife, and immediately start cutting at the net.

_I have come too far to be stopped by something that is used to catch fish!_

I hear a confident chuckle that sends goosebumps down the back of my neck. I look away from cutting the neck, to the person standing below me, his hood down. Felix.

_The guy I almost killed. The one who probably wants to kill me now. _

"Hello, Vin," he says, obviously pleased that I'm trapped. I can tell Pan is rubbing off on him.

"Hello, Felix," I reply coolly, refusing to let him see that he is the last person I want to be facing.

_Except, perhaps, Pan._

I try to turn my attention back to cutting the net. I may be trapped, but if I can get out, I may be able to take Felix down. I did it when I first got to Neverland, after all. Then again, he knew Pan needed me alive. Pan may still want me, but I wouldn't put it past Felix to slit my throat and pretend that he never found me.

"That won't work," says Felix. "It has the same magic your cage had."

_Oh, wonderful. A knife won't cut it, then. _

"Then how are you supposed to get me down?" I ask, trying to keep my voice calm.

In answer, Felix swipes a knife at a rope wrapped around the tree beside me. With a small cry of shock, I fall down, and land on the ground. Hard.

With a small groan, I try to sit myself up, but Felix already is on top of me, pinning me down. I try to squirm out from under him, only for him to pinch me in the neck. Black bees dance dangerously around my eyes, and I stop struggling.

_I can't faint. Not now. _

"Like that," he says in his monotone voice, answering my question.

He still hasn't put his knife away. He still may be planning to use it.

"Over here!" he shouts, over his shoulder.

My fear lessens a small bit. He wouldn't kill me with witnesses. But, he still has me pinned down. He is still going to take me back to Pan. Back to the music. To the cage. For comfort, I try to feel the bean in my fist, reassuring myself that it is still there.

_I could use it right now. I could get away right now. But, no, I made a promise to Bae. And to Hook. I'm not leaving them behind. _

Felix sheathes his knife (thank God) and forces me to my feet.

"Don't think that I've forgotten that you tried to kill me," he says. "Pan wants you unharmed, for now. But he was very unhappy that you're trying to run. He'll want to punish you. And I'm asking if I can do the honors, Vin."

I feel another shiver run down my spine, and try my best to repress it.

_I need to get out of here._

I'm torn from my thoughts when Felix forces my arms behind my back, no doubt to tie them.

_Wait...if he does that, then he'll see...no. No!_

Before I can do anything, though, I hear Felix laugh, and his fingers enter my fist.

"No!"

I try to pull my hand away but it's too late. Felix forces the bean out of my hand. I turn and immediately try to snatch it out of his hand. Mockingly, he pulls it away. I make a grab at it again, but he still holds it out of reach.

I feel the anger I've been suppressing threaten to boil over.

_That bean is the key to getting me back home. I am not losing it to some stupid psychotic teenager who thinks of this as payback._

"Give. That. Back!" I shout, making a grab with every word.

Felix smirks, and instead puts the bean somewhere in the folds of his cloak. I'm about to jump on him and search his cloak, but I'm grabbed from behind.

Immediately, I start to struggle and kick, but my holder keeps a tight grip on me. Desperate, I start to claw at his hands, but another boy leaps forward and grabs my hands, forcing them together. I try to pull them loose, but he still loops a rope around my wrists, and is able to tie them together. He doesn't have his hood up. That's probably how they planned to find me. All wear their hoods down, because the only one who would be wearing one is the one who is pretending to be a boy.

_No. I have come too far. I'm not going back. Not to the cage. Not to Pan. Not now, when he knows my secret. _

"Felix!" I shout, allowing my desperation to take control. "Please, you have to let me go! I'm begging you! Please!"

The Lost Boy only rolls his eyes, and I feel my heart plunge.

"Vin, I'm going to make _sure_ that Pan throws you back in the cage," he replies, a gleeful menace in his eyes.

_No,_ I think, starting to panic. _I'm not going back. Not to the cage. Not just because he knows it will hurt me._

I blink at the last part. Felix knows I can't go back to the cage. He is threatening me with it because he believes it is the worst thing he can do to me. What if there was something else he thought was _worse?_

"Fine," I say, venom dripping from my voice. "Take me back to the cage. It's better than being forced to sleep with the younger ones. Being forced to hear their cries."

I see Felix's eyes light up eagerly at my words.

About ten minutes later, I'm dragged into the Lost Boys camp, which is empty. I can't sense Pan anywhere, either. I'm not sure if that's good or bad.

Before I can decide, I'm roughly thrown down into the room with the younger boys, and I hear the door lock with a click, behind me.

I see the kids sit up in their hammocks in the dim light, and motion them to be quiet. I sit up, and imagine the ropes around my wrists off of me, and on the ground. Once I'm free, I run to the door, and press my ear against it, listening for a guard.

After a few minutes, I hear nothing. I turn back around, and walk over to where Toodles is sitting, a confused look on his face. I try to give him a reassuring smile. I may have been captured, and that may have thrown me off course. But this may actually make this escape better.

"Toodles," I murmur. "How would you like to come with me?"

The confused look doesn't leave my little friend's face.

"What?" he asks.

"I can get out of here," I explain. "Out of Neverland."

I turn to look at the other boys. The other children that Pan captured, trying to find a Dreamer. Toodles. Slightly, Nibs, The Twins.

"I can get us _all_ out of Neverland," I continue. "I can get us away from Pan, and back home. I can take you boys all home with me. Come with me."

I look at all of them, hoping they will hear the pleading in my voice.

_I left these boys behind, once. And I don't care if I have to stay at home and take care of them while Mom is gone; I'm not leaving them behind again._

"If...if we go," says Toodles. "You'll be with your sister, right? With Abby?"

I nod, smiling.

"We'll _all _ be with her," I reply. "We will all be a family."

There is a pause. I wait for them to agree.

I've heard them cry. It's torn me apart every time I've had to endure their crying. I know they hate it here. They'll come with me. They _have _to come with me. Anything is better than this craphole that Pan calls 'home.'

"So, Abby will take you away from us?" asks Slightly, hesitantly.

I blink in surprise. That was not the answer I expected.

"What? No," I reply.

Why would he think that?

"If you go, Vin, Abby will only take you away from us," insists Slightly. "Just like she has this entire time."

"What?" I ask, startled. "No, that's not-"

"You've tried to leave us since you came here," mutters Nibs. "All so that you can get back to Abby."

"You tried to abandon us, so you could get back to Abby," Slightly adds, bitterly.

I look at each of their faces, hoping that they aren't saying what I think they are saying. But it's the same hard expression in every face. Even Toodles looks like the others.

"No,"I say. "That's not...Toodles, please."

I just see the small boy shrug.

"When she came on the island, you would hide and spend time with her," he points out. "But not us. If we go with you, Vin, she'll just take you away from us. Again."

"Boys," I try to insist. "It's not like that. It's…"

I suddenly stop, realizing what Toodles just said.

"Wait…"I murmur. "What did you call me?"

Toodles looks puzzled. All the boys do.

"Vin," he repeats. "That's your name, isn't it?"

It's as if my heart stops.

_No...no, please...no…_

_Anything but this. _

"Toodles," I whisper. "That's not my name."

"Yes, it is," says one of the Twins, reassuringly. "Peter explained it to us. Jess was Abby's sister. Vin is _our _sister. _You're_ Vin."

_No...no…_

I stand up, and look at all of them. I try searching for something-anything-that tells me that I'm wrong. That this isn't happening.

"Boys, please," I beg. "Please, come with me."

"You're our sister, Vin," insist Slightly, looking confused again. "_You_ need to stay. You can't let Abby take you away from us. _You_ need to stay with _us_."

_Oh, God...no…_

They don't realize how serious it is. How I can't be Vin.

I don't want to leave them. I can't leave them.

But I made a promise. And if I stay, knowing I broke that promise, I know Pan will break me.

I won't let that happen.

"I'm sorry," I whisper, tears pooling in my eyes. "But I can't."

I force myself to look away from them, and imagine a door beside me. An exit out of here.

The boys see this, and realize what it means. Their faces contort with fear.

"PETER!" shouts Slightly, at the top of his lungs. "PETER, VIN IS ESCAPING! VIN IS-"

Without thinking, I imagine vines binding themselves over all the boys, tying them to their hammocks, over their feet, over their hands, and over their mouths.

They all stare at me, their eyes laced with worry, fear, and sadness. But my eyes meet Toodles', and I see something else. Betrayal.

_He trusted me to look after him. Trusted me to protect him. To be his sister. And I betrayed him. _

"I-" I murmur, but a choking sob cuts me off.

_Oh, God…_

"I'm so sorry," I get out.

Hating myself with my entire being, I force myself to walk to the door, open it, and climb out.

_I need to get out. Get away from here. Away from Pan. Back to home. With Abby. _

The boys, if they believed what Pan convinced them to, would have stopped me.

But this does nothing to stop a tear from falling down my cheek.

* * *

**A/N: **Well, I feel like a horrible person for doing that. Poor Jess.

A special thanks to **SansaFort **and **thewritershavetheTARDIS** for putting this story on alert, and to **SansaFort, thewritershavetheTARDIS, Pan'sLostGirl, **and **heboosh** for favoriting it. Also, a special thanks to **LyrisaLove, Ode to a Fangirl, meguhanu, SansaFort, **and **Dreamer-Girl96** for leaving awesome reviews! And, of course, thank you **Uncommon fairy, **and **Can't-Escape-My-Fandoms, **my amazing betas!

Please follow, favorite, review, or whatever y'all want! Things are really heating up here, so let me know what y'all think. **:)**


	21. Chapter 21

**Disclaimer: I don't own...I don't...dang it! There goes my twenty bucks...**

* * *

As soon as I'm out of the tree, I take a deep breath, doing everything I can to recover from what just happened.

I endured their crying for so long, wanting to stop it. And, now I'm going to be the reason they are crying.

_Because I'm leaving them. The person they trusted to take care of them is abandoning them. _

_Because I have too. I have to get out of here. I can't stay. I can't go back to the cage. I can't let Pan break me._

Surprisingly, there aren't any boys hanging around the tree. No guards to catch me and throw me back with the younger ones.

_They don't expect me to come out, _ I think bitterly. _They think __I won't abandon them. _

I shouldn't leave them. They need me to look after them. I _can't_ leave them.

_But if I stay, Pan will break me. I know he will. He got a taste of controlling me, and now he won't let me go. He liked that taste too much. _

I savagely force the thoughts aside, and let my sixth sense take over. The bean is very, very powerful. If there is anything my sixth sense can pick up, it will be this bean.

I slip into the shadows around the camp as I try to sense something. I would rather not the Lost Boys that are here to find me and put me back in with the younger boys.

I don't know if I would be able to face them if I was thrown back in…

I suddenly sense something magical. Something good, strong, and beautiful.

_The bean. _

I follow what I'm sensing, feeling it getting stronger with every step. It must be close.

Cautiously sneaking around the camp, I start to feel the magic coming from a tree. There must me some sort of underground room, like with the younger boys.

_Who I'm abandoning…_

As quietly as possible, I move to the tree, and climb down the steps at the base of the trunk. I open the door, and see what looks like some sort of storeroom, smaller than the younger boys' tree room.

_That I left them tied up in, so that I could run. Oh, God…_

Trying to tell myself to focus, I start searching the shelves. I find glass phials of Pixie Dust, some sort of strange red dust labelled 'Poppies', and a thick black ink labelled "S. I."

_Squid Ink. Yeah, I think Bae might have mentioned that. How it can freeze Pan. _

Not finding the bean, I search the shelves again, but find nothing.

_No, _I think, feeling panic rise within me. _No, it has to be here. It's got to be here. I felt it._

Desperate, I start feel around the corners of the room, looking for hidden doors, or shelves.

Nothing.

I stand up, trying everything I can to hold back a scream.

_I'm an idiot. Of course it wouldn't be here. It's the key to getting me out of Neverland; they wouldn't just put it in their unguarded storerooms. I was only sensing the Pixie Dust!_

So, where is the bean then?

_With Pan, most likely. He would only trust himself to keep it from me._

How did I miss this? Screw it, how did this happen?

_You still are emotional from what happened with Toodles and the others, _a voice says in the back of my mind. _It's clouding your judgement; blinding you._

I want to cry at the thought. I don't want to leave them.

I hate myself for leaving them. Even more so, I hate Pan. He kidnaps me, threatens me and Abby, and tries to break me. But then, he brainwashes kids-innocent kids-into believing that I can't leave.

And now he has the bean that will get me out of Neverland.

_Wait…_

A desperate, half-formed plan comes into my mind. It may not work. Probably won't.

_But if it does…_

It may be my only chance.

Praying that I'm right, I grab a few phials, and rush out of the storeroom, having my sixth sense take over again. I pause before I get moving, preparing myself. This is the last thing that I want to do, but it's my only option.

I need to find Pan.

_Never thought I'd think that. _

If he wasn't holding the bean, I'd be running in the opposite direction. But I need to find him. To get the bean. To get back home. To get back to Abby.

For the first time, I'm glad when I get the dark, twisted feeling that I've learned to associate with Pan. I start to run, making sure the feeling gets stronger.

_I'm running _towards _Pan. This is so wrong._

It takes me a little to realize that I'm heading towards the Pixie Dust tree. Why would Peter be there, of all places?

Does it matter? I'm going to be getting out of here, so does it really matter?

_Not really._

"You know if you wanted to find me, you could have just asked."

I jump, and turn to look behind me. Pan is leaning on a tree, smirking.

_Seriously, is that smirk permanent? _

I want to go through with the plan. I want so badly to. But there is no way I can. Not after what he's done.

"How could you?" I ask, my voice hoarse from holding back the sobs from when I left the boys.

Pan simply smirks even more at this. He knows what I'm talking about. How he turned the younger boys against me. How he forced me to choose between them and Abby.

"How could I not, Vin?" he replies, as if it were obvious. "It was one of the few ways that I know will get to you. One of the few things that I know will make you _want _to stay. Is that so bad, Vin?"

"Don't. Call. Me. Vin!" I snap.

_I hate that name. Especially now, when it was used against me. Used by the younger boys against me. _

He cocks an eyebrow in surprise.

"Those are tears, aren't they?" he asks, pointing at my eyes.

I blink, but that's as good as confirming it. _Yes, I'm crying. Why wouldn't I?_

"You regret leaving the boys, Vin. You know you don't want to," he says. "So why leave?"

_I hate him. I hate him so much. I want to kill him here and now…_

"They'll be sad without you, you know," he says in a mockingly concerned voice. "Losing their sister. Couldn't you consider staying, Vin? For them?"

He's trying to tempt me. Trying to pull me over. I won't do it. I refuse to stay here. With him.

_But the boys need me…_

_But Abby needs me too. _

"Stop manipulating me!" I shout. "I made up my mind long ago; I'm not staying!"

"Well, why not?" asks Pan, sounding genuinely curious.

_Why not? Why not?!_

I feel everything that's happened since the shadow took me pour over. I may leave, but not before I tell him exactly how I feel.

"Why not?" I repeat, incredulously. "Why not?! You. Kidnapped. Me.

"You kidnapped Abby! You took my baby sister, just because you wanted to see if I was a Dreamer who was powerful enough to do you work! You've tried reducing me to a weapon, an object. You even try to rename me, because somehow, you've got it in your head that you own me!"

I'm now shouting, but I don't care anymore.

"You purposely make me get to know kids who need me, so that I'll be distracted from Abby, and always feeling guilty. You hunted me down like an animal, and have tried to isolate me, so that I don't trust anyone but you! You've hurt the people I care about; the people I love. You toss me in a cage like I'm your goddamned _pet. _From the beginning, you've manipulated me, hurt me, threatened me, never once bothered to try to kiss me, treated me like a-"

Pan suddenly teleports in front of me, grinning.

"What was that?" he asks grinning.

I blink, and try to hide my shock. I really, really didn't want to say that.

_But I kinda had to. _

"So, you want me to kiss you?" he asks, looking like Christmas came early.

_Oh, God. He likes this. He's going to, I know it..._

"N-No," I stammer. "Th-that's not-"

Pan cuts me off, cupping my face with one hand, clearly enjoying this new hold he has over me. His hand is icy cold, and I shudder at his touch. If he can tell I'm shaking, he doesn't say anything.

Suddenly, beneath the dark feeling I get from him, I sense the bean. He has it.

"How 'bout a little deal, Vin," he says, his voice becoming seductively low. "I kiss you, and you stay."

_In your dreams, fly boy._

"If you think-" I start, but I'm cut off when Pan pulls me forward with one hand, and kisses me on the mouth.

Every girl talks about the first kiss being a magical thing, but I'm just scared to death.

His kiss is not a warm, gentle, or passionate kiss. It's cold, hard, and possessive.

_Like I'm already his toy, and he owns me. He can play with me whatever way he wants. _

_God, why am I shaking so much?_

It's only after he stops that I realize that I hadn't breathed through that entire thing.

He cups my face again, forcing me to look into his eyes.

"Well?" he asks, in his seductive voice.

I blink, and look down. That's when I see it. Around his neck, on a chain, like the butterfly necklace I'm wearing now. The bean.

I look up, and allow myself to smile, triumphantly. The smile only grows at his confused look.

"I prefer the acorn," I reply, remembering the story of what happened when Wendy tried to give Pan a kiss.

Pan blinks, not understanding the reference.

Then, a purple glow starts to surround his lips, and slowly grows around him. His eyes grow wide with realization, just as the glow encases his face, then his body, freezing him in place, the squid ink taking full effect.

With a grin, I yank the bean from around his neck, and pull, breaking the chain. I use the back of my hand to wipe away the last of the squid ink from my lips, and give him a short, mocking bow.

"Good game, Peter Pan," I say. "But you lost."

I'm tempted to hit him before going, just to make him pay for what he did to me with Toodles. With the cage, and music. But hitting someone when they're frozen seems wrong, even with Pan.

With one last grin, I imagine a trail leading me too Bae or Hook, whoever is closer, and take off running, leaving Pan frozen behind me.

It isn't until I'm too far away to sense him that I break out laughing.

_I….just kissed Peter Pan. And used it to freeze him._

Well, more he kissed me, but still, that was great!

Not that he kissed me, but that I was able to beat him at his own game. He wanted to manipulate me; to get under my skin. To control me again. I let him think that he could by kissing me.

He thought he was manipulating me, but really, I was manipulating him. And now, I have the bean.

As soon as I find Bae and Hook, we can get out of here. We can go home.

I see the trail coming towards the end at a clearing. I see a leather clad figure anxiously pacing across, as if waiting for someone.

_I guess Hook was closer. _

"Hook!" I call out, running into the clearing.

He turns and sees me, and relief floods his face.

"Lass?" he asks, as I come into plain view. "Thank the gods, are you alright?"

I nod, eagerly.

Hook looks me up and down, like he always does when we meet, checking to see if I'm hurt.

"What happened?" he asks. "I've waited over an hour and half, but when neither you are Baelfire appeared, I started to get worried."

"Things got complicated on the way to Bae," I reply. "The Lost Boys caught up to me, and took the bean away. But, I was able to get it back; look."

I hold out the bean for him to see. While it was with Pan, it has started to shrivel up again, so I have to restore it to normal.

Hook picks it up, and examines it.

"Is it like the one that you used?" I ask.

I want to be sure. I can't fail with this bean.

"Aye," replies Hook. "Exactly the same. It even has that feeling when you touch it, of knowing it will take you where you are thinking of."

I breathe a sigh of relief. It should work then.

"How did you get it back?" Hook asks, sounding curious.

I can't suppress a grin, as recall what I did only a few minutes ago.

"I may have tricked Pan into kissing me while I had squid ink on my lips," I reply innocently.

Hook's eyes widen with surprise, and he starts to laugh the same way I did.

"You didn't?" he asks, sounding half in awe, half amused.

"I did," I reply. "I know; I can't believe I did it either."

Hook just shakes his head before handing me back the bean.

"Only you would do that, lass," he mutters as I take the bean. "Only you. I can see why Pan wanted you so badly."

"Don't worry," says someone from behind. "He still wants her. We all do."

Hook and I turn, startled, as Rufio emerges from the clearing, a wicked grin on his face. Immediately, Hook steps defensively in front of me, his hand on his sword hilt, as if waiting to pull it out. If I thought I was scared when I met Felix, that has nothing on what I feel when I see Rufio.

_I almost killed his brother. He was the one who made me dance. _

"You should go back, boy," says Hook, seriously. "I don't want to kill a lad, but I will if you try to take her."

I can't help but be surprised at this. For all of Hook's anger and hate towards Pan, he doesn't want to hurt Rufio. I never thought I'd see that in him.

Rufio, however, just smirks.

"Well then we have a problem, Captain," he says. "See, I'm not here for the girl. I'm here for you."

Hook glances at me, but I'm just as confused as he is.

"You and Vin have gotten pretty close, Captain," Rufio continues. "Pan isn't pleased by this. He thinks that it's about time that you rejoined the rest of your crew."

I see Hook's hand grasp the hilt of his sword, his knuckles white with tension.

"Hook?" I ask quietly.

"If Pan wants to kill me, he'll have to do it himself," Hook says to Rufio, not looking at me.

I can tell that Hook is trying to stay calm, but I can hear the anger in his voice. Rufio shrugs.

"Sorry," he says. "That honor goes to me. And killing you in front of Vin will be payback for what she did to my brother."

I feel my heart stop at this.

_He means it. He is willing to kill Hook to get payback on me. _

"If you want revenge, Rufio," I whisper. "Then keep it between you and me. Hook wasn't the one who fired the arrow."

"I know," replies Rufio, casually. "But the captain has killed many of our men. He invaded our island. Even now, he is trying to take Pan's precious Dreamer away. I think it's time he got his wish. Even if it means abandoning you, Vin, he won't object to being reunited with his Milah."

At this, Hook draws his sword with an angry yell, and charges at Rufio. Immediately, Rufio pulls out his own blade, and deflects Hook's blow.

"Hook!" I shout, imagining a knife for me.

_I don't care about the cost. I don't care if I have to cross the line that I swore I wouldn't, I'm not letting Hook die. _

But as I run to help, Hook shoves me aside, as he dodges Rufio's jab at him.

"Stay out of this, lass!" he yells, striking at Rufio.

I ignore him, and try to get in the fight again, only to be pushed to the ground by Rufio, with a blow that knocks the wind out of me.

As I try to refill my lungs, I see Hook desperately avoiding Rufio's blade, as if the tiniest of cuts could kill him. Rufio seems to have realized this as well, pushing Hook back as he tries to cut Hook anywhere on his bare skin. For the first time, I see fear flash in Hook's eyes.

_No. I'm not letting this happen. I won't let Hook die. _

Hook barely avoids getting cut across his face by a strike. Rufio nearly had him.

Suddenly, I remember the night I read _The Princess Bride _to the Lost Boys. How I threw the knives at Pan because I was angry at him. How I almost hit him.

_Maybe...Oh, please let this work. _

I grasp my knife, getting ready to throw it.

"Hook, get out of the way!" I shout.

Luckily, Hook obeys without hesitation, just as Rufio makes a long swipe with his blade. I throw the knife, not at Rufio, but at his hand.

What happens next happens so fast that I could miss it if I wasn't watching. My knife barely misses Rufio's hand, but as it spins over his hand, it cuts him across his fist. It's enough for Rufio to cry out in shock, and drop his sword. Immediately, Hook drops his own sword, and grabs Rufio's.

Without second thought, he plunges it into Rufio's chest with an enraged yell.

For a single second that seems to take forever to pass, all three of us stare at the sword in shocked silence. Then, Rufio crumbles to the ground, clutching his chest. In that second, I don't see the angry, vengeful Lost Boy who made me dance, and tried to kill Hook. I see a scared boy who is dying.

With one hand he clutches the wound, holding out his other hand. I don't even stop to think; I immediately kneel next to him and take his empty hand. Hook stands to the side, still looking like he's in shock.

Rufio's eyes meet mine, and I again see the scared, confused boy behind them. And despite everything he's done to me, I know I can't bring myself to leave him. To let him die alone. That is a fate I wouldn't wish on the worst of my enemies, even Pan.

I hear him cough, as if choking on his own blood.

"Hey, it's okay," I murmur gently. "It's okay."

At my voice, Rufio stirs slightly, and makes another sound, as if trying to speak.

"F-Felix," he manages to get out. "I...want...Felix."

_Oh, God, how am I supposed to respond to this? How can I tell him that the person he wants-needs-the most isn't here? That it is only the two people he wanted to kill with him._

"I'm sorry," I whisper. "He isn't here. I'm so sorry, Rufio."

At this, his eyes light up, as if remembering something.

"S-S-Sebastian," he chokes out.

I shake my head, confused.

_Who is Sebastian? Another Lost Boy? A friend from before he and Felix were taken to Neverland? _

"I'm sorry," I whisper again. "I don't know who Sebastian is."

Rufio shakes his head slightly, and holds my hand even tighter.n

"No," he says. "My...name...Sebastian. Before...Pan...took us. Felix…held out...longer...but didn't...resist...Pan changing...his name...so he got to keep it...but...I…"

He cuts off, coughing and choking, a small dribble of blood falling from his mouth. He doesn't need to finish, though. I can fill in the blanks. He resisted his name getting changed, like I did. He tried to insist that he was Sebastian. So when he finally gave in, he became Rufio. Just like how I would become Vin if I gave in.

"Please…" Rufio whispers. "I...don't want to die...as Rufio...I want to die as...Sebastian."

With that, I give his hand a reassuring squeeze.

"It's alright," I murmur. "It's alright...Sebastian."

I see a flicker of light, or joy somewhere in his eyes, before they stare off into nothing. I feel his hand go limp in mine. With a small gasp, I gently pull my hand from his grip, as if not to wake him.

Feeling it would only be right, I slide two fingers across his eyes, and close them. With his eyes closed, he truly looks different from the Lost Boy I knew.

_Untroubled, innocent, peaceful. _

He doesn't look like Rufio at all. Maybe, this was what he looked like as Sebastian, before Pan took him. Before he gave in.

_Yet, at the last moment, he was resisting Pan. He was free of Pan's hold on him, in the end. _

_He wasn't Rufio in the end. He was Sebastian. _

I don't know if I really ever cared for him the same way I care about the Lost Boys. He helped Pan hurt me too many times to count. Yet, he died free of Pan. In spite of all he did to me, I can't help but admire him for that.

I stand up, letting him go.

"Good-bye, _Sebastian_," I whisper.

I take a deep breath, and turn to Hook, who seems to have recovered.

"Come on, Hook," I say. "I can't stand being on this island any longer."

* * *

**A/N: **Well, that was eventful. The first kiss, Rufio's death...

For those of you who may be confused. Jess had taken one of the phials of squid ink, and put on her lips like lip-gloss after she left the storeroom. That's how the squid ink was on her lips when Pan kissed her. Anyway, I hope y'all liked the scene!

A special thanks to **hic-sunt-dracones, SlytherinBlonde, **and **asdfghjkl292** for putting this story on alert, and to **SlytherinBlonde **for favoriting Fading Away. Also, thank you **Ode to a Fangirl, scorpiongirl92, meguhanu, asdfghjkl1292, SansaFort, **and fhfkjk for reviewing. And, of course, a special thanks to my awesome betas, **Uncommon fairy, **and **Can't-Escape-My-Fandoms**! You guys are all amazing; thank you so much!

Please follow, favorite, review, or whatever y'all want. Thoughts on Rufio's death and the kiss are especially appreciated.


	22. Chapter 22

**Disclaimer: I remember! I don't own OUAT! Wait, I don't? Well, now I know why I wanted to forget in the first place.**

* * *

I imagine a trail leading to Bae, and Hook and I follow it in silence. There really isn't much either of can say. Not that we really want to say anything.

It's not that I'm angry at Hook. I understand that he did what he had to do when he killed Rufio-_no, Sebastian- _and that he would have died if he didn't. Just as he would have died if I hadn't thrown the knife. I can't blame myself for what happened after. I was helping Hook, I wasn't trying to kill.

Not like I did when I fired that arrow at Felix.

But still, I can't help replaying the scene in my mind over and over. How Hook kept having to duck out of the way of Sebastian's sword. And the first thing he did when Sebastian dropped his sword was drop his own and use Sebastian's instead.

"Why did you use his sword?" I murmur, breaking the stoic silence.

Hook glances at me, but doesn't answer.

_Not answering me. That's not like Hook. He must be taking this harder than I thought._

"Hook," I prod.

Normally, I wouldn't push it. But...I don't know. Maybe it's that Sebastian died telling me who he truly was. Maybe it's just that I was there. Either way, something inside me needs to know why he had to die by his own sword.

Something about that just seems wrong. It wouldn't be something that Hook would do. He believes in good form too much. Killing a boy by his own sword, no matter how provoked, doesn't seem like a line he would cross.

Hook stops and sighs, running his hand through his hair, as if he's trying to gather his thoughts. I don't say anything, but I do give him a pensive look.

"I did it for the dreamshade," he finally replies.

"The what?" I ask, unfamiliar with the term.

"Dreamshade," he replies. "A rare poison that grows on this island. You get scratched with it, and you're dead. Pan always has his boys lace their weapons with it."

That explains why he was so desperate to not be touched. And why he took Sebastian's weapon over his own.

_Dreamshade must have been what Pan dipped those arrows in,_ I realize. _It must have also been the poison I threw at him all that time ago._

"Is there any antidote?" I ask.

It's not that I want to know if Sebastian could have lived. Even if Hook used his own sword, Sebastian would die from being stabbed in the chest. But, I'm curious to know how Pan expects his boys to survive, especially considering how much the boys fight.

"Aye," says Hook quietly. "There's a special water that you can drink that will save you. But, there's a price. Once you drink the water, you're bound to Neverland. You can't leave without dying."

I shudder at the thought.

"I'd rather take the poison," I mutter, being totally honest.

_Dying would be better than having to spend eternity with Pan. Knowing that I couldn't escape. Couldn't be free. That Abby would be out there somewhere, waiting for the sister that could never come..._

I see Hook nod, but his eyes have some far off look in them.

_There's something he's not telling me. Something he doesn't want to tell. _

But, that can wait. I'm going to be spending plenty of time with him when we look for the bean in the Enchanted Forest. If he wants to tell me, he'll probably do it there.

"Aye, lass," he says. "Me too."

We continue to walk on in silence, until the trail ends at Bae's cave.

I immediately rush forward, a feeling of relief pouring over me. After everything that's happened tonight, with the little ones, with Pan's kiss, with Sebastian dying, I'm glad I'll be able to see a friendly face. Bae's especially.

"Bae!" I call out, rushing forward. "Bae, it's me!"

I run to the vine that open the cave door, and start to pull. Hook immediately comes and gives me a hand (literally). As soon as the door is open high enough for me to get through, I crawl through the small opening into the cave.

"Bae?" I call again.

I imagine the torch that lights the cave burning, and I can see Bae stretching from the alcove where he usually sleeps. I guess I woke him up.

"Jess?" he murmurs, slowly rising to his feet. "What is it? I thought you were at the caves."

"Yeah, I was," I reply, walking over to him. "But I left. Bae, I can get us out of Neverland."

That does the trick. Immediately, all signs of sleepiness are gone, and Bae's posture becomes more alert.

"How?" he asks.

In answer, I open my hand, showing him the bean. His eyes widen, as he takes in what is.

"Jess.." he whispers. "That's not...you didn't…"

"Yeah," I answer, grinning. "It's a magical bean."

I can't help but feel a small surge of pride at that. I was able to imagine a bean. _I_ was.

"Then come on," says Bae, a grin of his own spreading across his face. "Use it."

"No, not right now," I reply, shaking my head. "We're going to take it to _The Roger_, that way Hook can get home, too. Then, we'll find a bean in the Enchanted Forest and use that."

At this, I see Bae's face fall. I sigh, realizing what's coming.

"Look, Bae," I start, bracing myself for the storm. "I know you don't like Hook. I get that. Heck, I can understand why you don't. But, Bae, this could be our only chance to get out. Pan already knows that I made this bean. Once we're out, we can decide whether or not we stay with Hook. But, if we're ever going to get out of Neverland, we need to trust Hook, and leave _now._"

I see something flash in Bae's eyes, and I can't tell if it's hatred or anger. Probably both.

"I'd cut off my own hand before I trust that pirate," he practically snarls.

I roll my eyes.

_Why does this kid have to be so stubborn about everything?_

"Bae, you were able to trust him to rescue me," I insist. "Why can't you trust him now?"

"That was different," Bae replies. "I knew he'd be willing to help me save you. But not with this."

I shake my head, trying so hard not to scream in exasperation.

"Bae, I've spent almost as much time with Hook as I have with you," I say, trying to keep my voice level. "If there's one thing I've realized, it's that he wants to get out of Neverland just as much as you do."

"I'm not talking about getting out of Neverland!" shouts Bae. "I'm talking about afterwards. Jess, he's tricking you; don't you see that? The fairy who gave me the bean told me that it was the last one they had. Hook knows that.

"If we go, we're just going to be trapped in the Enchanted Forest. And after that, do you think he's going to let us go? He cares about you, Jess; anyone can see it. He's not going to just let you leave. You're never going to get home if you trust him."

_Oh my God, why does this kid have to be so stubborn? _

"Bae, listen to me," I say insistently. "I have gone through too much tonight. I have had to leave behind kids who were relying on me. I have watched someone die. I am leaving tonight, and I promised you we would get out together. So, please, for once, forgive Hook enough for us to get away."

Bae shakes his head. I want so badly to push it, when I pause. I see something in his eyes. The same stubbornness that I have felt since Pan started calling me 'Vin.' That refusal to acknowledge, no matter what someone does for you, you can never truly forgive them for what they have done to you.

_I can't push him, _I realize. _No matter what, he's never going to let go of his anger at Hook. _

"Please, Bae," I whisper. "Don't do this. You're like a brother to me. I can't leave you, especially here. Come with me."

I already hate myself for leaving the younger boys. I don't know if I can live with myself if I leave Bae behind.

_But I have to go. Before Pan finds me, and locks me in the cage, only taking me out when he wants me to dance…_

I see Bae shake his head.

"Can't you just make two beans, and give one to Hook?" he asks.

"No," I reply, shaking my head. "It takes too much energy."

Bae nods, then sighs.

"Get out of here, Jess," he says. "Get home. Get back to Abby. Get out before Pan catches you again."

He means it. He isn't going to go. He won't leave with Hook involved. If I had any other choice, I would just insist that Hook come with us to my world, but I know he won't accept that.

I can't leave Bae behind. But I can't stay. But he won't come. So, instead of arguing, I pull the little stubborn brat into a tight hug.

"I swear," I whisper. "I swear, I will get you out of here. If I have to get the shadow to take me back to get you out of here, I will. I'm going to get you out."

Bae responds by hugging me back.

"I know you will," he mutters. "But be careful. Don't trust Hook."

We part, and look each other in the eyes.

"Good-bye, Jess," he says, holding out his hand.

I look at his hand, then back at him.

"Never say 'good-bye,'" I reply, remembering another Peter Pan quote. "Saying good-bye means going away and forgetting. And I'm not forgetting about you, Bae. This isn't good-bye. I _will_ get you out of Neverland."

I take his hand, but instead of shaking it, I pull him into another hug. Part of me doesn't want to let go, but I know time is running out.

"Take care of yourself, until then," I whisper.

"I will," Bae replies. "I promise."

I want so badly to tell him that I love him, the same way I do Abby. But that would make seem all too final. Like this is truly good-bye. But this isn't.  
_I don't care if I have to get the shadow to take me back, and tie up every Lost Boy. I will get my brother out of this._

We part, all too soon in my opinion, and I'm suddenly aware of Hook calling to me from outside the cave. I turn, and glance back at Bae, apologetically.

"It's okay," he mutters. "But, Jess, whatever you do, don't trust him."

"And you," I reply. "You be careful."

I go to the edge of the cave, and turn to get one last look.

"I will get you out this, I promise," I insist.

"I know you will, now go!" calls Bae.

I force myself to leave the cave. This isn't good-bye. I know that. But still, that doesn't make leaving Bae any easier.

It's as if the guilt I felt for leaving the younger boys doubles. I'm leaving him behind. I know I shouldn't; that I should insist that Hook knock him out and take him with us. But I won't do that. Not to Bae.

As I emerge, I see Hook waiting anxiously.

"The Lost Boys are starting to search all over," he says, as soon as he sees me. "They must have realized what happened to Rufio."

"Sebastian," I mutter, correcting him.

Hook blinks, as if surprised, but continues.

"Aye," he says. "Either way, we've got to get moving. They'll-"

He cuts off, realizing now that I came out alone.

"Where's-" he starts, but I shake my head, trying hold back tears.

"He's not coming," I mutter.

_I'm going to go back. I don't care what it takes, I'm going to come back and save Bae. _

I see Hook look at me sympathetically, but I brush it off. I don't need sympathy. Not now. Not when I feel so guilty.

"Oh, lass," he says. "I'm sorry."

I let his apology wash over me. What he says won't change the fact that I feel like a horrible person for what I'm doing.

"Come on," I whisper. "Let's just get out of here. Let's go home."

Hook opens his mouth, as if he wants to say something, but he seems to think better of it. That's good. I don't need a pity party right now.

"Alright, lass," he says. "Let's go home."

He looks back out in front of us, and I know he's thinking the same thing I am. We're not going to be able to reach _The Roger _in time. Not without running into the Lost Boys, who have no doubt found Pan and Sebastian. And I don't think that Hook wants to kill any more boys tonight.

"Don't worry. I have a quicker way than walking," I say, reaching into my pocket.

With a small smile, I pull out the Pixie Dust phial I swiped in the store rooms. Hook looks at it, but shakes his head.

"I told you, lass," he says. "It won't work on me. I'm an adult, remember?"

"It doesn't matter," I reply with a shrug. "You just have to believe. And trust me, Hook, when I say that I believe."

_After all that's happened to me, ever since Abby got taken, I'd be a fool not to. _

With that, I uncork the phial, and once again, the green dust surrounds me and Hook. I see his eyes widen as we start to hover off the ground.

"Come on," I say, reaching out my hand. "Let's go home."

With a small, amazed laugh, Hook takes my hand, and allows me to focus on flying to _The Roger_. As we fly, I close my eyes, and take in the feeling. This is the last time I'll be able to truly fly. It may be the only thing I will truly miss in Neverland.

_Except for the boys and Bae. Those who I am abandoning_.

_But I'm not abandoning Bae,_ I tell myself. _I am coming back for him as soon as possible._

"Lass?"

Hook's voice comes over the loud wind that whips past us as we fly. I open my eyes, and I see that we are about twenty feet from _The Roger_ and still pretty high up. Frantically, I start to focus on landing on the deck of the ship. Our landing definitely isn't soft, but after spending three days locked in a cage, I've learned to endure.

"So that's flying," Hook says, as he helps me up.  
"Amazing, isn't it?" I ask, handing him the bean.

He glances down at it, and back at me.

"Take us home, Hook," I say, smiling.

With a grin, he takes the bean and hurls it at the water. Immediately, a large whirlpool forms where the bean lands. That must be the portal.

"Alright, lass and lads," cries Hook, as he runs towards the helm. "Hold on tight. It's time to go home!"

I twist my arms around one of the ships many ropes, and can't help but join what's left of the crew in shouting in joy.

_Back home. Back to plain, boring, wonderful home. Back to Abby, Mom, Roxanne.._

I steal one last glance at Neverland. I went through so much, suffered so much in this place. But, I admit, part of me is going to miss it.

_But I will return. For Bae, I'll return._

That's when I feel it. The dark, twisted sense, growing rapidly stronger.

_But that's impossible. I froze Pan. I got him to kiss me to do it. How could he possibly…_

_It's not Pan, _ I realize, fear suddenly building within me. _It's the shadow. _

"Hook!" I call out frantically. "The shadow, it's coming!"

I see realization dawn on Hook's face and he immediately calls for Smee to take the helm. Rushing over to me, he pulls me away from the rope I was holding onto, and steps down hard on one of the ship's many planks. It must be loose because it immediately gives away under the pressure of Hook's foot, leaving a hole about the size of my wrist in width.

"Put your foot in there, lass!" he calls over the noise of the water.

"How will that help?" I ask, feeling the shadow getting closer.

"It will hold for a few minutes, and that's all we need," he replies.

Without hesitation, I force my foot into the opening, and hold back a small groan as the wood digs into my ankle from both sides.

"Just hold on now, lass," Hook shouts over the roar of the whirlpool, as _The Roger_ starts to fall through the portal. "We're almost home."

Suddenly, the dark feeling becomes stronger than ever. I only look up in time to see the shadow swooping down from above me, and feel a second of panic before it grabs me around the middle, pinning my arms to the side.

I scream as it suddenly pulls me out with a strong, forceful pull, and a sudden pain shoots through my ankle.

"LASS!"

Hook suddenly leaps up, and grabs me by the collar of my shirt, the butterfly necklace twisting in his fingers, his hook sunk in the wood of the ship, holding him down. The ship suddenly goes fully into the portal, and Hook loses his footing. But still, he hangs on, not looking at the shadow, but at me.

I only have time to register the same protective fear I felt the night that Abby was taken.

"Captain, NO!"

Without warning, Smee leaps up, and grabs Hook, pulling him back. Suddenly, the chain of the butterfly necklace snaps, and I feel the cloth of my shirt tear. Hook has lost his hold on me!

"No! No, HOOK!" I scream, as he falls back with his ship, just as it completely falls through the portal.

For one terrifying split second, my eyes meet Hook's. I only have time to see him land on the deck of _The Roger _before the portal closes behind him, permanently separating us.

* * *

**A/N:** And that's how Hook got out of Neverland...

I'm glad y'all liked the last chapter. It seems y'all liked the kiss a lot. Though someone did point out a plot-hole to me, that Jess should have been frozen to, if she had squid ink on her lips. I can understand if y'all were confused. If you were, here's how it worked:

I watched the episodes where the Squid Ink is mentioned, it always said that it could freeze magical creatures, not humans with magic. So, by that sense, the Squid Ink wouldn't work on Jess, like it may not work on Regina or Emma.  
Now, with Rumple, or Pan, who have let magic delude their humanity so much that they are more imp or magical being than a human with magic, like with Regina, Emma, or even Henry, they would be affected by the ink. That's why Jess could put the ink on her lips, and not get frozen, while Pan did.

I hope that explains it. I'm sorry for any confusion y'all had.

Anyway, a special thanks to **AlyssalovesMarko, Madhatter-in-training, kirbey unknown 7148, **and **KarwaPallo** for putting this story on alert, and to **AlyssalovesMarko, **and **kirbey unknown 7148** for favoriting it. Also, thank you **Kitten825, Ode to a Fangirl, FurySaidtoaMouse, scorpiongirl92, meguhanu, Female whovian, **Sansafort, and The white angel for your amazing reviews. And, of course, a special thanks to my awesome betas, **Uncommon fairy, **and **Can't-Escape-My-Fandoms**. **  
**

Please follow, favorite, review, or whatever y'all want. Thoughts on what's going to happen next, anyone? **:)**


	23. Chapter 23

**Disclaimer: I still don't own OUAT. I also don't own the Doctor Who soundtrack song, Doomsday, which I highly recommend for reading Hook's point of view. **

**A/N: **Okay, I know I don't usually put these at the beginning, but I just have to say something before y'all read this chapter: Please don't hate me for this.

* * *

Killian was on his feet as soon as _The Roger_ was out of the portal and on the water. He could still feel the adrenaline that caused him to jump and grab Jess coursing through him. He could still see the fear in her eyes, her panicked scream ringing in his ears.

As soon as he was on his feet he ran to the stern, not looking for land, but at the sky. At the stars. The rest of his crew were slowly rising to their feet, groaning, as he searched rapidly in the night sky.

"Captain?" called Smee hesitantly.

Killian didn't respond. He saw it. So far away, so unreachable. The second star to the right. Neverland.

He had made it back to the Enchanted Forest. But Jess was still in Neverland. He had lost her.

It was as if the crocodile had ripped out his own heart and crushed it.

She was gone. That bright, stubborn, beautiful lass was still in Neverland. The only person who had ever made him feel again since he traded Baelfire to Pan. Gone.

He let out the breath he was holding, trying everything to comprehend it. But nothing he tried could work. He hadn't been able to hold on. He had failed her.

_How ironic_, Killian realized. _I spent centuries in Neverland, trying to get out. Now I want nothing more than to go in and get her out. _

He was hoping-praying-that she had gotten out of the shadow's grip, and made another bean to bring her home. To her family. To her mother, and her little sister. But he didn't know. He would never know. He was out of Neverland, but at the price of Jess.

He was never going to see her again. Never be able to see that cute way her eyes crinkled when she smiled. Never be able to hear her laugh, never be able to hold her when she needed someone.

How was he supposed to live with that? How was he supposed to pretend that it was alright that he was never going to see her again? Was he supposed to just move on? Let the pain he felt go?

Forget about the girl who he loved like a daughter?

His heart was still with Milah, and he had lost her centuries ago. He had taught himself to numb the pain, to channel it towards finding a way to kill the crocodile. But losing Jess was like reopening every wound that he had ever healed.

What was worse is that he _knew_ she was alive. He knew that she was somewhere in Neverland, trying to run from Pan, so that she could escape to her little sister. But even if she got out, even if she made another bean and went back to her own world, he was never going to see her again. He was in the Enchanted Forest, she was in her own world.

Without the chance to say good-bye, without the chance to take one last look at her. She was just...ripped from him without warning.

He never got to say good-bye to her. Now, he would be spending the rest of his life wondering what would have happened if he had held on tighter, if he had found some other place for her to hold onto, if he had gotten _The Roger _to the portal a little faster. What would have happened if they had at least ended things on their own terms. If they had the chance to part the way they had wanted.

But that would never happen. She was in Neverland. He was back home, back to where he belonged.

_Back to where all I have left is revenge,_ he thought bitterly. _Whereas in Neverland, I at least had a purpose. To look after that lass. To keep her safe…_

Perhaps it was better this way. At least now he could pursue the crocodile without worrying about her getting hurt. Without the distraction of Jess turning him away from revenge. But, he almost wished that she would be there, as a distraction, because at least the lass would _be there._

Killian was suddenly aware that he still held the butterfly necklace in his fist. The chain had broken, but the pendant was still intact. It had been Milah's. Giving it to Jess was his way of telling her that she had come to mean as much to him as Milah had. Now, he had lost them both. And all he had left was one broken necklace.

Part of him wanted to throw it out into the open sea, and let the pain end, but he knew he couldn't bring himself to do it.

It represented too much. The love that he and Milah had shared. The love he had grown to have for that bright lass. The special place both women held in his heart. His failure to save either of them. The necklace represented too much to throw away.

"Captain?" Smee called again, hesitation still in his voice.

Smee. The man who pulled him back. The reason he wasn't able to hold onto Jess. The reason he had lost her.

Killian wanted to turn and plunge his hook into the man there and now, but part of him-maybe the part that Jess held-would not let him. Not when he knew that Smee was only worried about his safety.

Yes, Smee was always worried for _Killian's safety._ Never the lass'. He always saw her as a danger, not the person Killian could see her for.

"Would be best if you didn't speak, Mr. Smee," he said, his voice coming out slurred, as if he had drunk too much rum.

He could really use some rum right now…

"In fact, it would be better if you got off on the next port," he muttered, almost to himself.

His crew was waiting on him. Relying on him. He had gotten them out, as he had hoped. He just hadn't been able to get Jess out, liked he had promised himself he would. But he didn't want too.

_There's nothing you can do_, he told himself. _She's gone, and you're never going to see her again. The crew, they need you right now. _

But he had just lost her. Couldn't he mourn, for just a little? Couldn't he just let the pain hurt him, just for a little bit, before he turned and tried to numb himself?

She was gone. He would never know what happened to her. Whether she got out, whether she found her family. Whether she ever truly saw him as a father the same way he had seen her as a daughter...

He looked down at the necklace again.

He was going to miss her. He knew that. No matter what happened now, no matter how deep he got involved in his vengeance, the lass would always hold a special place in his heart.

With that thought, he clutched the necklace tighter.

Why him? Why of all people, did Killian have to be the one to lose the people he loved? He had lost Liam, Milah, and now Jess. Why did fate hate him so much?

"Captain, where are we headed?" asked one of the crew. Killian was too lost in his own thoughts to recognize who asked.

Did any of that matter anymore? She was _gone_.

"Captain Jones?" they prodded.

Captain Jones. Something just seemed wrong with that to Killian. Too...stiff, too common.

What was it that Jess had always called him?

"No," he murmured.

He forced himself to turn away from the star she was trapped in, despite all the pain it caused him. He looked up at his crew, and finally met their eyes.

"Not Captain Jones," he said in a louder voice. "Not Killian Jones."

_Not anymore_. _Captain Jones died the moment he met that lass. _

"It's Hook, now, mates," he said. "Captain _Hook_."

* * *

For a moment, I can only stare at the water in blind shock, unable to process what just happened. It all seemed to have happened so fast. Too fast. There's no way it could have really happened...right?

"Hook!" I shout, at the water, as if it will bring him back. "Hook!"

I know it won't work though. Deep down, I know he's gone. He got away.

_And I'm still in Neverland. And Pan's shadow has me. _

The memory seems to jolt me back to reality. I feel the shadow's icy arms wrapped around me, and the twisted sense is so powerful that I feel like I'm going to throw up. I don't remember the dark feeling my sixth sense giving me ever being this intense.

_It's Pan, _I realize. _He's angry, and darker than ever. It's affecting the shadow._

Which means I'm in more danger than ever.

Real fear rushes through me. Fear I haven't felt since Pan almost pulled Abby into Neverland. Immediately, I start to twist, struggle, and kick in the shadow's grip. Pain shoots through my ankle as I try to kick, but I don't care anymore.

I may have failed to escape. I may not have been able to get out with Hook. But I'm not letting Pan take me again. I'm not going to let him touch me anymore. I don't care if the shadow drops me into the water here and now, I am not going back to Pan.

The shadow doesn't seem to be affected at all by my struggles. Instead, it just grips me tighter, and flies back to the island.

_No! I'm not going back there! Not back to Pan. Not back to the children crying, not back to the cage, the music. Not back to being 'Vin.'_

I try imagining a match, or a torch, or anything that will get the shadow to let go of me. But my mind is too clouded by my fear. I can't imagine anything. My last weapon is gone.

_Oh, God! I can't do anything! It won't let me go, and it's taking me back to Pan. I can't get out of this one…_

Panic hits me with this realization, and I can't stop the scream that escapes me. The shadow ignores my screams, and continues to fly, not over the jungle towards Pan's camp, but towards the sole mountain of Neverland.

I can sense the dark feeling almost double.

Oh no…he's waiting for me. Which means the squid ink wore off…

_I'm dead. _

I lose my head at this point. I'm not sure what I'm doing. It's as if my mind has gone blank, and some animal inside me takes over. I scream, struggle, try to bite down at the shadow. Anything that will get it to let me go. I don't care if I fall and die. It is better than the alternative.

I'm suddenly aware that the shadow has stopped, and his hovering over a peak on the mountain, still holding me tight in its grip.

Standing on the peak, an expression of anger and resolve, is Pan.

If the realization of him being here made me lose my head, actually seeing him makes get myself back together.

I'm scared to death right now. I know he has something planned. But, if I'm going to get out of this, I need to keep my head. It's the only way to beat him.

The peak is mostly rocks, but on the end closest to the mountain are strange plants, growing in vines. Just by looking at them, I get the feeling that these plants are deadly. Like one would die just by getting pricked by their thorns.

Behind the plants, I can hear the sound of rushing water, and I can barely make out a waterfall behind the plants, that flows down into a small pool.

_Dreamshade,_ I realize.

The plants are dreamshade. Why would Pan have me brought here of all…

_No...he wouldn't….he's not planning to kill me...not after everything. _

I can feel the panic building up again, and I fight to remain calm.

_I have to stay calm. I cannot let lose myself. I lost myself for one moment with the arrow, and he was able to control me. I'm not going to let him have control over me anymore. _

"You almost got out, Vin," says Pan.

I start in surprise. I had expected him to brag. To say that there was no way that I could get out. That he will always stop me. That there is no way I'm ever getting out of Neverland.

Not admit that I almost made it.

"You almost got out, Vin," he says again. "And you would have made it if it weren't for the shadow."

Somehow, I'm able to find my voice.

"I'll do it again," I reply, not bothering to let my hatred come in my voice. "You can't have your shadow hold onto me forever, Pan. As soon as you take your eyes off of me, I will be gone, and back home."

Pan only gives me a hard stare. He doesn't rise to the occasion, doesn't start to try to persuade me that there really is no escape.

"I know," he replies.

_Wait, what? He knows?_

This is so unlike Pan. I have never seen him like this. He's so serious. What is he playing at?

_He's not playing anymore, _I realize. _It's more than that. _

The only time I saw him like this was when he tried to make me beg for mercy. Except now, he's much more...I don't know what he is. But it is beyond wanting petty revenge.

"I always knew that you would try to escape, Vin," he says. "I always knew that spirit in you would drive you to get back to the little girl. But I underestimated your desperation. That you would be willing to abandon the younger boys, even abandon Baelfire to get back to your sister."

"It wasn't just getting back to Abby," I reply, spitefully. "It was at first. But after what you did to me, with the cage, with the arrow, with the music, it went beyond getting back home. It was escaping _you._"

I don't care if he knows. He already he knows my deepest secret, he has already hurt me too much. He has made me go through too much.

"I don't care what you do to me," I continue. "I don't care anymore. The only thing you can do to me now is kill me."

At this, Pan gets his smirk back, and for a moment, he looks like the Pan I know. I'm not sure if that's a good thing. But, in a flash, the smirk is gone, and he's back to being the serious, real monster that scares me more than ever.

He walks over to me, and looks me in the eye.

"I'm not killing you, Vin," he says. "But I've come too far to let you go. If I have to clip your wings...so be it."

_Clip my wings? What is he talking about?_

He can't be saying that he's going to try to take away my ability to imagine. That would be pointless. That was why he wanted me in the first place, because I was powerful.

The shadow sets me down without warning, and I let out a hiss, as pain shoots through my foot as I land. Pan's back is to me, and he waves his hand over the vines.

_This could be my chance. I could run now…_

I try to stand, but as soon as I put weight on my bad ankle, I go down again. I hear the vines twisting and snapping, and I look up. Pan has parted the vines to reveal the pool behind the dreamshade. A waterfall flows into the pool, and it looks like it's just an ordinary pool of water.

But I can sense something beyond that. Something wild and powerful. The feeling I first had when I had arrived in Neverland. I realized a long time ago that I was sensing Neverland's power, and just got used to it. This water, whatever it is, is rich in Neverland's magic.

Why does Pan...wait.

I remember Hook's words in one of our last conversations: "_There's a special water that you can drink that will save you. But, there's a price. Once you drink the water, you're bound to Neverland. You can't leave without dying."_

Magical water that's near the dreamshade. If Pan isn't killing me...

I feel my stomach plunge, and adrenaline shoots through me as I realize his plan. I force myself to stand, and turn to run.

Pan suddenly appears in front of me, and grabs me around the middle, lifting me off my feet when I start to struggle. Once again, his grip is like iron, and unbreakable.

_I don't care what I have to do. I don't know _what _I'm going to do. But not this. Anything, but this._

"No!" I scream. "No, please! NO!"

Pan ignores me, as he drags me to the pool's edge. I can feel the shadow flying away, but it doesn't matter. All that matters is that I get away from the water, and all that it will do to me.

Pan forces me down to my knees, and pushes my back down, so that I'm bending over the water.

_No! This can't be...I won't…he can't…_

"I'm sorry, Vin," Pan mutters.

_No…_

He forces my head into the water.

Immediately, all air is gone. There is nothing around me but water. I can't breathe. I _need _to breath.

_No...I can't...I won't…_

Suddenly, someone pulls me out of my water by my hair. I gasp, taking in the precious air.

"Drink, Vin."

I don't even have time to register what or who tells me this before I'm forced beneath the water again. I'm struggling, trying desperately to escape whatever is holding me down, holding me beneath the water, keeping me from all air.

_I can't breathe...I can't…_

I'm about to be consumed by blackness, when I'm pulled up again by my hair. Immediately, I take in the air, trying to refill my lungs. Between gasping and coughing, I'm not even sure I'm getting any air.

"Just drink, Vin," a voice says. "Drink, and it will all be over."

With that, I'm forced into the water again.

This time, it's harder than ever.

_I need to breathe! I need to-_

_Just do what he says, _a voice in the back of my head says. _End it now. Just drink, or you're going to drown!_

_No...I can't...I've come...I won't...ABBY! _

I'm not even sure if I'm even pulled out. Something changes, and the black almost consumes me.

_Drink the water, Vin._

I'm not sure if the person really said that or I heard it in my head.

As if my body is reacting against my will, my mouth forces itself open, and water rushes in. Before I can stop anything, my mouth closes, and I swallow.

_NO! _

The water has not run past my throat when I'm pulled away from the water. I'm not even sure of my surroundings. I just try to refill my lungs.

For what seems like ages my mind is numb as I cough and gasp, trying so hard not to black out. After what feels like hours, I'm able to breathe normally again, as Pan watches me without even moving. Then my mind starts to work again, and I realize what I've done.

I drank the water. I'm bound to Neverland. I can't leave without dying.

There's no way that I can escape.

"No," I whisper. "No..."

Tears cloud my eyes, and I feel myself sob.

_Please let this all be a bad dream. Please, let me wake up home in bed, with Abby and Mom. Let this end…_

I'm vaguely aware of Pan crouching down next to me, and putting what is meant to be a comforting hand on my shoulder. At his touch, I flinch, and push myself away. Anything to put distance between myself from… from...from _him. _

"I'm sorry, Vin," he says, for once sounding sincere. "But I couldn't let you get that close to escaping again."

Like a small child, I put my hands over my ears. I don't care if it's immature. I don't want to hear. I don't want to listen to him justify what he just did.

_Oh, God. I drank the water. I'm trapped here. _

Pan stands, and gives me an unreadable look, but he doesn't say anything.

Hot tears leak onto my cheeks, but I don't bother to wipe them away.

_This can't be happening. This can't. I can't be trapped here. Not after everything I've done to get out. Not after all I've done to get away. To get home…_

I can feel myself slipping into hysterics. It doesn't matter, though. Nothing matters anymore. Not after what just happened.

Pan walks over, and offers me his hand.

"Come on, Vin," he says. "It's time to go home."

_What is he talking about? He just ripped my only home away from me. Now he's just going to have me go with him to-what-lock me in cage? _

That's when I realize he doesn't have too. He'll never have to lock me in a cage again. He forced me to drink the water. I'm bound to Neverland. He didn't just make it impossible for me to go home, he made it impossible for me to leave.

He turned Neverland into my cage.

He beckons with his fingers, motioning me to take his hand. But I know what will happen if I do. I'll break. I'll lose myself to him. I'll become Vin.

I can't take his hand. But he won't let me leave unless I do.

I can see the impatience in his eyes. Yes, he wants to begin the game again. He's trapped me. He's made me a permanent player of his game.

I once thought hate was the right word for what I felt for Pan. But now, hate doesn't even cover it. I'm not sure there's even a word that describes it.

I just...I want him to suffer. I want him to hurt as much as he's hurt me. I want him to taste his own medicine, and then taste it again, and again, and again.

"I hope someone rips out your heart and then slowly crushes it to dust," I get out, glaring at him.

_Whoa. Where did that come from? My story, I guess…_

Before Pan can reply, I feel something moving, right behind me. It is like the water: wild and powerful. Except, it's much more concentrated, much more sentinent...almost as if whatever I feel is alive.

Suddenly, Pan stands, and for the first time, I see fear in his eyes.

"No…" he whispers. "That's impossible. You disappeared...you disappeared after you showed me hourglass."

I've never seen Pan like this. He's not nervous or anxious. That is real fear on his face, in his voice.

If something can scare Pan like this, I kind of want to shake its hand.

I don't get that. Instead, whatever is behind me rushes forward, and I feel icy cold arms encircle me, the same way Pan's shadow does. Except this time, as soon as the arms are around me, darkness swallows me.

The last thing I'm aware of is that Pan is backing away slowly, looking more terrified than I ever thought possible…

My eyes snap open, as if they were never closed.

_What…_

I blink a few times, trying to clear my mind. I'm not sure what happened. I just… sort of blacked out.

I force myself to sit up, and look around. I know this area. I've seen it a dozen times...where?

I spot a rock formation, behind me. One is oddly shaped. Why is it oddly shaped?

_Because it's a cave,_ I realize, _Bae's cave. _

But that's impossible, because I...I left…

The events crash back on me, of everything that has happened in the last few hours.

Hook. I've lost Hook. He got out, but the shadow grabbed me. Then Pan...Pan…

I gasp, the memory coming back to me.

I drank the water. I can't get out.

I'm not sure what it was that took me, and left me at Bae's cave, that scared Pan so much. But it doesn't matter.

Nothing matters.

I drank the water.

Yes, Pan was holding me down, but _I _was the one who drank. I could have drowned, but instead I drank it.

And now I trapped. I can't get out. I can't leave. I can't go back home.

I failed. I failed to escape. I failed to get away from Pan.

_I failed Abby._

* * *

**A/N: **Like I said before: please don't hate me for this.

Okay, I will say it here and now: y'all are incredible. Over 100 reviews? Over 10,000 views? Seriously? Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU! Y'all are amazing. I couldn't do this without y'all!

A special thanks to **songwriter16, Ice-Snow Witch, Live4dancing, **and **Nicoleee830** for putting this story on alert, and to **Ice-Snow Witch, Live4dancing, **and **Nicoleee830 **for favoriting it. Also, thank you **Dreamer-Girl96, Ode to a Fangirl, Uncommon fairy, Female whovian, meguhanu, Live4dancing, **and the white angel for leaving awesome reviews. And, of course, a special thanks to **Uncommon fairy, **and **Can't-Escape-My-Fandoms**, my wonderful betas!

Please follow, favorite, review, or whatever y'all want. Feedback on Hook's point of view, and Jess's reaction to drinking the water are especially appreciated. **:)**


	24. Chapter 24

**Disclaimer: I do not own OUAT. If I did, Jess would be in the series. Actually, i'd probably get so focused on her, that I'd just give her own spin-off show...yeah, it's probably a good thing I don't own OUAT. **

* * *

Am I alive?

Am I dead?

Does it matter?

_No,_ I think absently, _no, it doesn't._

Everything stopped mattering when Pan forced my head under the water. Everything stopped mattering when I drank the water. When I permanently trapped myself. When I cut myself off from Abby.

_Oh, God. Abby…_

I can't hold back a sob as the thought reaches me. I broke my promise to her. I promised her that I would escape Neverland. That I would get back to her. And I broke it.

She needed me, and, honestly, I need her. But, I can't ever get back to her. I can't ever be free.

I can't get away from Pan.

I'm trapped in a cage, again. Except this time, I can't get out. There is no one to unlock the cage, and let me out. This cage-this hell-is my home now.

_No,_ I think, anger somehow rising in my numbness, _Pan can call it what he likes, but this place isn't home. It's a prison, a cage. Not home. _

Because I lost the only true home I had. I lost it the moment I drank the water.

Now, I'm trapped. And Pan can play with me, manipulate me all he wants. Because I can't run. No matter how hard I try, no matter how fast I run, he will eventually catch up.

_So, why run? Why even try? _

"Jess?"

I start, the voice taking me away from my thoughts. I turn to see Bae, watching me, concern on his face.

_Oh, yeah._

I vaguely remember Bae finding me in a crumpled heap at the entrance of his cave, bringing me inside. He may have asked me what happened, but I don't know. I wasn't listening. All I could think about was Abby. How I failed her. How I will never see her again.

How I never truly got the chance to say good-bye to her. The last time I ever saw my sister was when I was protecting her from Pan.

I could lift the barrier, and let her back in. But I can't. I _won't_.

What if Pan was waiting? What if he tried to pull her back in?

I close my eyes, thinking of...everything.

I'm never going to see her again. I'm never going to watch my beautiful, sweet, innocent baby sister grow up. I won't be there to help her with boy troubles, or give her advice with difficult teachers or parents. To share the books and movies that I really like with her. I won't be able to yell at her when she's embarrassed me, or watch her insist that she wants to study at whatever college I'm attending, just because her big sister went there.

I won't be there to tease her about her first kiss, or help her learn how to do her makeup. To watch her grow up. To be there for her when she needs someone. To take care of her, since Mom and Dad won't.

"Jess?"

Bae's voice brings me back for a moment, and I turn to look at him.

"Are you ready to talk?" he asks, looking concerned.

No, I'm not.

_Dang it, I'm not! _

I never wanted this. I never wanted to know that Peter Pan was real. I never wanted to give up everything to him. I never wanted to meet frigging Captain Hook, and Tinkerbell. I never wanted to learn that I could do magic, that I was powerful. I never wanted to go to Neverland in the first place.

I wanted to stay at home, take care of Abby, graduate high school, write my book, and go to college. I wanted to earn my diploma, find some nice apartment, and give Abby the home she deserved. Not one full of neglect and abandonment.

And I lost it. I didn't just lose Abby, I lost everything. Everything I ever dreamed about, everything I ever wanted. It's all gone.

_Because I'm trapped. Because there's no escape for me. No hope for me. _

Even if I run, even if I hide, Pan has all the time in the world. He's going to try to find me. Even if he does it in a matter of hours or in a few years, he is going to hunt me down like a prized deer, and find me. And when he does, he isn't going to bother to try to hold me. What would be the point? If I ran again, it would just start the game over.

And if I don't run, then he'll break me. I don't know how he'll do it. Maybe he'll use the younger Lost Boys, maybe he'll lock me in a cage again. Heck, maybe he'll even torture me. But, once he does, he'll have control over me again.

And I will break. I'll become Vin. I'll be his slave, his pet, his _toy_, and there will be no escape. No redemption. No hope.

I'm staring up from the bottom of a pit and there is no way I'm climbing out of it. And Pan is just going to dig that pit deeper, until I'm buried alive. Unable to escape, but unable to die.

_Why go through it? Why put myself through that torture? Why should I have to suffer when I have nothing left to live for? There's nothing to look forward too._

There's just pain and endless suffering and misery. Why should I do it? Why should I let Pan break me? Why should I let myself suffer forever because I lost Abby?

_Why should I continue trying anymore? _

Suddenly, out of nowhere, Bae grabs my wrist, and looks me in the eyes. His eyes are full of fear and anger, but I ignore it.

_Why should I keep-_

"Give me the knife, Jess," he says, forcefully.

I blink.

_What knife? What is he talking about? _

"Jess. Give. Me. The. Knife," Bae says slowly and even more forcefully.

I look down at my wrist, and I realize that the one he is holding is the one holding a plain knife, poised over my other, exposed wrist. When did I imagine that?

Without much thought, I release my hold on the knife, confused. In one swift moment, Bae takes it, and secures it in his belt, watching me with a protective concern.

_Why would Bae care so much about one knife? I know him, he has plenty of tools. Why would he need the knife?_

"Why-," I ask, but my throat feels sore and thick, and the words get forced back.

Bae looks me in the eye.

"You were thinking of killing yourself," he replies flatly.

This jars me back to my senses, immediately. I shake my head, in confusion.

"What? No, I wasn't," I protest.

"Yes, you were," Bae insists. "I saw it in your face. In your eyes. You had made a knife, and you were lowering it to your wrist, like you wanted to slit it."

_That's crazy. Why would I do that? Why would I want to kill…_

That's when I remember what I was thinking mere seconds ago. How there was no escape. No hope. How I thought there was no point anymore.

_Oh, God, he's right. I was going to do it. I was going to kill myself. _

Part of me wants to run, the other wants to stay.

I can only stare at the knife that Bae secured and all that it implies. I was going to take my own life. I was going to do it to end the pain before it came. To keep Pan from ever reaching me.

All out of hatred and despair, I was going to commit suicide. And, if Bae hadn't stopped me, I probably would have done so without regret. But now…

"Why were you going to do it, Jess?" asks Bae, not sounding angry, or afraid, but concerned, and...sad.

I don't want to tell him. I want to withdraw into myself again, and cut myself off from the rest of the world. But, I can't. I need to tell him. I just need to let him know. I owe him that much.

"Pan...he…"

_Oh, God. I can't say it._

Every time I think about saying it, I feel like I'm being held under the water again, and I'm swallowing the water.

"He…"

_I can't do this. I can't say. I can't relive this. _

And, maybe...maybe I have a sliver of hope that this is really a horrible nightmare. That I will still wake up at home, safe from Pan, safe from Neverland, safe from everything. But if I say it, if I admit it to myself, then I'm never going to wake up. The last hope that I'm holding onto will die.

Maybe that's why I was going to do it...because I didn't want to give up that last hope.

But, I was going to do it. I was going to kill myself. And, despite what I told Hook that I preferred the poison to the eternal imprisonment, despite what I told Pan when I said all he could do to me was kill me, I've realized something in the few brief moments after I've killed myself: I don't want to die.

I don't want to be Pan's toy, I don't want to break. But, still, I don't want to die.

"He broke me, Bae!" I gasp.

There, I said it. And with it, the last hope that this is all in my head fades. Now he knows. I know it.

_I can't...I can't keep…_

My thoughts are so broken, I'm not even sure what I'm doing or saying anymore.

I'm crying my eyes out, babbling the events at the pool to Bae, but inside, I'm like a shell. Then, suddenly, I'm standing up, and throwing things around the cave even though I have no idea how I got there.

"It's not fair!" I scream, upending a table. "It's not fair! I made the sacrifice to save Abby! I made the choice to leave behind the kids! I could have left anytime, instead of leaving with Hook! I did what was right! I made the right choice, but I'm still a prisoner! I'm still his plaything. It's. Not. Fair!"

Bae is pulling me away from everything, holding my hands so that I can't move them, but his touch is still gentle and soothing.

_But I don't want gentle and soothing. I want to be free. _

"Let me go!" I shout, struggling. "I hate you. I hate you more than anything. Let me go!"

I'm not even sure if I'm shouting at Bae or at Pan.

I don't know how long I kick, struggle, and scream, trying to free myself from Bae's grip. I just want to be free. I just to run, to hit something, to make it feel as badly as I do now, just so that someone, something, would understand what it's like.

I want to know why. Why I had to be the one that Pan chose, why it had to be me that was trapped on Neverland. Why I had to be chosen in the first place.

_Oh, God, I wish I could just understand. _

It shouldn't have happened like this. I held onto hope. Even when I was locked in the cage, even when I almost killed Felix, I still held onto the hope that I could somehow get to Neverland. That's how it's supposed to work in every fairytale, right?

The hero holds onto hope throughout all of his trials, and in the end, his hope is fulfilled. But why did it have to be like this for me? Why did I have to be the one that had to fail in the end?

_God, I just want to know why. _

Finally, I've stopped screaming, ranting, and struggling. I just lay limp in Bae's arms, whimpering like a small child. I _feel_ like a small child.

Bae, sensing that I've calmed down, gently releases me, and helps me lay down on the cave floor. As soon as I'm still on the floor, he runs to his small alcove bed, grabs his blanket, and puts it over me.

I can only look up at him with tear-stained eyes.

"How am I supposed to keep going, Bae?" I ask him, my voice small and weak. Exactly how I feel.

"How am I supposed to accept that everyone I know will grow up and die while I live forever here? How am I supposed to remember them after so long? How long until Abby becomes just a name, and I forget how much she means to me?"

Bae looks at me for a long time, as if thinking his answer over carefully.

"I don't know," he finally replies. "But I do know that you never truly forget. I've lost track of how long I've been here, yet I still remember Papa. And the Darlings. If you love Abby as much as you seemed to, then you'll never really forget her."

I sniffle, and use the back of my hand to wipe my nose, not caring how gross it is.

"I don't want to die, Bae," I tell him. "But how am I supposed to survive? How am I supposed to make it?"

At this, Bae sighs, and sits next to me, rubbing my arm comfortingly.

"Don't worry, Jess," he murmurs. "I'm going to take care of you. I promise."

I let his words sink in, but I don't reply. I only stare into the flames of the torch for I don't know how long, until I finally drift off into an uneasy sleep.

* * *

Peter didn't remember the last time he felt this scared.

He had been anxious that he wouldn't be able to catch Vin, especially after she tricked him into kissing her, but his shadow never failed him. But he caught her. Even better, he had trapped her. And he saw it as soon as she realized what she had done. That next step that she had taken. She was closer than ever to being broken. All it would take would be a little push here, and a little shove there, and she would break. She would give into him, and practically beg to give him her heart when the time came.

By all means, he should have been celebrating. But instead, for the first time in a very, very long time, he felt afraid.

Why?

Because _it _had returned. The thing that had made him who he was. The thing that made him start on his quest to find the Heart of the Truest Believer, and the most powerful Dreamer.

The sole inhabitant of Neverland. The first shadow.

Peter remembered the creature all too clearly. He didn't have the power of a Dreamer, like Vin, but he could still sense its power when it met him in the Pixie Dust Tree, and told him that he didn't belong in Neverland.

So, Peter had done what he had to do: he gave up Rumpelstiltskin, and became a boy again. All because of the Shadow.

But, after the thing had shown him the hourglass that fueled his youth, it had disappeared, probably into the Dark Hollow. Not that Peter minded at all. He could sense that the Shadow didn't like how he had-what had it said-broken the rules. He was alright living on his own without the Shadow always watching him, with its cold eyes and rattling breath.

After a while, he had realized he could not live on his own, so he had cut off his own shadow, which provided him with companionship and service. But, eventually that grew dull, so Peter started to travel the Enchanted Forest, the Land Without Magic, Wonderland, and all other realms, gaining members for the Lost Boys, and slowly piecing together what he needed in order to continue living when the sand had run out of the hourglass.

And now, after centuries, the shadow had emerged from wherever it was hiding, not to help him, as it did before, but to take Vin. He didn't know where she was, or if she realized what took her. He just knew that he couldn't look for her as long as the Shadow was involved.

That's when he felt it. The strong, wild power of the sole inhabitant of Neverland. It had come back.

For a moment, Peter was afraid that it was going to kill him. But, as he reminded himself, if the Shadow wanted to kill him, it would have done so long ago.

He sighed, and inwardly prepared himself, using a smirk to mask his fear.

"You can show yourself," he said, turning to the area where he knew the shadow was waiting. "I won't bite."

The Shadow flew out from its hiding place, and looked down at Peter. The Shadow didn't have a face, but it did not need one. Peter could tell that it was annoyed with him. That wasn't good.

But, he had to be the one in control. He couldn't let the shadow see that it was the only living thing Peter feared. The other...well death wasn't exactly a living thing, now was it?

"Why did you take Vin?" he asked, calmly.

He was really more eager to learn where she was, but the boys could find her on their own. If he asked the Shadow, it could lead him or his boys into a trap. This question, however, would be more helpful in the long run.

"It is my job to protect that which is important to Neverland," replied the Shadow in it's high, cold voice, that still sent chills down Peter's spine. "The girl is a Dreamer. In Neverland, she could be a god if she wanted. You used the power of Neverland against her when you forced her to drink the water. In doing so, I was alerted, and it became my task to protect her."

That wasn't good. If Vin was in the Shadow's protection, then there was no way of reaching her. Not if he posed a threat towards her. The Shadow would ensure that neither he nor the boys could take her.

But, instead of showing these emotions, Peter just let out a small chuckle.

"Oh, so now you're a guard dog?" he scoffed. "Protecting a helpless little girl from the evil villain...very heroic."

The Shadow didn't reply. Evidently, it didn't have a sense of humor. Peter would have to be serious, then.

"You can't keep her from me," he said, his tone losing his playfulness. "I need her heart to live. Even if I have to wait twenty years to track her down and drag her back, I will find her and carve out that powerful heart from her chest with my bare hands if I have too."

"The girl is under my protection," said the Shadow, clearly not impressed. "As long as you threaten her, you will not be able to touch a hair on her head."

Peter knew this to be true, but he couldn't admit that. That would mean that he failed. And Peter Pan never failed.

"I'd like to see you try to protect her," he challenged. "You seem to forget that I was willing to give up my own son to be young again. Do you really think I won't get her back through any means necessary?"

"You seem to forget that it is the magic of Neverland that is fueling your youth and immortality in the first place," retorted the Shadow without hesitation. "You do not rule Neverland; your presence is simply tolerated. If you try to take the girl by force, even with your magic pipes, you will force Neverland to choose between the man who gave up his only son to break the rules, and stay on Neverland, or the powerful Dreamer who gave up her freedom for her sister. Which do you think it will choose?"

Peter tried to uphold his look of confidence, but inside, his stomach plunged. He knew the Shadow wasn't lying. It never lied. If Peter went after Vin, the entire fury of Neverland would rain down on him. Or, it might not even have to. All it would have to do is take away his youth. He'd go back to being a man, or worse, fall dead on the spot.

The threat was very real. He truly couldn't pursue Vin without dying. That would make Vin's entire purpose useless. She was there to buy him time, not cause him to die.

But if the Shadow saw him falter, it would know that he was afraid. That he didn't want to die. He couldn't let it see that. He couldn't let it see that it was the only thing he truly feared.

"Any rule can be broken," he insisted. "And if anyone can break the rules, it's me. I broke the rule that anyone, much less an adult, couldn't live on Neverland. I will break the rule that I have to die when the sand runs out when I have the Heart of the Truest Believer. If there is anyway to get her back, I will."

This time, it was the Shadow's turn to scoff.

"Do not underestimate the power of Neverland," it warned. "As long as you try to take her, she will be shielded, not just from your 'Lost Boys,' but from your magic as well."

Peter knew it was true. Even if the Shadow made it so that she was invisible to him, there would be no way that he could take her by force. No way to take her and play with her.

But, then again, he may have already found his loophole.

"If I try to take her, you'll stop me," he said. "But what if she comes to me of her own free will?"

The Shadow paused. Yes, there it was. The loophole that Peter needed.

"You won't be able to stop her, will you?" he asked, a grin creeping on her face. "Because I'm not taking her by force."

The Shadow narrowed its glowing eyes.

"Good luck finding her to convince her to come to you," it taunted.

That didn't matter. She would have to be on Neverland for it to hide her. He would just have to wait. And he had time, plenty of time. Besides, there were other ways of convincing her to break. Ways that required no speaking at all.

"Good luck keeping her from me," he replied. "_When_ she comes to me, I will make sure to tell you that I told you so."

With that, he turned, and walked away. He was eager to get away from the Shadow as fast as possible.

"And what happens when she learns that she isn't bound to Neverland?" asked the Shadow. "That she would only be bound if she had been poisoned by dreamshade first?"

Peter felt his heart drop when he understood what it was saying. When she realizes that he had lied. When she realizes that she could really leave Neverland.

"Then I will make sure she never finds out," replied Peter. "Even if I have to use magic to make sure she never learns, I will keep that secret safer than any I've ever kept. Even more than the secret of my son. I've hidden secrets from her before, and I can do it again."

"Such as?" the Shadow asked in a dry voice.

At this, Peter had to smile, unable to stop the feeling of pride within him.

"Like how I could never pull her sister back into Neverland," he replied. "I can only make it look like it. The little girl was in no danger at all, but Vin shut her out of Neverland anyway."

He turned back to the Shadow, and plastered a smirk on his face, hiding his fear.

"Hold onto her while you can," he challenged. "She may be practically a god, but she is _my_ Dreamer. Vin is mine, and mine alone."

* * *

**A/N: **Wow. Y'all remember a while ago, when I said the chapter of Hook and Bae rescuing Jess from Neverland was the hardest chapter I had to write? That chapter had _nothing_ on this chapter. Writing Jess's grief was one of the toughest things I've ever had to do. And while I was writing it, I was listening to **I Dreamed A Dream**from Les Miserables, and that made me very depressed for the rest of the evening. So, feedback on this chapter would be really, really appreciated. Thanks, guys!

A special thanks to **WhoLock93, **and** catlover2015** for putting this story on alert, and to **CJE, asdfghjkl1292, charmedhpgirl, Liquidation, **and **catlover2015** for favoriting it. Also, thank you **narisadar, thewritershavetheTARDIS, meguhanu, Revengest, Ode to a Fangirl, **and The white angel for your awesome reviews. Finally, thank you to my amazing betas **Can't-Escape-My-Fandoms **and **Uncommon fairy. **

Please follow, favorite, and review, or whatever y'all want. Feedback on Jess's grieving process, and the Shadow are especially appreciated. **:)**


	25. Chapter 25

**Disclaimer: I was thinking of calling the guys at ABC, and work out a deal, but I couldn't get the number. So, I still don't own OUAT.**

* * *

_Water...I can't breathe...trapped...No!_

My eyes fly open, but in my mind I'm still in my nightmare. I'm still drowning in the black, dark water.

_Breathe! Get out of the water, get away from Pan, breathe!_

I'm suddenly aware that I'm screaming, but I have no idea how if I'm underwater. But, I'm still in the darkness, so I still must be drowning. Maybe the screams are in my head.

I hear a scraping sound, and fire light fills the room.

No, not a room. A cave. Bae's cave.

_How is that possible? I still can't breathe..._

"Jess? Jess?"

I see Bae running to me and crouching down beside me, gently cupping my face in his hands.

"Look at me, Jess," he says over my screams. "Look at me."

My eyes lock with his, and I stop screaming. But this does nothing to convince me that I'm not still drowning.

"It's alright," says Bae, soothingly. "It's okay. It was just a nightmare. You're safe."

Safe. Once, I had to be careful to never feel safe. Now, all I want to feel is safe.

I shake my head, as if denying what he's saying.

_How can I be safe? I'm trapped here on the island. How am I supposed to ever feel safe again? _

"No," I whisper. "No, I'm not."

"Yes, you are," Bae insists. "I'm going to take care of you. You're going to be okay."

I'm still panting, but Bae inhales and exhales deeply, gesturing that I do the same. Slowly, I take a deep breath, and let it out. Then again, in and out. When I've calmed down a little, I pull away, and sit back, leaning against the cave wall.

"Are you alright?" asks Bae, warily, ready to help calm me down if I'm not.

I slowly nod, and wipe away the tears that were shed when I woke up.

"Are you sure?" he asks, carefully.

"Yeah," I reply. "I'm fine."

He nods, and moves over to the tables that I upturned earlier in my fit. He starts to set them upright, and replace the food and tools back on them.

_Why doesn't he go back to sleep? He knows I'm fine…_

I realize it's because he's worried about me. He's afraid I might have another tantrum, or try to kill myself again. He needs to be awake to calm me down. To stop me from going too far.

No, I don't want to think about that. I don't want to go back to how I was before Bae calmed me down. Shrieking, miserable, ready to commit suicide. If I go back to that, I'm only going to lose myself faster.

_I'll be doing Pan's job for him. _

The idea fills me with so much disgust, I decide that I need to think about something else. Anything else. I turn to Bae, as he places a candle in a coconut back on one of the tables. There's something I've been meaning to ask him, but I keep forgetting. Might as well ask it now. It will help take my mind off of things.

"Bae," I ask, my voice croaky from waking up and screaming. "Were there ever Indians on the island?"

Bae pauses, and I can tell the question has more meaning to him than I thought.

"Why do you ask?" he asks casually. Too casually.

_Something's up here._

I shrug, taking on a casual persona as well.

"In the story I read," I explain. "Pan, the Lost Boys, Hook, TinkerBell, Wendy, they were all their. But there was also this Indian tribe that lived on the island. I know the story messed up on a lot of details, but I've never seen any signs of Indians. I wondered if that was another messed up detail too."

Actually, that's a bit of an understatement. The book got almost _all_ of the details wrong.

Bae sighs, and turns to look at me. Again, I see in his eyes the person beyond the boy's body. The one who has had to survive through so many things, grow up fast on the inside, even though he has always remained the same on the outside.

He sits down, and for a second, he truly does look like the aged, tired person I know he his deep down.

"I might as well tell you," he says, almost to himself. "You will find out eventually."

_Especially now that I'm supposed to stay on Neverland forever, a permanent prisoner of-No, I'm not going to think about it. _

"There were Indians on the island," he says. "I'm not sure how they got here, or where they came from; they were on Neverland before I was taken. But, however they came, Pan wasn't sure if he liked them or not. He played with them, forcing them to fight for their survival. He was still doing it when Hook handed me over to the Lost Boys. They were good, though. They knew how to live off the island and use it to their advantage when Pan played of his games with them. So, after a while, he got bored, and left them alone."

That sounds like Pan. Not caring who you are, or how you got there, just that you play his little games. Make you one of his toys until you don't even see it yourself.

"Anyway," says Bae, continuing with his story. "The Indians weren't growing up either. The elderly stayed old, and the children..well, they couldn't grow up. And, after a while, the boys of the tribe got upset, because they were still being treated like children, when they were really growing up on the inside. Finally, one night, most of them came to Pan's camp, saying they wanted to join. Pan took them on without a second thought. But, the rest of the tribe didn't like that."

_Oh, dear, I can see where this is going…_

"They demanded that Pan return their children to them, but Pan refused to give up Lost Boys that came so willingly. So, the Indians fought Pan, and he fought back."

He closes his eyes, and I can see his pained expression, as if he remembers the horror of what happened when Pan fought the Indians.

"I got lucky," he murmurs. "The Indians were silent in battle. They could sneak up on you in a flash, without making a sound. So many boys were killed during that time. But, Pan fought back even harder, setting up traps to kill the Indians, and using magic. The leader of the tribe eventually realized that the Indians couldn't win the war, so he called for the fighting to stop, and tried to make peace with Pan. I remember him offering to let Pan keep the boys, and even give his own daughter to Pan."

_The chief's daughter. No way, it couldn't be…_

"Tiger Lilly?" I ask, almost not believing that the famous Indian girl was real.

Bae looks at me, and if what I saw before was pain, the look he gives me is agony.

"Yes," he whispers. "Tiger Lilly."

The pain in his eyes, the way he says her name...there is something more to this story.

"What happened?" I ask, quietly, torn between wanting to know, and not making Bae remembering.

His eyes screw shut, as if he is recalling a painful memory.

"Pan said that he would meet at sunset the next day to discuss his terms," he says. "But as soon as he delivered this message, he told the boys to start preparing themselves. He was going to have us ambush the Indians, and kill them at dawn."

I feel my heart plunge, as I realize what he's saying. I know Pan to be a horrible, cruel bastard, but I never thought he would be willing to _massacre_ an entire people just to keep a few boys.

_Then again, look at the measures he took to imprison me, _I think numbly. _I don't think limits are something he recognizes. _

"He didn't," I whisper. " He didn't kill them all, did he?"

The horror of it, just knowing that Pan is capable of murdering a desperate race in cold blood…

This was before I pinned him against that tree. This was before I let his regret get sucked out. If he was already like this before..._what kind of monster did I help create?_

I shiver at the thought, especially when I realize that the very same monster is after me.

"He was going to kill them," Bae replies, quietly. "But, when I realized what he was doing I...I don't know. I just knew I couldn't let it happen. I wouldn't let it happen. So, when he wasn't looking, I slipped out of camp, found the Indians, and told them what Pan was planning. I-I couldn't stop them. They were so angry, so scared. They told me and Tiger Lilly to hide in the trees, and that they would find us when it was safe to come out. Then, they left. They attacked Pan before he could attack them...and-and-"

He cuts off with a choking sob, and I can see something else in his eyes beyond pain: guilt.

"It was a bloodbath, Jess, a _bloodbath_," he whispers. "The Indians were scared, and angry, and that made them reckless. They surprised Pan, but by dawn, Tiger Lilly and I were the only ones left. The Indian boys even turned on Pan when they saw what he did, and they were killed for it."

He meets my eyes, and I realize what he is isn't the strong boy who promised to look after me. He is a torn person, left with nothing but guilt, and pain.

"Oh, Bae," I whisper. Immediately, I go to his side, and wrap him in a hug.

And I thought I had it bad. I'm trapped on the island forever, but Bae? Bae has been through so much, pain and betrayal. He never deserved this. He never should have had to be put through this.

"What happened wasn't your fault," I murmur. "You tried to stop it from happening, and that is what counts. You are in no way responsible for what happened."

He nods, and I look at him, surprised by what I see.

"I know," he whispers. "It's just...hard. Knowing that I did the right thing, but it was all for nothing…"

I know how he feels. I made the choice to trade myself for Abby, but in the end..._no, I can't think about that right now. _

For a brief moment, we stay like this. Just sitting there, comforting the other, silently promising the other that everything will be alright.

Then, the moment ends, and Bae pulls away.

"We need some more water," he mutters.

I know that I can easily just imagine some, but I can tell he needs some time alone. He needs to gather himself up again.

This probably would not be a good time to ask him what happened to Tiger Lilly..

He gets up, and asks me once more if I'm alright. I assure him that I am, and he leaves. He leaves me alone with my thoughts.

_If I was going to do it, this would be the time…_

But I'm not going to. I'm not going to kill myself. Because, even if I'm trapped on this hell forever, even if Pan tries to hunt me down and torture me, deep down, I don't want to die.

Not like this. Not alone, miserable, wallowing in self pity.

But I need to do _something_.

I'm trapped on this island forever. There's no way I can leave without dying. And if Pan wants me as much as he says he does, he isn't going to let me go. He will find me, and he will do everything he can to make me Vin. I refuse to let that happen.

I can't die, but I can't give into Pan. Is there anything I _can _do? I don't know if anyone could do anything in my situation…

_Bae has. _

The thought strikes me hard, and I'm surprised by the effect that one random thought has. Because it's true.

He's gone through so much pain, and has suffered far too much. But, despite the breakdown I just saw, I truly believe that he's moved on. But, that doesn't take away the pain when he thinks about what happened. I don't think that pain ever really leaves you. It is just always there, pushing you to keep going.

Despite all that pain, all that suffering, he has learned to live with it. Why can't I do the same?

_Why can't I accept that I'm trapped here and that there really is no way for me to get out of this?_

Because it means letting go. It means accepting that I'll never see Abby again. And even worse, it will mean accepting that Pan will eventually find me and break me. How am I supposed to accept that of all things?

_Maybe you don't have to, _something says in the back of my mind. _Maybe you can use what you did all that time ago when Pan taught you how to use your power…_

I blink, remembering. Pan had been hoping that teaching me my abilities would help break me. Instead, I was able to turn it around on him. I was able to use my powers to create things that reminded me why I still had to fight. Why I couldn't give in.

And that's what I need to do here.

Pan thinks that what he has done will break me. For a while, I thought so too.

_But, why can't I turn the tables on him again? Why can't I use the pain I feel for losing Abby, for losing my freedom to drive me to keep fighting? _

Abby wouldn't want me to break. She'd want me to keep fighting.

I lost her because of Pan. I lost everything because of Pan. So, I'm not going to let him win. I'm not going to wallow in self pity until I break for him. I'm going to let the pain come, and I'm going to use it to drive me. To keep myself from giving in.

But, just as I needed the books to help me when I was learning how to imagine, I will need something physical. Something tangible. Something I can touch, see, feel, and remind me that I can't give in.

Something that not even Pan can take from me.

Something that not even the all powerful Peter Pan can take from me.

Realizing what I need to do, I close my eyes. I imagine a door, like the ones on a safe. A door that only I can open. I, and no one else, even if they somehow disguise themselves as me.

I can only open it of my own free will. If I'm being forced, threatened, blackmailed, tricked, or anything like that, then the door won't open for me.

I open my eyes, and I see the door hovering in front of me.

A feel the corners of my lips rise, and I open the door. Behind the door is just empty, black space. Nothing. Which is the point.

I let my imagination run wild at this point.

I imagine everything I can think of related to home.

Pictures of Abby, my best friends, Roxanne and Dom, even pictures of Mom and Dad, from before, when we were a family. I imagine my notebook filled with my story about Snow White and Prince Charming. I imagine a copy of _The Silver Chair_, then in a fit of giddiness, I imagine the entire Narnia series. Then the other books I read, whether _Lord of the Rings, Ben-Hur, _or _Les Miserables_

All of these, I put into the space behind the door.

Then, I think of all the pain I've gone through, and I let my imagine take hold of that.

I imagine the butterfly pendant that Hook gave me. I imagine the earrings that Dad left me as a going away gift, as if earrings could make up for abandoning us. I imagine the bowl that Abby and I would always use to share apple slices and peanut butter, when all we had was each other, without Mom around. I imagine the arrow I fired at Felix, the knife I threw at Sebastian, the copy of _The Princess Bride_ that I read to the younger boys. Even pictures of friends from grade school that grew up to be annoying, girly-girls.

As I put these in the space, I feel tears falling down my cheeks, as I let the pain go. The pain is still a part of me, and letting go of it is hard. But I need to do it. And if anything, I'm not letting go of it. I'm redirecting it, so that it may drive me.

After this, I think of everything that has made me who I am. Small, subtle things.

I imagine my favorite bracelet that got left behind when I got taken, my car keys, the ticket to the midnight screening of _Return of the Jedi,_ the denim jacket that I wore when I made the deal with Pan. I imagine the essay I wrote in freshman year about my love of reading, that I was so proud of, and the painting I made when I was five of dancing penguins that Mom always went on about. I imagine the stuffed raccoon that I had when I was ten, the tape with all my favorite songs, the deck of playing cards that I would use to play solitaire when I was bored.

The things that I can always look back on, knowing who I am. That I'm not Pan's toy. I'm not his pet. I'm not the girl he trapped, and is trying to break.

I'm just a regular girl, thrown into this world without a clue. A girl who will fight back. Who won't break. Who won't give in.

Whenever I open this door, I'm always going to remember who I am, no matter how hard it gets. And not even Pan can destroy it.

Because it is what makes up me. It is what will help _me _keep my mind safe.

My mind safe…

It is sort of like a safe isn't it? But it needs a better ring to it…

_A mindbox, perhaps?_

For the first time, even though I thought it impossible, I feel a smile come on my lips.

_I won't stop fighting, Pan. No matter how hard you play, I am not going to give in. You think you've hurt me, but in reality, you have given me the best weapon against you. As long as I remember who I am, you will not break me. _

I have truly won this round. _Point to Jess._

* * *

**A/N: **

First of all, I'm so sorry for the late update. I was completely swamped with studying last night, and I hardly had time to even edit this chapter. But, I will make sure next chapter comes out on time.

Also, feedback on the concept of the mindbox would be greatly appreciated. It will come up later, and I want to make sure it's understandable.

A special thanks to **AndoraStar, ZappedOfOriginality, SuperBrooke3, **and **Hi-I know the name isnt good **for putting this story on alert, and to **AndoraStar, ****SuperBrooke3, **and **Hi-I know the name isnt good** for favoriting Fading Away. Also, thank you **Ode to a Fangirl, AndoraStar, meguhanu, scorpiongirl92, Regalgal1524, **the white angel, and Guest for your awesome reviews. And, as always, a special thanks to my betas, **Can't-Escape-My-Fandoms, **and **Uncommon fairy. ** Thanks a bunch; I couldn't do this without y'all!

Please follow, favorite, review, or whatever y'all want. Thoughts on the mindbox and Bae's story of the Indians are especially appreciated. **:)**


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